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Accepting that I'm more of a nerd than I thought, one piece of technology at a time.

278 Following   87,390 Followers   56,864 Tweets

Joined Twitter 7/24/11

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🎶Big dog on a tiny couch🎶 love for this is unreasonable.
This face, @wilw. LOOK AT THIS FACE. It does!PUPDATE: Lucy is adorable and huge.'s here and full of advice for dogs (and cats). #GuideToBeingADog #SeamusWheaton @annewheaton @wilw…
Retweeted by Anne Witchon@doolbneerg I shipped your book a couple of days ago. There's a donation letter inside it with tax ID #!Guess who greeted me at the door when I arrived at my friend's house? LUCY!! SO MANY KISSES. HELLS YES!@cyclingJ Meow.@JamesBenEmery ;-)@geekfitgirl HAHAHA! Woops.@geekfitgirl For my best friend's niece's wedding? Uh, thanks?@Geekdomo @verified I've never tried because no one is trying to pretend to be me. Meow.If you aren't @verified on Twitter, everyone assumes you're just a cat on the internet. Meow.SACRAMENTO I AM IN YOU! *oontz oontz oontz*@JacobCampbell46 It makes the whole seat row bounce and the constant movement in eyesight is distracting when trying to look down at my bookOf all the seats on this airplane, I chose the seat next to bouncing leg guy. Super.FUUUuuuuu..... I guess it's good to prepared?@xeni Death Star by chocolate.@xeni @wilw Whoa, COOL!@TheBloggess You're in the Burbank airport newsstand! Oddly next to Bill O'Reilly, but who am I to judge. security reminded passengers no liquids over 3 oz in bags, so the man in front of me left his on the counter; a tube of k-y jelly.@AthensNewbie SO TINY!Late to bed, early to rise, is who I thank for the bags under my eyes. #girlytweet
@lunatyc Leaving early tomorrow morning. :-)@MrJamesBrown HA!@e2thej @hijinksensue made it for me!Two weddings in two different states in one weekend. I'm exhausted just thinking about it, yet here I am packing for it. Lordy on fire.What I should be doing is packing my suitcase. What I'm doing instead is lounging around with this little ham. @GeekGirlAuth Yay!!
@Joi_the_Artist SO MUCH FLOOF!@AshleyEsqueda Mm....autocorrect...@AshleyEsqueda It's so stinking' cute.@kmcgivney Pretty sure you guys need to come visit and meet her.All night with this ball of fluff.'s new wage gap law gives women the strongest equal-pay protection in the nation
Retweeted by Anne Witchon@RedPenOfDoom @KaylaCagan OH MY GOD YAY!!!!!!@tarastrong @TheMuppetsABC WHAT.@hollyamos22 SO GOOD.The 2 kids running around, barking like dogs, and jumping up and down sure is fun for a park. Sadly, it's next to me in a restaurant.@Boursin ME TOO.Confession: I have no idea how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. I only chew them. I thought you should know that.Confession: I have no idea what "tl;dr" and I have no desire or plan to ever Google it to find out. I thought you should know that.Confession: When I was a kid, I'd sing "Whoa whoa whoa, my butt's on fire" to that Bruce Springsteen song. I thought you should know that.@TheTalena @wilw Woops.Don't get me wrong. Your kiss is definitely on my list of the best things in life. But so is peanut butter, tropical vacations, and dogs.Seamus left his pawtograph ink pad open and Eliot found it. In the first 200, it looked like he did about 10 total. Rotten boy. 😉🐾@AnneWheaton Seamus did his pawtograph on totally random books. He has no idea who they went to!Seamus thought it would be fun to surprise a couple of foreign and domestic book orders w/his pawtograph. 😉 Heehee....@dmharada Yay!!@Snagglefoot Hooray!!Burgers, beers, books, and my blog. Woohoo! "Here We Go!" Pretty!
@tiffanyreisz @limperone HAHA!@kimberlyannefl Oh, man. This just got real awkward.That awkward moment when you show up at a party wearing the same outfit. Yay! Thank you!@ItsameDelainey @wilw SWEET.@LyssaPearl Yummy!@BigNiceJohn So good. 👍😉Need cups? doom. do you call a flatbread bakery in India that passes health and safety regulations? Naan compliant.@KleoTheCat @Pawfleet Heehee...Happy Monday! SWEET.@HardcoreLemur @wilw YASSSS.@cmpriest The giant divot in Eliot's fur when she got spayed 2 weeks ago looks pretty silly from the side.@cmpriest Dat bellyWhy yes, autocorrect. I did actually mean protect the wound with an ancient civilization, not an antibiotic ointment.
HAHAHAHA!! bet the "um..actually" people who try to explain how your days old joke doesn't work are super fun at parties.@Tuplet Because those teeth you're currently brushing won't be the same teeth that sit in your skeleton after everything is gone? No tomato.@Tuplet Yet every skeleton has teeth which is what I was referring to.@Tuplet A skeleton has all teeth and no skin. I'm not sure how you're confusing this.@Tuplet @xpatriciah Who said anything about teeth being bones? I'm talking about a skeleton, and when you see a skeleton, teeth are on it.@AnneWheaton What were they; Gripe Nuts?
Retweeted by Anne WitchonYour responses to cereal returning lady are hilarious. See? That is why you are my people. ❤️I love her reason for returning the cereal. "It says 'Mom's favorite cereal' on the box. Should've tried it before buying 4 boxes. GROSS."I even went to the grocery store for ONE THING and got behind a woman returning four boxes of cereal. The hell.I hit every construction traffic jam detour imaginable when I went out to run errands. Obviously a sign I should've stayed in bed today.@BlurryMonster Yep.One would hope a person would take a serious look at just how awful they are that a giant country is all "No way, dude. VISA DENIED."@kirstyhannam Thanks! @hijinksensue made it for me.@baybridget Right?!Coffee disaster followed by my cat puking and my dogs racing in to eat it. I should probably go back to bed.Put grounds & water in coffee maker, checked email, went to pour coffee, pot was empty. I never turned it on. I need coffee to make coffee.@MsCynMet She's a calico/tabby mix and doesn't shed at all. She hunts the flies as much as our older tuxedo cat does. :-)You've got to be a special kind of rotten to say such epic lies that you piss off the Vatican enough to issue a statement about you. Yeesh.@TheDragernox This isn't a one time thing. We will always have a supply of them for other occasions. Unlimited printing option!
@SamSykesSwears I think I've had other beers from them before. I'll see if I can find that one. Thanks! 🍻There is one fly that's been in our house for days fucking with us. If you look closely, his wings are actually tiny middle finger gestures.@SamSykesSwears I've never tried pumpkin porter. Do you have any good recommendations?@LunaWheaton Oh, I know. That box was barely empty before you launched into it. It's yours alright."I am going to get that fly. Mark my words. That fly is mine."
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