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Jonathan Pie is a news reporter https://t.co/HbqvEvuIfG… WEBSITE: https://t.co/DhyS7Tv9mf Enquiries to info@JonathanPie.com

2,031 Following   280,953 Followers   15,437 Tweets

Joined Twitter 10/13/15


@JonathanPieNews If you're on the fence about going, take it from someone who's been to the theatre to have Pie all… https://t.co/6UVb9AQXuN
Retweeted by Jonathan PieAbsolutely horrifying. To make this even more sinister, the army has described media reports as "fake news". Now, w… https://t.co/ra5Z3IEGIzThis speech demonstrates that it‘s entirely possible to be completely anti-racist, whilst also seeing Critical Race… https://t.co/2otznVdhnkRanting on Twitter is nowhere near as pleasurable as shouting obscenities at you all in a theatre. The terrible aco… https://t.co/Q3skT1hyiO
10/21
2020
Not at all. I dont think there's anything childish about pointing out the fact that, whatever your opinion or polit… https://t.co/R7RZCCXiG8Another great organistaion helping the homeless. #ToLondonWithLove Christmas Homeless Drive. Help raise £1000 to… https://t.co/WZoEMQvShv
Retweeted by Jonathan PieAnother great organistaion helping the homeless. #ToLondonWithLove Christmas Homeless Drive. Help raise £1000 to… https://t.co/WZoEMQvShvThere was a Steve Bell cartoon back when Heseltine was closing the pits in the early 90s. It was him and the cabine… https://t.co/wHJUl22k5t
Retweeted by Jonathan Pie“Slipped” implies that it was an accident. https://t.co/pHChZTvvEq
Retweeted by Jonathan PieWith all this Covid "which teir means what?" confusion, I have one simple question: How do I (legally) watch The West Wing reunion?Very strong performance from @AndyBurnhamGM I hope Boris is armed with a cheeky grin, shit hair and an amusing us… https://t.co/YNY17XXU9NThey really don’t give a shit do they? https://t.co/VcovtwscYK
10/20
2020
Ann Widdecombe says that ’families don’t want to see same-sex couples’ on Strictly Come Dancing. But honestly, did… https://t.co/oYAvgY3ZuXLiterally zero wrong with what Elunded posted here. Although personally I've always more had the hots for Albert Sp… https://t.co/7mOu3nsVvB
Retweeted by Jonathan PieWait, it’s a ’fire break’ now? What next? A ‘virus blocker’? A ‘spread preventer’? A ‘definitely not a lockdown but… https://t.co/U27VHccuH1
10/19
2020
Whereas you make Nixon look like a decent, law-abiding and likeable President. https://t.co/U7ZSjD64jsCharlie Hebdo satirises politics and all religions. After recent events, the fact that so many people seem to be mo… https://t.co/SIoeaGLFGI4 years ago I was doing trollies at Sainsburys on a Monday night. I left, worked hard and got a degree from the Uni… https://t.co/yShuZbzq7I
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10/18
2020
Ian Lavery, an ex miner and straight talker here in 2017 - this is how you get a politician like Boris Johnson on t… https://t.co/AI4ZZo23ES
Retweeted by Jonathan PieI know in the great scheme of things she looks after the equivalent a large town, but great to see competent and co… https://t.co/9kkxDFPiVj
10/17
2020
Orange man ANGRY! https://t.co/XpK72RJzHsYour occasional reminder that an “Australia-style deal” is also a “Sierra Leone-style deal”, a “Guam-style deal” or… https://t.co/Vvb6xgM3Fc
Retweeted by Jonathan PieWhenever Boris puts on his ‘Hey kids! Everything’s cool!’ children’s TV host persona, you know that he knows we’re… https://t.co/htATGtWtKJIt’s not about what we want for ourselves, @DominicRaab. It’s about what we want for low-paid and self-employed peo… https://t.co/mGkG4ccfFB
Retweeted by Jonathan PieOven. Ready. Brexit. https://t.co/IVYOYz5u8Z
10/16
2020
Me and @mrjamesob have our disagreements on occasion. But this is seriously excellent viewing: https://t.co/xHiOOpZ90b"This lad will eat anything; Lego, birds, hair... You name it" https://t.co/tQOOYat1bt
Retweeted by Jonathan PiePossibly the best one yet. https://t.co/VTV9djL59xAbsolutely this. Hats off to @JonathanPieNews for this. 👇 https://t.co/dtN6J5wzSQ
Retweeted by Jonathan PieWhereas voting for you lot has gone swimmingly so far... https://t.co/JL6PtZ2ENBThe Second Wave: We’re all fucked. Full video here: https://t.co/kH2UqKdjdu https://t.co/iGwkTUtRzM
Retweeted by Jonathan PieThe great @JonathanPieNews epically blows another gasket. https://t.co/mO0VW3Hj7K
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10/15
2020
Fucking hell, Fatima didn’t waste any time. https://t.co/93q9aARAmHhttps://t.co/tZWKP3J5v4This is just superb. Mines a pint! https://t.co/rqaUe2SkhfI'm Anti-Tory, Anti-Trump, Anti-injustice. With an occasional pop at my own (left) side. Just coz I'm also pro fr… https://t.co/UxowL5A3AZThe Second Wave: We’re all fucked. Full video here: https://t.co/kH2UqKdjdu https://t.co/iGwkTUtRzMThe Prime Monster essentially just said that once furlough is over people have Universal Credit to fall back on. What a cunt.“Sure, I could live on £5.84 an hour... I mean, a loaf of bread is what? Ten pence these days? Piece of piss.” https://t.co/A5N77x9PavDuring the announcement of the governments new plan, they also announced that the plan wouldn’t work. We’re throug… https://t.co/cYA8734Mcu
Retweeted by Jonathan PieAustralia’s Great Barrier Reef 'has lost half its corals since 1995’ https://t.co/xsl1LxNoL9
Retweeted by Jonathan PieDuring the announcement of the governments new plan, they also announced that the plan wouldn’t work. We’re throug… https://t.co/cYA8734McuJust saw Fatima selling meth in Lidl car park.Due to Covid uncertainty we have made the decision to reschedule the tour once again to next year. We have managed… https://t.co/5qi5xAvHDS
Retweeted by Jonathan Pie1) We locked down too late in March. 2) We lifted lockdown too fast in the summer. 3) We're delaying lockdown too l… https://t.co/GcYpHnc701
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10/14
2020
Exactly. This Government has SO much to answer for. But to announce new measures and admit that they won't work at… https://t.co/YkFdFLZc4r
Retweeted by Jonathan PieThe government is officially no longer being guided by the science. https://t.co/zvtULKU9bW
Retweeted by Jonathan PieNail. Head. https://t.co/7HwD9hmPjE
Retweeted by Jonathan PieMe too, Kath. Me too. https://t.co/peU8b7XlsWThe government is officially no longer being guided by the science. https://t.co/zvtULKU9bWThe Second Wave https://t.co/r4IYh4nuXX
Retweeted by Jonathan PieThis sums it up. This sums it all up. I recomend a watch of this. Was cathartic for me anyway. "The plane is go… https://t.co/3ddfpIhqUa
Retweeted by Jonathan PieThe Second Wave https://t.co/r4IYh4nuXXYes. https://t.co/yZK3c2ThJsHow it started: How it’s going: https://t.co/bcq4S1pNsj
10/13
2020
To be fair, Fatima is pretty shit at dancing.https://t.co/xZ9Zdk17yn
Retweeted by Jonathan Piehttps://t.co/xZ9Zdk17yn“One small jab for man... one giant wallop for mankind...” https://t.co/tGN9elDjaE
10/12
2020
London isn’t a country, and Sadiq Khan isn’t the PM. Hope this clears things up for you Shaun. https://t.co/aXTmXZGgtHNothing is certain right now except for this: I cannot WAIT to get back on a stage and swear my tits off. Mask perm… https://t.co/HK9plaHu0Q
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10/10
2020
...and what about the self-employed... are they still getting shafted up the arse this winter? https://t.co/IA06jEyZS6
10/9
2020
Nothing is certain right now except for this: I cannot WAIT to get back on a stage and swear my tits off. Mask perm… https://t.co/HK9plaHu0Q
10/8
2020
“We’ve argued and blamed everyone but at the end of the day we’re all in this together and I can’t stop swearing to… https://t.co/mn4bFEjRY6
Retweeted by Jonathan PieKeir Starmer: “Prime Minister, if you actually listened to the question, we might get on better.” #PMQs MPs: https://t.co/6gJNh4CTzV
10/7
2020
What a coincidence, I’ve thought for years now that the majority of politicians should retrain as circus performers. https://t.co/gzvzqUmSVV
10/6
2020
“Hey guys, go out there and get Covid! You’ll never feel better!” Jesus. Fucking. Christ. https://t.co/35kuTGVXhP“GO TO THE FUCKING CINEMA YOU LAZY NETFLIX SHITS.” https://t.co/n63ptsB9cUBrilliant. https://t.co/ccATLcF0VeI’m sorry but what the fuck even *is* Dido Harding and how does she have a job? (Rhetorical question of course, we… https://t.co/4smn8jtV4pThe public health consequences of this raise so many questions How many contacts of these *missing* 16,000 have be… https://t.co/PaoG5EUzGm
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10/5
2020
Dear Katie, Thanks for the advice, I will gladly slam the door in your face. Kind Regards Jonathan Pie https://t.co/GboUDoakJh
10/3
2020
Nobody punches the fucking Keymaster and gets away with it. https://t.co/DZOud55xqLYou lose all sense of taste with Covid so how long has he had it https://t.co/3h5I5drCjz
Retweeted by Jonathan PieIs it just me, or does it look like Boris is standing next to a really shit wax model of himself in this photograph… https://t.co/xNK3SHImfNDonald Trump mocks Hillary Clinton over her pneumonia outbreak https://t.co/feHjV6cLDa
Retweeted by Jonathan PieHydroxychloroquine and Flash Lemon Zest floor cleaner at the ready Mr President. If you could just roll up your sle… https://t.co/6SjvleSBrJ
10/2
2020
MPs unable to follow the rules implemented on the rest of us has become a pandemic in itself. https://t.co/QiZzl5dZv0I can confirm that my father Stanley Johnson has now been fined for not wearing a mask. I phoned him personally and… https://t.co/AGdVfxreYM
Retweeted by Jonathan Pie“Eat out to help out!” ”YOU’RE TOO FAT, LOSE SOME WEIGHT.” ”Go back to work, let’s get the ecomony moving again!” ”… https://t.co/HhNUamu0U5Try shutting the fuck up man https://t.co/S1VHLCy54u
10/1
2020
Accurate. https://t.co/PKHaZZO4BHIs it really that difficult to condemn white supremacists? Because I have to be honest here, I’d find it a piece of piss.I want this. I want someone to shake my hand the way Trump Shakes Melania’s ❤️ https://t.co/Sm4hM6CjcF
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9/30
2020
What's going on? https://t.co/2eZliWYSYh“I misspoke today” is an odd way of saying: “I do not have a fucking clue”. https://t.co/WMQtMG8Y6r
9/29
2020
“Yeah, I know. And I'm thinking about it in my block, that you may knock off.” https://t.co/KhEtZgI7oJ
Retweeted by Jonathan PieI think @Channel4News might have just sunk his presidency. Who's have thunk it. https://t.co/DERPRwulWo🤣 @fredperry. May I introduce your new marketing director https://t.co/qr7HvMcjLY
Retweeted by Jonathan PieFuck me. All these U-turns. I haven’t felt this dizzy since I mistook a bottle of car screenwash for Créme de menth… https://t.co/Zmd9izxqilFred Perry could have easily solved this issue by getting RuPaul to model for it in full drag during their next ad… https://t.co/acijEOWib1The BBC isn’t perfect but it’s one of the most successful British inventions ever, enhancing our profile round the… https://t.co/kbIYjY9ORt
Retweeted by Jonathan Pie#kayburley At what point would you report your neighbour for not following the rules? Helen Whately “If they had… https://t.co/pJCQm1bg6W
Retweeted by Jonathan Pie @MoveOnNotice How dare you!FAKE BILLIONAIRE! https://t.co/u6fexVjhyJ
9/28
2020
You need to remove the ‘NHS’ bit from your app title. It goes against the Trade Descriptions Act. https://t.co/eHBk5SW2MCAMAZING! https://t.co/eHBk5SW2MCToday we hear govt’s “NHS” Covid app only wants to know about Serco/private testing If you had a test in an NHS or… https://t.co/XPuimmNip7
Retweeted by Jonathan PieAn alternative headline would be 6,999,800 of the shows 7 million viewers did not complain https://t.co/CHvbxOOHpi
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9/26
2020
People are panic-buying in case other people start panic-buying. This fucking country.
9/25
2020

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