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Feed: life, psychology, mental health, kids, tech, management, good vibes. Me: sweet, earnest dad, #Exvangelical, #CPTSD, 5w4, PhD, he/him. Trying to stay open.

1,460 Following   4,480 Followers   7,595 Tweets

Joined Twitter 2/6/10

Bracing. I experienced every one of these full-tilt. if it's OK for me to be "picky" and like... have preferences?? @alyrae Before I really understood my therapist's approach, I would've been quite interested in this! But now, ever…
@matthewhammer That said, it’s not super systematic for me, and the idea of body OUTLETS for parts, or addressing t… @matthewhammer My therapist helps me remember to tune into my body in session, and I do find that these various par… can't stop cackling about this perfect depiction of Internal Family Systems therapy. @LuBellWoo It makes me SO HAPPY to pass on the benefits of my therapy sessions! @nyplz Whoa!!! I had no idea!Even writing that makes me uncomfortable. Not striving to be better?? Unacceptable!!! And that leads, as all roads… therapist reminded me that I'm always looking for work. The tricky bit is that, to integrate these parts of myse…, I remembered that what I'm doing is NOT trying to make a new Aaron -- NOT trying to just lay down new cond… was very powerful to see and experience the pain I'd caused myself through this disowning, then to experience se…'s session helped me realize that, in pushing to not live like that NOW, I've also pushed away the years that…, though, as I've gotten acclimated into my new life and my new job, there's a whole new set of obligations.… lived for so long a small existence of fulfilling obligations and following rules. I slowly suffocated everything… way to transform is not to run away, but to incorporate. To let those parts of you that seem "bad" still be par… away from yourself -- past experiences, actions, feelings, or thoughts -- is not really possible. You are y… today had different parts of myself in dialogue. Compassion from one part led to realizing how I'd disowne…
Joy takes courage.A confusing thing: I'm trying to get OUT of my head, but at the same time, I often need to get IN to MY head. It t…
Celebrating the fact that my company offers a range of management trainings by signing up for ALL OF THEM. @iximeow 👀Today I am remembering to slow down. I am separate from my obligations. Joy is an essential energy source. @iximeow I need to know what this is subtweeting @lynscottjr There’s a channel on the official Discord specifically for beginners, and has a good reputation as a friendly and helpful spot!TFW the 7yo puts your note in her treasure box.
Tech took me away from people. Ironically, my way back into tech is through and about people.I love seeing people get Rust jobs, especially folks from the community, ESPECIALLY when Rust made the job possible… my dog trips over his own ears and that’s how I know he’s a kindred spirit. @ReinH stigma against crying is a particularly toxic part of toxic masculinity.Also? Rather than trying to make myself feel different (“why are you sad?? stop that!”) it can help to talk to my i… 7yo explains that when she has a cry, it’s only partly about the inciting incident; she senses that she has pen… update: I ended up back in tech, for various reasons, but it was important for me to fully walk away: it’s on my… @myrrlyn Gl Alex!Today’s card. Too often, rather than meet others where they’re really at, we project a fantasy onto them & get upse…
Retweeted by Aaron TuronSunday night. Kids here. Kitchen respite. @ArmyOfBruce I would have to read a zillion articles before I would dare. And THAT is the conditioning! It’s like…’ve never bought Lysol but I remember the brand from the ad and it instilled a drive to buy a CLASS of product. Be… was like 10 and the commercial was definitely aimed for my mom...... or was it??I will forever be battling the scourge of countertop salmonella.TFW you realize your instincts in the kitchen around meat hygiene originated from a mid-90’s Lysol commercial.I’ve never had a fancy cheese puff that was any good. They’re always gross. In the wrong way. Good cheese puffs a…
The biggest thing I didn’t learn growing up was how to sit with fear.
@kourge @kasianne 😶
Here’s one of the new shirts! Together with a fresh haircut compliments of @kasianne lives still matter.I feel vindicated by the early results on this one. something as axiomatically good is recipe for disaster. Whether a religion, the police, a marriage, a men…
A lot of us need to know that boundaries are not rules we make about how other people can behave. Boundaries are ab…
Retweeted by Aaron Turon @danehighwind It’s so powerful when it happens!In recent years I’ve done so much inner healing and growth work. I’m not finished by any stretch, but I feel a grea…, when I did leave the church, I feel into the next most familiar value system: academia. I went right… eventually started to change in high school, when my church was pushing hard against gay rights and toward schoo… think this is part of the reason that learning about history and government and so on all felt like an abstractio… worldview was fed to me very very early, and as a result a lot of cultural education just... flew right by. I… thing my church upbringing took from me: a sense of connection to the world and people in it. This was mad…
Let’s do this. thread 😡😡😡 Crisis upon crisis upon crisis. We need to do so much better than this.
@graysonarts I’m so glad to hear that! It’s a slow process for sure. For me a key was catching some early glimpses… to say that I am “done” or never experience fear or anything like that. But I have a commitment, now, to not s… can change your life by changing how you respond to fear. I’ve gone from hiding and avoidance to curiousity an… are enough. are some days where you don't write any code. you just review everyone else's code and maybe write documentat…
Retweeted by Aaron Turon @2braids Thank you. @sehurlburt’s been a little while since I’ve talked about my job @fastly. It’s going so well! The people are wonderful—trul… @whyevernotso I agree. There’s something so profound and deeply human there. And I hate that I hesitate due to my l…
Now a couple decades later, I'm thinking about what I lose by closing off. How that wariness still lives in my body… remember clearly, in the immediate aftermath of leaving the church, how sensitive I felt to certain vocal cadence…'ve been thinking about the way that my church upbringing involved emotional manipulation. The practice of "worsh…
Thai tea + bourbon 😍Happy Sunday lot of anxiety is actually shame in disguise. My fear is not that things will go wrong or mistakes will happen b…
Retweeted by Aaron Turon
CW: weight issues Quarantine has hurt my wardrobe doubly: I’ve gained weight AND I can’t go to thrift stores. It b…
Talked about racism in therapy today. One insight: I’ve been transformed by learning to fully feel my feelings and… @ReinH Cannot confirmFeaturing: me
@mgattozzi Big moodAll. Engineering. Is. Political. You can't avoid this. Everything you build changes the world from the way it is i…
Retweeted by Aaron TuronOmg I just heard a cute gender-neutral word for niece/nephew— SIBSPRING
Retweeted by Aaron Turon @mgattozzi Soooo happy for you! What a huge milestone.Oof today was a lot. Not any one thing. Just a lot.
I thought I wanted to impress, but what I needed was to belong. @pnkfelix iPhone XS @mgattozzi Please do this
@WyrdOfWard @Joabble I really enjoy your relationship posts, partly because you’re so visibly happy, partly because I relate so much.Kids in an inflatable pool is just pure joy.
A critical factor in improving my mental health has been a determination to fully experience my life, including pai… greatest healing I’ve experienced is learning to show myself more fully and being loved in response. @mgattozzi I feel this so much. It’s a major area of work in therapy for me. 💜
@mgattozzi It took me so long to figure this out and to understand how I wasn’t actually experiencing my life despi…
@BrainAdventurer Yes, all the time. I will suddenly feel so sure that my partner is angry with me until I finally r…
All my life, what I wanted most was to be part of the group. Even when I told myself the opposite. My belief that…
Sometimes the hardest part is remembering that you WANT to escape. Those old protective patterns can feel so damn c… and over, recognizing the fog, seeing the bonds, making your escape back to yourself. Sometimes the scenarios…, what is the source of your vigilance? What triggered you? What era of your life do you suddenly feel like you… from trauma is like training to become an escape artist. Something carries you away from a felt sense of s… @PdxPestle All of this.