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I'm always jittery! It's my personality to be jittery! It's part of my charm!

3,268 Following   37,890 Followers   51,261 Tweets

Joined Twitter 5/24/08


i treat bedsheets like i treat cast iron pans: i wash my roommate's with soap and water @cd_hooks Thanks Beto! @johnnyrotten23 @compasolo 23% of post-tax income (about $38k) @BloominFreedom @surlybassey $50k salary in PA backs out to $38,700 after taxes. (210*12)+6500 is 23% of $38,700This is how you end up with shitty laws https://t.co/PZdT73skf0Got my debating boots on! #GOPDebate https://t.co/NdMyEmkT42
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀 @SamGreszes Subsidies cut off at 400% FPLDon't forget to vote!All of this—the emaciated public option, the federal subsidies—is for a scheme that pumps public money into private… https://t.co/4yxr6FTM39Under Biden's healthcare plan, a 27-year-old making 50k per year would need to spend 23% of their post-tax income o… https://t.co/9jLtNgptvr(Midway through season 5 of a show about how the grinch became the grinch) this is ridiculous, I'm out
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀The Rock was executed by Donald Trump for his role in international child trafficking, after which we was cloned, a… https://t.co/p9IQsfc1sL @osutein Houston, babyskatebart #comics https://t.co/ApQBmavErA
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀Allen Lazard is the only player with a perfect 158.3 passer rating on his targets this season (min. 10+ targets) https://t.co/Tf3RLgd6Fx
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀 @Jsfranz @ChampagneSharks I picked it up, thanks!
9/29
2020
@_grendan my favorite soy sauce trick is to combine dark soy sauce with light soy sauce (and sesame oil and sugar)wow. This foreclosure notice was written using gender neutral language. Bank of America thank you
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀Say what you will about Trump, but he comes from a tax bracket not often represented in high office—and that kind o… https://t.co/pYvsPbH49lThis sucks https://t.co/78DokuMBr8If you’re wondering about the current state of qualified immunity law, prison guards are now taking interlocutory a… https://t.co/J0EVthOsSG
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀I agree that they should piss test Biden before the debate. They should piss test Trump, too. Then they can auction off the piss @ChampagneSharks Thomas Frank did a great job of this in the early 90s in the Baffler. Maybe this is what you're lo… https://t.co/jqMs2MQJGJCongressional Democrats Threaten To All Wear Same Color If Trump Loses Election And Refuses To Leave Office… https://t.co/ZM8yDL22Ug
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀This wins over no voters. They're just doing it because they believe in it! They rub our faces in the mud, then tel… https://t.co/y0zp7OxwKY @JHohos it's meaningless but funMy man https://t.co/CF3D37FM3uThe Rock did a better job of laying out an affirmative case for Biden’s candidacy than every pundit who’s spent the… https://t.co/PW5iFrhwgp
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀3-0 baby Packers gonna do it Aaron the best in the gameLearning about Little St James made “Salo” feel much less shocking than expected
9/28
2020
At the drive-in https://t.co/Gh5vDdBJ9DThis is the church that has saved countless lives this week for us in Louisville. Please, please donate to this chu… https://t.co/jVI3fRiwp8
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀the Packers play at the same time as Salo tomorrow, which means I have a great excuse to be a wimp and look at my ipod during the movie @IHateNYT True or false? You’re full of excuses @videocrime That's the alarm. We gotta get this resolved tonight.My husband is Dick Dale, king of the surf guitarNYPD just did one of their organized escalations of violence against protesters but apparently neglected to actuall… https://t.co/7E3gfxShqQ
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀i've got some sour news about Trump's opponent's position on health care coverage in the midst of a pandemic https://t.co/DGhPxvYfGO
9/27
2020
Amy Coney Barrett... I can’t believe we’re letting someone on the Supreme Court with insane religious beliefs, like transubstantiationlmao it’s over https://t.co/99A6HQ8QFQ
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀This is cool https://t.co/LaR4LoBz1xfor the past six years, whenever i've felt overwhelmed i've listened to these six-minute-long recordings of cello t… https://t.co/u6oA0SaWqL @NickMillerMusic what a coincidence... J stands for "jriend" @NickMillerMusic i've got a letter for you: Jglenn gould uttering "duh, duh, duh duh duh" while he eats pussy @bridgietherease @RadishHarmers i've returned to these posts a few times todayPpl in Wisconsin called the state unemployment office *41 million* times between March and June. An audit has now f… https://t.co/yBnqllMBgx
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀
9/26
2020
@Vanessa_ABee these people have a disease @JoeBiden bitch @Venti__Poet I've got some sour news for you about Obama staffers @feraljokes i suck at it but i can see myself getting better. after 30 runs i finally made it to the second boss an… https://t.co/VFGhaESoWwjoe biden reveals controversial new campaign logo: calvin peeing on a single father with bone cancera small group of foxes have commandeered a used lawnmower and are driving it directly toward Redwallthere's a double feature of Salo and Climax this weekend. it's at a drive in so I can honk whenever I get excited @DisabledJustUs @roberta_sparrow no this actually sucks lol @Boringstein "Hi Nabisco! This is Tim with Joe Biden's campaign. Look, just say 'yes' or 'no' so we can get out of… https://t.co/BgIFOCmeUqthinking about textbanking 1 shift for biden purely out of spite, so i can hold it over everyone's head when they b… https://t.co/uBDoZREe0Ngoogle cloud is down, which means some dork who bought an Internet of Things fridge can't put the milk away because the door won't open @Vomax2k You know it @bornlost666 MDK2 @uhshanti "Yes, But" In My Backyard
9/25
2020
lol https://t.co/7b7EiDyz0dhttps://t.co/R4R8kG2Y2U https://t.co/rxDYr0wmuahttps://t.co/PPvwIL0WL1I don't understand why people like Cameo for reasons other than irony. I can't imagine receiving a Cameo and feeling anything but humiliated(this is similar to how Roe v. Wade is a protection of the "right" to purchase an abortion--not a right to choice itself!)We live in the "Bailamos" era of American history—nothing is forbidden anymore https://t.co/JzQPgU3sQhThat we're having a national discussion about whether or not private companies should be allowed to gouge sick peop… https://t.co/17LBHSnU1PI would note that all discussions of 'preexisting conditions protections' only protect one's "right" to purchase in… https://t.co/dLemnJnss6I feel helpless most of the time these days. So I take solace and comfort in the Reclaim Idaho movement, which prov… https://t.co/TC0BEOvoIMWhen we were younger, we were into birdwatching. One day while up the mountain we spotted a raven, we hadn't seen o… https://t.co/iMoRMVxklL
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀i'll post this again tomorrow but if you want to feel a little bit hopeful in bad times you can read about how Recl… https://t.co/HQMtkVQQCc @uhshanti @TenantsTogether congratulations, killer! @negaversace i've always been curious as to why people gather in a place that was specifically designed to make it… https://t.co/Z17wqbnpDU @tdawg6685 It rules tho @tdawg6685 I'm so fucking bad at it dude. 16 hours and I can only sometimes get past Meg
9/24
2020
Heads up, there's two "bail funds" in Louisville; the Bail Project is the one of the two that is actually effective… https://t.co/Crj97MnSBN
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀what if we just reopened the bathrooms in mta stations https://t.co/YNpjd6ChG7
9/23
2020
Beto not running in Texas is a big and shameful whoopsieIf only there were someone in the unique position to be able to drive turnout among Texas Dem voters... https://t.co/jhg77HMjZk
9/22
2020
I would love to be friends with an octopusBiden showed more balls in dealing with Corn Pop than he does when dealing with the GOPOh thank goodness Biden is on the case https://t.co/jNROld4Ixo @CorvidSandy @kropothead @SquilliumDuclos Can you guys take this outsidehttps://t.co/qGZRbdk75ZI don't know who needs to hear this, but here's the Red Army Choir singing 'Sex Bomb.' https://t.co/LIVoRc2fHT
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀matt yglesias's kid is going to be so embarrassed https://t.co/q0Njb9g2K1The Case For Pretty Hate Machine Being About Golf http://t.co/O6kQ2Im71s
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀one BILLION americans https://t.co/K8ZwtRrpXH @Arrianna_Planey Holy cowJust got notification that Blue Cross is raising my rates 25% in November.....I am currently paying $1391 a month—j… https://t.co/Vvrx2Y7eOa
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀I'm torn, because the Patriots can suck my shit out of a tube, but I love Cam Newton and want him to succeedI mean https://t.co/tgUHV3QnlE
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀 @boshj @zlingray listen to the man, he's right @videodante i'm so bad at it. i can only get past meg 1/3 of the time
9/21
2020
@irockgnomes @RoseLuxemburg1 mix the hot sauce in with the hummus, then scoop it up with your hummus vessel. @irockgnomes Basically any carb or fat @danepst1 @pinko_machinist China Mieville's fantasy/sci fi is exceptional
9/20
2020
I go back to this from time to time but this is the best thing ever written about Mitch McConnell and by extension… https://t.co/qdZ2M3adt4
Retweeted by 💀 tbone 💀is "waiting to see which judges die during the opposite party's tenure" a more legitimate form of governance than "… https://t.co/RIsUrgqIBc
9/19
2020

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