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Ian Berriman @ianberriman The Valley Of Despair

D-grade work unit for @SFXmagazine, since 2002. Bits for @TotalFilm, @ElectronicMagUK. @TOTPFacts tweeter. Helped save @HullCity's name. I am NOT a Merry Man.

627 Following   2,755 Followers   53,063 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/29/09

@MrsSteveMOBrien 70th to Jonathan Richman, unwitting progenitor of one of Legs & Co's most literal routines.
Retweeted by Ian Berriman🚨 | ON THIS DAY: 20 years ago, John Prescott punched a voter in Rhyl after he threw an egg at him Via…
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @prkirkley Pretty sure the book of them is now so thick that this will be listed as a psychological disorder. Extra… @senrab_nala The restoration is good. The film is good, but also quite mental, plot-wise (and acting styles, unsurprisingly)Watched: on this thinking "Well, I've got it narrowed down to Kill The Bill or Lockdown" and was way off. #Bristol @prkirkley Does she also order battered fish and chipped potatoes twice? #callback
@bobby This genuinely was a Christmas present for a girlfriend. I can supply a witness statement if necessary. overnight in an abandoned psychiatric hospital. is mental. @CatzCaroline 's Delia Derbyshire - the myths and the legendary tapes - BBC4 - 9PM - Sunday…
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanDavid (@weddingpresent) scores 7/10 in an @NME quiz about TWP: “I remember sitting with Mark E. Smith in a pub once…
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanAll the sports equipment I could want (after about 12, none), use of school’s BBC computer, access to photocopier t… @ellenstarbuck A 3-D printer. Then get a refund on the original 3-D printer. Drop. The Knife. @Slippery_Jack @SarahDobbs @AndyLonsdale7 Stick with the 17 episodes of The Prisoner. @TheSevateem Just spell it Gallifree like the Tom Baker pronunciation.
@edgarwright I’ve only just realised someone’s photoshopped smut into that. @edgarwright Same energy. the latest edition of Private Eye - pick up your copy over the weekend.
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Retweeted by Ian BerrimanYeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah not touching that debate with five bargepoles gaffer-taped together.I didn’t realise that in my 60’s people would be shouting ‘Of Course They Fucking Do’ at me. #TimsTwitterListeningParty
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @stephenkb I rather imagine 99.9% of the electorate won't "look back on last weekend" at all. Shadow Cabinet reshuf… know that doesn't make sense because this actually does come from India, take it up with my unconscious ok?Could not read this without thinking of "Mr Everything Comes From India" from Goodness Gracious Me. @chloeingram To be fair my original tweet was me (Labour member) taking the piss out of a Labour MP, and I had my t… @chloeingram You're right of course, I need to put some thought into working out a sliding scale. 😉 @hellothisisivan Oh god, such a ballache. PLUS he has a name EVERYONE pronounces incorrectly. "Er, no, I think you… trying to crunch the maths on whether having 5 likes, but one is by a Tory MP, means I actually have about -495… here's Colchester's Modern English standing about in oilseed rape in 1990 (thanks @littletnoee). I should proba… NEWS: Glasgow's @TeenCanteen have sensibly capitalised on the marketability and (thanks to this thread) cu…
PREMIERE tomorrow Fri-14-May 9pm DEATH LINE (1972) #DonaldPleasence #ChristopherLee
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Retweeted by Ian Berriman @The_X_Stitcher Never ask an open question on the internet. @jon_trickett I've crunched the maths and the average human lives for 692,040 hours. So (taking into account the hi… issue of @ElectronicMagUK sound has arrived 🎯 This month's issue includes a Can 7" single on purple vinyl 🟣…
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @crinolinerobot This morning I was chuckling to my myself "Thank god, that didn't happen 8 days ago". Ouch. 😬Stumbled upon this while doing a bit of video nasties research, and obviously I had to buy one.… @SaucySeventies Though I would question why he sees the biker gang arriving at 0.07, and five seconds later decides… @SaucySeventies After googling Clapton Plastics and doing a lot of squinting, my best guess is that Ladder Man is a… @james_blue_cat Good luck coping with tomorrow's Netflix announcement about their new 10-part series with the same storyline.My favourite
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Haircut tomorrow. Looking forward to no longer resembling Ronnie Biggs circa 1978.This was one of my paper ideas and some guy on Reddit just went and did it
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanStrawberry Switchblade, Muswell Hill.
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanWed 12th May 2021. Dear my diary, Finally located ground zero when it came to the odd smell emanating from behind…
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanDon't miss this upcoming @BBCFOUR4 programme about Delia Derbyshire on May 16th And don't…
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanStop that pigeon now @alextohme It's more likely that you've lost grasp of reality, Alexandra. @vickie19761 This won’t be so funny once the seagulls realise that human flesh is even better than sandwiches.
@DrMatthewSweet @BBCRadio3 presume all those who were totally opposed to vaccine passports for access to pubs last week will be totally oppo…
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @MayorofLondon I hope you kept the receipt.Just booked a cinema ticket.Just hanging around: Ralph Bates takes his lunch break standing on director Jimmy Sangster’s shoulders on the set o…
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@lisanandy Just leaving this here for some of the shrieking twits in the replies. @nypost Amazing, can’t believe that woman in the blanket is him. @CNBC
Retweeted by Ian BerrimanSound miserable, like the rest of us. @twlldun Things being old doesn't mean they're good or valuable, anyway - just look at us miserable bastards.I can't really deal with film reviewers who always sound breezily cheerful, like they're just about to skip off int…
If Columbo were anime:
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @simonblackwell Or maybe Ian Berriman, 1973-1947 / Pioneer of time travel. @simonblackwell Ian Berriman, 1973-20,937."And you'd think the locals would be keen on the redistribution of wealth"
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @OldRoberts953 I literally had to google "Shadow Home Secretary" yesterday. I think they must keep him locked in a cupboard. @darren_scott AWWWWWW COME 'ERE YA BIG LUGWatching: @MattParish76 Don’t try and confuse me with science. @MattParish76 I’m still alive, which I think you’ll find is conclusive proof it was good strategy. @missdaisyfdoo You don’t know where those shelf-stackers have been.Cc @YouHadOneJob @220_d_92_20 @BritainElects @OxfordshireCC Or a duel with muskets I think, if you check the small print.What’s the Covid-era habit you’re going to find hardest to break? For me it’s a toss-up between unnecessarily washi… off the Yorkshire Party a bit now I’ve realised they’re based in Harrogate. @RichNeville Congratulations. Though Marvin Rees can just overrule anything of course...In the UK, the 7 day rolling average of Covid-19 deaths has fallen to single digits for the first time since September 7th.
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @TristanCorkPost Mad Max Thunderdome to decide it.Congratulations also to Tessa on being absolutely textbook Green-looking here. Lovely work. wrestle for it guys. possible the Greens could get an MP in Bristol West next GE (boundary changes permitting), if they could just… out over the Yorkshire Party coming third in the West Yorkshire mayoral election, with nearly a 10% share o… good, another Northern by-election in a Labour seat soon. (incumbent Labour MP is now West Yorkshire mayor) @MrKenShabby <Welsh assembly pedantry>Also Neil should probably have both hands up here. </Welsh assembly pedantry> @mrsosodeaf It’s on the old DVD of “The Two Doctors”, but what you’ve seen on YouTube will be the full thing. It’s… Council’s gone No Overall Control then... @BritainElects Did a Lib Dem councillor garrotte a kitten or something?!Yep. Not even close. with mum:, London. tweeting "What are Labour saying about THIS?!?" rather than googling "THIS+Labour" is a surprisingly common syndrome.A guard of honour for the champions! 👏 #EFL | @HullCity
Retweeted by Ian Berriman @Natt I just throw it up in the air and swing a tennis racket. @JDBakewell Er, this?