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Fred Beukema @beukema Minneapolis, MN

Struct Eng, Improv, husband/dad. || You may think that you crave true love, but it is not a game for cowards. Neither is Scrabble. - Onion horoscopes

200 Following   490 Followers   10,704 Tweets

Joined Twitter 5/3/09

Call only if these are your legislators. leave the lines free for their constituents.
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@chrislhayes First mention on twitter
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @thorazos @theseantcollins Eat your heart out, Stig Larsson.Trump wants to give a "one-time" tax amnesty to corporations with trillions in earnings abroad. Let's look at what…
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWe're very close to killing Zombie Trumpcare. Today/tomorrow are absolutely pivotal. Your calls are working. LEAVE…
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI am 1000% fully rooting for Tillerson, Trump, et al to handle this deftly.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThe Miss Twin Peaks pageant. I'm just now realizing that all the contestants are wrapped in plastic. Seems in poor…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @PokemonGoApp North American Mr. Mime.Can we shift some of the Chelsea Clinton energy into Mark Zuckerberg, y’all?the subtext of a lot of dystopian fiction is "what if white people were as oppressed as non-white people?"
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaUnless you're a member of congress, apparently. Because don't expect THEM to live with what they're providing the r…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @OnanRulz Ms. Dynamite, The Cardigans, Honeyhoney, Blondie, Fleetwood Mac, Courtney Barnett, Janelle Monae, Dessa,… # for Trump's hotline to report "criminal aliens" is 855-48-VOICE Please do not call this number to describe plots of X-Files episodes.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaWhy I cancelled my @nytimes subscription. @BretStephensNYT
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaTRUMPCARE UPDATE: They do not have the votes right now. Meeting at 5 to decide whether to vote this week. Need TIDAL WAVE OF CALLS. (pls RT)
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaConfession: for most of high school I thought TLC was singing advice to a young protagonist named Jason Waterfalls.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @chrislhayes Once upon a time, I thought this was Samantha Power. I was wrong.I made a font quiz that was really just an excuse to put lyrics from 90s alt-rock songs on BF…
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThe closing of Bebe is a major loss for those "Adriana La Cerva at a medium price point" lewks
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaSorry
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @alongerlook Were there bubbles of various size floating up past your head?
Good for her. Glad Delmonico facing some repercussions for his Pointergate garbage. @TheBullsShow @chrislhayes Jordan Flu Game diarrhea or the regular kind?Trumps’ “VOICE” Hotline set up for people to report on crime from illegal aliens was reportedly overloaded with calls about space aliens
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaHere are the ~30 "moderates" we need to lock down against Zombie Trumpcare. They're making up their minds now. CALL…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @RobinKimball Der edgenfiren.Ryan's "postcard" tax form has same number of lines (14) as current 1040-EZ. So his brilliant tax reform idea is a…
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaHEY WESTERN TWIN CITIES SUBURBAN FRIENDS, come get your boy (again)!
Retweeted by Fred Beukema"Oh, oh. You wanted a *book*. Well this is what the book will be. It's the same, basically. Just, like, imagine thi…
Retweeted by Fred Beukemathis will ruin millions of lives for multiple generations
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThis will be a catastrophe for so many non-wealthy people. a deduction for paying interest on my student loans is one of my only joys every tax season
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaFate of AHCA in the house now rests w 23 reps from districts HRC won, where #resistance activism has greatest chance to have an effect.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaTo the phones, constituents of moderate Republucans!🙄
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaImagine having the tools, skills & time to build this and making a barrier instead of helping build homes.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema
My 2yo said she is a grown up. I told her she isn't, that she is a toddler. She replied, "No, I'm a grown up. I'm going to touch knives."
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaSo, I'm still mad about this weekend's @blueapron bullshit. Here are a few more than 140 characters about it.
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @johnmoe And it’s our second Daily Double! @jbouie Back when he wore suits that fit.I know I'm exhausted because this made me tear up sitting in an airport
Retweeted by Fred Beukemaoh wow, I didn't know Will Smith was still rapping, or that he did the credits rap for Arrival. wonder why this did…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @jbouie Is there an earlier example than Bobby Brown's synopsis of Ghostbusters II in "On Our Own"? @ItsTheBrandi I'm not seeing "Heat Death of Universe" on here. What's with that? @nycsouthpaw @chrislhayes Dollars to donuts 45 forgot about it. @section_sign I, too, have gamed this out. @section_sign Genuinely surprised there isn't more Confederate Flag burning. @SeanTrende @jackshafer @tucker_doherty Yes. True of racial diversity as well! Lot of media coverage that would be… that the Mpls street washer caught up to the cat before the cat caught up to the baby bunny.You know that Ferris Bueller song that goes "ohhhh yeahhhh" and then there's the part at the end that goes like
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaB-But, heritage not hate, right? one’s time accurately, $30 ought to get you through the initial conversation. @ItsTheBrandi 😬Can we also remove the Confederate monument that’s currently serving as Attorney General?
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @ItsTheBrandi Where are you in it?I'd call Stewart a carpetbagger but the slanders the good name of honest Northerners who came after the war to help rebuild the South.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaI grew up in VA around lots of kids who flew the stars & bars and will never understand Stewart types who come from up North & adopt it.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaClearly this guy’s fixing to give the battle flag back. No dice.
Late breaking news. @anildash (cc: @vivekvenugopal )They’re pitching softballs tonight. Aquaman's trident 5 points instead of 3—making it more Xtreme but NOT A TRIDENT—sums up Zack Snyder's DC Cin…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema @section_sign I’d consider that putting the work and time in by any means. @section_sign I mean, if that’s what she’s going for, no problem. @section_sign I’m a bigger HRC fan than most, but I see the point. @section_sign Nepotistic dynasty. Her roles thus far have been largely ceremonial / based on her name. The knock is she’s Luke Russert. @SenateDems @rsimr11 @realDonaldTrump Well, and because it’s a terrible, wasteful idea. Let’s not forget that.I'm tonight.
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaThe Times piece has been sitting less well as day goes on. Need to give it some more time & a closer read. @retronauts To be clear: we're talking TI desktop computers, not mid-90s hacks of graphing calculators. @anildash Listening to Prince coverage this weekend, wondered what's become of charitable giving under estate's control. Has it continued?Bwa hahahahahahahaaaaahahahaghahwhsjsgaga @WaukeshaGOP @CNNPolitics BwahahahahahahaagahaLRT: a persuasive argument, presented in a manner I expect to adopt going forward.This is faaaaantastic
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@ItsTheBrandi Oh. Oh, no.Can't shake the devil's hand & say you're only kidding. - @tmbg
Retweeted by Fred BeukemaGloriously dumb. had Trump with a 34% chance when you wrote a column saying that Clinton *might* lose. I'm sorry you don't get ho…
Retweeted by Fred Beukema