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Alex Heard @alexheard Santa Fe, NM

Editorial director, Outside; author of The Eyes of Willie McGee & Apocalypse Pretty Soon. Cat fan. Bocce, hiking, cooking, and gardening "practitioner."

772 Following   6,196 Followers   67,094 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/12/10


Someone should do an analysis of this: is every southern senator who retires now automatically replaced by a dumber… https://t.co/h6qNTLygsJ"There’s a lot of things that are offensive” to some people, Brito said. "Christ himself was offensive to some fol… https://t.co/dQCUj96PTB @alexheard Isn’t that part of an Outside job application, tho? With tarp? And you have catch the squid first? I mea… https://t.co/fwXfLWwC4x
Retweeted by Alex Heard @LarkinWarren "Not all men." I could gift wrap a live squid. 🦑🎁After all these years, just watched "Billy Elliot" for the first time. Or as I call it: "Flashdance Jr., Set in an… https://t.co/Eih9cZXfKuToday is the day Mike Tomlin became president. https://t.co/tLm1xK08cR @norasack @Anjreu "I am but a simple enthusiast." @norasack @Anjreu Another way to go: if you have hard soil in your yard, forget building a court ($$) and play peta… https://t.co/I2msOTtMXS @nickheil That's a seersucker shirt. It's probably hard to find a modern version that isn't a #fraud. @norasack @Anjreu You need a firmer surface so that the ball rolls instead of plops. In Italy they usually use a co… https://t.co/5FL7uFe3F8 @KellyMeeker Always like getting recipes. Thanks.Groceries are a Distraction. https://t.co/mvLfmABJ6p @KellyMeeker That looks great. Mine is similar—main diff being no rice or garlic + mine has a little nutmeg.It's cold! So I'm making throwback broccoli-and-cheese casserole. I can almost hear the Jolly Green Giant ho-ho'ing his approval. 🥦🧀 @laurelz Yes! @laurelz Those glasses are cool. I also like the old old school glasses in Italian restaurants that were just a sho… https://t.co/UvCYGQskcg46 minutes of Trump doing that thing he do. 😬
12/3
2020
@shannonmstirone That's it. @shannonmstirone The Move is to parallel park into a space that's shorter than your car. @NYDNSports @Marmarescobar Great old photo of Rafer Johnson. https://t.co/5jH4LNK2lk @opinion_joe It's really useful when communicating with other people in the same office. Reduces the total number o… https://t.co/7K5imTyT9tLou Holtz getting the Medal of Freedom reminds me of sports television's ultimate cornball segment. THIS. https://t.co/JlCTcbfqBU @MrWalterShapiro Why isn't this already in production? #DoYourJob, Hallmark Channel. @chrisasolomon Delighted to report that my high school chemistry teacher made us "pipette" this hazardous stuff. It… https://t.co/iizOL9vwZe @MrWalterShapiro When they "meet angry," she can call him "Ben and Jerry" and "Maple Syrup."The two possible Ivanka runs mentioned in this long article are President of the United States (nope) and Congressw… https://t.co/3aiqMLxq2J @carigervin: none of the chyrons are spelling it "Lamar!" Who fell asleep at that switch?We're calling it: a solid 2.25 inches of snow here at Don Diego Farms. ❄️ @ladyhaja @alexheard I don’t understand why people wouldn’t be able to claim exemptions on religious grounds (regar… https://t.co/u9oqB7tfvW
Retweeted by Alex Heard @alexheard Truly a major achievement. We’ll have people refusing to taking it here, but there’s some talk of being… https://t.co/rnzwZHpAvn
Retweeted by Alex Heard @laurelz After a long scroll through big names "in credits order," you reach "Rest of cast listed alphabetically."… https://t.co/000AP82RTB @ladyhaja Many of my fellow Americans will treat the vaccines as a consumer good that is their due and why the fuck… https://t.co/Yt507wkgip @laurelz Was going to say "Gig Young," but I'm now glad I didn't push in those chips. @MattGrubs @norasack I'm holding out for Sputnik, which I hope will be delivered via vodka shots. @norasack Yes, there is! I can fill you in anytime. To avoid heartbreak, surface should not be sand."Santa Fe-based hack editor who has two overweight cats and built a bocce court." Can't say I feel super-optimistic. https://t.co/nEYsUfJoUk @lilabattis Nice shine on the top!It's obvious that constellation-identifier #Ptolemy sometimes just said, "Fuck it. I'm going to connect a few dots… https://t.co/jBgJ48qD7TScientific evidence for my #law. https://t.co/Yob3ivuhzITonight's #constellation rant: Eridanus doesn't look like anything, but there is clearly the face of a James Thurbe… https://t.co/NQ0uDq19tJ @thebradking Nobody dare judge this man. @thebradking What were they? @the_maddawg I was certainly surprised to get this today. https://t.co/AzVtCAVcMB @the_maddawg I think we're going to schlumble along until the vaccine era kicks in. Just guessing, of course. @jaymbouchard Is that a national forest get? Nice tree. @symptomatic @mjmimages If I've played one small part, it's been an honor.
12/2
2020
@alexheard I like the cut of your jib
Retweeted by Alex Heard @jasongay Could you con them with TANG?Attorney General Bill Barr just submitted the first part of his hope-filled application to be hired by a law firm someday.K-Pup's name seems to keep migrating away from the original "Karen." #StopTheSteal https://t.co/22YWCA7hgc @MrWalterShapiro Expand Fox News talk show "The Five" to "The 175." @alexheard Don't know for sure. But my guess is that the network that exists (Heritage Foundation, etc.) is not lar… https://t.co/ECaZFLu4uc
Retweeted by Alex Heard @MrWalterShapiro Just asking: is there a Trump-friendly D.C. borg of think tanks, law firms, lobbying operations th… https://t.co/f9XBR41WYG @stephenrodrick That would end me. I have a lack-of-sunshine problem, which I discovered the first winter I lived in Chicago. @LarkinWarren More than you may want to know about "bored of." https://t.co/Yayvvcw8Oz. @homegypsy Info here: https://t.co/5xqM6iYegr @the_maddawg Saya's looks like The Move. @the_maddawg I dunno. Tell me when you find out. @lizzieohreally 1-part podcast instead of 7. @ejeancarroll just my opinion, of course.This Timothy Leary documentary is boring. @laurelz I may set up a bunk in there. @alexheard Maisy is all over that scene!
Retweeted by Alex Heard @laurelz CVS in my neighborhood has been a crucial Pandemi-hub for supplies like these and much more.There's also this guy, a Chihuahua-pug ("Chug") mix. https://t.co/rH0eT7jJtxImportant: the 2021 Santa Fe Pet Calendar features a couple of goats named Tortilla and Sopapilla. https://t.co/HCooEVFZLM @NKingofDC They got paid. @thebradking You're the anti-Melania. @lizzieohreally 7 part podcast of you searching for them. Only sensible next step, sorry
Retweeted by Alex Heard
12/1
2020
@ratt_ko @maggcsmith Related: tamale recipes typically call for lard. @markyarm @sternbergh You get to see some very nice super-expensive New York apartments. ... Wait, that's bad. @alexheard @ratt_ko I would say yes - I can tell you how many people I’ve met out here who are so confused by me sa… https://t.co/TvxI0jjQY4
Retweeted by Alex Heard @ScottFaldon They should rename this game Tantalus v. Water. @ratt_ko @maggcsmith Does bacon fat in vegetables count as "seasoning"?Ornament Fans: shockingly, a kyot* ornament turns up at 0:23 in the embedded spooky video about this year's White H… https://t.co/m28DEnVU3D @scavendish Well, the stadium *is* pretty close to Rotier's. 🍗🥪🍺 @matthewkassel I was not prepared for a) Penthouse Forum-style quotes from Biden about his lovemaking; b) Leslie Stahl dating Bob Dole.Live report on the Penumbral Lunar Eclipse! So far: meh. @matthewkassel Apparently all the editors were dead that year. "But there’s something else that makes him good cop… https://t.co/bVGllei9HC @thefarmerjones Mason is available now. Changes the equation. @the_maddawg @TrapFreeNM Ugh. Those were both real explanations given online for origin of the term, btw. I didn't make them up!"Possible coaching candidates Vanderbilt could choose to replace Derek Mason" Attn @thefarmerjones ... Apparently t… https://t.co/Qh4oI785uG @JasenThorpe Yes. @alexheard Are you familiar with Beave? Seems like this is his moment. https://t.co/kO0GxqwLWjhttps://t.co/swrocKsy6I
Retweeted by Alex Heard @ACShilton No actual man buys those. Someone mistakenly buys them for him. It's the "soap on a rope" of our time. @laurelz The beavers do a lot of their Beaver Moon work after a hearty dinner of aspen bark and beaver wine.The November full moon is called the Beaver Moon either because 1) trappers used the bright light for one last roun… https://t.co/esV5ovQWRpI was wondering why Kendall Hinton was picked as the Broncos' emergency QB. Oh. "Hinton played quarterback at Sout… https://t.co/p6Y6XRxZNo @hankstuever This is like Murrow softball-interviewing Liberace! @NKingofDC I should get a T-shirt that says: "I VOTED FOR BIDEN BECAUSE I THINK HE'LL BE GOOD, ACTUALLY."
11/30
2020
@andreapitzer A good reply to kids is: "Hey, loser, grow up and write some books and then we'll talk."Will Trump tweet out "Slipping Joe Biden" or "Falling Joe Biden" or "Clumsy Joe Biden" or "Goofyfoot Joe Biden"? A nation waits. @PJMatt One thing, though: I think the majority of teams would have cut the rope at the end of last season. I liked… https://t.co/uChNHJ4Io4 @PJMatt They were uncomfortable with getting more than 1 day of favorable P.R. @Emstiflerwolfe Aha, thanks. It's been fun seeing Orion and the various critters around him. (For those interested—… https://t.co/6LsupvZdvn @PJMatt This is good if you haven't seen it. Much of the movie is actually about a bottom-dwelling team that climbs… https://t.co/X8uLOmeoBTWhich editor cut the last sentence in this crucial graf, which must have said: "This is equally true for cats." ...… https://t.co/V6kzeEgXbW @nickheil I've already added design elements that convert it into a functional bocce scoreboard. (Magnetic faux pep… https://t.co/yRVmC2DJPk @nickheil The Utah monolith really ties my bocce court together. @Emstiflerwolfe I don't know this lore. (And I mean I don't know it because I'm ignorant.) What's the story?
11/29
2020

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