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john r stanton @dcbigjohn washington dc

DC bama living in New Orleans, writing about the border, sex work, and addiction. formerly of BuzzFeed National Desk and DC Bureau Chief.

4,610 Following   63,745 Followers   80,411 Tweets

Joined Twitter 12/3/10


BREAKING: A 34-year-old Guatemalan man who tested positive for COVID-19 died in Immigration and Customs Enforcement… https://t.co/p8znBOKYD7
Retweeted by john r stantonLast week freedom rider Sally Jane Rowley died alone in an old age home of Corona. In 1961, she was sentenced to 6… https://t.co/LvRyNXx2to
Retweeted by john r stanton
5/25
2020
@VitaVamp Ha yeah no I mean after the nightmare is over @VitaVamp If it’s not you should still go up there. It’s called crown. Food is out of this world @VitaVamp Yeah I thiiink it’s the same place? Though that part of Georgia used to have tons of West Indian joints @VitaVamp Yeah it’s still there. Or at least, there’s a trini bakery that has amazing ass foodDetroit style, because it’s a really delicious version of the rectangle pizza slices we got in elementary school ev… https://t.co/d0NeeoGxGHI ask that you read all of this. They all had immense value. This never had to happen. https://t.co/xfP0YQCz0P
Retweeted by john r stantonMy friend died of covid and all I got was this timeline full of assholes on vacation
Retweeted by john r stanton @sturgidson @theferocity DOOOO IT OR THE GIANT WANGED TRANS SEXWORKER WILL KARAOKE YOU TO DEATH WITH HER PEEN WINDMILL KICKS @ashponders @theferocity Because seriously you should have SEEN this lady’s wang. Shit was like 18 inches minimum a… https://t.co/5tyhV5UoPE @ashponders @theferocity Ok which partI was today years old when I found out The Last Airbender is not, in fact, a racist Steven Seagal origin story but… https://t.co/X0IUmYT0qW
5/24
2020
@OKnox @juliemason Ok if there was ever an argument for rioting to see your hair stylist, it’s this dye jobWe’re so fucked https://t.co/LkmGkAVjLL
Retweeted by john r stanton @prosediva @JPGOLDENCOCK Ha of god sorry I thought you were Goldenwiener. @prosediva @JPGOLDENCOCK That’s what I told your momI’m watching a @questlove set from a week ago and he starts arguing with himself over the first big sample of Ain’t… https://t.co/bY11v4hUTRBruh you’re a troll who goes by goldencock. You’ve never been anywhere near any of the lady bits to create a family… https://t.co/MOXTe5Z5Xe
5/23
2020
@ShillelaghMail @desusnice Where I come from cornholin’ is deadly serious sonI lit @paulfain on fire https://t.co/VdQxp9enCdAlso if someone can make me a sweet shirt that says “what’s the spread on cornhole” that would be awesomeYo @desusnice just said “what’s the spread on cornhole” in a not sexy way so I don’t know what more any of y’all ne… https://t.co/hr0RD9gdhY @laurenthehough @elizmccracken “Dimmit damnit not dimmitt you dimwit” is a great tongue twister @GregEnkler I definitely helped pay for their branding budget so YOU ARE WELCOME @laurenthehough Wait is that a real place or did autocorrect fuck up damnit? @GregEnkler My man! That is a solid maskSee this right here is how all good irish Catholic Americans should be lookin! Pretty and godly and masked up as a… https://t.co/aev0429biEAnd I’ll tell ya one thing for goddamn sure. If ya can’t stay away from the fucking bar long enough to make sure yo… https://t.co/YodAR0cCC5Nobody is asking you to actually put your life on the line. To sacrifice anything of true value. They’re just beggi… https://t.co/8xDLFjcNJNIrish Catholic Americans make a big show of our pride in our culture and heritage. It’s time for us to live up to i… https://t.co/Hcm9arie1BAnd it’s a moral imperative to stand up and say “literally all you have to do is stay home or wear a fucking mask t… https://t.co/pZRB2ITtcoMy family suffered through, and survived, the famine in Ireland, the oppression and destruction wrought by the Brit… https://t.co/IAwnyL0ptXInstead, too many, both in power and not, put the profit of our lords above their fellow human, above country, and… https://t.co/4cxV4UNCQw95,000 of our fellow Americans have died from a virus we knew was coming, we knew was here. Tens of thousands of th… https://t.co/uh3qmIXSa9
5/22
2020
—The Atlantic doubled its audience record, attracting 87+ million readers in March —The Atlantic added more than 9… https://t.co/N95NUjdvh3
Retweeted by john r stantonHell hath no fury like potentially inconvenienced middle class white personIf you ignore all the evidence then there's no evidence. https://t.co/0Q8rhXLLdG
Retweeted by john r stantonThe Last Dance already proved too lightweight with an infinitely more compelling subject. Now they’re gonna donate… https://t.co/oEfU7im3ey
Retweeted by john r stantonjust a reminder that when these media layoffs happen, coworkers on work visas can loose their ability to stay in the country.
Retweeted by john r stantonWhy Publications Are Doing Layoffs Right Now: A Thread
Retweeted by john r stantonTough note in inbox to read: the Atlantic, a proud title that has grown aggressively in recent years, to lay off 17… https://t.co/plSMlQ2CoT
Retweeted by john r stanton @CPTMoorgan I think so? None of them, I don’t know, he’s the army guy I think @wesleysmorgan @mitchprothero This is tailor made for @brokeymcpoverty @mitchprothero @wesleysmorgan Wow Jesus owls are freaky @JessicaHuseman .... that Large Marge sent ya? @ItsTheBrandi The aristosnots! @ashponders @lisatozzi @mat In my defense I didn’t think anyone would be listening to mount st Mary’s college radio… https://t.co/HRYojBwBwV @ashponders @lisatozzi @mat I also just didn’t show up or played some dumb dinasur junior record on repeat and walk… https://t.co/FZKI3JD8KE @ashponders @lisatozzi @mat I got my college radio station shutdown for a few hours by accident playing nwa on acid in 1991 @lisatozzi @mat Christian Slater anticipated every move anyone in our generation would make @lisatozzi @mat https://t.co/n0a6U93OwaMy friend told me he’d get these hilariously small royalty checks, like 78 cents, so I figured THE LEAST I could do… https://t.co/KO4s6eQGA8 @Clearly_Not_Rys Noooopethey still make those? @ItsTheBrandi That’s the angry murdering white lady thing right?True story: I have a friend in Toy Story, and so I always leave it on if it’s on a tv when I turn it on, & will som… https://t.co/qY4F6NlAZr @nycsouthpaw @mekosoff Wow solid choice @AmandaBecker @JFKucinich I would rock this @maeganvaz WHISKEY
5/21
2020
S&WB: New Orleans' drainage system severely hampered going into hurricane season https://t.co/tbLdEQ10CU
Retweeted by john r stanton @leticia @scottlucas @venessawong This is a very mean trick to play on someoneHigh fever, pneumonia, oxygen machine: @IvanNeville shares the story of his harrowing battle with coronavirus and p… https://t.co/u2HImbURi8
Retweeted by john r stanton @BsweetRT You know what’s upI mean, I grew up thinking most of the world was irish Catholic, black, and Jewish. so a show with sexy Jewish Cath… https://t.co/YDOXZtJSBPBased on the terrible accents I feel like they wanted the night sisters to be old Jewish catholic nuns from Eastern… https://t.co/ekL0s3ZHbjClone Wars writers and illustrators had some wild sex issues to work outYo why are the Night Sisters of Dathomir wearing sexy grandma drawers https://t.co/4oG6xOwh5Q @BelushisJohn Hi yes please send one of She Who Shall Not Be Named’s Rye children my way!"Passing readily from critical mistrust based on sound intellectual grounds to an unhealthy and hateful suspicion"… https://t.co/5ZT1xV4tQq
Retweeted by john r stanton @mollycrabapple Sister you’re tellin meWhat I’m saying is I’d eat all of you in a minor pinch, except @mitchprothero because he can get me meats and artisanal meth pipes.If I have a nice loaf of rye and some good mustard, I would legit be the worst person to be trapped on a deserted i… https://t.co/1VSpanUe8a @DouglasMGriffin That dude is NOT lean, niiiice and fatty @brittanys Your pop is coach! https://t.co/UW8AUAaxRfI’d beat a Protestant preacher into a coma for some moderately delicious rye bread right now @pmingram I’ll try and bring some delicious irish butter for you too @pmingram I’m definitely coming over with a 3 pound block of Kerry gold when I’m in town @sickathehighhat You probably think getting kick in the junk is better than not, based on this statement. @pmingram That looks amazing @ChristinLuvsSno @notUnitePink This is the bread version of sex @1redsquirrel My mouf is watering for delicious rye now!Somebody get @daveweigel on this delicious story https://t.co/ylJ2jr00X7 @brynstole Maaang Circle Grocery got all that good shit.Fuckin San Francisco tech crackers always pushing their bloated nonsense on usWhy is it y’all twete bakers spent weeks fuckin with sourdough and nobody decided to make a nice loaf of rye? Maybe… https://t.co/3o51kTa4aq @JoshNBCNews Yeah you rightIt appears that @JoshNBCNews lives in a horrible forgotten corner of the newseum’s crystal city space
5/20
2020
@miblogestublog @jdolcourt I prefer a dark mole but that’s just meNo mention of DACA or immigration status in this story posted... https://t.co/uyL9lINWLc
Retweeted by john r stanton @chillybatts SeriouslyOne of the reasons fake beefs between prestige columnists get so much airtime is because decision making power in m… https://t.co/ossDXmB6rz
Retweeted by john r stantonConversely, barbershops ARE hugely important to black culture, but you don’t see heavily armed gangs of black terro… https://t.co/QmrvyuSYdB @wdcscribe Fuckin love that placeI mostly have shaved my own head for more than 20 years, so maybe things have changed since the mid 90s. but I hone… https://t.co/PMXPOY90kX @MurphyWoodhouse @ashponders You guys are very observant. Might want to consider a job in journalism @diazbriseno Oh my god is nothing sacred @ashponders @MurphyWoodhouse Ahhh yeah good point @MurphyWoodhouse Wow. But also a third of those tested seems super high?Me. Jack Burton. https://t.co/qDyokfDqTxWell, the leather rack is still there https://t.co/ueGR9MwcgI
5/19
2020

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