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male housewife @collegedormenvy juno/21/♂️/he/him/👬

the creator of the mirror poisoned the human soul

170 Following   96 Followers   29,488 Tweets

Joined Twitter 11/1/16


yall out here asking why everyone deserves atleast $15 for their labor and not why a single person deserves 100 bil… https://t.co/k9ej3IkxPo
Retweeted by male housewifeall fanfic sucks except for my little sister's shrek fanfic where he dramatically mourns the tragic loss of donkey https://t.co/hCzHt8Jiqf
Retweeted by male housewifeI extremely miss sitting on my porch and smoking a joint while watching the sun riseA man told me I had a "beautiful head of hair" today which was sweet but then followed it up with saying I had "ric… https://t.co/vqko6MLePZThe other night when I went on my Gin Binge I was convinced that I had fallen asleep before beating kaneshiros shad… https://t.co/puxhMz9w1tWhenever I'm alone at work like when im stocking the cooler or cleaning bathrooms I like have therapy sessions in m… https://t.co/4YGyrt26iRI really need to fire the therapist in my head. She is soooo toxic 🙄
1/17
2021
I wonder what makes a man see me taking out the trash & compels him to call me "sexy baby" or why they see me repla… https://t.co/aSEJdlfESlYou'd be amazed how often I hear unsolicited comments about my body and am touched without consent by men at work c… https://t.co/1DEpztmT3kthis is why i hate the whole "i don't dream of labor" catchphrase. labor is definitionally anything that expends en… https://t.co/bk6oJv9jt1
Retweeted by male housewifeno its not “nobody who works deserves to be in poverty. “ its nobody deserves to be in poverty period. your ability… https://t.co/X2PcStaIiL
Retweeted by male housewiferip lil buddy https://t.co/NgmO6HD7wQTo whoever left their half smoked blunt on my counter at work today accidentally I know you are having a horrible n… https://t.co/MGpERubAfS
1/16
2021
https://t.co/iMUykoGCbV https://t.co/7LXlcBACfP
Retweeted by male housewifeIve been almost 48 hours without a drink 🥳🥳🥳Sometimes I think videos of ppl sleepwalking and stuff are like staged cuz of how over thr top they are but my bf j… https://t.co/vJvRPB9Tqm @SERVANTNAGlT0 Thank u for the meal @sludgetears https://t.co/weAjyJ4aDxThey were both like over 2 years old and less than 7 dollars apiece so I knew this day was coming...both of my regular ps3 controllers broke so this is how we gotta watch netflix now https://t.co/zBwAWJvJsrrare and elusive night parrotPotato from Pui Pui Molcars https://t.co/rHdarqwn3a
Retweeted by male housewifemy bf looking at wiki articles of extinct/almost extinct species: oh yeah...this is a rare motherfucker
1/15
2021
@godrioting Omg I read this too fast and thought you were talking about me and I was like ELLIOT NOGO AWAY https://t.co/HXNt9Gmal7
1/14
2021
Twitter is actively performing psychological warfare on me by continuing to place random kpop and bts tweets on my… https://t.co/UjF7qhUll9 @twcpaeb @2 Completely unrelated but your hair looks so 😚👌 in these pictureshttps://t.co/YsNHJW5Xzy THE CUT AFTER HIS SQUEALING
Retweeted by male housewifeWe make 9 an hour yall can go straight to hellMan this email my manager just sent us in yhe work gc is the most ridiculous shit I've ever seen in my life https://t.co/dpN1LjDY8B @SERVANTNAGlT0 ME TOO HOLY SHIT @godrioting That color suits u soooo well @bigjoosypoosy I'm going to CRY!!! you both mean so much to me...I know I don't keep in touch often but you are bot… https://t.co/ToXmOUNeuL @bigjoosypoosy auggie im literally gonna cry... you mean so much to me... remember you and Venus can come to me alw… https://t.co/R7o5f8km6O @bigjoosypoosy I love you so much. Your kindness and care will make a difference one daymy bf, in his sleep and sounding COMPLETELY awake: ...hewwo? Hewwo??I sincerely, 200%, without a shadow of doubt in my heart, believe stretch marks are Insanely cute @bigjoosypoosy I literally thought u edited this picture omg...My priv is @friedeggsunset oomfies are free to follow ^_^ I feel like complainingI'm finally at ponytail length but im goin thru ponytail holders like a mf bc they keep snapping in half after a few hours of use?Ok does anyone with very thick hair have any experience with hairbands that don't snap in half after a few hours of wearI'm the only person awake in the house rn at 3 am and my dog just squeaked her toy and...im ngl that put the fear of God in me for a minIdk I shouldn't pay this much attention to celebs but the dude looks SOOO fucking greasy oh ky GODMan they really let the ugliest people get rich huh https://t.co/DOwpDYSDsQ
1/13
2021
@kirbyamsr 🥺🥺🥺 you are such an angel i am sending so many hugs and kissies @kirbyamsr Insanely cool/pretty name!!Time for a little controversy...I've been using tumblr since 2012/2013 and have never once used xkitI know my bf gonna be mad in about 10 min cuz I asked if I could set some alarms on his phone to wake him up to pic… https://t.co/EOGY4vBg4Dguy who is a wife
Retweeted by male housewife#冬の創作クラスタフォロー祭り https://t.co/eescw82UuD
Retweeted by male housewifeWhy is noticing that my pants zipper down so humiliating. I literally do not care when I see other people with thei… https://t.co/aTDxtgRRIcFor unhoused 18-23 y/o youth in Oakland ⚠️ https://t.co/KxAhC0wpbq
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1/12
2021
Was just informed that while my bf was a football player in middle school I was a cheerleader and therefore we are a stereotype now @spIatbrella Yes please! @SERVANTNAGlT0 Maybe ive purposefully blocked it out of my mind @spIatbrella Sooo cute... post pics when its done! @SERVANTNAGlT0 Zane this might be the tweet that makes me end the mutual. Its been a good run buddy
1/11
2021
My dad referred to me and my bf as his "nasty little housemates today"there’s no restorative purpose behind denying an incarcerated person real food. this wouldn’t be a meal for a dog,… https://t.co/fQVtzolIxv
Retweeted by male housewife @SERVANTNAGlT0 NOOOO @godrioting Thank u King!Tonight a man bought me a pack of cigs just Because @SERVANTNAGlT0 Thanks I got them from....you know what I cant finish this tweet @SERVANTNAGlT0 Thats not ryo that's Ron
1/10
2021
https://t.co/P8qlXTpznK
Retweeted by male housewifeI feel like this is a "say you have autism without saying you have autism" momentearly youtube my meeba fandom https://t.co/3u1bnG5XcITried colouring this but the black and white version is my favourite https://t.co/oPvroMXIwg
Retweeted by male housewifedonkeyslap bitches
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1/9
2021
My 93 year old great grandma made a fb and has around 600 friend requests right now. Here is a series of messages s… https://t.co/t7zdqLJ3MM @Iunateas Can't wait 2 watch tiktoks with u in hell bestieyou’re laughing? A grown man tased his own balls until he died, and you’re laughing?
Retweeted by male housewifeBREAKING: Current DC police officers just went on the record as saying that off-duty police officers and members of… https://t.co/seY5UVffRy
Retweeted by male housewifeMe and my bf have our one year so fucking soon @Iunateas Tell me about it brother @yungceliac Hi king I miss yall tell bridget I said hewwo @doctopmary I literally own one but hes not from an anime and I literally cannot tell anyone what character it is o… https://t.co/DJwdKTUutx
1/8
2021
Stop calling the cops incompetent instead of complicit
Retweeted by male housewifehttps://t.co/zT1oZuZgb1 @antihoa I'm having vodka and waffle house for breakfastYour images of the day https://t.co/5BjaPvKt0cIdk what it is but looking at my reflection in the bathroom mirror of a house that's not mine just really has me si… https://t.co/vGgTlRppiDSo capitol police can arrest journalists covering the coup but not the people doing the coup? https://t.co/9UsP21b9aZ
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1/7
2021
Social situations really got my autistic ass sitting in the bathroom on the edge of the tubthread of people who are helping people in dc
Retweeted by male housewifeWhen I tell you everyone in this airbnb screamedHe did NOT just say "we love you, you're very special"Reminder fo what capitol "security" in full military-grade riot gear looked like for Black Lives Matter protests th… https://t.co/qdGbe0kzV3
Retweeted by male housewifeNo I don't think it was some kind of innuendo bc he told me it was expiring soon and didn't want it to wasteI'm in Atlanta outside smoking a cig and a nice elderly man just asked me from his car if I wanted any white bread.… https://t.co/k4TCZOt868Looking at my bfs twin is very frightening to me in a way I cannot explainJust thinking about how many people were blinded and bloodied and broken all summer for doing far less than this https://t.co/C4MD8tAGN8
Retweeted by male housewifeThey didn't breach shit, they were allowed in by the cops.
Retweeted by male housewifeWhat da fuck!!!Big day for junos eye makeup https://t.co/mj7VrVYWTOAlright but who the hell is callmecarsonHeaded 2 tha big ATL todayTo whoever sb'd me for this I Apologize https://t.co/ja5mAi1jiFmy bf, pressing two plushes to his bare chest: honey they're stealing my juicesmy bf got us these matching necklaces & they came in today and honesfly its very emo middle schooler but I am LIVIN… https://t.co/ykEOGuesOI
1/6
2021

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