
![]() | when I was a kid I knew pro wrestling was fake but I thought The Undertaker was actually magic. he/him. |
@chokeofgrief Big relate.Youāve been warned. https://t.co/mIXluo2tzWEvery once and a while my mind will wander to Ann Wilson belting out āBlack Hole Sunā on Kimmel the night after Chr⦠https://t.co/bzbzkzDL64 @DylanRoth Ah, Bellllllllllla. https://t.co/35WcX7W81rdid a ghost detected by my cat write this https://t.co/YlHpJTb1QI
Retweeted by Evan Essence @atrupar Iām Kermit, who isnāt sure what this is all about or why heās been included but heās happy just to be in peopleās thoughts. @ApertureHeart You are wrong but you are brave to say it.Sorry for all the dong talk, here, cleanse your TL. https://t.co/IjwKQbKCh3

Anyway I managed to get back at it and finish working out, but I did that thing where I forgot if I was on my secon⦠https://t.co/oySQ4Y7m5uthe only "Putin" i want to hear joe biden talking about is when he's "putin" $2000 checks in everyone's hands
Retweeted by Evan Essence @mikelevelsup I appreciate it. My guy is gonna be like a star QB at training camp for the next few days: Strictly no contact.āThis is definitely in the top five worst things to happen to my penis.āBands: *SNAP*
Me: ARGH! *thud*
Caitlin: What happened?
Me:
Caitlin: Are you okay?
Me:
Me: WhuhuhuhuhhhhhhhMy exact reaction: https://t.co/P17AUPKCPjThe downside of working out with resistance bands: sometimes the strap youāre using to anchor them to a door breaks⦠https://t.co/uCELCu6MirZr, jura Xnguela Unua fnlf āPunbf Zntvpā: https://t.co/4Pr7XXa9BiLight WandaVision spoilers in Rot13 next tweet:Happy Birthday Bloodsport. š„š„ https://t.co/3q2HDhMwyx
Retweeted by Evan Essenceš¤ Mike Myers tbh https://t.co/Z42xBtaeSK @StillYourGhost https://t.co/yH3zPpDnNL @StillYourGhost This to me is as important a piece of Wrestling TV Ephemera as MTVās True Life: Iām A Pro Wrestler,⦠https://t.co/CLr4UJzYnEWhen the Senate parliamentarian got in the way of the Bush tax cut, Republicans fired him and passed it anyways. https://t.co/SNlSk7u0Gy
Retweeted by Evan Essence @StillYourGhost https://t.co/ffLV3XhfJg @StillYourGhost Yes. Watch that episode. Trent gets fed like a baby bird. @StephenRayGarza Somebody made a joke that TNTās next new program should be āThe Go Brian Danielson Showā @ginger_jewels Theyāre WandaVision spoilers in the rot13 cypherYou ever just need to hug a cat and let your feelings out?How can you look at the buildup of Shaq and how Paul Wight is debuting the exact same week Shaq wrestles for AEW fo⦠https://t.co/vknhBJfcO7Rot13: Vg znxrf frafr gung JnaqnIvfvba jbhyq qb n Pyvc-Fubj Rcvfbqr.Is it too much of a spoiler to say āItās really funny that The Scarlet Witch drives a Buickā?Muppet scrunchy face, RT if you agree https://t.co/DMLMY4OLAH
Retweeted by Evan Essence @jamesdleech Anyway āStone Cold but he smokes weed instead of drinking beerā is just RVD. @jamesdleech āMy joints always seemed to disappear whenever Jim Ross or Bruce Prichard were around...āHalf of employees who make under $15 an hour get food stamps, Medicaid and welfare. This costs taxpayers $107 billi⦠https://t.co/z94Msm9PhQ
Retweeted by Evan Essence





He posted up by the door with the lint roller and no one questioned a thing... https://t.co/q9zLdpNSE1
Retweeted by Evan Essencehttps://t.co/eN6J8dOY47 https://t.co/MiH4KGLcokIām trying to delete it sorry sorry Iām tryingSuper Followers get to see hole https://t.co/Qu9IQoDVOG @MarkOStack @uzionmain ROLL THE TAPE https://t.co/Xq2sEpUUqfThis is my Lock Screen wallpaper on my phone now and Iāve just been staring at it omg https://t.co/Wo7VbVNcHwTo be honest itās pretty fucked up that we were gendering potatoes in the first place. @EndlessJeopardy Who is J.O. Edgar Hoover @BotPops It was a Po-Light Roast.Whenever I hear people call The Young Bucksā dad āPapa Buckā I think of Amy Sedaris in āElfā going āPapa Elf!? From the North Pole!?āIf youāre one of those straight men who skipped the Magic Mikes because of the subject matter, ya fuckin up. https://t.co/pbd6evVRd5Now that itās been a day, when I first saw this announcement, I clicked through to the profile to see how somebody⦠https://t.co/ephIOTJLcscoming out of my Biden funded housing facility and i've been doing just fine
Retweeted by Evan EssenceThis is a question for when I get bored of this WRECKFEST demolition derby car game.Asking because theyāre both on Game Pass: Final Fantasy XII remaster or Dragon Quest 11? @EndlessJeopardy Who is Jojo Si-food.Any congressional commission into Who Crashed The Hot Dog Truck Into The Store should be equally comprised of store⦠https://t.co/DW5Yym5MZLQuestion Mark walked so Karate Man could run. @djsev *shakes head no*
Kah...Rah...TAY!Ah shit, R.I.P. Jocephus.When you lariat somebody so hard they end up kicking you in the back of the head. That olā chestnut. https://t.co/MjVe8LhHf7First it was THE ACCOUNTANT, which rules.
Now weāre watching SHOOTER with Mahky Mahk. Itās so stupid. I love it.The best part of AEW DYNAMITE is just chilling and watching the dad-assed movies that come on after AEW DYNAMITE.My lil niece is so CUTE and it kills me I canāt be in AZ snugglin her https://t.co/DABTSTLFqY @kathbarbadoro would be much more interested in Shaq teaming with his good friend The General
Retweeted by Evan EssenceI guess it shouldnāt be shocking that Fenix-Archer is really fucking good. @kathbarbadoro Like heās pass up a chance to be āCHRISTIAN AFā and reference HBK.Jericho was just jealous somebody was wearing an uglier shirt than him. https://t.co/Tg9o7s4HMu.@iamjericho @The_MJF beat up their brother Malachi next.What the fuck is this shirt Matt & Nickās dad is wearing.Oh no! Who spilled ketchup on apps Buck? #AEWDynamiteOk TBS, I see how this works. Make a show called "Go Bryan Danielson" next.
Retweeted by Evan EssenceMiro is just the fucking bestPopped huge for Darby Allin doing the HBK zip line entranceIāve had my criticisms of Griff but heās gotten better and more confident every time Iāve seen him, especially sinc⦠https://t.co/v2PnD2H5TjMe, after seeing that suicide dive: THATās who the fuck Griff Garrison is.Dexter Lumis looks like what Japanese fighting game character designers think white men all look like. https://t.co/CEWDZGL0DW#fireaustintheory
Retweeted by Evan EssenceMox sitting in a chair Cool Guy Style.Are You There, God? It'sa Me, Mario.
Retweeted by Evan Essence @Learnonaut Bet heās a Mario main, the centrist motherfucker. @Learnonaut First of all, this is obviously a case of putting the most SEO-friendly and traffic-driving phrases in⦠https://t.co/tSH0TEBqHP @sammgilmore Holy shit Slim1 star review of danteās inferno https://t.co/TsLqpxkSMG
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What a huge, huge episode for @JakeSomething_ on @IMPACTWRESTLINGNobody tell Scott DāAmore Iām skipping through Impact to watch the parts with @JakeSomething_Watching yesterdayās Impct Wrestling, which still has NXT Superstar Taya Valkyrie in their intro video.Lmao Max Payne. https://t.co/BBHVQJiy3z @JonHexLives Iāll expect heās going to be at least as big a deal as Taz is in AEW right now, and Taz was not a Show-level get.Okay but seriously, what was the last WWE video game without Big Show in it? WWF WAR ZONE? https://t.co/H5KMIK8ERt @1FACADE Very Bayonetta, as far as final boss vibes go.Since Iām positive Paul Wight canāt be āBig Showā in AEW they should put him in a mask and make him Big Van Vaper.Tired: āWhat if Paul Wight in AEW means theyāre gonna have him wrestle Shaq.ā
Wired: āWhat if Paul Wight in AEW me⦠https://t.co/vbsshRTfvBThree Indie Wrestlers With āChristianā In Their Ring Names In A Trenchcoat https://t.co/TPBo6UrYrtQ is a clit https://t.co/mGgQh6TPOA
Retweeted by Evan EssenceThereās winners and thereās losers, and he didnāt get caught on the wrong side of that line. https://t.co/S4MJ24I045FDA: āThe Johnson & Johnson vaccine is safe, and gives you a two-thirds chance of not contracting COVID.ā
Me: https://t.co/QSwVznJv5zSorry for posting clickbait but this is extremely Relevant To My Interests and I know some of you on here can relat⦠https://t.co/XzSaAq7iJl @StillYourGhost That thing where you can hear a tweet out loud in your head.Paul Wight leading Evil Dark Order (Uno, Grayson, Preston, Tay & Jay) against Good Dark Order (Hangman, Silver, Rey⦠https://t.co/siIaKVsl86 @TheOtherJeff This is funny to me because I just spent all morning building a spreadsheet for a Storage Wars-style⦠https://t.co/E9TdsJS9qa @Learnonaut Depends if they've kept up with renewing the trademark or not. @IoveIikebIood That's disappointing. I typically like Sapp. @IoveIikebIood Is this about Dave or somebody elseYou think they stick with calling him "Paul Wight" or do they go back to calling him "The Giant." I could see eithe⦠https://t.co/oOjeYE0VXAIs nothing sacred in this business https://t.co/Cyh1Lvp4LB
