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heap of steaming cow dung who writes sometimes | creds with @thedailymash @succubus_mag @bestgaylife ‘s Spectrum Blog and more | she/her

641 Following   182 Followers   1,513 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/8/09


@harrytrevaldwyn justice for tilly
11/27
2020
the human body evolved over hundreds of thousands of years so u can sit at a desk in a sterile cubicle and look at… https://t.co/MehNHHiLlw
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
11/26
2020
This week has been #TransAwarenessWeek so have a read of this: https://t.co/IT8gNRFK2Q @DomCarterAgain https://t.co/UPnxMyRDl6
11/20
2020
Cool tweet Boris https://t.co/sOBgK1pCLS
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
11/19
2020
@SophiePaynex lol same soph, wanna walk into the sea with me?
11/13
2020
Super happy to announce that I will now be completely disassociating for the rest of the year Thanks and best wishes
11/3
2020
https://t.co/7Wls6L98vmme every morning when my alarm goes off https://t.co/Lvo1e96DmJ
11/2
2020
@DomCarterAgain I thought I might try experiencing happiness but unrealistic @CourtneyAC @CarolineLucas can tell you it went down a treat in BrightonSince Halloween can’t really happen this year I want to shoutout to me from a few years ago and my @CarolineLucas c… https://t.co/za8TGP4KF0
10/31
2020
Friday night in with this one 🙈 need a glass of wine... or two!! 😂🤪 https://t.co/gVXJ6Apm5M @ElinorBoston drag em el
10/30
2020
what’s better than this https://t.co/5Gt7kqCGSs
10/25
2020
starving starving miners minors https://t.co/L1W3Ev3SYy
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
10/23
2020
@rhiannoneshaw not a phone in sight, just vibeswalked past someone busking Wonderwall and now it’s stuck in my head, can I report it as a hate crime?GOOD MORNING 👋🏻 anyone who can pls start ur day by texting ‘TRUSSELL 10’ to 70085 to quickly donate £10 to The Trus… https://t.co/GbqnM862eq
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
10/22
2020
@rhiannoneshaw https://t.co/gXKg6JdI0C
10/19
2020
@J_EganActor you’re not the boss of me 😡btw what do you do if you’re a 25yo woman and realise you both look and dress like Malcolm in the Middle aged 12? a… https://t.co/buScZdRf5Xgood for her https://t.co/R9p0BD9oZB
10/17
2020
@DomCarterAgain won't rest until this happens
10/16
2020
wish i could circuit break my life haha i’m very tiredanyone fancy putting me in a trebuchet and yeeting me into the abyss ??
10/15
2020
Help pls. When I keep putting off a task it doesn’t actually go away? Like I end up having to do it anyway but with… https://t.co/wq8H5Bek8n @SophiePaynex go on col
10/14
2020
hey fellow astronomy stans, mercurial is in retrospect atm so look after urselves 😞✨
10/13
2020
@SophiePaynex told me to be a cosmetic surgeon if you want any work done xhttps://t.co/0hcsPAHTIz
10/8
2020
haha yes i’m doing fine, why do you ask? https://t.co/931PeHCcEU
10/7
2020
@rhiannoneshaw Haha precisely yes. Perhaps you could send this to News Jacked, it’s a satire programme 🙂
10/5
2020
This is a hate crime https://t.co/WK1APjDr8l
10/4
2020
@DomCarterAgain pls don’t tell my mum !! @DomCarterAgain I will follow him anywherehiya just woken up from a 10 month coma, what i miss??
10/3
2020
“Yeah anywhere here’s fine” I say to the taxi driver who has dropped me 5 miles away from my intended destinationScheduling a walk into here never to return at about 2pm if anyone wants to join https://t.co/z1JI65GIP7 @JaxSayers just wish I was smart enough to understand 😞wish I understood this, can anyone explain? https://t.co/Gm9YxvoLsP
10/1
2020
just changed into my ~slightly more acceptable pair of pyjamas~ to take the bin out then changed back into my ~unac… https://t.co/NKL6tsUPE2it was the best of vibes, it was the worst of vibes
9/30
2020
hi everyone, just paid for an item that was exactly £1 with a £1 coin then said to the cashier “keep the change” a… https://t.co/6o3rPpLWgV
9/29
2020
https://t.co/o0Q9EP8XAj
9/28
2020
Will we use our actual fireplace? No Will we put a 10 hour fire video on the TV? Yes https://t.co/i8L71YTRJq
9/27
2020
will not rest until I watch the entirety of the shrek franchise on this screen https://t.co/FoLf7ZLx6c
9/25
2020
I also done this if anyone needs any tips: https://t.co/54iSnOmn3Aread my finest work here: https://t.co/bTViDnmYVs
9/24
2020
@JaxSayers ah yes because the virus only comes alive from 10pm doesn’t itWFH if you can? sorry pussies, i’ve got a pret store to save
9/22
2020
i will be using lockdown 2 to become an egg floating in a wet sack
9/21
2020
@callumfosberry preparing for a Florence and the Machine climax
9/17
2020
@DomCarterAgain respect our troops ✊✊✊
9/14
2020
@DomCarterAgain regular panic attacks
9/13
2020
@rhiannoneshaw the importance of being earnest x @ElinorBoston well??????
9/12
2020
I was super lucky to work on - and learn tons from - this brilliant book! Out in Jan ✨✨✨ https://t.co/ggFgF2Dge4
Retweeted by Chloë Porter @CourtneyAC my king
9/11
2020
World: *on fire* Pandemic: *unabated* Fascism: *rising* My boss: how's data analysis going
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
9/10
2020
@queeryingspace got to be poppers
9/9
2020
"I think raising awareness and taking away its power by giving it a name can only be a good thing..." Yesterday I w… https://t.co/mIaXht74sU
Retweeted by Chloë Porterfeel the urge to pour bleach into my eyes for some reason https://t.co/9K2lqz0Ji8
9/3
2020
@DomCarterAgain can prob fit you in 3.01 but slots are filling upanyone free to bludgeon my head in for me? i can provide tools
9/2
2020
@SophiePaynex "i'm a bakery slaaaaave"
8/31
2020
texts from your bank about overdraft charges 😩😍🥰💖💖💖 my bank account can be empty as long as my heart is full ☺️❤️❤️
8/27
2020
@Stu_Talks yes it’s time to get traumatisedby me, a twat without rich parents https://t.co/oI9DXtwEOv
8/26
2020
Mood https://t.co/NC89WGyXp5
Retweeted by Chloë Porter @ThatHannahJones @JessAtomic33 might as well write your obituary x
8/23
2020
tom nook is a landlord 🤢🤢🤢 cancelled much??? 😔😤
8/22
2020
my animal crossing islanders are all such losers, wish I could axe them GTA-style
8/21
2020
POV: you’re on FaceTime to your mum https://t.co/xP3LTEzK37
8/20
2020
thanks outlook https://t.co/6zV6CuIfGw
8/19
2020
me n the girls at lucky voice x https://t.co/IN4NzRmqrc @rhiannoneshaw 🤣🤣🤣 have you watched ‘I have got news for you’?? It’s satire @saoirsejosefine @MrsPhilPerry ur not getting ur filthy mits on my p cards 😡😡😡😡The Black Curriculum has released its first zine! Only £3 to buy, get on it https://t.co/kKBEvz7HaZoh to be a piece of lego living rent-free in a child's nose for two years https://t.co/Yxza4bCNPQ
8/17
2020
tag yourself I’m ‘engaging in lesbianics’ https://t.co/dgFirInp8s
8/14
2020
Congratulations to students from wealthy areas on your A-Level results! And commiserations to those from poorer are… https://t.co/4rpbfKonZ1
Retweeted by Chloë Porter @saoirsejosefine watch the fuck out SJ https://t.co/SGPQ2eVfL9sick to DEATH of being SWEATY, am suing ANYONE who said it would RAIN utter LIES I am still very HOT and UNHAPPY https://t.co/XIN5NJ1zZR @rhiannoneshaw pain
8/13
2020
@Stu_Talks i know like finally some representation??who else is a https://t.co/IfctPzKB5Tfun reading the fb comments on this has anyone checked up on Katools recently...? https://t.co/xGBdbWnHouhere I go again with the writing about my trauma: https://t.co/4YsQ2tpj4q
8/12
2020
wish i could FORCE QUIT my life haha :) i'm very hotalexa, murder me in my sleep https://t.co/2Vvmy9Iv96
8/11
2020
@queeryingspace welcome back to the hellscape
8/10
2020
@DomCarterAgain you can just rent them from blockbuster I thinkwrote this after eating a salad https://t.co/TVOvtXYMsx
8/9
2020
time to get absolutely zuckerberged with some factor 50 https://t.co/BVwLb4Vjdf @queeryingspace me to me https://t.co/CFJNNCWW5Nit’s all fun and games adding stupid songs to a joint playlist to ~prank~ your unsuspecting partner until you forge… https://t.co/A0k7jrymlmhave u cried in PE or r u straight
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
8/7
2020
Me: I love my friends. Their interests? Incredible. Their tastes? Impeccable. I would die for them. If there's a si… https://t.co/FH4UVfUPuT
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
8/6
2020
The amount of misinformation that people are spreading about the explosion in lebanon??? Here’s a thread about the stuff that is true:
Retweeted by Chloë Porter
8/5
2020

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