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Fred Beukema @beukema Minneapolis, MN

Struct Eng, Improv, husband/dad. || You may think that you crave true love, but it is not a game for cowards. Neither is Scrabble. - Onion horoscopes

191 Following   443 Followers   6,500 Tweets

Joined Twitter 5/3/09

@ItsTheBrandi He and Wm. really have a tortoise and hare situation going on.YouTube disables audio on John Cage's "4'33" (via @JennySampirisi)
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaA HS softball team let three runs score while celebrating prematurely ... And lost a title:
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThe idea—expressed by some GOPers here—that Trump could win with message of “bitches ain’t shit” is ludicrous.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @jbouie What is this from?The most important lesson for all creatives wanting to pursue a professional career:
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@365daysoftwins You should introduce the kids to Radiohead tonight. @365daysoftwins I understand that Kid A strikes a good balance between accessibility and artistic breakthrough, but I prefer OK Computer. @RobinKimball my excitement is tempered by a male show runner, but we’ll see how writers/directors shake out.Exclusive: Elisabeth Moss to Star in Hulu Straight-to-Series Drama 'Handmaid's Tale'
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaIt’s the same combination of special snowflake beliefs and deep ignorance about how fragile modernity and order actually are.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThis most reminds me of anti-vaxxers who argue their kids don’t need vaccines because of herd immunity.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @AngryBlackLady This guy has written 5 articles for Salon and they're all the exact same thing.
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@alongerlook My college roommate used to call his family in Pakistan early in the AM: UrduUrduUrduWEEKENDUrduUrduUrduEMAIL. It was awesome.This is a real image. Of a Windows 10 update. Popping up during a Weather Forecast......................
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWait; coke & meth penalties lighten but pot penalties INCREASE?
Retweeted by Fred Beukema
Lyin’-to-himself Ted, amirite?Hey, @ItsTheBrandi, is the House Judiciary run by Pluggers? (Via @chip_esq & @section_sign) @jbouie he asked a victim's brother for a letter of support
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI don't think I have the language to fully describe how unreal this is.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaDespite this, prominent Republicans have rallied to his defense, as if his being a colleague means he's not a moral monster.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaVoted to impeach Bill Clinton for lying about a consensual affair with an adult.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaLongest serving Republican Speaker of the House in American history.
Retweeted by Fred Beukemayou can see the exact point where that woman reconsiders her vote after he says "basketball ring"
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWe finally have a name for our Election Show! Presenting - Lady and the Trump. Get tickets @
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We've all become so accustomed to his presence that it's worth saying that it is straight insane that Donald Trump will be the GOP nominee.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @MyLittleBloggie piggyback in and steal laptops. Also, roof leaks. 3/3. @MyLittleBloggie so they constantly have to cross out into public skyway to move within their office, and randos frequently 2/ @MyLittleBloggie Maybe! Childhood buddy works at Cray, tells me big problem was their space at the plaza is four non contiguous chunks, 1/ @GhostEsq @miraphorism
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @MyLittleBloggie In this case it was entirely the downtown in question not having enough / suitable space. @tvoti Monica Belucci and Jim Belushi, MEANINGLESS?! @thatlevi @Target #americanhero 🇺🇸 🚽 🇺🇸 @OKBJGM Man, there were like 12 diff Old EU DS1 plan origins kludged together. Happy for Rogue 1 to wipe the slate. But Bothans, please! @OKBJGM Different Death Star, but I get your point. One of the few things I ask of Disney's SW films is a canon Bothan. @thatlevi Multitask! When I ran into you on Sunday @Target, you were doing both!Bwahahagahaha. Foolish., watching my fiancee work and prep for her classroom, is insane.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @jbouie People think of teaching as a calling rather than a profession which instills the idea that they should be very self sacrificing.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI'd love to see a firm survey Americans on whether they think teachers should earn a middle-class salary.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaA shocking (to me) number of people believe that, in fact, teachers have taken a vow of poverty.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @section_sign Hell, she wouldn't be my pick, but he could even mention Gillebrand. @section_sign Maybe he should ask her fellow Massachussetsan (?) for a binder or two.This alone should disqualify Sanders. WARREN IS MOST VALUABLE WHERE SHE IS. fall @TCM & @Criterion are teaming up to launch #FilmStruck, an arthouse film lover's dream streaming service.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWife: How's Steph? Me: Not good. Hurt his knee, could be out a while Wife: Blank stare Me: What? Wife: I was talking about our daughter
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaNaturally, what we need to do with a $900 million budget surplus is squeeze public education.
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Cc: @section_sign am Show X. I am tonight. Get in here. 8pm. @hugetheater.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaAfter a decade together, Eames and Dr. Claw seem to finally be giving friendship a try. @theseantcollins Also, do the Lost Highway alums play their old characters, given Lynch has said the movie occupies the same universe? @theseantcollins Pretty sure Jim Belushi and Monica Bellucci are just in it to provide a rhyme in Animaniacs' "Twin Peaks Cast List Song" @anildash Mainline Maine Dems (Maineline?) and lefties need to get their shit together. @SamuelAAdams @theseantcollins Most every Great House has a named bat, passed down through the generations.Prince: dressed like Dorne, lived in Winterfell.
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this episode was the show looking at a frustrating book subplot and deciding to stab it in the face
Retweeted by Fred Beukemaone time ever.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaIf Only Once, It Would Be Nice If Hodor Said ‘Women’s Rights’
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @TheCurrent Enjoying the Prince remembrance. One correction: Tipper Gore formed the PMRC 8ish years before she was 2nd Lady.Cervantes and Shakespeare both died on this day 400 years ago, causing 1616 Twitter to declare "ugh ugh ugh this year" and "fuck 1616."
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @ItsTheBrandi SSD iPod Classic… mmmmmm… salient.
@ItsTheBrandi I have no idea what I’m going to do when mine dies. @anildash (for what it’s worth, I see this as a crummy double standard) @anildash General public didn’t see themselves as stakeholders in those he cheated on.From Steve Welch, the editor of New Girl, the party playlist Prince made for his appearance on the show.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI'm trying to imagine how Eighties me would have reacted to this screen grab
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @johnmoe So part two of the podcast maybe? Thanks, I’ll check.Congrats, you've made a Batman/Superman/Wonder Woman movie kids can't see and adults can't stand. Imagine fucking up a sure thing that badly
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThe part of you that cares too goddamn much is the center of everything awake & alive & beautiful inside of you. Don't snuff it out.
Retweeted by Fred Beukemaelizabeth warren is great at what she does will change lives of MILLIONS from the senate. liberals: lets remove her! come on.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @johnmoe It was already my favorite of your McSweeny’s work; did the live perf. of the ornithological soc. letter to Prince make it online? @anildash It’s my understanding (verification needed) that his parents’ separation is what brought him from N side down to central. @jbouie And seems confused about the word neoliberalism. @jbouie He also seems to think you’re years older than you actually are?This is the one.
“See, I did not know that. What if I was just telling people I was eating eggplant?” -MelissaMy friend works at the University of North Carolina, someone put these on all the toilets in their building
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @theseantcollins Even the powerhouse classic rock station here in Minneapolis hasn’t traditionally played Prince. @aric The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill Vs Came Down A Mountain #changeANDtoVS @MyLittleBloggie Being named in a song title is an automatic pass. Much else is non sequitur.Corporate messaging done right.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaPrince dies and we end up feeling good about each other. That's some heavy magic.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaPrince didn't do "We Are the World" because the song sucked and because he was shy, the two perfect Minnesota weirdo genius reasons
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Retweeted by Fred Beukema @MyLittleBloggie I’m so sorry for your loss. Hope you’re able to connect with others who knew her and reminisce.It is a sad day for Minneapolis, and everyone is sharing their stories about Prince. Did you know that he used to...
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaSaints keeping it simple, I see.'s a shame that classic rock radio's racism has kept it from embracing Prince. "Purple Rain" is a "Comfortably Numb 2" waiting to happen.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaUniversity United Methodist Church gets it.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaOne August 7, 1982, Prince recorded both 1999 and Little Red Corvette, playing almost all the instruments on both. That was *one day*.
Retweeted by Fred Beukemaprince's passing is such a singular event that MTV actually started playing music videos again
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @anildash You gotta come out to Minneapolis sometime. I still want to read your I94/Mpls Sound treatise.Hey, @MayorHodges, @CityMinneapolis: #PrinceMural.RIP Prince, who made a song so sexy they had to invent an entire thing to warn parents about sexy songs
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @Lummy78 Come on now.And now we pause our political transgender bathroom panic to remember a gender-bending artist who everybody loved.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaPrince made contemporary Minneapolis. Completely changed how we see and think of ourselves, and how the world sees us.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWe skipped parties thrown by PRINCE at PAISLEY F'ING PARK because we figured there was time. You don't know if there's time! Live and love.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaPrince had parties at Paisley Park that were open to the public. Jill and I wanted to go but put it off. "We'll go ther next one."
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI am #transformed
Retweeted by Fred Beukema