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I go to seminary and I eat guacamole. she/her/hers

248 Following   410 Followers   44,430 Tweets

Joined Twitter 8/21/10


@kboris_mccarthy I miss u 2 soon pls
4/18
2021
I love brushing my teeth sm.Hi everyone @katetoporski But what if I got J&J 🥺
4/17
2021
Important news: falafel :) @bickynates “Oops”- GodPeople keep asking me if I regret getting the J&J vaccine last week? Oh, you mean the ✨limited edition✨?? Noooo
Retweeted by Katie ButlerThere is. CONSTANTLY liturgy going through my head does that happen to anyone else
4/16
2021
@willtrumans My fav off fearless tbh @BrendanW73 Big gretch said fuck around and find outWe’re learning vocal warmups and how to read sheet music. I uh… don’t need to be here lolEvery Tuesday I log onto my night class and absolutely lose my mind
4/14
2021
The same people that said we were overreacting to a virus with a 2% death rate are about to lose their minds over a… https://t.co/RMe7QI1TUK
Retweeted by Katie ButlerIt’s happened to me A LOT lately where I see an ad on Facebook for a really cute outfit and when I click on it to b… https://t.co/Mm3z1RGQqa
4/13
2021
@KVVanney Seeing “Pastor Katie” written out just made me so happy I’ve never seen it before and that’s gonna be me… https://t.co/i8NBO9h2uqJust spend 25 minutes looking for my iPad so I could workout. Rex had been laying on it the entire time.Love it when stepmark, king of sweatpants, shares his opinions on my outfit.Frizzy hair szn is here
4/12
2021
That’s the best way to describe it. Like when you get butterflies in your stomach but in my legs.Lately my legs have been feeling so nervous @CJtheRed75 I’d consult a doctor about thatThere is no feeling quite like that of preaching a sermon that you feel IN YOUR BONES. even if it’s just to a camera. @bickynates No Luke doesn’t speak he just screams bloody murder @Awkwardly_Soft Lest we forget this gem in our history: https://t.co/ruLDM6XKsQI mean the fact that we have a dateline episode and an unsolved mysteries episode for two different murders should tell you something 🤷🏼‍♀️Lol they just said “nothing bad EVER happens in Grosse Pointe” on Dateline. Ask any of us we’ll tell you how wrong you are lmao
4/10
2021
The three-year-old next door met Henry today and he said to me “Henry is my friend now. Can you text my mom so we c… https://t.co/ZGQ0Ad4EU3St. Paul in most of his letters https://t.co/Y3WfFpRu9m
Retweeted by Katie ButlerMy mom just informed me that when I have to move out of Chicago in a year, she wants me to leave all my furniture t… https://t.co/JJPpES0U0V @annedubya At the Michigan youth gathering when I was 16 I puked into a fake potted plant. Look at us now!!Omg just because you have a coupon code does NOT mean you are required to buy it Katie @beeefrank @hmbrown1994 @snark_tank RIGHT she’s built her entire brand off of trying to be relatable. @hmbrown1994 @snark_tank And like… terrifying??? The look in her eyes and the tone of her voice is literally scary tbh.i am empathetic to the pain and insecurities khloé kardashian admits she faces, but i think what is important to no… https://t.co/LnesI2HNpj
Retweeted by Katie Butler @snark_tank @hmbrown1994 here’s the video! @hmbrown1994 She then completely missed the point while apologizing the first time. Then she apologized again (kind… https://t.co/JikmbxZGfl @hmbrown1994 She posted a reeeal toxic video saying she’s rich because she works harder than everyone else and comp… https://t.co/M6YvK0EHqU
4/9
2021
@QuietSong13 That’s pretty much exactly what happened. I was up from 1:30-5 feeling like total crap. I’m so disappo… https://t.co/a5IxZHgENpOk I actually could not have slept worse lolMy mom just gave me NyQuil, Benadryl, AND Tylenol PM. This may be the last you hear from me. It has been an honor.
4/8
2021
Loving the warmer weather, but I’m sure gonna miss my turtlenecks @kboris_mccarthy @nickelm10 It’s gonna be 73 maybe I’ll wear my swimming suit
4/7
2021
I hadn’t even thought about this https://t.co/PHOaRGkuHLI’m gonna give the person that vaccinates me tomorrow an open mouth kissOkay this sermon was actually very well received I got multiple emails from parishioners about it thank you, Jesus. https://t.co/pRFLiAmdxMI am so enjoying bearing witness to the downfall of Rachel Hollis. Sorry if that’s not very Christ-like of me. @_emiicakes Lol they have another person to interview for the position today so we’ll see!!
4/6
2021
Today my mom interviewed a man to be a lawyer at her firm and he zoomed in for the interview from the zooMe writing Op-eds https://t.co/l9xRYBTEfrBig into pants lately, which is weird.I got a vaccination appointment!!! https://t.co/QGBybfEJ16
4/5
2021
I’m not convinced I’ll make it through five more weeks of class 😭 this semester is too much 😭😭😭Can’t relate I was with Kristin nearly everyday this week lmao https://t.co/YN8zaBhvHGI panic when someone tells me to dress casually. What does that even mean.My chocolate bunny from last Easter still sits unopened on my dresser.I like peeps 🤷🏼‍♀️Happy Easter the first people to ever preach the gospel were women enjoy your day!!
4/4
2021
@elspethmuzzin Can confirmSo sleepy
4/2
2021
Go ahead and talk your crap, but the breakfast-themed play area? Superior. https://t.co/gd9KA8QBWQI really wanna do a standing back tuck but idk howKinda wild that deviled eggs are so common on Easter.
4/1
2021
No human institution decides who is human, who is visible, who is valued. Human sexuality and gender identity are a… https://t.co/phCS3neLLl
Retweeted by Katie Butler @hmbrown1994 I’m doing a chaplaincy at the u of m hospital this summer!! At least I hope that’s what I’m doing I’m… https://t.co/lWai9mLmgqI officially have an email that ends in “@med.umich.edu” if that’s not the most ridiculous thing you’ve heard today 😂😂😂
3/31
2021
Kitchen sponges really freak me out.
3/30
2021
@alisonnn17 Don’t be shy cmon tell us who it was!!!!!Good Friday sermon update: the word “good” no longer means anything at all.My son just suggested a foundation to bring young tortoises to important events so that 150 years later people can… https://t.co/ozCVuyujQ9
Retweeted by Katie ButlerMy mom is very convinced I have a stomach ulcer I don’t even know what that is I just wanna go to bed
3/29
2021
I’ve said “I wish Parker were here” or “I miss Parker” at least a dozen times today. @willtrumans I loved it!!Lmao I can hear my mom downstairs trying to give Rex his meds saying “eat it rex, it’s a treat! Yum! Oh my god I’m… https://t.co/SW8kCOtjiF
3/27
2021
@CJtheRed75 Hmm I’ll let ya know. Also you were in my dream last night. I saw you in a restaurant and you ignored me. Kinda rude.Has anyone else lost all their motivation for everythingOk is it just me or is finding a swimsuit that covers your a$$ way too difficultHaven’t received any packages in the mail all week. Feeling so empty.
3/26
2021
MONDAY: haha, shrimp! TODAY: (a far more serious tone) shrimp
Retweeted by Katie ButlerThis sermon is a disaster I’m sorry, Jesus
3/25
2021
Not stepmark mansplaining the cinnamon toast shrimp to me 😩 @CalebJarvis I will literally never forgetHow can I work the cinnamon toast shrimp thing into my Good Friday sermonThe Cinnamon Toast Crunch thing is what got me through class just now.
3/24
2021
Meet the Robinsons is so underrated idc. I’ve never told anyone this, but my tattoo was greatly influenced by this… https://t.co/yF0oPHwaex“Is this allowed? I’m doing it anyway”- me every time I write a worship service.Not to be that person but mass shootings have been happening the whole time, they’re just underreported because the… https://t.co/9cdiW6UPehJust led a five minute meditation in which Henry loudly licked his junk the entire five minutes. Without pause.Black jelly beans https://t.co/JTJh9y4jAK
Retweeted by Katie Butler
3/23
2021
Getting absolutely clobbered with headaches today. I was so wanting to enjoy the sunshine but it hurts to open my eyes 😭Who decided 7:30 am was the perfect time for a whole construction crew to come rip up our deck I just wanna talkOk my godson was born today and that’s really cool so I’m gonna stop complaining thanks for sitting through this growth arc with me.My mom tried to make it up to me by ordering me an ice cream sundae and it never 🙃 came 🙃 why can’t I have joy
3/22
2021
Ordered dinner an hour ago. Starving. Postmates cancels the order because no delivery people are around. You made me sad, postmates. @CJtheRed75 Excellent pointHmmm are you allowed to go to bed when your best friend is in labor with your godson? Like it’s gonna take a while right? I’m sleepy.
3/21
2021
Idk how people consider pedicures to be relaxing. I spend the entire time tending my entire body trying not to kick the person doing it.
3/20
2021
Very tired of my neighbors wind chimes keeping me up all night 😭like is it just me or are wind chimes super rude
3/19
2021
Dear Church: the white supremacy is coming from the pulpit and lives in the pews. It’s not out there. It’s us. Ho… https://t.co/oGlKrDlPwm
Retweeted by Katie Butler
3/18
2021
Guess who gets to spend allllllll day at the eye doctor 🥰
3/17
2021
@CJtheRed75 I wish.
3/16
2021

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