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Lawyer man @BoneDoctorJD shooters shoot

Men lie, women lie, BUCKETS DNT. Basketball fanatic and future liberal elite. No tats on my right arm, it's strictly 4 tweeting.¯\_(ツ)_/¯ love @theriverjordin

1,181 Following   549 Followers   76,479 Tweets

Joined Twitter 11/28/11


https://t.co/CHmS7ldkRd
Retweeted by Lawyer manI’m so baked i didn’t notice that the pizza I wanted didnt add to the cart before I hit “order” so I just waited an… https://t.co/iyn07lcq46
Retweeted by Lawyer manhttps://t.co/CHmS7ldkRdhow do you fuck this up https://t.co/pTVDCNVCNv
Retweeted by Lawyer manGetting a day to yourself https://t.co/NTtxhqroCn
Retweeted by Lawyer manI love to say "sounds good" to my coworkers when in fact it sounds very bad
Retweeted by Lawyer manThe five-second ‘oh fuck I’m gonna have to say it’ pause is what makes this clip so very special https://t.co/Yt34k8qb2U
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/10
2021
https://t.co/u7QC2GRBum
Retweeted by Lawyer manA dude in serious contention at the Masters is putting with a fairway wood because he lost his temper and snapped h… https://t.co/KecP3IrIMR
Retweeted by Lawyer manmy mum's reaction to philip dying has absolutely destroyed me https://t.co/wIO3GbESNg
Retweeted by Lawyer manLove pranking coworkers. Lol https://t.co/xODBduMK1y
Retweeted by Lawyer manAmy Poehler ALWAYS understands the assignment https://t.co/jxCuT5zD1H
Retweeted by Lawyer manMeet Zephyr. This is his reaction every time he finds out he’s heading to the dog park.🦘 https://t.co/rG7w37ttCd
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/9
2021
@theriverjordin YesToday I learned if you put a bunch of match heads into a tennis ball and throw it against a wall really hard it explodes?god i hate online school https://t.co/cav6Ft9udj
Retweeted by Lawyer manmelting down at the discovery that hugh grant’s middle name is mungo. humongo grant. someone held a tiny newborn in… https://t.co/kfpcN4M53l
Retweeted by Lawyer manLmfaoooo Jesus https://t.co/Ar1s52TWvGDudes rock https://t.co/9KpHZJg9Up
Retweeted by Lawyer man14 QBs were drafted in the top 5 between 2009 and 2018. Baker Mayfield is the ONLY ONE who remains on the team th… https://t.co/ZT62Kr5QIy
Retweeted by Lawyer manStraight men will go on the vacation of a lifetime and not tell or show a single soul
Retweeted by Lawyer manhttps://t.co/zApbnG5W3r
Retweeted by Lawyer manfuck https://t.co/GnRb2aYFEU
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/8
2021
Whenever I see people talking about the “skyrocketing” rates of people saying that they’re trans, I think of this c… https://t.co/A17orpiQD6
Retweeted by Lawyer manA group of DoorDash workers is trying to game the app into paying drivers a $7 minimum rate for deliveries https://t.co/l1HZzxvml7
Retweeted by Lawyer manMood https://t.co/TBduFruQuy
Retweeted by Lawyer mani’m tired of being on the hamster wheel of working a job just to sustain myself. i want more for myself. more than… https://t.co/8zmZWiiyob
Retweeted by Lawyer mani hate that shit like quitting a job causes so much internal conflict. i wish our survival and well beings weren’t… https://t.co/NqEv6Pvq2i
Retweeted by Lawyer man*whispers* i just quit my job. i couldn’t do it anymore. every morning i woke up to go, i had to give myself a p… https://t.co/D94hE5pNEi
Retweeted by Lawyer manthe category is ex law school students turned himbos https://t.co/fy8FmaHPDn
Retweeted by Lawyer man👀 https://t.co/232jniyUn9
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis is sick as fuck lol https://t.co/JT5wTQHAk4
Retweeted by Lawyer manis this you, or just some other guy with the same name and job https://t.co/CgBGOe912s https://t.co/dcAAEW4RLh
Retweeted by Lawyer manPineapple farms looks like someone said they were a pineapple farmer and got caught in the lie so just started chuc… https://t.co/2bqUfLFxUP
Retweeted by Lawyer manWomen Posting Their Ws Account: 24 years old, sober, graduated MIT, and made a sourdough pizza today that looks lik… https://t.co/r3Zb0E04Ul
Retweeted by Lawyer man @Glo_glo_Gadget Love it, also your new @ is ELITE dude @theriverjordin LmaoY'all, pour one out for my dad wife, who's dreams are destroyed https://t.co/po6wpANXYw
4/7
2021
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Retweeted by Lawyer manjust found this photo of my great grandparents during the depression, so fascinating to see how people used to live… https://t.co/I6KACUvLNE
Retweeted by Lawyer manYou can’t just erase this from history https://t.co/57PH6phElI https://t.co/l6r1mM0bMv
Retweeted by Lawyer manme to any negative thought that enters my mind https://t.co/yDBOXk3yb7
Retweeted by Lawyer manJust got my first jab and am now prepared to kill for my moderna brothers and sisters, 'derna gang rise up
Retweeted by Lawyer man @freckled_frack Most employers will fire your ass without a moments notice. These are the ones who feel it "unprofe… https://t.co/HdzEqBfwYm
Retweeted by Lawyer manIn order to correct the cosmic imbalance created by @SCOTUSblog's horrific, amoral "Greatest Supreme Court Justices… https://t.co/iJAYW2d00j
Retweeted by Lawyer manI’m not gonna spoil too much, but the guy who proposed the Three-Fifths Compromise AND the Electoral College was a… https://t.co/W26NEAvSsF
Retweeted by Lawyer manDevastating that Yahoo is closing down Yahoo answers, since it's taking down the internet's Mona Lisa with it. https://t.co/uqlDzQdFqu
Retweeted by Lawyer manvaccinated!! finally I can stop using condoms
Retweeted by Lawyer manHappy anniversary to the funniest POLITICO headline of all time https://t.co/Df1bSDuCDL https://t.co/0pYLZZhXsn
Retweeted by Lawyer manthought id let you all know my cat is indeed, still an idiot https://t.co/rJMpMnBvn8
Retweeted by Lawyer manOH MY GOD??????????😭😭😭😭😭 https://t.co/vq4UUuG66i
Retweeted by Lawyer manMan what the fuck https://t.co/SiFDzJY0rA https://t.co/EoRZawa5y6
Retweeted by Lawyer man @nlebruhaha I just don't know how people had never heard of itThis is like tearing down the Louvre https://t.co/5M9Gm2oPb2 https://t.co/yzq1gJIxqc
Retweeted by Lawyer man @nlebruhaha What the fuck?just remembering the time Arthur was murdered by his own father https://t.co/XDi339n4lL
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/6
2021
Burn on, big river, burn on. Happy opening day Cleveland! #OurCLE @Indians @ClevelandScene @wkyc @fox8newshttps://t.co/KujgL25GtO
Retweeted by Lawyer manLoki’s time has come. ⌛ Watch the brand-new trailer for #LOKI, and start streaming the Marvel Studios Original Seri… https://t.co/HJGnw7Q3Nj
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis dude @evanmanivong sticking the landing and then whipping out his vaccination card is the ultimate flex. https://t.co/ul6NXkcS3Q
Retweeted by Lawyer manHowling https://t.co/2FOMTRPRDY
Retweeted by Lawyer manThe @alon_levy Midwest high-speed rail map https://t.co/D8LJ6mG4RI
Retweeted by Lawyer manBefore After https://t.co/4pQbaAHGMN
Retweeted by Lawyer mani like that in john's account of the resurrection he makes sure to note the fact that he outran peter on the way to… https://t.co/LkkAE5reHI
Retweeted by Lawyer manhttps://t.co/W6kKPDGOtQ
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/5
2021
Imagine this being comfortably the second best play you made in a game https://t.co/sMJMzNgHtQ
Retweeted by Lawyer manBiden is actively considering cancelling $50,000 of student loan debt https://t.co/B7ovhhYTmC https://t.co/2joxExqqbI
Retweeted by Lawyer manSo glad I am VACCINATED so I can use this street toothbrush without a worry❤️ https://t.co/s5GLlLwBfo
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/4
2021
gettin invited to stuff after my second dose https://t.co/iyGrA2uaF7
Retweeted by Lawyer manIt’s actually more impressive to get a date with your gf or wife. They already know you and still agreed. That’s a win fellas
Retweeted by Lawyer manOk you got me, I'm in https://t.co/RXF1UVgSd6https://t.co/SfjDOFFPRJ
Retweeted by Lawyer manI am back, bitches https://t.co/pi07pwZipP
Retweeted by Lawyer mani asked what he wanted to do for his birthday and this was the first thing that came to his mind. why couldn’t he j… https://t.co/qIFNjomL00
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/3
2021
#GoodFriday https://t.co/BL6jvIooKn
Retweeted by Lawyer manIf you paid $120 for a pair of Nike Air Force 1 shoes, you paid more to Nike than it paid in federal income taxes o… https://t.co/Q5MQsujFYQ
Retweeted by Lawyer manHoly shit Bad Trip is truly a fucking marvel. It’s as funny and wild and innovative as anything I’d expect from… https://t.co/fg56r1Lytx
Retweeted by Lawyer manWhen @SpeakerBoehner was recording his audiobook I was told by sources that during these wine-soaked sessions he wo… https://t.co/RxSafgyy3F
Retweeted by Lawyer manA dog in Russia grabbed the reporter's microphone and ran away during a live broadcast https://t.co/R1T8VZ5Kpt
Retweeted by Lawyer man👀 https://t.co/8POJ5l9uTB
Retweeted by Lawyer manWife just reminded me about an April Fools prank a few years ago where I called her in an absolute panic and made h… https://t.co/YGmHa3btzg
Retweeted by Lawyer manQuestion: Is the tone going to change out of the White House? Psaki: The tone for a bill that limits voting access… https://t.co/RhR9M6vFVc
Retweeted by Lawyer manCan they do that?? https://t.co/cbvZ3s340d
Retweeted by Lawyer manwatching a film from 2004 https://t.co/DV1NkkbCpK
Retweeted by Lawyer manOH COME ON!
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/2
2021
this conan o'brien prank remains the best prank i've ever heard about https://t.co/UlK1alK8nA
Retweeted by Lawyer manI had to do a Twitter search but my God, what an April fools joke https://t.co/OXiFyRE8EjWtf https://t.co/ppJBTet5E7
Retweeted by Lawyer manMy daughter quit the clarinet today. She wants to join the string section. I see she woke up and chose violins
Retweeted by Lawyer manhappy 1 year anniversary to one of my favorite twitter moments https://t.co/4bTb7RO1T4
Retweeted by Lawyer manthe word "himbo" gets thrown around quite often and is commonly misused. so Imma just toss this infographic on here… https://t.co/uV9n4vhZ1R
Retweeted by Lawyer man
4/1
2021
finally a way to experience shitting on the subway platform without the risk of arrest and prosecution https://t.co/G2dS65gazq
Retweeted by Lawyer manhttps://t.co/IFxJKsuXLH
Retweeted by Lawyer man
3/31
2021
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Retweeted by Lawyer man"different times in the same place" taken by Alex Hyner 📸 https://t.co/MbMVp6AE4f
Retweeted by Lawyer manMy job announced the passing of one of my (distant) coworkers and announced her position in the following email 35… https://t.co/XBsEP5Wp3F
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis tweet made me an antivaxxer https://t.co/llRoQrXUJt
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis is the finest moment of any nature documentary https://t.co/194NMDC4ud
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis is what long term marijuana use actually does to you. https://t.co/YifAtO4meq
Retweeted by Lawyer manThis person has spatial reasoning way beyond mine. https://t.co/pFkFCKl7jH
Retweeted by Lawyer man
3/30
2021

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