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I do finger guns at the most inappropriate times.

186 Following   636 Followers   12,960 Tweets

Joined Twitter 2/12/09
I’m glad my language app considers “pizza” a basic word I need to know. @ReubenSangwich Glad we’re on the same page here @tayAFK You still look majestic @ReubenSangwich I’ve never done that one but I have forgotten I already brew coffee only to brew it a second time a… looking at house has me so pumped on the potential of living somewhere with a yard and any natural light. IM G… @ProfessorPeyton @lzzcat It sounds like you got Lizzie’s ads 😂I’m so tired I just tried to brew coffeewith no coffee grounds.....
@Denver_dan @lzzcat Too true @lzzcat @Denver_dan I can’t weight in. I don’t even know which one is which @Denver_dan @lzzcat Oh I bet passions run deep with that one 😂 @Denver_dan I blame 2020 and Emily hahaI think I just accidentally became a k-pop stan.
It’s @lzzcat househunting has taught me so far is that I genuinely don’t know any of the names of neighborhoods in Denver or the suburbs.
It is time.
Retweeted by doody2chainz @chanceftw I don’t know if it’s true for you but I feel like this happens all the time when I’m tired. My responses get all messed up
I’m pretty sure I’ve been in an awkward phase my whole life.I have a really rough time once I actually go back to work because none of my clothes are going to fit
I know the popular analysis is going to be “we’re screwed,” and I *feel you.* But nah. RBG didn’t go out like tha…
Retweeted by doody2chainz @TheeAnnaMaria 😢💖 @Deeebluhd What are your feelings on “Danno” @writertina Thank you so much. That really means a lotThe kind of content I need right now say ‘no worries’ far too much for someone who is approx. 94% worry
Retweeted by doody2chainzSomeday I’ll believe that people really can love me for me and that I deserve to be happy
Retweeted by doody2chainz @lzzcat Like drunk history for literature
@lzzcat 🥰 @lzzcat I’m so happy you get to stare at my mug like that. 😂 @noslennai Hahaha because one of my college professors had inherited a “copyrighted” clown makeup design so he explained the process to us @Deeebluhd It’s even weirder because the “clown egg warehouse” is in some weird ass old church somewhere in England… @TheeAnnaMaria Oddly enough I only know this because one of my college professors had inherited a “copyrighted” clown makeup design.I have told so many people this fact and straight up no one believes me but I also can’t blame them definitely plan on becoming an alcoholic soon
@lzzcat @shanebaiotto I know! I’m so pumped! @beatrice21 @shanebaiotto It’s so cute! I love it so much!Ever get so upset you just start baking because it’s all you can do to get your mind off things?Best boyfriend award goes to @shanebaiotto because last week I sent him this photo telling him how cute I thought t… always forget my Apple ID photo is Wayne Campbell until I give someone my contact info... @Deeebluhd This is one of the most depressing things I’ve ever read @Deeebluhd It’s the worst! I feel like such an asshole because I don’t remember doing so many things. On top of tha… been so tired you straight up forget about half of the things you’ve done in the last week? Like I’ve done so… I drop when I die @bivocado Cerave is always a solid choice. I handle paper all day and it dries out my hands something awful but thi… @lindsaygoddamit You know in Ghostbusters where whatever thoughts you have get summoned for evil? At least you won’…
As someone who worked retail for over a decade it’s very strange to work for a company that actually gives a shit about me.Is it weird that sometimes I put in my in-ear headphones and completely forget to start my music? Just being able t… @sassymacymeow It has Fran Drescher in it and it’s 90s gold.Please tell me someone else has seen Beautician and the Beast
Retweeted by doody2chainzme when the janitor just mopped and i’m not tryna ruin their work
Retweeted by doody2chainz @lzzcat Ooooooooh I like it @lzzcat My name is only 4 letter so I guess I’m plain old fuck @lindsaygoddamit Go get some more horchata. It will fix everything
I could use some good news. My heart is so tired.
USA in movies USA in real life
Retweeted by doody2chainz @lzzcat it’s us FORGET.
Retweeted by doody2chainz
Excited to share this item in my Etsy shop! Feline Fortune - Transparent Grey Tray With Gold Flakes and Cat Tarot C… Covid is a real bad time to be someone who compulsively puts things in their mouth.Short hair vs. long hair I think the first photo is from 9th grade when my mom decided it’d be cute for me, a tomb… does anyone with long hair sleep with their hair down? How do you not sleep on it and fuck up your neck? Tell me your secrets!
@Deeebluhd This is about as reckless as I getFeeling adventurous today so I ordered a meatball sandwich while wearing a white tee.
I extra hate coronavirus crap when it’s cold because I can’t tell who the hell anyone at work is when they pop in i…
@lzzcat Right? I was highly impressedPretty spot on Meiker ~ @noslennai I’ll take what I can get at this point @ReubenSangwich @lzzcat @Denver_dan haha!
I would legitimately kill for a vacation. @sassymacymeow I’ll be putting them in an Etsy shop for sale soon!Pastel goth anyone? 🖤💕
Since it’s supposed to snow on Tuesday now would probably be a great time for me to actually see if any of my pants😅You got it
If I made more of these would anyone be interested in buying one?
Retweeted by doody2chainz @Deeebluhd It’s technically already promised to someone but I can make you one!I tried to make a thing. It’s still rough and not polished yet but not bad for a first try found my new calling in life. I’m going to be an interior decorator but spruce up people’s houses with subtle ner…
@supsaruhhh Absolutely. I wholeheartedly support what you are doing and am always here to lend a hand if you need @supsaruhhh I believe that’s silly. Everyone deals with grief differently and you are choosing to channel yours int… @lzzcat @ReubenSangwich One of the many skills I have that I never thought would come in handy @ReubenSangwich @lzzcat Also I would like to be recognized for the top notch photo editing on the shirt 😂I’m so tired of doing the right thing for the sake of it when no one else does the same. I’m tired of my kindness i…
I am so sad. My skin was so soft and now it feels rougher than my 800 grit sandpaper because my face is a giant hiv… internalize stress so much you don’t even realize you’re that stressed out until you get hives from it?
Retweeted by doody2chainzI don’t even know what I want anymore."I hope this email finds you well." How this email finds me:
Retweeted by doody2chainzWell the quarantine weight gain has finally kicked in 😭
“I saw you and you didn’t say hi” Me:
Retweeted by doody2chainzI’m about .5 seconds away from shaving my eyebrows off and drawing those bad boys on. Why can’t they just look norm…
Fuck depression. @Deeebluhd I do the same thing but around where I live. *someday*There is so good news anymore.
sorry i talked to you about my trauma, do you still think I'm cute though
Retweeted by doody2chainzI have a very love/hate relationship with surprises. On one hand, I love the feeling on being surprised but one the…