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Ben Acker @bnacker Hollywood, Los Angeles

CUT+RUN on Audible, an organ theft romcom/Kid Midnight, a webcomic of superheroes + FEELINGS/Thrilling Adventure Hour/Star Wars books/Wits/Deadpool V Gambit

2,561 Following   17,886 Followers   54,981 Tweets

Joined Twitter 11/23/07


Phillipa Soo, man. I swear to god.It’s too bad Harry Potter was about wizards. If he’d been all “you’re an epidemiologist, Harry!” we’d be doing much better right nowI’m finally watching Hamilton. I hope this guy doesn’t throw away his shot, doesn’t have any extramarital affairs a… https://t.co/t0H4SaDkqN @fred_belford Plum Tree InnBeware the ides of March. This year, they've gone all the way the fuck into July with no end in sight. @joselynhughes Oh no! In ‘98 Mandarin Place, disappeared overnight. Someone check on Fu’s Palace! Anyone got eyes on Margaret? @joselynhughes Do you have a favorite? I’m in the market @joselynhughes Plum Tree Inn @ultragrrrl Plum Tree Inn @Jody_Houser Truth.Sometimes I check and see if my favorite little Chinese restaurant has re-opened yet. Just checked and their websit… https://t.co/qCClsi137Z
7/4
2020
PUBLIC HEALTH ANNOUNCMENT If your mask restricts your breathing, you have it on backwards. Reverse it and you will… https://t.co/XhJLK9y875Did you know that John Krasinski wore a wig on The Office and nobody noticed and also that the cops who killed Breo… https://t.co/Ly85WjCSDT“Hey you ever notice how you never see the Marquis de Lafayette and Thomas Jefferson in the same room?” - some history dude @Buc07 @BenBlacker Sir, you are the hero Gotham City needs right now. @JayFaerber True things are true. @JayFaerber I know right? Set out, rather, to do something derivative on purpose.Don’t you love @Eleven_Films? They really need more followers to spread their impact. They’re hovering around 80K… https://t.co/CbYiSLyIWB
Retweeted by Ben Acker @JayFaerber Right? Why would anyone want the validation and excitement of being a part of something that made them want to do the thing? @JayFaerber 🎵🎵 I know, I know, it's serious 🎵🎵Wait. I found them.I probably ate themLast night I dreamed I ate a bunch of grapes and when I woke up, all my bed grapes were gone. @hotelfred Pork scarecrow! https://t.co/GxfzkNsce9Black people: Stop police brutality Ya’ll: Ok we will capitalize the B in black ✌🏻 BP: Stop arresting us for no… https://t.co/nYPWLa3Lg3
Retweeted by Ben Acker @jondinerstein Off stage doesn’t count. Save your fanfic! @jeffparker @HamiltonMusical Bonus points if Daveed Diggs does the fast-raps all during it. @DesiJed What is she a curator or something?Look I'm not saying the revolution should happen tomorrow, I'm just saying it'd be cool if did and it was because of @HamiltonMusical @MaryKoCo How's it going over at Wallbeeper's? @alicialutes Where did you get my dog? https://t.co/EDewIya4U7 @zandywithaz Like Jaws meets a game of werewolf.
7/3
2020
@hatethedrake The internet credits Dane Cook a little along the path, as well as a speak to the manager meme based on a haircut. @jetjocko You shouldn't need them from me. You should self-police! @jetjocko YOU NEVER ACCEPTED THEM BEFORE @jetjocko I'm making fun of movies, not celebrating puns.A teen sex comedy about a new girl named Mary Kill who transfers to the school.I saw the top of the head of this gif in my stream and was surprised, on scrolling, that it didn't turn out to be a… https://t.co/fs6KZdaSpB @PopCulturPriest Not legit. Quit.Can we talk about the person carrying a "mask don't work" sign but also still using an Umbrella? 🤔🤔🤔 https://t.co/AgYUKHiDg6
Retweeted by Ben Acker @SamMaggs When will that beeeeeeeee? @Allison_Tolman @ChaseMit @mynameisntdave Not a phrase, but the photos with an elephants or a giraffe are more ubiq… https://t.co/HO6WXnQWH7 @JeanGreasy https://t.co/GumSjKVoqu @JeanGreasy https://t.co/yfqPl1zMNW @JeanGreasy But... but... Okay.If he uses it's/its correctly, there is zero chance he authored the tweet. @Variety Next month? That's years from now!
7/2
2020
@MorganicInk Lucky them! https://t.co/3PtgYDXfjfI feel like this sketch doesn't get enough credit for the use of Karen as a pejorative today https://t.co/w7wwER8qnKSo Karen’s are trying to say that Karen is the new K-word and that it is more offensive then the N-word which is li… https://t.co/GF3PZso3Dz
Retweeted by Ben Acker @SamMaggs I hear that Canadian chocolate is the good shit.Where my #brandheads at? Time for a #brandreport. What's the most on-brand thing you did in June? What are your bra… https://t.co/sI7Nq2y8D5Start the week off with some good news! https://t.co/C5MFxw5l5AWhat complete fucking irredeemable assholes. Jesus. https://t.co/2OJbMW5GOZand even zeroer chill. @davidiserson @DesiJed Fair. I always wonder what fate I'm tempting when I block ads, but I always block them. I fe… https://t.co/jJBMvLeERh @DesiJed @davidiserson Those ads let you block them you guys.Today I learned that when it comes to parrots, Magnum has zero depth perception. @DesiJed Depends. Did you write a bunch of coal?Whenever I can’t sleep, I try to mentally draw a map connecting all the places I’ve dreamt about because I’m pretty… https://t.co/tHUhAwtQ64
Retweeted by Ben AckerI don’t think people understand. This is NYC right now. Day 30. In a row. The #BlackLivesMatter movement is just… https://t.co/TvdyY778S8
Retweeted by Ben Acker @edgarwright I love The Hudsucker Proxy!Still true. @rreed I thought it was gonna end up being a switcheroo.A pro trump ad played during Maddow like an ad for a pc in a Mac Store.Guys I’ve been using a toothbrush made for women for the last month and it’s better. It’s better guys. Try one! You won’t be disappointed! @GuanoLad He's been in twitter news recently.
7/1
2020
@KimmyMonte I guess if it was still in the corner he would have found it again. Maybe he put it in his pocket. @KimmyMonte Well? @kevinseccia I do. But I love quotes and historical figures."How about a little yakketty sex?" - the guy who wrote Yakkety SaxThis @Progressive commercial takes a turn. https://t.co/Ram1a9DoAB
Retweeted by Ben Acker @KimmyMonte Check the corner for religions.Carl! https://t.co/YDY3CzD5M8 https://t.co/boSHZfvdjaA lot of people who say “without further ado” have a skewed sense of what constitutes “ado” @biloon Don’t tell me, tell hbo. And Max I guessJust found out HBO Max’s slogan is “where HBO meets some guy named Max” and I don’t hate it.
6/30
2020
How many bad faith arguments can you cram into one tweet? https://t.co/xPSNVaIANV @HardHeartdHanna @DanielleNicki The show Dave took too many liberties with the source material, the movie Dave. I m… https://t.co/BN9qIWX1lZDon’t let the #BlackLivesMatter  protests disappear from our TLs. This is Minneapolis right now. These protests ha… https://t.co/uTcDbAWOnu
Retweeted by Ben Acker @McJesse Can you imagine if a tie did that though? Supes Hillars. @IAmJohnAles It’s 2 in the afternoon @IAmJohnAles https://t.co/Qk8Ks4YcaX @ParisaFH What means “good night?”
6/29
2020
Was it a thing on The Patty Duke Show that they thought they were cousins but they were really secretly twins? @mrbenwexler https://t.co/CiHWdPICwkToday I learned there is a David Caruso emoji! 😎Facebook has a newsfeed that is 100% saying what’s happening on twitter.Spaghetti becomes spaghetti-o’s via a process called spaghettiosis send tweet @Remender I don’t like that at all and I positively hate how it cuts off the circulation in my wrists and ankles.This may be my favorite tweet. https://t.co/MR99yUQAwqI get why people don’t want to wear masks. They’re sharp, they’re heavy, they take hours to put on and take off. Yo… https://t.co/17euJSuV9XThere’s so much. It’s all a lot. And yet I can still be mad that you’re finding a way to spoil Eurovision.Psst- I stopped washing my mail three weeks in.Cartoons are more accountable than police? The fuck. @KimmyMonte I mean that’s just the way he tells it.Post show energy during quarantine is so weird.Just yelled POW so loud i scared my dog🤷‍♀️#TAHLive
Retweeted by Ben Acker
6/28
2020
@RealClancyBrown Oh my gosh! That was the guy!Something I've learned while in law school is about the social construction of crime. I work in a legal clinic on… https://t.co/C4mdcVbdrA
Retweeted by Ben Acker
6/27
2020

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