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I seem cool until you get to know me. it/its

120 Following   145 Followers   1,386 Tweets

Joined Twitter 12/11/13


@__fatcheeks This is surreal. I heard someone at my college say that exact sentence at the end of your tweet a few… https://t.co/WoFANZdmPI
4/2
2020
420 will be an entire month this year
Retweeted by Sean MacNair
4/1
2020
The truth is a stubborn thing.
3/31
2020
@dusttodigital Just listened to this guy's album Abale Ndikuwuzeni. It was really good, and I recommend it wholeheartedly!Thinking of changing my name to “Magnet”
3/28
2020
When this quarantine is over, I’m going to Fuquay-Varina.
3/27
2020
@DorianGothard You are providing a valuable public service, sir.Left the oven on as a prank
3/26
2020
If I had a dad I would name it Connor
3/25
2020
@evangrondner you're so bourgeoisie
3/22
2020
Probably the single worst thing about having had a bunch of brain surgeries is that now I have a bunch of places on… https://t.co/1juny5ChDzNow y’all know how I felt in 2017 when they told me I couldn’t go to college.
3/21
2020
@evangrondner Please stop making tweets calling me out!Day 1 of COVID outbreak: No school, cheap gas? We should have viral outbreaks more often! :) Today: The car’s on f… https://t.co/Blj9TvvRdD
3/17
2020
I can respect people named Shaun, but Shawn? I cannot take them seriously. @evangrondner 1 million dollars is transient, but the memory of the Hanks dinner would last me a lifetime.
3/15
2020
Every morning I wake up and I yell at my dog.
3/8
2020
@DAVID_FIRTH @theneedledrop The one on “You Can Call Me Al” is also so fucking groovy.
3/6
2020
@AndrewYang I feel like there are different kinds of anger. Just being frustrated and unable to act because you are… https://t.co/Ss1cwVnew1 @evangrondner This is the tweet in which you went too far
3/2
2020
Another entry into this list of worst songs ever: that “lowkey lowkey you should really get to know me” travesty.world, where they can be shared with others and responded to. I’m a real melophile, so I love not just listening to… https://t.co/lC8zcH3H5gWell, those are the songs I wanted to talk about. I’m a guy who listens to a lot of music, and I had been wanting t… https://t.co/oq8BulNTMnand powerful, and when she says “Only a moment leeeeeeeeeeeft” it sends chills down my spine. It’s an incredible pi… https://t.co/htXMfIzLfpbut engage with it even on the first listen. And while with most songs that immediately engage me their goodness bu… https://t.co/5cHYTk1gm7first time I listen to an album regardless of its overall quality, and it’s usually only after multiple listens tha… https://t.co/U6gbo5Z1BMhttps://t.co/UzxUynfIRm I’ve already written about this song on Twitter before, but I didn’t really describe WHY it… https://t.co/KBwqHUNERJreassuring to the soul that it is honestly ridiculous. It’s a perfect resolution to the whole album. I know there’s… https://t.co/2qel05Ig4jhttps://t.co/O3JlRmlG3J How do I even put how I feel about this song into words? I used to have this burned to a CD… https://t.co/D6mSOk7epMsomething deeply abrasive transitioning into something incredibly uplifting and soul-gratifying. I also love the sy… https://t.co/rxxuVT02Klhttps://t.co/5z7QoBotX1 What a great song. I think there’s a particular magic to the way it transitions from the di… https://t.co/3JARyEQj8nI’m gonna write about some songs I love in this thread so if you don’t wanna read my bullshit fangirling just move… https://t.co/kNb83xrX6Qhttps://t.co/prI9sVcmZo @atlleader27 Feeling this
2/29
2020
@Sethical_ Nice try, Wesley Snipes.My political position is that I am anti-malarkey. @thewastedworld It's very abstract and kinda hard to put into words, but I think that was the point. It's very med… https://t.co/niXl3MXtem @thewastedworld yo that's crazy I just read this book
2/28
2020
@EvanHKing YuckStarting to regret solely writing “OK boomer” on my primary ballot.“All’s fair in love and war” is a cute saying until you realize that it’s essentially advocating war crimes.
2/27
2020
@AFC_Imo @vohnjanceMisled is the past tense of misle.
2/26
2020
@evangrondner Say it to my face next time
2/25
2020
I like Vanessa Carlton
2/23
2020
The line in Star Wars Episode 3 should have been “The people I see dealing in absolutes are primarily Sith.” @_michaellee24 First ever? What are you, Mormon?
2/22
2020
I’ll admit it: I’m just at college to get the MRS degree. @Grimezsz #askgrimes Who would you say has been most influential to you as a music producer?
2/21
2020
Human life is ultimately a quest to find order in disorder.
2/20
2020
@krp47 Ya gotta put the important things first. Jobs are transient, Instagram is forever.I become skeptical of anyone I'm talking to when I feel like they have some kind of agenda.
2/19
2020
I feel like people are unfairly judging me just because I’m a bad person.
2/18
2020
Avid divaI’ve been really into performative caring recently. I think this move will definitely help my Twitter career.For my doctorate thesis, I plan to write only one sentence: Donald Trump is not the problem-in-itself, but merely t… https://t.co/hWlcZFQvPk
2/16
2020
The trick to be being a professional poet is to type words in lowercase, put them in a book, and then publish it.I’m starting to regret preemptively voting for Jimmy Neutron in the 2020 presidential election.
2/15
2020
TOP 10 SONGS OF THE 80s: 1. "You Can Call Me Al" by Paul Simon 2. "Born Under Punches (The Heat Goes On)" by Talkin… https://t.co/XJTcl6NuNjMCU is an anagram of CUM. This is definitely not a coincidence.
2/14
2020
It makes no sense to let yourself get frustrated by things that are outside of your control.Grimes's music never fails to put me in a good mood!
2/13
2020
@evangrondner Eat shit.Tastes so good, it just might make you a morning person. #CokeEnergy #ShowUp https://t.co/t3aZPVvoKc
Retweeted by Sean MacNair
2/12
2020
John Goodman should be in every movie. If you make a movie, you should be legally required to incorporate John Goodman into it in some way.Worrying about death seems super silly to me now. It's the one thing in life of which you don't have to deal with the consequences.
2/11
2020
Philosophy hot take: The Gettier problem is stupid and pedantic.I like the word ‘asinine’ because when you speak it, you get to say ‘ass’ at the beginning. @Grandpa Nothing is gayer than a mutual sense of understanding between two peers and a feeling of belonging and purpose.Just thought about how the interpreter of art is as much of an artist as the artist is.
2/9
2020
Our poop is made of star stuff :)
2/8
2020
This is good advice. https://t.co/2NwIFh5zY8
2/7
2020
@evangrondner Shut yo positivist ass up
2/6
2020
@evangrondner “It’s not whether you win or lose. It’s how you play the game.” - Joseph Goebbels
2/4
2020
Stepmom pets @CarmChristopher I’m conflicted about this video, because on one hand it’s funny, but on the other, I can’t help bu… https://t.co/yKl2SzfiIt @SaifSal3333 @FloydMayweather Your tweets complete me.
2/3
2020
It has been brought to my attention that today’s date is a palindrome. Obviously, I’m just going fucking berserk over here.
2/2
2020
@evangrondner https://t.co/5Jrq5mtu3K @Upsformilk @thomasarmacost1 It’s nice to know I have people on my side while I’m doing God’s work.Satire veritas
2/1
2020
I’m starting to regret voting for Bernie Sanders in the 2004 presidential election. @evangrondner You sound like Neil DeGrasse Tyson. This is meant as a warning.
1/31
2020
@evangrondner Usually coke helps me with my academics. But I guess everyone’s different!
1/29
2020
@evangrondner @FelixirofLife28 I changed overnight @FelixirofLife28 Really not into the whole idea of controlling population growth or there being too many people or… https://t.co/9lebIidToI
1/27
2020
People in Asheville be like 3 feet away from you and say “Excuse me”
1/26
2020
I feel like Trump’s presidency is like if the movie Being There came true but in this instance Peter Sellers’s character is an asshole. @Upsformilk Unrequited love @Upsformilk Whereas before, it just seemed like antisocial reclusion, I’m guessing?
1/25
2020
Rest in peace to the best dog in the whole world Goodbye Bear 2004-2020 https://t.co/tUlnPm1I9I @pant_leg @vohnjance just let life happen bro @evangrondner Pretty sure that’s already the plot of every show on television.
1/24
2020
@evangrondner https://t.co/LJOqilY2iA
1/21
2020
Blackstar by David Bowie is such an amazing album. Who else gets the chance to release a concept album about their own death?
1/20
2020
I’m convinced that the people who model for Shutterstock photos don’t exist outside of them. They belong to some li… https://t.co/xKak1KZTC5
1/19
2020
I’m gonna make a parody video about if Harry Potter characters were in the Do Lung bridge scene in Apocalypse Now.Just found out Ryan Gosling is not a young goose 😖😭😖
1/17
2020
North Carolina weather is exhausting.rt if u have seen seinfeld
Retweeted by Sean MacNair
1/16
2020

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