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Actor / Writer / Filmmaker / Blogger / Comedian / Critic / Gamer / Mad Scientist

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Join Twitter 3/19/09

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Literally tightie whities. It's weird enough having two oiled guys rolling around, but having it just LOOK like Fruit of the Looms? No.Ugh Cody. PROTIP for any aspiring pro wrestlers out there: never wrestle in white tights. It looks like you're wrestling in your underpants.Cole saying someone has an "unconventional style" is the same code as JR saying a match "won't be a technical showcase." #BowlingShoeUglyAaaaand now it's the Miz vs. Brodus Clay. Miz asserts he's a better dancer and has begun doing the Thriller to his own music. Kill me.RT @OscarG_Garcia @TheSpoonyOne Your spanish needs some polishing :p // Aw c'mon that was close en-- **EL DIAMOND CUTTER**Él es... ALBERTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..... Oh wait, Sheamus is champion going into this. Uh. SHEAMOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUSSS...¡Damas y caballeros! Aquí es mi honor de presentar la esencia de excelencia, el campeón mundial del WWE y el orgullo de la gente de México..Layla drops in agony. Beth goes for the Glam Slam, and then Layla just decides to stop selling and hits a neckbreaker for the win.The FU-- Beth works the injured knee the whole match. Beth slips out of Layla's finisher, KICKS the knee out.Beth Phoenix and Layla are calling their spots so loudly they might as well just have a debate for the Divas title.Watching Over the Limit 2012 while I work. Show opens with Kofi & R-Truth (c) vs ~/o I'M HERE TO JOB SOME MORE I'M HERE TO JOB SOME MORE ~/oIt's simple, #YouKilledTheBatman! http://t.co/Jf1uIzUeP5@MinisterWighty Young fool... only now at the end do you understand...Edgar Wright confirmed to direct Great Lakes Avengers in 2017: http://t.co/I5khZNhajy@Maffewgregg I said NO camels, that's THREE camels.RT @godzillaexpert @TheSpoonyOne http://t.co/fHRBU5ybUe // Optimus Prime would never put HHH over.Tyson Kidd is too awesome for this company. #ASKHIM #ASKHIMinIRISHYES!!! A nickelodeon-style Vaudevillain promo complete with a training montage and Simon Gotch CRANE KICKING A FUCKING BEAR.The commentators are openly burying the Lucha Dragons for basically shambling through this match.And now it's Carmella vs. Blue Pants, the last survivor from Vault 13. #SAWFT Blue Pants has a much better gimmick.There is a guy doing a gimmick where he lost a hair vs. hair match, but apparently somehow ALL HIS HAIR IS GONE NOW AND I MEAN ALL OF IT.And now, #NXT. This episode kicks off with Tyler "Most Generic Heel Gimmick In History" Breeze vs. Oh My God What the Shit Is ThisWell yes. Which is all I need for approval from the American Psychological Association, I figure.@TheSpoonyOne only if you're looking at purely results based sociological theory and ignore any other effects/people involved.
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerNow he's a much more good-natured person who stands up against bullies. So... Bray Wyatt's cult is perfectly valid treatment.Just had a thought... Erick Rowan is in Bray Wyatt's cult for years until Bray finally deems him "fixed" and free to go out on his own.Ben Grimm takes one look at Civil War and says "Fuck this shit. I'm going to Canada." #ItIsNOTclobberinTime http://t.co/KGvhbuXNqHPeasant: Ohohoho! I daresay this Spoony bard spins the silliest tales! My boys love to come and listen!@TheSpoonyOne "I was battling ancient evils with my companions and my hoe before you were even born! ...What? No! My hoe of destruction!"
Retweeted by Noah Antwiler"I will not be NOT be mocked! I am the Avatar! Thou wouldst all be so much seahorse food now, had I not exterminated them!" "Hahahaha!"@GaminGlennSeto @RichardGarriott "Full of jesters it was, the whole town. How they got into space I'll never- no, I'm serious. Wh-- it was!"@S_Picazo @RichardGarriott In this world he's more an embittered bard, telling tales of his wild exploits, but confused when people laugh.@TheSpoonyOne @RichardGarriott there must "spoony avatar" a guy who does heroic things, insists is the vatar, but no one believes him
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerSo @RichardGarriott, when can I start recording some epic voice-over work for Shroud of the Avatar and get myself an in-game flying carpet?(Sorry, long night already. Forgot to draw the L and R on my hands.)RT @GaminGlennSeto @TheSpoonyOne Nono, Kitty (on the right) totally looks like she's holding in a really nasty fart. // That's Karma!!!RT @GaminGlennSeto @TheSpoonyOne And what the hell is wrong with Kitty's face?! // That is DAZZLER. And she has the SAME FACE AS EMMA.EMMA'S PANTS ARE SO LOW, I CAN SEE HER CLIT WHERE SHE STANDS. #EVOLUTION http://t.co/EEeLAiSCAsCOPY PASTE PORN STAR FACE, TRACED BY HAND http://t.co/N181riDvHV
I SEE THE LINES BY GREG LAND http://t.co/lhHvJBGflF#EVOLUTION IS A MYSTERY http://t.co/n1kuplLujNOh come on, @TheSpoonyOne and @Linkara19 can't we just get Beyond Thunderdome? #MST3K http://t.co/7PYJxuH8yP
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerRT @RahiTwoCents Once again @TheSpoonyOne was right about CM Punk dude was in PAIN!! // Right? Again?Ugh, @Steam_Support should add a feature allowing me to block recommendations from curators I wouldn't piss on if their balls were on fire.Hrm. Don't Starve is on sale. Hrm. I mustn't. Steam sale is treacherous. It's a slippery slope leading to procrastination.#DOOM knows when it's time to cut his losses and enact his vengeance another day. #HeMightBeMean http://t.co/kTZRyM4PVDI HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD GREEN POWER RINGS ARE MY NEW FRIENDS #TheyTalkToMe http://t.co/U1yDPuP7HS...Daredevil, Iron Fist, the Thing, and Mockingbird... THE AVENGERS! http://t.co/YSL2WaO9zlHis opponents: the team of Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hawkeye, the Red Hulk, Black Widow, Captain Marvel, Spider-Man, Spider-Woman...The following is a 14-on-1 handicap DEATHMATCH! Introducing first from Philadelphia, PA... DOCTOR STRANGE! http://t.co/zSjlF10S1D
Honestly, his willingness to endure this harassment and abuse is inspiring. He's rising above hate more than Cena ever has.So far the only one who's been outright mistreated and outrageously disrespected here is Rusev. How many flags has he ripped down?So the correct answer is to sink beneath their level. #NotYourHammerAndSickle@TheSpoonyOne the Putin worship, the references to the airliner shot down over Ukraine. The gimmick is "these guys are the worst of Russia."
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerRT @AGeekShow Russia's a cesspool of human rights abuses. No sympathy for them on Raw. // And that's Rusev's fault? #NotAllRussiansYOU'RE GOD DAMN RIGHT I DID!!After watching @TheSpoonyOne 's Survivor Series W!W, the guy actually made fucking sense. Seriously people grow up #SpoonyOne
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerOh jeez. Seriously? There's people who don't realize that I wasn't actually yelling at you in the W!W video. That was a Code Red, idiots."Triple H has handcuffed Roman Reigns to the rope!! Seth Rollins is cashing in his briefcase! NOT THIS WAY!!" "IT'S STING! AND ROBOCOP!!"I don't book Sting for SHIT at Wrestlemania unless it involves Robocop.Wrestle! Wrestle! Survivor Series 2014 http://t.co/PC5Z6BWbmd #DeshiBasaraSOONRT @PushinUpRoses What a let down of a night. // The weekly mantra of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. fans.
@TheSpoonyOne 94? But he didn't even have the crow gimmick unti- OH, haha, very funny.
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerIt was, wasn't it. *puts mic on table and goes to bed*RT @JetstreamRev @TheSpoonyOne He was not AWFUL in TNA. And the Joker gimmick was over with the fans. // Yeah. Yeah. It was.RT @Vcom7418 @TheSpoonyOne Seriously, he was THAT awful in TNA?! // http://t.co/PRXOXUVRAx #WhySoSeriousRT @Vcom7418 @TheSpoonyOne Opinions dear Spoony. It's all about opinions. // And the kind of people who never check expiration dates.Was. Was cool. In 1994.@MaxwellElvis @TheSpoonyOne Also, blinded? Why can't they just appreciate the novelty? The Crow is fucking cool and so is Sting.
Retweeted by Noah Antwiler@Benzaie_tgwtg @FrancoisTheurel LE HELICOPTER DICKSOMEBODY GON GET DEY ASS KICKED #WeKillTheKringle http://t.co/yv1yVsBA69I am telling you RIGHT NOW, @WWE, if you're hoping to sell Network subscriptions, bringing back the anonymous Raw GM will END YOU.HOW IN THE HELL DID LAWLER MISS THE SEVEN-FOOT-TALL PODIUM BEING SET UP AT RINGSIDE?
NOT THE FUCKING LAPTOP GOD DAMN YOU #WWE GOD DAMN YOUNO NOT THE LAPTOPBradshaw is absolutely out of his mind on commentary. He's rambled for about ten minutes that Noble & Mercury were trained by Seal Team Six.Noble & Mercury didn't get dressed in any kind of ring gear for this match? Even though winning the poll was a near-certainty?These Larry the Cable Guy segments are the most torturous slices of Hell I've had to sit through this year. #Raw @WWEThat was his babyface turn, dude.@TheSpoonyOne @WWE . . Didn't Rusev, like, put Zeb Coulter into the hospital after kicking the elderly man in the head?
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerThis bullshit with Rusev and a frightened woman being bullied into saying the Pledge of Allegiance is sickening. #WWE @WWE #BeAStarA (supposed) Marine being "restrained" by ONE security guard. A Marine vs. Part-Time Arena Security Guard? I don't like his odds.@TheSpoonyOne 1, Veteran was being restrained by security. 2. Rusev, if feeling threatened had ample time to leave. 3. He isn't security. .
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerApparently Bray Wyatt isn't suffering any lasting harm from being savagely beaten with a chair and put through a table 24 hours ago.The so-called "veteran" jumped the ring and had it coming. I've seen fans get half as far and legit get nailed twice as hard.@TheSpoonyOne Oh for the love of, I can't even. . . He's a guy who attacks veterans, weakened wrestlers, and insults basically everyone. . .
Retweeted by Noah AntwilerGod DAMN, Luke Harper and Dean Ambrose are beating the SHIT out of each other.Rusev gets forced to choose between a completely unfair match or to shame himself saying the Pledge of Allegiance. His crime: being Russian.HHH just gave the entire maniacal rant from A Few Good Men #YouHaveThatLuxury #WhosGonnaDoIt #You #YouLieutenantWeinbergRT @WWElivereact "The Ryback" Bryan must be a @TheSpoonyOne fan #WWE #RAW // The Vaudevillains are! Classy gentlemen and peerless athletes!RT @Duffy6Brett @TheSpoonyOne @Maffewgregg Will you two just do it already? // I prefer my low standards with a little meat on their bones.@Maffewgregg Forgiving is the wrong word. Stockholm Syndrome.I really don't need the headache of being called all this hateful bullshit over a fucking wrestling show.*sigh* On second thought, I think I'll skip doing a recap video this time around. Apparently Sting fans are fucking militant.What's going to be the best part of all this is how quickly they relegate Dolph back to being a complete joke, losing twice every week.@ZeSadPanda @Welshy_Who More like an entirely too-forgiving fan who's mistaking a ridiculous number of near-falls for drama.I'll do a WrestleWrestle tonight after Raw to recap both shows.@DoctorOddfellow That's lovely. Thanks for that.My point is, nobody gets fired. This isn't hard. You're turning someone heel. Okay. So Show loses and just goes crawling back to HHH. There.