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Amanda Winkel @amanda_winkel Burnaby, British Columbia

humanize the dehumanized (she/her)

403 Following   28 Followers   2,169 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/3/17


tinder in your hometown isn’t about finding love it’s about revenge
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelHappy one year anniversary to the time a girl broke into my building at work, got way too high and then peed on the… https://t.co/r8anEkuqLlI want the biggest ever chunky knit sweater, I mean I want it to fit Andre the Giant and still be baggy, I want it… https://t.co/poTn4KQ5CF*to my dog* i got you to keep me from killing myself 🤗no pressure
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel @emmapearlw NoHaven’t whatever TV show y’all are watching but I love @evilhag and Kristen Stewart too 💖💖 @wvrldwo https://t.co/mr0NKZ82Pz"hey, should we say like..."pre- and post-pandemic phases"? "nah" https://t.co/HHQjl7vNha @wvrldwo SARA TOLD ME TO TELL YOU “I LOVE YOU”me when i meet rihanna https://t.co/RJ7xG4COl3
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelMf’ers will buy a lottery ticket with 1/35,000,000 chance of winning and think “someone’s gotta win, it could be me… https://t.co/o661VTii4chttps://t.co/ThfqJbdyda
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel“BLACK FRIDAY SALES!! BEST PRICES OF THE YEAR” “free shipping on orders over 99$” https://t.co/fT8uBQMhlBhttps://t.co/hshIJof9KE https://t.co/2vThP7pSi6
11/28
2020
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 https://t.co/ke73YBQ7Bs
Retweeted by Amanda Winkelshe came in expecting this and she was fucking ready, she ran her lines backstage https://t.co/Y1K4Fd4WN2not 2 b QAnon or anything, but it does weird me out that SO many famous people are identical to other famous people… https://t.co/GAmgXUQMvE @JenBretty https://t.co/j2f9GEg4AQDonald Trump NPR Tiny Desk Concert https://t.co/IEW4s3lxy4
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel @jbfan911 Once I was sledding with my family and I fell off and scraped half my face off on an ice bank, I don’t re… https://t.co/K0rvMM2HC4Just blacked out and woke up with a confirmation email from Old Navy thanking me for buying a pair of blue velvet bell bottomsThe most stressed out I've ever been about Christmas was when I was 16 and I got my first ever job, working at M&S… https://t.co/Cx7vq5DOlo
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelLMAOOOO https://t.co/Sa1nfDskO9 https://t.co/SgJANBHJ2Q
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/27
2020
@WrittenByHanna @dom_dotty You take that back @chainchompist https://t.co/AxGGWoRuwx @jaccckkie_ @kkmonse He said: that
11/26
2020
I jinxed myself, he came home early https://t.co/Y0wNGk7Ea2happiness doesn't come from being skinny or rich, it comes from when your roommate says he's going out for a few ho… https://t.co/2pc5gw80NOmy sleep schedule and diet are fucked up, but I'm going to choose to focus on the fact that I've lost the 15lbs I'v… https://t.co/vS1za5UsWVaccidentally doing this crash diet from the 60s except dinner is usually just another egg, and I scramble my eggs i… https://t.co/pxUADbxPX1I slept from 9am to 8pm yesterday, and then 3am to 7am last night. My sleep schedule is fucking over https://t.co/y04JsdB63W
11/24
2020
someone (white man in his 40s) left their Spotify logged in at work and their email was "latinaluvr" isn't that nic… https://t.co/c2Z8sbJM7u
11/23
2020
i do my lil dancey dance https://t.co/okAdLN5W9R
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel @redditships I want someone to love and support me like this woman loves and supports her wife, I'm gonna CRY @AITA_reddit I got two sentences in and I've already made my decision, I will not be reading further.People who argue that dramatic changes to policing, including budgetary ones, will mean “violent people will be let… https://t.co/4rPu2tqCjQ
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/22
2020
came inside her in 3.142 seconds.. call that a cream π
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelScott disick be like oh covid’s 19? 🧐
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/19
2020
Me: "I've been feeling pretty great lately, I'm in great shape and feel good about my appearance" My BMI: "well act… https://t.co/DQKTc1z3HSwhen shit is hitting the fan at work, but your shift ends in 30 minutes, you're a casual, and you aren't scheduled… https://t.co/yZattLVn70Wet ass puthie
Retweeted by Amanda Winkely'all I feel: Great. I listen to https://t.co/QxObmg0ifa every day and I am fucking: Thriving. https://t.co/7sO9976CiaPhotoshopped this picture of my dog, got it printed on a canvas for my Mom for Christmas :-) https://t.co/Ca08pSpQULshe’s a lady in the tweets but a freak in the fleets
Retweeted by Amanda Winkelwhy does healing take so long?? i’m so annoyed with myself like jus get over it???
Retweeted by Amanda Winkelworking 120 hours over the next two weeks lol https://t.co/pzMHo2quEb
11/18
2020
did we, as a collective society, forget about spontaneous combustion? That would really cap off 2020 if a bunch of… https://t.co/NiB2poabmIThere is literally no excuse for professors to post their fucking powerpoints with this shitty formatting. https://t.co/x7Vq3cxImO @lexi4prez https://t.co/wddA5PHDmt @lexi4prez https://t.co/2oN0Ea9z1Y @tinderdistrict KNIFE WIFEDoes your worst enemy know that they're your worst enemy? Mine doesn't, he accidentally called me by my sister (his… https://t.co/QDuOUqTLrJI'm writing lecture notes rn about "resilient health care systems" and COVID-19, and I just wanna stakeholders know… https://t.co/hfZEMGDnqw
11/17
2020
Just accidentally called someone baby at work and we just maintained eye contact for like 15 seconds because I didn't feel like backtracking @redditships his post history is literally making me CRY at work
11/15
2020
I will not put a label on it until he asks "Tish..how long has it been since we've waltzed" and I say back "Oh...ho… https://t.co/3HYzZRup8OHaha! Gotcha! That’s actually a baptism! Welcome to Catholicism. https://t.co/O6UIraLtm8
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelWho was the first therapist.. like who said ok these people need mental help
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelMY problems?? No ma'am, those belong to the trees nowgoing for a 6 hour hike and openly crying the entire time https://t.co/4HvmtBCJJy @crocfanpage @NotTheTimCurry
11/14
2020
I never really understood the concept of hiding who u fuck with from social media. I get a man and I want to take o… https://t.co/caKx5NWajT
11/13
2020
This woman is exactly who Biden and the DNC need to listen to. "Normal wasn't that nice for a lot of people " https://t.co/jsEHcHMl0D
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelA friend just shared this. https://t.co/kBoXf8zK0r
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel @MattTheBrand My provinces' health authorities recommended glory holes as an alternative to safe sex, so that could… https://t.co/vMMRdymHUv
11/9
2020
Hmnn. His ex claimed that he abused her with no evidence. He lost all his jobs, his rep, everything. He then comes… https://t.co/cUOpc3ZwkN
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/8
2020
another thing I have to remember to tell him is that there's an episode of Parks and Rec that has Bo Burnham in it,… https://t.co/Cppn3qK44ZSingie Staffed, listening to Christmas music at work, the vibes r immaculate. https://t.co/UmzvoLqKiBI got my bike back from the shop this week and started biking to work again, I understand where Chris Treager was c… https://t.co/NW1vzGKGyOJust got so fed up with the ends of my hair feeling like straw that I cut my own hair for the first time, using nay… https://t.co/LTL8Nx2KPFThe platonic intimacy between me and the old Asian man letting me sit in his mostly empty restaurant for 3 hours be… https://t.co/0sthl5GpF3
11/7
2020
https://t.co/KQilFNK9Fb
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelI have 4 ramekins in my cupboard, of a normal ramekin size, and since they are not the perfectly adequate size for… https://t.co/C7426RZidM @LucyEverleigh “That’s enough, we made enough” KILLED me https://t.co/u1BBcWShoT
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/6
2020
@goodbeanaltalt You know...marijuana IS a memory loss drug. Did you just forget that u smoked a FADDY blunt?As the election comes to a close, I just want everyone to remember the weight of the phrase “well who built the cag… https://t.co/wqSCUDr3Av
11/5
2020
weird subplot that Goldmember likes to save and eat his skin flakesIn honour of the US election, I am going to live-tweet a film which has a more believable plot and premise than Ame… https://t.co/6vPIdssGKMI always have the best Halloween costume ideas at the beginning of November. Anyways I'm going as Austin Powers nex… https://t.co/jC37C4TxMNFunny this is the only wall he ended up building - are you scared of the country you’ve created? https://t.co/bIqSmrWtFa
Retweeted by Amanda WinkelThis is the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen in my entire life I'm losing my shit https://t.co/Pw28r3HKKfNot as funny as the first time I woke myself up laughing, which was because I was dreaming about babies but with re… https://t.co/D6UcKDpKKndifferent angle, so he put his hand at a perpendicular angle to the paper with just his two middle fingers on the p… https://t.co/LxTE0frkGPTweeting so I don't forget, and I can tell my ex-boyfriend when I decide I want to be his friend again: I had anoth… https://t.co/j4safgoedC
11/4
2020
cleaning products are NOT seasonings, you CANNOT make ur own spicy blend.I don't wanna say Surrey https://t.co/U8gYBQ5O7BCan't believe I keep holding myself to this stupid fucking standard of not buying a pet while going through a spell… https://t.co/iA0rjxbjHqMy body is telling me to go to sleep, it's night night time, my computer is telling me it's actually only 5:47 @sarahlugor @babyluvscherry I have like 20 twitter followers, NO one is paying me to say that I fucking love Spotif… https://t.co/76JbuMhk1A
11/3
2020
When I get sad thinking about my failures I remind myself about cheese fondue guy that tried to use cheese that was… https://t.co/HfcoQDrFSM @_TayStar what about like...grocery shopping
11/2
2020
Spooky spooky spooky https://t.co/zmxsmolvqySet my alarm clock the wrong way and accidentally got up at 6am instead of 8amGuess what? ❄️ https://t.co/2IUNkCOyCz
Retweeted by Amanda Winkel
11/1
2020
I know all about BUYING vegetables, you're telling me to get the benefits I have to eAT them too???The dopamine that the Brooklyn 99 intro induces is unparalleledI wish I could comment on people's Spotify playlists, sometimes they're such a perfect ~vibe~ and they DON'T have a… https://t.co/tSIiIfr4Ah
10/31
2020
@AITA_reddit The fact that he told his friend that his girlfriend said it was okay, and didn't just tell his friend… https://t.co/Iszwe5PKYH
10/30
2020
"...So I'm going to put you into breakout rooms" "Remember the essay is due tonight and the midterm is due next cla… https://t.co/XLLMzgZ5kamy highschool boyfriends' mom is on my recommended friends suggestions on Facebook, should I go for it? Shoot my shot?
10/27
2020

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