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Comedian, talk show host and ice road trucker. My tweets are real, and they’re spectacular.

36,120 Following   68,614,765 Followers   14,336 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/14/08

Bitches up in the crib. @NICKIMINAJ 🦄👩🏾‍🎤🎤.@RealRobinWright is stunning, strong and talented, and an incredible role model. And now she can kick your booty.… to @NickiMinaj, I'm officially in a rap feud. thought you should have your own emoji, @NickiMinaj. inspired me so much by giving back to her fans, so I had a special surprise for her. spilled the tea on her relationship with Nas. back always fills me with love and hope, and so often it's thanks to @Shutterfly. #LaughDancePartner
Sending you so much love. story is so sad and so scary. Sending all my love to Manchester.I played a new game "Prom Dress or Craigslist Couch?" How many of you could play this at your house right now?… can be stressful. Thankfully, here’s some of my guests with their dating secrets. #LaughDancePartner new friend Tamika was so special, I had two surprises for her. First was her family… is a performer, a designer, a mom, and owns a billion-dollar business. is 8 years old and her hip-hop skills are already off the charts. Monday @TheEllenShow
Retweeted by Ellen DeGeneresI challenged @JessicaSimpson to a game of sumo @HeadsUp! I can't tell if she won or if I lost.…
Happy birthday, Mama!
Sunday is the Billboard Music Awards! Don't just sit there. Go see it for yourself. I'm giving away tickets! #BBMAs and Marie, I think you’ve really got something. I hope you stick with it. #FirstDatesWow, this show is so real. Dating is hard. Keep your head up, Doug. #FirstDatesFor the record, I love people who take selfies, Kyle. #FirstDatesOh, the joys of dating. Luckily, I made it easy for you to watch right from home. #FirstDates is on in an hour!’re hired. 🙂 World’s Most Beautiful (and wonderful) person is here today! mother and daughter accomplished something incredible together. Nothing can stop them now. #LaughDancePartner Roberts went to Kenya to support #RedNoseDay. You can support it right here. friend Julia Roberts has some twin advice for our friend George Clooney.
Someone's asleep on the job. better to help me with a sexy guys round of @HotHands than @NiallOfficial? there's a vacation at stake, my audience will stop at nothing. #LaughDancePartner Depp told me about how Captain Jack Sparrow makes appearances at children’s hospitals. #PiratesLife's new music is here, and you can watch him perform it right now. went deep with Depp. You heard me. Cornell performed on my show in 2015. I'm sending love to his family.
@NiallOfficial We look so good together., how did anything get this fluffy? #EDbypetsmart couple wanted to play, "You Bet Your Wife." You bet your wife they didn't see this coming. #LaughDancePartner moms store family photos in an old drawer. @RWitherspoon's mom stores her nudes on the cloud. do George Clooney, @Rihanna, and my pets have in common? You're about to find out in this episode of #PetDish! isn’t much of a talker, but he sure knows how to dance. played "Speak Out." My apologies to her mother and whatever that horse did to her.…’s a great day to show love to someone who’s different from you. #loveislove
I need this hat. had no idea Putin was such a fan. mom & 9yo daughter had no idea they were gonna be on my show. It only got better from there.… helped @KatyPerry find a husband today. Or two?, the fun we have. asked @KatyPerry if she's gonna be a judge on American Idol. A sip is worth a thousand words.…
It’s true! My very own game show is coming to primetime. Ellen’s #GameofGames is coming soon to NBC!Mother’s Day was yesterday, back to business as usual. love Amy Poehler and Will Ferrell, and would hang out with them any chance I got, even if it means I get punched. is the #HSUSDayofGiving. I can't think of a better day to help the @HumaneSociety end puppy mills."Law and Order: SVU" star @Mariska Hargitay came to tell me about her life. These are her stories.'s still time to donate to @ChildrensLA and earn a chance to win 10 tickets to a 12 Days show. @JimmyKimmel Poehler & Will Ferrell helped turn my set into a casino. And then they gave away The House. #LaughDancePartner and Dave are in one word, irresistible.
@lenadunham 🙂What's got talented kids, a hilarious host, a gorgeous executive producer & is on in 5 minutes? Turn on NBC and find out! #LittleBigShotsSend your mom something special today. And when you realize you forgot & it's too late, at least send her an emoji.… #MothersDay to all the moms out there. As Barbra Streisand would say, people who make people are the luckiest… #MothersDay to all the moms who are doing their best.
Have you downloaded my @EmojiExploji app yet? It's free all weekend. Hurry up! I'm not made of money.…'s mom is a huge fan of @theStevenBauer. I got this just for her. Happy #MothersDay and @AmySchumer had some "motherly advice" for us all. Happy early #MothersDay everyone. birthday, @LenaDunham! It's also Leprechaun Day, Belly Dance Day, and Top Gun Day. Not that I'm telling you how to celebrate.
Something tells me this relationship will live long and prosper. #FirstDatesNo time like a first date to perform an original song about finding a wife. #FirstDatesI’ve never been so anxious to find out if someone eats shrimp. #FirstDatesThat’s a lot of reasons why you should watch #FirstDates. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, tune in to NBC in 10 minutes to watch!Reasons why you should watch #FirstDates tonight: It’s everything you love about "The Bachelor" and half as long.Reasons why you should watch #FirstDates tonight: It’s all the fun of going on a date without having to iron an outfit.I could stare at him all day. I mean talk with him. @PrattPrattPratt why you should watch #FirstDates tonight: It will make you feel like true love still has hope.This is my kind of nap. you play Make It Rain, you either win big bucks or get soaked on national TV. Either way it's a win win.… gave Joe Dombrowski something I have never given to anyone. I don't know where he's gonna put it all.… played Speak Out and nearly got me kicked off daytime television.
The Kosher Dill Dude emoji is here to serve those pregnancy cravings! @AndyLassner