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Comedian, talk show host and ice road trucker. My tweets are real, and they’re spectacular.

35,894 Following   77,312,115 Followers   16,374 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/14/08

Michelle and I are so inspired by all the young people who made today’s marches happen. Keep at it. You’re leading…
Retweeted by Ellen DeGeneresWatching everyone marching and speaking up is so inspiring, and so powerful. Keep going. You're changing the world. #MarchForOurLives
Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone donating to @EDWildlifeFund. I'm reading your stories and each one mean…'m so proud of San Francisco. Let's all go next weekend. are so many wonderful GIFs to be grateful for. Thank goodness it’s Thank GIF It’s Friday. #TGIF told me about getting surprisingly naked in his new movie. couldn’t be more grateful to @BradPaisley for putting together this concert. I hope you can make it. Promo Code:… sent Jillian to get some things for me from @Walmart, but the truth is, she was there to get something for hersel… @JohnCena No one's ever made a handsomer awkward prom photo.Getting to talk to Sigourney Weaver about gorillas was a dream come true for me. @EDWildlifeFund and @RaeSremmurd just brought the house down. birthday to the real Chef Curry. @AyeshaCurryKaylee is on #LittleBigShots with Pentatonix this Sunday at 8/7c on @NBC. Hallelujah! @PTXofficial didn’t get to go to prom... that is, until today.
.@EllenPompeo’s new #GreysAnatomy spinoff #Station19 premieres tonight 9|8c on ABC. I don’t know about you, but I’m… gorillas. Get a great t-shirt. Look and feel amazing. #WeNeedGorillas @EDWildlifeFund @peta ❤️I wish I could have these two on my show 8 days a week. kids from Marjory Stoneman Douglas see a need for change in our world, and they’re doing something about it.… birthday, @RWitherspoon! We go way back together. has some bold opinions. Like seriously. had some impactful words about women in the workplace. I really loved this interview.
Are you ready for my new show, #SplittingUpTogether? It premieres this Tuesday! @GDeLaurentiis Hey, sign my name too! @Camila_Cabello I’m so sorry. It never rains in L.A. Clearly someone forgot to close your dressing room skylight.I love watching Jeannie surprise amazing people. This episode of Life’s First-Evers is incredible. #FirstEver Kunis and Kate McKinnon playing "Speak Out" is more than I can handle. you have a big event, and you need to learn a dance for it? How’d ya like a dance lesson from @official_tWitch?’m gonna need you to make time to watch @Camila_Cabello perform her new hit, #NeverBeTheSame. can’t wait for you to see #SplittingUpTogether. The stars, @JennaFischer and @theOliverHudson, are here today! #SpyWhoDumpedMe opens this summer, and here’s an exclusive peek at it! Mila Kunis and Kate McKinnon, you’re hil…
.@SplittingUpABC premieres in one week! I haven’t been this excited to watch a couple break up on national televisi… don’t think anyone gets a warmer welcome on my show than @iamJohnOliver. played tag with the cast of #TagMovie! Here are their tags. @Renner4Real @MrJakeJohnson @edhelms @hannibalburess was my guest DJ and I gave him a Christian Cowan suit. @iamJohnOliver saving the world? I say yes. last male northern white rhino has left the earth. We need to protect endangered species before they disappear.… Gold medalists @TessaVirtue and @ScottMoir are here. Are they a couple? Are they not? I asked. I asked twi… @tessavirtue @ScottMoir You two look great together. Have you considered dating?It’s the #FirstDayOfSpring! Or as we say in Los Angeles, it’s the First Day of Third Summer.I love this. You’re gonna love this. @TagtheMovie #ThanksSponsor
@LastWeekTonight @iamjohnoliver @LateNightSeth This might be my favorite children’s book ever.Resting on the shoulders of giants. is here with her Oscar, and finally gave me the thank you I deserve. asked my audience about their #SpringBreak regrets. Then we got to hear a story about a face rug burn. season of #LittleBigShots is absolutely hilarious. @AllisonBJanney Thanks for bringing your Oscar. Not gonna lie, I feel a little bad about taking it from you.Listening to Zach Woods from #SiliconValley talk about trying to get in shape might be my favorite thing all week,… played a game with @AllisonBJanney about how competitive we are. I won.
West Coast! It’s your turn to watch the premiere of #LittleBigShots. Tune in now! Go! @NBCLilBigShotsAngelica Hale is absolutely, unquestionably incredible. #LittleBigShots starts now! Hurry, you don’t wanna miss any little big shots.I don’t think you can get more adorable then this. I’d do what she says. @SophieFatu #LittleBigShots birthday, @AdamLevine. And congratulations on your new baby. I love the name. It’s the most unusual spelling of “Ellen.” @RobLowe ❤️#LittleBigShots Season 3 premieres tonight! Get your little big shot to set your DVR.
The Kiriku brothers are about to blow your mind. Don’t miss #LittleBigShots tomorrow at 7/6c on @NBC! birthday, @RobLowe! I love you and everything you’re doing for our community of Montecito.This is incredible! Thank you @shaye_1997 it means the world to me. #WeNeedGorillas @EDWildlifeFund you so much @lunaamore14. I'm so grateful and so are the gorillas. #WeNeedGorillas @EDWildlifeFund o' morning to you! I hope everyone has a lucky day. #StPatricksDay
.@itsCathyNC, you're my all-time favorite person in the world right in this moment. you can follow the @EDWildlifeFund on Twitter! If you make a donation, let me know. I'd love to give you a shou… is who we need to save. Who’s with me? #WeNeedGorillas @EDWildlifeFund birthday, @theLaurenGraham! I hope everything’s great in Stars Hollow.If you’re a millennial feeling stressed out about life, this monologue is for you. GIF it’s Friday. #TGIF little girl is adorable at a professional level. @sophiefatu #LittleBigShots Garner tries to explain what happened at the #Oscars. is back this Sunday at 7/6c on NBC! And I’ve got one of the littlest biggest shots on my show today…
I know there’s so much going on in the world right now. Everyone has a lot on their plate. Every donation I see to… @michaelstrahan ❤️If you haven’t seen this yet, I don’t understand where you’ve been. @SeanHayes #BattleOfTheGays can’t wait for their album to drop. @portugaltheman @USCTMB That’s so sweet. You guys are the man.If you can make a stranger smile, you can win my All Smiles challenge and end up in the @bublywater skybox. Submit… told me about her lip tattoo, and you can watch it right meow. already knows who she wants to win her season of #TheBachelorette. I hope you’re watching, @MichaelStrahan.… asked @KendallJenner when she’s having a baby.