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Philosophy lover. Feminist. Traveler. Reader. Lover of dark humor. Converted crazy cat lady. “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” flea/flea(s)

1,143 Following   689 Followers   12,356 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/21/14

@Lwhittenhart @WhenISayJ @WimminsRea I can’t wait to meet you one day, you seem so cool and smart and funny and now… 2020: Hi baby Mommy’s going to bed now so be quiet @Lwhittenhart @WhenISayJ @WimminsRea Hello 5’9 twin 😊 @WimminsRea But like “dating” (if that’s the right word) generally 5’8-6’2 @WimminsRea I am 5’9. All long term relationships have been with men who are 5’11. @pardonthefcuk Hi me @IanFromCT Heh. Nice🎃🎃🎃 @SuchiPahi @brianmontanaweb This is pretty accurateWas under the impression we all only wore clothes because we have to because society blah blah. But apparently many… need to believe in hell because there is no punishment on this plane of existence that will ever be enough to mak…
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃 @AlysonDecker10 Good reason! @thejenlife What is “minimal?” Like underwear? Apparently people are doing quarantine v differently from each other @AlysonDecker10 Do you live alone or with others?I’m sorry...only 1 in 3? I thought we were all doing this. @WWRBGD That’s the only way to beThankfully I have never been interested in godly men Unless it is Hot Priest but that’s just a whole other bag of… is your toxic trait? I have about a thousand but one more noticeable one is that if I don’t like someone, it… @sophilthy It been a while girl @JohnAtilano She is inspiring. Thank you for sharing. She has an awesome dad and she’s lucky to have you—just as yo… @EC_Carstens OMG. WOW. My eye was closed but it still has irritated it. Keeping a close...eye on it. 😂Parking ticket *****^ @AllThingsCivil PARKING TICKET TO BE CLEARGot my first ticket today. Surprised it took this long tbh.
@TabbyKeats I’d say his feelings are mixed. kitty is indecently exposed!!!! Had to cover him up!!!! is Perfect. @LeifTheTank Me too 🥰🥰🥰Getting in some snuggles before I drop Damien off at his temporary foster. I’m gonna miss my baby so much. 💛💛💛 @cjdcat Big hugs. Be however you need to be. Sending love.Brutal: Lawyers from Jones Day, which has earned millions representing the Trump campaign, have donated $90K to Bid…
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃Aaaaand. I am officially on vacation.3 days til I get to see my baby sister/partner in crime/fellow slytherin 🐍👯‍♀️🎻idk why i livetweet my brain. even worse what makes it on here is 0.0001% of my actual brain processing. idk why i… @ having anxiety about leaving work for a week for vacation because if I leave work nobody needs me and i feel useless @thegingerlawstu Grazie!!“What do you despise? By this are you truly known.” —Manual of Muad’Dib
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃cc: @TabbyKeatsAtheists of twitter - who are some of your favorite writers, poets, artists, etc for inspiration? Who do you go to… @EC_Carstens Yes, and we were also extremely slammed. Don't think he could've given me more time off even if he wanted.if my boss tells me one more time that he wishes i had told him earlier about law school so he could have helped me… @SuchiPahi @Spider_Goat_ @CuriousZelda bastards @WimminsRea i can't wait to show you my halloween costume @midcenturymoxie This is such a depressing thread to read wtf. @midcenturymoxie Oh and belting. I knew I was in for it when my dad would take his belt off. That was the beginning of the end. @DenverDunn4 It’s been a long seven months. @DenverDunn4 There can be no doubt. Might be the funniest event of 2020. @DenverDunn4 I realize this is probably not the most popular take, but I don’t really think there was anything wron… @midcenturymoxie I didn’t clean my room, so my mom threw away everything in it except for my bed. Not very effectiv… Akhmatova, "The Echo" call this one: I slept two hours and woke up to my cat clawing my eye, so I can only see out of one eyeball and a… Damn. Duck Philips at every moment but especially when he abandons his poor dog so he can have a drink unwitnessed. Bastard.Once, I forgot zoom was on and murdered my neighbor.
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃 @chartreusewahoo Yes @anxiouslaww Wow ur SO toxic @millcarek So good.Cannot express how exciting this is. I have spent my whole life trying to find lingerie that fits. And now finally… the underwear fits perfectly too!!!! Fenty has my vote for lingerie.
“This never happened. It will shock you how much it never happened.” One of the best Mad Men scenes. @Briefslayer @mami_esq @KatyAReeve @LCaffeinated Yes, Rory was sweet. Lorelai on the other piece of workOctober cooking tips
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃 @am_Dino_rawr i dont think I have ever had an orange mango LOLToday I realized the last time I had a vacation/any days off completely from work was one.whole.year.ago. Really li… @am_Dino_rawr It’s a mango and what do u think @sewimperfect The gif choice is quality, comfortable, inexpensive, make my 🥭s look nice - what else could you ask for? @QueenKutie55 I think that happens when they delete their account and reactivate it. @am_Dino_rawr cc: @MajorDenihil
Retweeted by Hallowe’en Fleabag 🎠🃏🦇🎃Ok my @SavageXFenty bras came and I am IN LOVE 😻👙💄Two years ago, today. Sunrise at the Waterfront. 😊 downloading a new pic/vid, where r u mentally? @blawlawlaw as long as it's been sanitized, i don't see the problem @blawlawlaw i am talking about chick fil a sandwiches, idk what u r talking about @blawlawlaw no i like it rawi had the chick fil a biscuit sandwich for breakfast so yes i am devolving into a fat pumpkin but like a fat pumpkin w a happy soul @AnalysisCreed 😢 @oshwin Thanks!Has anyone in DC gone to the free firehouse COVID testing sites? If so, how long did it take to get your results ba… @princessclerkTO u r the sweetest @_505atty okay this wasn't a cry for attention. sure i'm pretty. Jodie Comer is otherworldly. THAT IS ALL. /END @airned36 Hah. Thanks but no. Simply no. She is a goddess. @MusicAdamT @SuchiPahi @JCamachoLegal @TerriGivens @GINASMASH_ @WhenISayJ @TabbyKeats @mtlawmiami @mreno79 know I've said this before but why can't I be as beautiful as Jodie Comer. It is simply UNFAIR. @AnnaIBurke I snorted out loud @_sparklyhuman you look great. if he's got a problem with it, he's the problem. not you. @_sparklyhuman THE AUDACITY OF MEN wtf. Fuck him.Happy Monday fools let’s get this bread @piversuspie The key lime pie...I could weep @MajorDenihil @MajorDenihil Now that I get the joke, I am laughing @piversuspie Mmmmm. Yes. @lucasdrayton Brilliant @MajorDenihil Like my fatass needs it @SuchiPahi HAHA. Love it. 😂 @K_NoiseWaterMD Hai 😻😻😻I should go to sleep but I want to instead do other things but have nothing else I feel like doing. What do I do?Today I confirmed what I have always suspected. You do NOT have to be intelligent to have a CPA. No offense to CPAs…