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TV writer/producer: LA to Vegas, You're The Worst. Probably wearing a Victorian baby ring right now.

930 Following   7,352 Followers   7,454 Tweets

Joined Twitter 2/22/09


ALL MY INTERESTS (Eva, Amy, dogs, IT) https://t.co/oSxsZNDYOi
2/18
2018
Hey, people cheering for Jen and Brad to get back together: not everything from the 90s needs a reboot
2/15
2018
Check out this NSFW trailer for @TheCaliforniaNo, premiering SATURDAY @SFIndieFest! https://t.co/zKqU8j79dQ
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
2/9
2018
An all-new #LAtoVegas touches down tonight, featuring my son! Not Arthur! My non-dog son! 9/8c @FOXTV @LAtoVegasFOX https://t.co/DS3R5A8otD
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
2/6
2018
I’m so glad this gross story from my hometown area got a nice ending! @ChelseaClinton is great. https://t.co/5WaTUp9HQ2
2/1
2018
Our queen @danisanwitz! ❤️ Yay! https://t.co/yVvCBQH11nMy baby has started doing stuff for a laugh. I do it, but then I scream THIS IS NOT YOUR VALUE. I WOULD ALSO APPLAU… https://t.co/pLQdr4aDHgThis is so insane. https://t.co/GbdS4hjVP3I thought my sex deal was pretty vanilla until I saw this ad https://t.co/pGVdtBYqku
1/31
2018
In my teens, I read in a magazine that when you’re tired, a simple red lip can make you look pulled together. Anywa… https://t.co/fTOq9mcOrW
1/29
2018
Check out this sad, funny, pathetic and yet still very handsome first look at me and my pals in The California No,… https://t.co/iSP8Tqgmqp
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/28
2018
“Accept yourself as a weird nerd. Forever. You’ll never be cool.” - Saturday night with @franklinhardy, at a legit cool art event @allegraringo @LizHackett Rhoda dragging her bed onto the baby’s mat. https://t.co/KQT9PJdWYyI just made plans with my girlfriends, weeks out, for 9AM. Brb gotta moisturize my neck
1/27
2018
@katespencer It’s really for the chain. Everything I do is for the chainI can’t wait until the first true crime podcast about a true crime podcast host who lured people into a van with hi… https://t.co/M5yanlIjr3
1/25
2018
At risk of sounding like a broken Janet, #TheGoodPlace is so smart and funny. I love it so much.
1/24
2018
RETWEET if you have your inflight drinks ready. #LAtoVegas is flying high tonight at 9/8c. https://t.co/09vp0oYtJR
Retweeted by Alison BennettTV is all about collaboration and, apparently, ordering an entire smoked turkey for the room at 3pm, but tonight is my #LAtoVegas episode!Only Jordan Peele and Greta Gerwig should be able to even ATTEND the Oscars. In between hugs, they can occasionally… https://t.co/g4544oFed4
1/23
2018
The rudest thing ever said to me at work was that I was not a millennial
1/22
2018
Come see this show tonight! Last night I saw Angelyne on a UCB stage and I promise to be at least .01% as magical. https://t.co/CzNvj83zNO
1/21
2018
@tylercoates Hahaha. This whole notebook is insanity. Apparently, my sister and I ordered DOMINOS when she came to… https://t.co/JRM3pf2eNH @ErinJanune On the list.Everyone should do this exercise so they too can look back and remember the good of the bad times: I once tried to… https://t.co/ZV76JgWjLdWhen I was getting divorced a few years ago, I kept a notebook of everything funny that happened. Looking at it now… https://t.co/xskkVoh8dU @bdgrabinski I love that show so much! (not caught up yet but working on it DAILY)Letters From Dads Who Call It Babysitting When They’re Watching Their Own Kids Letters From People Who Take Up Two… https://t.co/eeTHFRdhaN
Retweeted by Alison Bennett @Laura_Willcox Lewisburg Segan
1/20
2018
It’s freeing to be of child-bearing age in a time when you can name your kid literally anythingI’m doing a fun show at UCBT Franklin on Sunday hosted by @katespencer and @theanthonyking! Also cool cats… https://t.co/9tK6CXycT6Actor Noah Segan (@kidblue) joins @MattGourley this week to discuss his role as X-wing fighter pilot Stomeroni Star… https://t.co/Osf2WVPD51
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/19
2018
@justjenn The difference in how LIGHT and FREE Obama seems post-White House was insane. So funny and relaxed. Ugh, I love him.In the ultimate television-as-escapism move last night, I watched the Letterman Obama interview and then chased it… https://t.co/SQlOSp2lUqThis is fantastic. https://t.co/WLW7bkylPh
1/17
2018
LA! This is going to be an insane show with all my favorite people. Like ANGELYNE! Get a babysitter like I did and… https://t.co/XPLVNNE1yIIf any scientists are reading this, 1) oooh, I’m genuinely excited and 2) there is a TRILLION dollar opportunity ou… https://t.co/up0drpnFeF @EliOlsberg I had a terrible flu 12/25. 12/26 I woke up, had some of my mom’s “taco dip,” had Chipotle for lunch, a… https://t.co/hHwgzpAN8BTonight on #LAToVegas: a very intense, mustachioed feud! https://t.co/xZNOfmhSKI
1/16
2018
If you can make it to Tuesday, this happens on LA to Vegas. #DerbelMcDillet https://t.co/rkLlWm4kxB
Retweeted by Alison BennettThat’s what I love about the Target at Western and Sunset, man. I get older and it stays the same age.
Retweeted by Alison Bennett @mollygorelick This family loves to update @tylercoates If I Did It by Alison Bennett (I did)“What’s something that grabs a baby’s attention?” “A vomiting dog?” “You’re a genius, Brenda”My baby’s development app took a real weird turn this morning. https://t.co/Cmy0PiwOie
1/14
2018
I put my face into that art app and I got a Mapplethorpe.I posted about a dog I found on the Eagle Rock 2 ramp earlier. The owners have been found! What a morning. @allegraringo Chip was never registered. Ughhh @allegraringo My heart is still pounding! She’s chipped so hopefully it’s up to date!in southeastern pennsylvania “go eagles” can mean “i’m disappointed but not surprised in a sudden drop to 30 degree… https://t.co/u4F1eJvisz
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/13
2018
Most terrifying, intimidating shop girls: 3) hip boutiques 2) vintage stalls 1) CHEESE SHOPS. CHEESE SHOP GIRLS ARE THE COOLEST @impatientchick Weirdly not even offered to the point I thought Jay-Z wasn’t on Spotify“No, Alexa. Not ‘Hard Knock Life’ by Quvenzhané Wallis! ‘Hard Knock Life’ by Andrea McArdle!” - modern parenting is hard @jenyamato @rianjohnson @LACMA Also shout to the guy that gave us #StomeroniStarckLives pins!! ✨ https://t.co/KIYjQUTNeM
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/12
2018
@leilacohan @bennettleigh Harassment isn't about making jokes. It's about slapping women down and reminding them th… https://t.co/BwKjF5VQ0K
Retweeted by Alison Bennett @bennettleigh I have been in DISGUSTING rooms where I only felt safe and loved and rooms that were way less raunchy… https://t.co/dwh7QzURfd
Retweeted by Alison BennettI’ve worked in writers’ rooms for years. The idea that banning harassment has a “chilling effect” is an absurd fict… https://t.co/tAM1vM5WtK
Retweeted by Alison BennettIt’s possible to make raunchy jokes and keep it a safe environment. It is also possible to be working on the most m… https://t.co/UWI7aDnDUIWen did you know Trump was racist? 1. Housing discrimination 2. Central Park 5 lie 3. Birtherism 4. Called Mexicans… https://t.co/CWQvqCskEF
Retweeted by Alison BennettDo you think it was hard for Stacey, as a diabetic, to be best friends with Claudia?
Retweeted by Alison BennettMy hair is finally getting the recognition it deserves, thanks to @pablohidalgo https://t.co/7fWBN9h9Kc
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/11
2018
Excited for my "hapless, nearless useless beta-male" husband! https://t.co/dUonLIdU0Q“The worst thing I can say about Trump, actual worst person, is that he’s like... an ACTOR” ZzzzzzzEveryone is grossing me out in “Fire and Fury,” but so is Wolff’s constant bashing of Hollywood. Zzzzzzzz
1/10
2018
Yay! All-new episode tonight! https://t.co/6lT91rcFxJ
1/9
2018
Girl, the call is coming from inside the house https://t.co/BQivS8AlA5Whether it's a list of the year's best directors or the candidates on your ballot, let's never have a moment like t… https://t.co/XZiCe0oZMO
Retweeted by Alison BennettPrepare for take off! #LAtoVegas is all-new tomorrow at 9/8c. https://t.co/GZVk8QaHHz
Retweeted by Alison BennettIcons never die. https://t.co/Xb2o3ksyW4
Retweeted by Alison BennettJust before giving a great speech, Oprah ragged on her best friend about her dry elbows, and that’s why I love her.… https://t.co/pUd0CXnnZV
1/8
2018
@thecascott I was thinking of the Jill Stein/anti-Hillary stuff, but yeah, sure!Geena Davis backstage right now: “So... Susan... what have... you been up to?”Natalie Portman you savage queen 💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫
Retweeted by Alison Bennett @BoobsRadley Haha @kidblue said the same thingUm, guys? https://t.co/uRz2my0iHFAniston’s hair is Rachel-adjacent and I’m ready for The Return.#TIMESUP https://t.co/higrhJX4ne
Retweeted by Alison Bennett
1/7
2018
@natashavc @ChaseMit I think the magic of Carrie Coon is that she can make you believe whatever you want to believe @ChaseMit + a 61-year-old man playing a dad of kids under ten in the early 70s
1/6
2018

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