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(He/him) Video game writer at Fusebox Games, working on the Love Island series. Aspiring novelist. Member of Comedysportz UK | #BAFTAcrew 2019 | Jewish

2,112 Following   884 Followers   14,857 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/20/09


@MurkinTeri Same techniqueTrump used his public office -- the most sacred office in our country -- to try to pursue his private electoral int… https://t.co/jD2jAQhhhf
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @McGarnical @docsquiddy Xbeese @literallycait Hi Caitlin! I queried you at the end of July (just after you re-opened) - should I assume that it's a pass by this point? @baetog_ My Karamo floral bomber jacket @BoldBebo This was my first ever cologne as an awkward teen!
11/22
2019
@HazelMonforton I don't know Tsoureki, but the others all make my list.‘I’d be a paedophile too if my wife let me’ ok Toby https://t.co/iR9B7AyhZK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @stejormur It's such a weird accent. County Durham + years of living in America.Don't honestly care much about Corbyn. He's done good stuff in the past but he's got had faults, enough that make h… https://t.co/gCVIu3GKqc
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)I had to do it. The Nunes face and expression demanded it. https://t.co/ypULFzmGWQ
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)There are only 4 types of developers in meetings. https://t.co/k7xfh6aNsK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/21
2019
@RatCasket Reminds me of my fav meme joke. I chuckle to myself at this one at least weekly. https://t.co/mT2kdCoph0
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)been laughin at this for over 13 hours https://t.co/8f2FofSacA
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)It's real fucked up how anthropologists invented emotional labor to criticize an aspect of workplace culture under… https://t.co/QrcYuGSxHo
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)if you ghost a dude after talking to him for a couple hours because he gave you a weird feeling in your gut, you we… https://t.co/pFLfRxpDqn
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)vin disel's radical teen cousin from the fast and furious cartoon looks like they added ross from friends into over… https://t.co/1Nkz3kk2bL
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)911: what's your emergency sir me: I can't find my butler 911: perhaps he is pretending to be a 911 dispatcher li… https://t.co/byDZnDlMmK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Me: hi welcome to Staples Customer: I’m looking for a notebook Me: oh man good luck maybe u should go to Notebook… https://t.co/D6FUu8VIER
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)[all the waiters start to sing happy birthday] me: oh god how embarrassing wife: it's not even your birthday me: no… https://t.co/YKFFt4fKfn
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/20
2019
Struggling with crafting the first sentence of your novel? Be comforted by the fact that AI is struggling even mo… https://t.co/p1icTn5LFE
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)All parties contain antisemitism. If you single out Labour, you're doing Tory work. https://t.co/qhG3ZRMcPs😍 https://t.co/NS4tRdwOd0
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)https://t.co/DBbi7OWznL
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)What, if anything, can Wizards of the Coast do to repair its relationship with its LGBTQIA+ customers? https://t.co/aDthX8exDF
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)A thread about narrative states. Suppose we have a dating sim where outcome is decided by the player's relationshi… https://t.co/Bh0YC5sYhg
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/19
2019
@benjamin_sabin Just buy up all the pumpkins in the shop in October and sell them to people for twice the price. Hoardy gourdy @manairport Hi, please ask your security staff to refrain from making political comments while processing our stuff… https://t.co/BCPeOfPCMnhello here is a short story i wrote for a competition i didn't win. enjoy https://t.co/UtRwr93iKE
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Hello! If anyone is interested, the lyrics to The Information Age are right here: https://t.co/d2Y5Jd9GH6 - big, bi… https://t.co/uSo7WnPNga
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/18
2019
@antigonized https://t.co/gkGag61aP0
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @antigonized This one has always made me weep. Here's the link in case the text is too small:… https://t.co/OE8mxzQjyN
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @antigonized https://t.co/TKC2887UyN
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)More Breaking: A Labour government will pass an emergency “NHS protection” law if it wins the general election, to… https://t.co/TpUoUl32V2
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/17
2019
@Keevahh Quit work?
11/16
2019
It's #VisibleWomen again? :'D I'm Christina and a freelance artist from Germany. I work for tabletop, card art an… https://t.co/AW3SAGpSpI
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)me: i'm terrified of snakes therapist: it's normal to suffer from this kind of hys- me: *panicking* did u fucken hear that
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)"Eating cookies is Cookie Monster's whole reason for being, but as a puppet he can't actually eat them. It's a trag… https://t.co/rqn8yJKfM3it’s official this is the best tiktok to exist https://t.co/aADZh5jJKm
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @UPSHelp Hi! How am I supposed to change the delivery date for a package if it says my phone number is invalid? It's not invalid. @PeterFobian Is that Guillermo del Toro?gf: i’m breaking up with you me: is it because i refuse to get a job and keep streaming to 0 viewers? gf: yes m… https://t.co/olZotmSrLq
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Find me something cuter than a shopping list written by a six year old. She’s planning her big sister’s birthday bu… https://t.co/ESCw1Krd7m
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/15
2019
Every now and then I remember Big Challenges and smile fondly. https://t.co/6xTLMWQWKNRediscovered this classic https://t.co/TNOURyXQfS[sifting through mail] baby shower invitation? Haha, um no thanks, Linda. I have a regular size shower that I can use whenever I want
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)9 million people aren't registered to vote - the deadline to register to vote in the imminent election is less than… https://t.co/eOApuKtZKV
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Loss - Infinitely flexible and mashable - Unique combo of pattern recognition and the "Rickroll effect" - Tim Buck… https://t.co/1Y05YtZEBB
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)"Thanks for the Christmas pudding, but three children died in that lake" https://t.co/n7243gK223
11/14
2019
We were trying to do it right. Somebody stepped in and stopped us. Who was it? What is their problem? And what can we do about it?
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Thread: I worked at Wizards when the Bolas arc was being planned. I am a gay man and was consulted on queer represe… https://t.co/bd4aLe749l
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)I was yelling to myself about how Sonic will never be cute no matter what magic is done to him, so I challenged mys… https://t.co/R6231QEqTk
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)When you're trying to wash off a toothpaste that fell from a toothbrush and stuck to the sink https://t.co/WLbMroWBve
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)guys i just read this book called harry potter well worth checking out it’s about a really interesting magic lad
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @_JakeTucker Pinging @AmandaTNStevens @MarkGrainger @GriddleOctopus I mostly remember him as the prince in Enchanted.
11/13
2019
Hmm, not sure about this change https://t.co/wHTzEqt9Wb
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @katie_kaestner "Your decisions have led you here. Your daemon is the gecko. You are intelligent and very intuitive… https://t.co/leeXXNF4OE @DrSueOosthuizen Me when it gets to September and I have to thresh my corn https://t.co/LRAd9XOS4Y @AngelosLH I like that the Bradwell logo in your name is also the Japanese for 'king'. @Peter5tewart @edfear Step 1: set your time machine to 2006 @edfear @Peter5tewart Ah yes, you're right. That makes a lot of sense. @Peter5tewart To this day I have no idea. Where were the keycards? Security staff?Twitter friends! I’m on the look out for people who are FLUENT and able to translate (written & spoken) from Englis… https://t.co/2W6whA6z5Q
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @Peter5tewart Quickly realising we were not supposed to be there, we left and eventually did find a kind of recepti… https://t.co/IAuScZ9pSi @Peter5tewart In 2006, while on exchange in Japan, some friends and I went to visit the SE building. We walked insi… https://t.co/BRfzMbfgg4My cat loves licking me, but can’t stand when I do it back https://t.co/KYNEWzrnF8
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @katie_kaestner https://t.co/T08XKJwYut @katie_kaestner do it toooo! I journeyed through the world of #HisDarkMaterials and discovered my daemon is a geck… https://t.co/zhKOEI2ORHOne of my all-time fav videos. Always gets a RT/share when I see it. 😆 https://t.co/IZHM4u7miD
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)surely a ramp would be better https://t.co/DUIAkpr4Xl
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/12
2019
You DO NOT NEED A FIXED ADDRESS to register to vote Please pass this on to people you know in unstable housing sit… https://t.co/DYwbUeEvIK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/11
2019
Amid the comedy of so much of the poppy stuff, there are a few more serious questions: - why is it now so central t… https://t.co/gsZDh3ldQ7
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)i see the president is commemorating the anniversary of kristallnacht https://t.co/ALPCKuGbtF
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/10
2019
I am Bench, God of Israel This did not work https://t.co/1HEXXm8J6ghttps://t.co/KyQIuyFoQB https://t.co/xMSATQ7zBz @SaffronOlive My fave combo is Dragon Mage and Rule of Law!Eddie is one of our desert tortoises. If you don’t push the door shut all the way, he will open it and come in. Edd… https://t.co/pXBRYEDHEP
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Tangled (2010) original concept art by Craig Mullins https://t.co/U7xc8mlOAc
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)もみもみうどん職人、 もみもみパン屋さん。 https://t.co/KA7yyffOqh
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @erindipper Fuck yeah! Go for it!Those dogs were amazing and so sweet! I had their toys hidden in my pockets. Nothing was more satisfying than handi… https://t.co/rVVBfxe7oq
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/9
2019
everyone who is a writer should get into running bc it's important to have at least one hobby you hate even more than writing
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Escape #madewithunity #shaders #gamedev https://t.co/LMXzPLyVhT
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @AlexWattsEsq @Brainmage @EwaSR Alex Watts, whipping a tortoise, screaming DO AS I COMMAND, BOY into its face @Brainmage @AlexWattsEsq "Ah, the beautiful game" cackles @EwaSR as she sends Alex a letter written in Guy's handwr… https://t.co/DqLYQOIvBWMe: [whips off disguise] Me: AHA! I was a bleeding skeleton this whole time. Me: Me: wait Me: call an ambulanceif you liked ‘homework’, you’re gonna love ‘freelance writing’
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Not one solitary fuck #sheffieldfloods https://t.co/iQFuXrjktj
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman) @wrongwaygoback Good point. I'm not a big fan of Insatiable Appetite actually - I think that could be cut instead of a witch. @wrongwaygoback Oh and I think memory theft will do more for you in this deck than lucky clover. Not quite enough a… https://t.co/945YMhlEhi @wrongwaygoback I would cut both barrow witches for the wicked guardian and the tempting witch, I think.
11/8
2019
every time i see someone saying "we can't have free healthcare, what if people abuse it?" i think of this post https://t.co/MQbVpwRjPK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)Conservatives be like 'everything liberals fought for so far - weekends, fixed working hours, the vote - is fine, b… https://t.co/trhox0QJ2PThey found her old tweets https://t.co/7eJZRKO8JK
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/7
2019
@thatemilykelley It's so good!I can't believe Fire Emblem Three Houses tricked me into watching an animeA lot of people pretending not to understand the main stances of the parties. One last time: Lib Dems: We will rev… https://t.co/gVYm8csqPg
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)why does this cat look like a 14th century squire who was cursed by a wizard to live his life as an animal for thou… https://t.co/pSwBPE08xi
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)German: München French and English: Munich German: weird but OK Czech: Mnichov German: I guess Polish: Monachium Ge… https://t.co/6PzIuepj0v
Retweeted by Bench (Ben Kaestner-Frenchman)
11/6
2019

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