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Writer for hire. Formerly of MTV, Vanity Fair, and Vice. Streetwise to the lies and the jive talk. Email: kaleb.c.horton@gmail.com. Podcast: @LastExitShow

1,533 Following   19,426 Followers   20,378 Tweets

Joined Twitter 3/7/11


Toluca Lake, California. https://t.co/3ZWx9tC0Ch
9/23
2018
Commerce, California. https://t.co/72BLFuPgpHTemple City, California. https://t.co/80hWBiFafmBurbank at Night, No. 2. https://t.co/RTB5UYb1MvBurbank at Night, No. 1. https://t.co/no6BDA731l
9/18
2018
Pioneer Chicken. https://t.co/Vy5WpmqYKf
9/17
2018
Breaking my social media hiatus to prove I somehow saw Jerry Lee Lewis in the year of our Lord 2018. It was cool. https://t.co/7w820MfJ2n
9/1
2018
Route 66. https://t.co/UVq32zhhAY
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThink I'm gonna follow @marieberd's lead and log off for awhile instead of making myself feel bad all the time for no reason.Me, turning up at someone's house but insisting on turning off all of the lights, pushing their fridge sideways and… https://t.co/6POwRRWGbn
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonWould argue that Myers-Briggs is a totally successful personality test. Granted, the personality test just divides… https://t.co/y9V8wRspJL
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonOh no not Spotify I need that half a cent https://t.co/UoMfDvZdv9
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonA fun thing about being on wellbutrin is going through my music collection and realizing for the first time that an… https://t.co/VoPgbP0BEzTwitter, n. ~ an MMORPG that nobody likes but every writer thinks they have to play where white supremacists have infinite respawns.
8/21
2018
oh, great, now the Eagles are going to become insufferable egomaniacs https://t.co/VAtpDDcPgX
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @Bro_Pair The episode where Chris Elliott discovers white blues is breathtaking.This show is still my favorite comedy thing of 2018, and last night's possible heel turn by Pat, "this is a little… https://t.co/52alm6SSEl @1800PATBYRNE "I don't forgive you" was unbelievably funny.we're approaching a singularity here https://t.co/GdfwbBT1p5
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton| ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄ ̄| I ❤️ COUNTRY MUSIC |___________| (\__/) || (… https://t.co/X1sKfNqTup
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton"Doctors have long warned of the link between indolence and atrophy." https://t.co/kQFQ8ZbRrLSomebody pay me to write about this. I was born to do it. https://t.co/OPc7XYlbgcI have no idea how the algorithm works. https://t.co/ZlsgfGKaLB
Retweeted by Kaleb Hortonhttps://t.co/pSn2o4ZKIh
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton.@sarahjeong’s feed has become an incredibly simple form of trolling.
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonI just joined a fun. tribute band and we are called fun. There is no period at the end of our band name, it’s just… https://t.co/NZzIKjCENW
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @snipy Christ, that’s all the good ones. That’s amazing.I don’t normally retweet blue stuff, but this is too damn good: https://t.co/XGlyZsY5QcTHE FUGITIVE (1993) Goofs: No one at a St Patrick’s Day parade would discard a green novelty bowler hat without first filling it with vomit
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @kalebhorton idk about impossible but the strangest was definitely the surprise appearance of Val Kilmer as Mark Tw… https://t.co/3F7DqBHhmH
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8/20
2018
@bobbker Wow. @kalebhorton Miles Davis, definitely. At the Wembley Conference Centre in 1986.
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonAnd as always, go see Wanda Jackson while you still can.Oh, and in retrospect, it’s insane that I got to see the original lineup of the Pogues in 2010. The odds of all tho… https://t.co/3qzYHi9yrv @kalebhorton X, Jerry Lee Lewis, Firehose, The Knitters in 1987. https://t.co/nvUDgCFWOh
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @kalebhorton Otherwise, the answer will always be the same: Link Wray
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @highway_62 @kalebhorton Worth mentioning that Joe Strummer was playing in the Pogues at that show. Also it was Los… https://t.co/uH3Nes3XGT
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @kalebhorton Terrastock 1, but maybe not in the way that you intended. Beat Farmers opening for the Blasters. The… https://t.co/APkEXndOM4
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonNothing like a cool glass of water on a warm day! https://t.co/qXHIpsdVVV
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @ryantologist When he started doing Grinder Man Blues, I was stunned. He was keeping this old and precious thing in… https://t.co/ractH7yliuWhat are some impossible shows you’ve seen? Mine was Pinetop Perkins, Willie “Big Eyes” Smith and Hubert Sumlin all… https://t.co/Jprpu8pqf2It is *appalling* that we wouldn’t let Ibrahim Ferrer into America to collect a Grammy at the end of his life. https://t.co/jTHAaXqDbzwildest shit on twitter is two people in a loop of calling each other a bot, each a sentient person convinced the o… https://t.co/iuMlRmM573
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThe best way to do a cruel Neutral Milk Hotel impression is to do a good B-52s impression.
8/19
2018
Again, can't help but think of the selflessness of the people holding the cameras, often in bizarre locations, to f… https://t.co/HQ4UIZV7dt
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonIt's like someone performed a spell to personify the phrase "banned from town hall meetings for life" https://t.co/8laOHAv9hJ
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonSo many of them take place in what could be like the single setting from a twilight zone episode. They have to prov… https://t.co/1rL2qjAydb
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton"impossible to tell if trolling" is a silly trope most of the time but I genuinely have no idea with these. It's a… https://t.co/xfG4oavGVY
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThe tragedy is that I never saved them and most have been deleted from Youtube. I'm looking at the listicle of the… https://t.co/npx0BT3237
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonWhen the first Atlas Shrugged film came out they asked for fans to say "I am john galt" to add to a dvd extra. The… https://t.co/139ATOaJtc
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThe verdict is in: my luxury word art is all the rage and supply just can’t keep up with demand, so each, uh, art w… https://t.co/MuGitysgVRBusiness Plan: I’m gonna start an inspirational word art company with stupid Disney calligraphy, but all the quotes… https://t.co/iAmMADRA5y"Christmas movies would be so much better with murders in them" - my mom accidentally inventing Shane Black movies
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @virgiltexas @uhshanti I also want in
8/18
2018
@Chownoir @marieberd I think it's just posting damage, honestly.Never forget the best Taco Bell dish https://t.co/BZJDcka6b6
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @marieberd big fan of the Mitski/Tommy Lee Jones crossover content, you should make that the new brand @jack_hamilton That would be the first worthwhile thing the company has ever done.Imagine an Elon Musk/Jack White presidential campaign in 2020. Then imagine Dan Harmon as Secretary of Defense. Now… https://t.co/ka1koFUffDI don't know how yet, but this is definitely the precise moment where America will end. https://t.co/r54PCjTPNmIt's definitely the singularity of being wrong. Somewhere, Dan McLaughlin's jaw has unhinged and a beam of pure ene… https://t.co/iaqQNVTtl4 @quartzcity That's it, I'm watching this now. @PAPPADEMAS wonder why they don't play music videos anymore @kalebhorton it's actually exciting what a dumb take that is - it's like he's discovered a new element or something
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThis confirms my theory that not only are Republicans incapable of achieving transcendence through music, but none… https://t.co/ZuhyxdWgegI'm gonna go ahead and perpetrate some hubris by saying that New York Times interview pretty much confirms all of my guesses!This is infuriating, not so much because Quincy Jones is a genius, but because it's the sort of illiterate and vagu… https://t.co/OrPWUPevUsWhoah: the earliest known footage of Elvis Costello has surfaced. He's playing with his pub rock band Flip City, wh… https://t.co/G7d0054XUN
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8/17
2018
trash collectors keep track of how many pizza boxes you leave out every week. there’s a shared google doc they all update
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @Boringstein In-between historical tech is extremely my shit. It's the only way you could get me to write about tec… https://t.co/n7mYHfp85R @Boringstein Well, the slightly pre-mp3 era is full of weird bad stuff like that. It's a technological transition p… https://t.co/iCGaGXiuT2 @Boringstein All-Star by Smash Mouth because of the Hit Clips thing that had it, which my brothers played several t… https://t.co/N00cbrW96pExaltation: https://t.co/q5HNMEr5hTAnd God help you if you don't have the Amazing Grace live album: https://t.co/9dfq1NEW81Aretha Franklin was one of the best gospel singers to ever live. Listen to her sing Precious Lord: https://t.co/7h1W2A2upYA full concert Aretha Franklin gave at the Fillmore West in March 1971. #RIPArethaFranklin https://t.co/uI8sv7sNZc
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8/16
2018
@aklingus Me too. It's sad to see people drop dead five minutes after they quit working, and it happens so often. R… https://t.co/5yhlrr0YRR @BillCorbett The Conversation is probably my favorite Serious Grown Up Movie that has no comedic appeal.It's a real trip to see a contemporary photo of Gene Hackman. Before this, I hadn't seen a trace of him in fourteen… https://t.co/ItmJiA7dmmI met a guy who brought Sun Ra to LA to play a concert. Ra stayed for a week and each day would dress up in his ful… https://t.co/Mhg0h38bHb
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @NoChorus I’m a fan of all three of those guys, all of whom reside in the “more replies” universe. @mattdpearce @RheaButcher I have to see John Cusack look tired in this. I have to.Movie Trivia: Ron Howard directed a Star Wars film about Han Solo called simply “SOLO.” It was the last movie to be… https://t.co/t6ILyZA9vj
8/15
2018
I am Thankful for the kindly ladies who leave pies upon their windowsills so an old chunk of coal like me might have a bite now and then.
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonI can't get over how good the new Amanda Shires album is, and I particularly can't get over how moody and nervous a… https://t.co/VKGR50GSGf @renan Regardless of how I would have done, I am a much happier person now that I don't write politics. Sometimes I… https://t.co/6ytL6ZxD4PReminder: Other people are NOT your responsibility It is OKAY if others get angry If your actions cause other pe… https://t.co/iFeDCaSqhb
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @nandorvila You’re welcome to carpool. @CharlotteBeyond I KNOWJust bought tickets to see Jerry Lee Lewis in the year of our Lord two thousand and eighteen. I don’t understand ho… https://t.co/mOPTBeDwcePlease read @MarkRichardson’s gorgeous sign-off for Pitchfork, a meditation about silence. It’s transcendent.… https://t.co/bRobJERkAX.@MarkRichardson closes out his Resonant Frequency column with an extraordinary piece about listening to silence. https://t.co/8eDvrw7Ryw
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8/14
2018
Emotional Chris Hardwick is attacked and brutalized by Robocop while crying on TV (VIDEO)
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonInspiring story about how anyone can rebuild their life, as long as they have support of friends (the hearst copora… https://t.co/zccngsWMmt
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonThe Swampers, man. They were brilliant together. https://t.co/2mR3b1NJarcomputer, show me journalism collapsing in on itself like a dying star https://t.co/SnXbZFEwux
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonAretha Franklin photographed by Art Kane for Esquire Magazine, 1967 https://t.co/FYrqVwTQBU
Retweeted by Kaleb HortonMy favorite Aretha Franklin song: I Never Loved A Man (The Way I Love You), with the Muscle Shoals Rhythm Section. https://t.co/sYdoJiyqfKSir, SIR- have you no, SIR, have you no DIGnity, Sir https://t.co/6MwotBKLRI
Retweeted by Kaleb Horton @NoChorus Congrats on being a numbers lord tbh
8/13
2018

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