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Jew

2,322 Following   721,220 Followers   60,206 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/8/09


If MOTD has the technology to see if a ball has gone out of play why hasn’t VAR? Ones funded by the BBC the other by FIFA. @desbrem @chloehadj Bye, Des. @bigchriswilson @FrankOnTheRadio That's great Chris. Sorry I missed it at the time!I missed this last year. How beautiful. Thank you, and thanks to Molly and her classmate. https://t.co/zFzgkuBcxM @daraobriain @TheComedyStore @SkyUK @normmacdonald @DougStanhope CK said that in his heyday, Mitzi wouldn't book hi… https://t.co/vCDfeB7aFN @gmk3000 @TheComedyStore @SkyUK @normmacdonald @DougStanhope Incredibly briefly, yes.The leaked phone call about Melania complaining about organising Christmas decorations is one of the highlights of… https://t.co/4DDvrvVaHu
Retweeted by David Baddiel @SufiSenses Glad you went, and glad it was good. Did you tell her about the tweet...?https://t.co/dcbPJe3K8q @towittertowoo @chloehadj I dunno, it can be complex and mundane.I only really have one motto in life, which is: the truth is always complex. This brilliant podcast by @chloehadj b… https://t.co/0iTv18mzIfFirst visit to Colin B since lockdown lifted and he’s looking good. https://t.co/tdspF3lNSBPlease support our raffle to improve the outdoor learning spaces @WilliamEllisSch Thank yous to all who have dona… https://t.co/2d1lSUA16Z
Retweeted by David Baddiel @FrankOnTheRadio I suspect Johnny Briggs might. @FrankOnTheRadio https://t.co/LJpc8lpUOu @BarkerCapsticks About to get in the shower to Corner Of The Sky from the musical Pippin.
12/5
2020
This was most enjoyable to do. Thanks to all who attended. https://t.co/BRxxbcsURJWondering about setting up an Only Fans account where people pay me not to get naked. @jramage84 To be honest, I think of Twitter to some extent - at least as regards jokes - as a new material/try out… https://t.co/oaDseyZ540 @OfSelina I think I'd have to pay people to let me do that.Although of course at the moment I do have no show.Ah, if only all Twitter interactions were like this. Then again, I would have no show. https://t.co/jfgYI2UYD2 @FeetPetite Thank you!Can I also add that #TrollsnottheDolls is not only a great show, it is an excellent primer and support for anyone o… https://t.co/eBgKCCyrCT
Retweeted by David Baddiel"I really like this book. It is written by my favourite author & is exciting & funny. I read it all in one weekend… https://t.co/DCfRBjTZ8I
Retweeted by David BaddielCheers Max. The tour will one day next year be on again and finishing its second half. https://t.co/RLv9DEah2zSo delighted to see @rcwlitagency’s @kevtsang @kwebberwrites @fran_gibbons @carliesorosiak @ldlapinskihttps://t.co/d6N6x5NALn
Retweeted by David Baddiel @jonronson It may be the case that any sentence you see on the internet saying "Look at what links all the people w… https://t.co/w7Wn2qTrnyMy pal's band have made a lovely wee 2020 appropriate Christmas record with all proceeds going to Crisis. Go on, he… https://t.co/VcBranCWuH
Retweeted by David BaddielI believe this is how religion works. Only, historically, with some enforcement. https://t.co/Qskj7WxNX3 @petercmoore Think that joke would work better as "To keep myself from ending too early during sex, I think about a… https://t.co/HUlilCt5SZ @teaforpterosaur I'm always like this Hannah.I'm talking about cold showers btw. Not sex.Discovered that the key is to play an inspirational song to get you through it. Today, Show Me Heaven by Maria McKe… https://t.co/lTisk1C1XcMike Binder's series about @TheComedyStore on @SkyUK Doc channel is very good - especially if you're obsessed with… https://t.co/sdkyN63YwT @omid9 @sinavaliollah @ShadiAsadollahi What channel can I see this on?Tomorrow night at 7! Link here. https://t.co/Jk6fJRTBdc and go to https://t.co/iXtay9zLNy and get yourself on the b… https://t.co/vTQd2oFYFt
Retweeted by David BaddielMy upcoming @howtoacademy interviews include: @NickyBenedetti @herdyshepherd1 @DrPippaM Eddie Jones (… https://t.co/TEeZm59U6a
Retweeted by David Baddiel
12/4
2020
@madeleinelily It’s brilliant.Pretty sure that's @danacarvey doing a character. https://t.co/6GmGqTiL1PWhat I like about this, what Trump calls his most important speech ever, most, is that virtually no-one gave it any… https://t.co/cc33bAXfhmGiven that my top song was Smuckers by Tyler The Creator featuring Lil Wayne and Kanye West, that my kids are using… https://t.co/8fRMVOrLhjNo reason why I shouldn't do it this year. In fact, more so. https://t.co/nJESSQ2ENuDull question. Thermostats. The new ones with wi-fi. Can you put them anywhere in your house? Or do they have to be wired in by a grown-up?Listen to the mind of God That doesn't need to be ...is my new favourite atheist statement that still allows for w… https://t.co/wBHG5E3qnZI seem to have spent a large section of my life unsuccessfully trying to fit devices that I have lost the charging… https://t.co/meUkGnbqWjDid you know it's the UN's #InternationalDayOfPersonsWithDisabilities? It's so important that children's books ar… https://t.co/Crjupt9YuA
Retweeted by David Baddiel @NatalieHibberd @Booktrust Thank you! @Carpervert @sniffpetrol @FrankOnTheRadio I enjoyed the gig immensely.Hooray! https://t.co/rqCXWsWk8dThe details of the event that a leading light of Viktor Orban’s hard-right anti-gay party fled from naked before be… https://t.co/0Zg6gv9DNI @Baddiel The Cyberdine Systems model MH-001 has been known to display odd behaviour when in close proximity to huma… https://t.co/hUgBhRYEkM
Retweeted by David Baddiel
12/3
2020
Incredibly classy striker’s performance from Giroud tonight #SEVCHENever was there a man with more complicated last wishes than my love. Like everything @andygangof4 did, it is mor… https://t.co/FERF9q9nqo
Retweeted by David BaddielWe might finally find out how many children he has.Just imagine if it was a truth serum. https://t.co/5YI0jiOZn5The Gouster is a better album than Young Americans. There, I've said it. @OliveTree_StM Yes. There's a point halfway through where she nearly changes hands again, and then thinks better of it.It reminds a bit of that very disturbing scene where the prisoner's girlfriend visits him after a year in prison in… https://t.co/VAgkBtNMPrThis is very odd. Is it possible that before this moment Matt Hancock had never actually seen a woman before? https://t.co/S2DG3bDdZz @JimMFelton I’m hearing Hugh Dennis saying “milky, milky”.
Retweeted by David BaddielI have a Facebook pal from the old days in my pub screaming about “am not taking a vaccine, you don’t know what’s i… https://t.co/nwc610davG
Retweeted by David BaddielHahaha https://t.co/wlJsxmmTnD
Retweeted by David BaddielTrying that again WITHOUT the insomnia-induced typos: What better way to celebrate the end of lockdown than staying… https://t.co/HqIU6Wkjs6
Retweeted by David BaddielGreat idea. Do pledge if you can. https://t.co/pgeWT1JgV3 @kevcecil I found the whole "I'll take this home with me" odd. Although to be fair, I hate it in dramas where there… https://t.co/pZu0LkcI3x @athenakugblenu Any more info on the sandwich? @JuliaHB1 @hugorifkind @estellecostanza I'm going to decline more chat about this before the spoiler alert police go mental.There was one on the Queen's Gambit the other night, and it was a highly charged emotional scene, where she happene… https://t.co/nD4Ict5e5hI literally can't see a scene on TV where there's a sandwich without thinking primarily about the sandwich. @hugorifkind @estellecostanza It is unusual to have a whodunnit where both the who and the dunnit that are apparent… https://t.co/LNIey2jexvThanks Rebecca. It's a Sat Nav speaking, btw. https://t.co/XbhudjWJXj @VictoriaPeckham I was there. Well, at a different university but signing exactly the same messages. Which incident… https://t.co/DLB6tDxzh5I too would let Bill Gates do this to Rob. https://t.co/o7NunGQcS5 @satwindersehmi I for one would welcome our new baked pastry with a savoury filling overlords.Yep, I'll be reading and talking about various different types of writing, including non-fiction, via a tiny bit of… https://t.co/9OIuWifNsnNo doubt true, but to clarify: it's a *lot* frivolous. https://t.co/YF872vb4a2My son asked this morning “Yeah but what if you go into a pub that’s got round the regulations by serving scotch eg… https://t.co/3n6CltWmokMedical tip. If someone tells you they're not going to have the vaccine, take a scroll through the rest of their ti… https://t.co/ewpVYcUuTW
Retweeted by David Baddiel @aholgate @peterfrankopan @RSLiterature @thesundaytimes @YoungWriterYear @ShortStoryAward Welcome. @StevieBoylan It’s English Breakfast Day.You won’t catch me eating cheese. How do we know what’s in it? Who tested it? There was a woman in Mexico ate a sli… https://t.co/ysIDvgsMj1
Retweeted by David Baddiel“I’m quite famous for being an optimistic person” Matt Hancock on Today. I’m not *sure* that’s what he’s most fam… https://t.co/SiIBUO6KIEIt’s a morning to post this again. And also accept again that some people are going to misunderstand it. https://t.co/V260NCbnxJ @Baddiel will be in Bath on December 12th @TheForumBath to introduce his brand new blockbuster. 'Future Friend'. Fi… https://t.co/WlbYsRvUk1
Retweeted by David BaddielWin one of 5 copies of @Baddiel's new book 'Future Friend', a terrifically entertaining time-slip adventure that co… https://t.co/pux1Pw8zne
Retweeted by David Baddiel
12/2
2020
@Skin75and01 I did it in the first part of the tour (before it got postponed) which was full of gigs in the North.There was a time when anything about Diana would be on TV. Now it's anything about Diana's interview on TV will be on TV.I watched a documentary about Martin Bashir last night that I'm sure was basically on a month earlier. And yet it wasn't a repeat.Dance like no-one is watching. Sing like no-one is listening. Then, presumably, get sacked by your record company.The font that I have to employ to allow me to see words on my screen is getting bigger every day. Soon I will be using Gargantuan ∞.Which one is which? https://t.co/lFbVoRiomB @omid9 @Richard_Schiff I didn't really think we should have thought about Mel for Lenny. @MatthewStadlen That's not my point, Matthew. My point is that whatever warnings are put on a show like that, peopl… https://t.co/Dg0avrP63UFor the last 6 months, I’ve been a member of a Signal group called ‘trollhunters’. A small group of people who’d no… https://t.co/OzEdGIZvkZ
Retweeted by David Baddiel @jonholmes1 @justinmoorhouse #alsoitdoesntrhyme @simonblackwell Try conscious uncoupling, Bing. @caitlinmoran Well, also there's a problem, as marriage guidance often leads to reconciliation: which the song, doe… https://t.co/M16OmqJcqB @justinmoorhouse Slide them out of your DMs, Em #updated50waysHearing Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover on the radio, it occurs to me that Paul Simon's exhaustive list misses out "… https://t.co/kEfQCNgxu5
12/1
2020

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