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Jason @jason1749 Infinite Tarantula Island

The lobster has limited telepathy, though it cannot explain how it came to have this ability. // he/him bottom text

1,396 Following   1,471 Followers   293,998 Tweets

Joined Twitter 6/21/07

Yeah, but they also said they identified themselves while knocking on Breonna Taylor’s door, so...How can I even be…
Retweeted by Jason @FrostyJane's tricky to argue that paying a fine to restore someone's eligibility is "paying them to vote" without accidenta…
Retweeted by Jasoni believe the proper phrasing is that there has been an officer involved shooting
Retweeted by JasonPF Chang's waiter: "[Recites specials] Stephen A. Smith: (Acts surprised) "To me, that's preposterous. Crab Rangoon, things of that nature."
Retweeted by Jason @dhookstead OH NO THEY HAVE SIGNSorson welles doesn't appear for much of the third man but his dialogue on the ferris wheel is unforgettable
Retweeted by JasonHey @jason1749 your ride’s here.
Retweeted by Jason
@HitlerPuncher @neokefka_99 @highway_62 was it yesterday? five months ago? three weeks from now? nobody knows @THE_Stefano_DLC bitch you’re stuck with me @neokefka_99 @highway_62 there is no guarantee any of us will live to see Halloween this yearQuarantine status:
Retweeted by Jason @ChrisCrash00 I believe he is a cursed creature that can only be freed by the Mets becoming a functional organization. @neokefka_99 little early for Christmas movies @depechejoe you’re this guy
Retweeted by JasonI’m sorry Liz who
Retweeted by Jasonmayor lightfoot invites us to purchase a protest permit at the nearest city clerk location to whisper breonna taylo…
Retweeted by Jasonthis is a lovely cake and anyone who says it is not is a filthy liar @Learnonaut DEATH ON THE MISSISSIPPI: there's a murder on a steamboat booze cruise and only Benoit Blanc can solve… it another entry in "The Benoit Blanc Mysteries" and start it and any subsequent sequels off with an NBC Myste…
Retweeted by Jason @FrostyJane I see your winter project to use my immense brain to smash the suicide/homicide binary, which is real
Retweeted by Jason @THE_Stefano_DLC I’d love if they all got “fun” code names for the sequel. @HitlerPuncher @unicornosis @david_wolkin Sold out but I can get you a Clyde Bruckman.i have a million issues with this i've already discussed at length elsewhere. but i'm also realizing that maybe i d…
Retweeted by Jasonworms are thoroughly documenting all the minor property damage committed by people that are getting the shit beat o…
Retweeted by Jason @colonelnemo maybe they're not final? These look real bad for Macfarlane @colonelnemo Macfarlane @neokefka_99 what @PraxJarvin just an exec screaming at the sculptor "THE HAIR NEEDS TO BE FLOPPIER, FLOPPIER DAMN YOU!" @pablohidalgo I think Marvel is for D+, Hulu is just...Hulu.Even if you don't like rioting, RIOTING GETS RESULTS Seriously, it's probably one of the most effective ways to ge…
Retweeted by Jasoncan't wait for my white bautista action figure wilma, yes't believe they're using CGI Peter Boyle for Baron Harkkonen @ThatWeissGuy I need to invest in some warmer clothes as I switch from summer loungewear to winter/fall stuff. @ThatWeissGuy ready for autumn!Muppets should star in every movie.
Retweeted by Jasonsohla got her own show before ba relaunched the test kitchen lmao
Retweeted by JasonMy parents arrived in Seoul a week ago. Immediately, they took a COVID test. Got PPE from the government. Had to do…
Retweeted by JasonBreonna Taylor’s killers getting off scot free without even a trial is exactly the systemic rot that people are pro…
Retweeted by Jason @THE_Stefano_DLC like the presidency! if he's doing it right we don't hear about him for weeks at a timeRioting isn't a strategy. It's not deliberated. It's a thing that happens. It's a natural and entirely predictable…
Retweeted by Jason
Retweeted by JasonThis picture is from 65 years ago today. Emmett Till's killers acquitted after a jury deliberated for a little mor…
Retweeted by JasonI love that stupidity in this case is not liking the work that he, Doctor Frankenstein, does with corpses
Retweeted by JasonI always forget how hard BLUE THUNDER goes in its climax. @highway_62 I watched that yesterday. Made a great hobo double feature with THE EMPEROR OF THE NORTH POLE. @Bustronaut It actually made them tons of money, it just tanked in China.honestly shocked BLACK WIDOW isn't going to D+ NOT CITIZEN THE CONTENT WILL STILL FLOW, REPORT TO YOUR LOCAL CONTENT CENTER TO OBTAIN CONTENT PELLETS @darthastuart @HitlerPuncher DC is basically doing this right now, with their YA line of OGN's and Black Label for… faux ham, not real pigs
Retweeted by Jasonthis looks really good @HitlerPuncher @TheOtherJeff Jeff, it's her birthday so you are contractually obligated to be interested. @CeciliaTweets hey! happy birthday @TheOtherJeff oh noJapanese poster for Fire Walk with Me (1992)
Retweeted by Jasonif the Peacemaker TV series gives us John Cena assassinating a president, I’m in
Retweeted by Jason @ThatWeissGuy we'll definitely get a collection of the 80's series and maybe Checkmate! as wellI assumed Cena was in the movie as a glorified cameo to get amusingly killed, but this is a whole new level.hey, 13-year old Jason, here's a present @neokefka_99 personally applied for 3 positions within Wells Fargo that I was very qualified for, and got 3 denials. My name i…
Retweeted by JasonFauci: “This happens with Senator Rand all the time.”
Retweeted by Jasonincredible record for Chargers HR
Retweeted by Jason @Farts_Johnson Justified is so good at repurposing comedians for characters. @highway_62 @ThatWeissGuy If GM had people killing themselves with their "autopilot" or if their cars burst into fl… @highway_62 @ThatWeissGuy No, their tech is, if anything, lesser than what GM and others have created, Tesla is jus… Therapist: “Ska Ernest Borgnine can’t hurt you.” Ska Ernest Borgnine:
Retweeted by Jason @uzionmain the key to being a galaxy-brained economist is believing that money is not a real-world thingsomeone should point out there's a corollary to this, Elon Musk lied in yourself
Retweeted by Jason @TheJewishDream "The President is too stupid to be racist." wow, congratsOld People Funkos.
Retweeted by JasonMen really think it’s okay to live like this
Retweeted by JasonI agree with this — Sunny is the only contemporary TV show that truly understands the American berserk
Retweeted by Jason
Retweeted by Jason“Men really think it's okay to live like this” *posts pic of spacious & tidy apartment sans furniture overlooking a city or nature*
Retweeted by Jason @ThatWeissGuy Oh dang! Thanks! @THE_Stefano_DLC It's clean, it's clutter free, it's better than our living room. @THE_Stefano_DLC I mean, I'd probably flop a mattress on the floor with pillows to prop me up, that camp chair is o… note, this did not reduce our desie to adopt a boy tuxedo and name him "Bart Fargo"Don’t call us trendsetters but since we got Judy last summer everyone is getting grey cats. guarantee it's because their computer system won't allow them to waive it so they're trying to pressure us to just pay it.enjoying fighting with the high school over a fee for a book my son is not using because he is remote learningHe's spending it all on the Counter-Earth he and other billionaires are building on the far side of the sun.
Retweeted by Jason @ThatWeissGuy @FlexFantastic Schools haven't been open a month, there's not near enough data for any conclusions. A @uzionmain Just did mine for today and lost my first battle. Fucking Drageaux @PnxNotDed Sonny Crockett was basically a grown-up James Spader from those movies. @uzionmain Yeah, I just started that and it's kicking my ass, but it's real good.SPD: Our response times will be much longer because of this 5% budget cut. We simply cannot accommodate because we…
Retweeted by Jason @jamesdleech gimme a Hoagie Man variant or nothing @jamesdleech did he ax himself in the head?Let the record show that I NEVER forgot "I Will Build A Machine"
Retweeted by Jason @froonding_loom stolen from Steve Jobs, no originality in Hollywood @THE_Stefano_DLC @DieRobinsonDie @depechejoe Kathleen Kennedy and JJ Abrams in the sound booth screaming "PLAY THE HITS BITCH"