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Doofus | SadSack on @criticalbitcast | Comedian? | Invented saying "nice" about 69 | he/him | There's a reason it's not "hashtagtext" | Inaction Enthusiast

251 Following   504 Followers   4,707 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/31/15


@OxyOxspring @joelwruiz @plentyofalcoves @ellameno @CriticalBitCast Ok surely we can fix this with internets. @plentyofalcoves Omfg. Yes. @RebsParks @shelpylee I believe so, but people always do. @shelpylee Well this is what I deserve for not showing up to the polls on time.The Green Party scooping up "your" votes is like crying about the Washington Generals dunking on you. It's embarras… https://t.co/h6aBKQFhwg
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/27
2020
[Phrenology never left, but it's still wild.]Hey check it out y'all, phrenology is back, but now with everyone's favorite grift, mAcHiNe lEaRnInG. https://t.co/wn3T6NB3nKhttps://t.co/aQdtOniVKj https://t.co/cS4oYXpZFK
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/26
2020
A lot of leftists are offering to vote for Biden for cash Well I can do better than that! Give my show @nsfwonks $… https://t.co/VNN4xwi7u4
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babieswas explaining “if you snooze you lose” to french husband and he said “so basically it’s if you are sleeping, fuck you”
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babiesthanks everybody for the fantastic p*dc*st recom*en*at*ons yesterday! i got literally hundreds of dms from a lot of… https://t.co/OzfqmpfNfJ
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @shelpylee @joelwruiz @EvanBrandoShow @LoanWolfKevin @plentyofalcoves Dear PBTA, LLC. I hope this letter finds yo… https://t.co/EaLdzgoRlG @PaperBallotsGA @markniesse Also: how long was this in development for and does it actually work?Oh good, Grift and Graft have teamed up to bring you the solution to your concerns: It's an app that almost surely… https://t.co/jSzNyZJI2EAn article titled "how to spend less money on books" and "The Public Library" doesn't even make the top five.Can you distinguish crime from business in a meaningful way?Fellowship is a very very cool game you should try it. https://t.co/3zHJjDaiiA
9/25
2020
@Evanszanycomedy All your dang tweets are all flytraps, as it turns out. @Evanszanycomedy As you may have heard, @CriticalBitCast is Earth's Favorite corndog-themed anti-capitalist teen su… https://t.co/siw3qFDLR3 @Evanszanycomedy That is a flytrap.Do you think Yoshi is soft or muscly? Scaly or soft like velvet? The Forbidden Texture.
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/24
2020
We set the new date for #CritBitsCon. Join us Dec 3rd-6th on our twitch as we raise money for @HighlanderCtr! Nov… https://t.co/Lvi2GeIRbt
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesWe either rescued this cat or stole it but it's ours now. https://t.co/qzpbkLN0Zw @islandgoth @DerickMarchel Hunting for sport is immoral. Gotta eat what you kill. @JonahMJackson @CriticalBitCast @eddief419 @bomBARDedcast @Boognish_Theory Classic TTRPG trope characters: Halfilin… https://t.co/3BkFkjj81I @BlueGuitarPick The double nil theory of electoral politics: nobody wants to be King of the Trash Fire come Jan 2021.I remember the first albatross I ever saw.
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesThere ain't no party like an Antifa party because Antifa parties scare cops. https://t.co/EDqWTZvXGV
9/23
2020
Check out Episode 46: Also The Sentinel Too featuring @harlack as The Sentinel. #CriticalBitCast https://t.co/z5F8ZNLs24
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesSomething for everyone on comedy, tonight! https://t.co/COw40Ism23
9/22
2020
@EvanBrandoShow @CriticalBitCast @plentyofalcoves @shelpylee And yes before you ask I'm bigger on the inside. @EvanBrandoShow @CriticalBitCast @plentyofalcoves @shelpylee Inside of me there are two Alexi Sayle @CriticalBitCast @plentyofalcoves @shelpylee Torn between "Gun Alex" and "Liar Alex"Also, yes, we will be doing a special bonus episode this year where @plentyofalcoves @shelpylee and @hashtagsubtexthttps://t.co/tR2oQLlIn9
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesI'm from Georgia. No, not the one in Europe. I'm from the Bad Georgia. https://t.co/yHzAnco8WwThis strikes me as less moral than most crime. https://t.co/S3OcyA2wEUWho is ready for #Acetober!? Starting on October 1st, we'll have these daily prompts. Can't draw? Don't worry! Th… https://t.co/L5rqMLx4Iv
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babiespossibly we should stop saying “the algorithm” and start saying “the way people programmed the app”
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @OxyOxspring @plentyofalcoves We probably do but it was fun to type this @OxyOxspring @plentyofalcoves The U.S. does not have Balls or a Balls analog.
9/21
2020
@OxyOxspring @plentyofalcoves Think of how Senator Grassley must feel.It is just bizarre how eager many media elites and establishment liberals are to deny the degrading effects of mate… https://t.co/j3OqX6d9GC
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesWhen you know you’re about to see some progressive tweets https://t.co/Tr6geIa9yv
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babiesvery helpful advice for a nomination process that could occur before election day thank you https://t.co/ahWKxyqHiZ
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesI now h v an iphone
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesUrsula K. Le Guin’s thoughts on JK Rowling’s writing are brutal https://t.co/eRXNixUccV
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/20
2020
So, the takeaway from #TheRock ripping his gate down is not that he is strong (he is), but that luxury compound ga… https://t.co/atl5HKoDRiIt is the easiest thing in the world for a man to look as if he had a great secret in him.
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesSo unfortunately, after we sent out the article for @cornellartworks "The Devourer", our Art Director @LVBulldoppshttps://t.co/avsXNc8eFa
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @ChrisLedf Warnock and Jalad at Tenagra @worstgeneratio Luxuriate in rest, it is not shameful. (I also hope you feel better, I'm a fellow stress sleeper)Where's the "wear a mask" discourse? https://t.co/0Sav4T0pQo
9/19
2020
Just woke up, haven’t had a chance to check the news but just wanted to remind you all to vote because the Supreme Court is at stake
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @RebsParks @CriticalBitCast A.S.S.E.S. are legion.Looks like #Acetober it is! Streak Shark was a close second, but don't count him out yet! https://t.co/pTSIeHUx26
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @dlock_art @bibliophage413 @CriticalBitCast I find them less rotten, but with a similar capacity to spread their condition to the bunch. @RebsParks @CriticalBitCast Nah for real though doing those won't be as well rewarded and become tedious due to the… https://t.co/e300TE6uRQ @RebsParks @CriticalBitCast Unfortunately #streaksharktober has become somewhat of a tradition with the Associated… https://t.co/rPLWo1SlHZ @bibliophage413 @dlock_art @CriticalBitCast Oh hey sorry I should have checked earlier to see if y'all liked apples… https://t.co/e1678KKcPu @bibliophage413 @dlock_art @CriticalBitCast #streaksharktober 2 Jimmy Buffett Jimmy Buffett Buffet Shark Tank Shar… https://t.co/OnbSZPAVaa @bibliophage413 @dlock_art @CriticalBitCast #streaksharktober at the bank in the woods watching a parade doing sta… https://t.co/WU0ScXoQSx @emunarum I wouldn't know, I'm a bag man
9/18
2020
@emunarum I dare not tread this hallowed ground again, last time I questioned animal clothes I almost lost my spot on the show. @emunarum @albinosoundguy @bibliophage413 Decidedly not. @emunarum @albinosoundguy @bibliophage413 And besides, it seems unlikely that you'd have 31 different outfits that… https://t.co/EvWpEMZOM9 @emunarum @albinosoundguy @bibliophage413 Heresy!
9/17
2020
some #VentureBros pride edits cuz vbros belongs to the gays, baby!!! https://t.co/pe3X4UQvyn
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @plentyofalcoves @CriticalBitCast I don't know but at least the universe routinely punishes him for it. @bibliophage413 @CriticalBitCast The four main Critical Bits characters Ace Kim No Streak SharkGive life to the dream that is #streaksharktober https://t.co/4ncqjmvckF @bibliophage413 @CriticalBitCast As it appears streak shark is currently in second place. @bibliophage413 @CriticalBitCast Oh I meant this as admonishment for including clear spoiler candidate Streak Shark… https://t.co/RUaRXWLB2qWe wanted to gauge interest for Oct of this year! We had a blast with #Sacktober last year and would love to do it… https://t.co/UkiICZtXNC
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @CriticalBitCast Joel.This really makes some folks look guilty as shit but the penalty for destroying evidence aren't as strong as you'd… https://t.co/6HE2VxkISV
9/16
2020
https://t.co/oItn7YWNQw
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesThe problem is not that there is no common ground but that the common ground is a shallow grave. https://t.co/PWSvY6Dw5D
9/15
2020
It is illegal for employers to fire or otherwise retaliate against employees for organizing their coworkers or atte… https://t.co/Nzvg1sqwS1
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet BabiesDeclaring an early and unprecedented winner in this year's War on Christmas. Spoiler alert: Christmas lost. Big time. Buckle in.
9/14
2020
@worstgeneratio I would watch this tiktok house's streams for sure.
9/13
2020
Good term, good thread. https://t.co/DTlVYB0tPdnew video essay up about The Venture Brothers https://t.co/0pi1usrKLu brb going on hunger strike outside williams… https://t.co/0Jkgjzyumf
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @plentyofalcoves @joelwruiz Not as strong a store of value as you might hope.This is a form of violence against the #multibev values that joel claims to espouse. https://t.co/jzFnPIYdIUgetting so disrespected rn https://t.co/XTwen8GDbM
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/12
2020
@islandgoth Of course! I figured your dms are clogged with people wanting free shit from someone in the Oldest Prof… https://t.co/fKmdl3IiEBThere are three different grad students sitting in my DMs asking me to write at great length for their papers about… https://t.co/7dI3HGHXNA
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @islandgoth (you were real good on the podcast btw)When @PFTompkins as Blue Morpho said "It's another THINK coming!" to Scaramantula and shot him I stood up and appla… https://t.co/Ti5rMoAlGy @plentyofalcoves @gantzgraf213 @ningenmusic ~~~Sharky's Machine~~~ @plentyofalcoves @gantzgraf213 @ningenmusic That there is so much in s7 that ties back to s1 is the saving grace of… https://t.co/9srv8vPRVf @plentyofalcoves There is no good news, only bad news and weird news!watching this clip and crying cause a cartoon I really like got cancelled https://t.co/S06OnimJ55
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @joelwruiz Did someone say New Shoes?
9/11
2020
Oregon shouldn’t look like the surface of Mars but think about what fixing that would do to the deficit
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies @flynn_jason But, Canonically, Zephram Cochrane should be alive right now. @flynn_jason This is more of a "Far Beyond The Stars" situation. @flynn_jason Bell Riots WHEN? @flynn_jason If only our premise were as plausible or interesting.
9/10
2020
Setting MAJOR precedent, Portland, Oregon has banned both private businesses and the city itself from pursuing or i… https://t.co/Wdefg1qqWE
Retweeted by Paul Byron's Melville Muppet Babies
9/9
2020

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