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Laird Barron @LairdBarron Rondout Valley, NY

U.S. writer. Represented by @thejordache and @pouyanyc. Follows/RTs do not = endorsement. Avatar by Yves Tourigny. He/Him/His

4,716 Following   9,176 Followers   10,600 Tweets

Joined Twitter 6/30/10

As far as I'm concerned, Ned got what he had coming for murdering Lady. @Gabino_Iglesias +1. Then edit after the editor edits it. Later, when the fucking thing is in print, you'll see a b… @cawilsonaz *friend* should be family member. And on that count, I have an aunt and that's about it. @cawilsonaz I'm done with any Trump supporter the way I'd be done with a friend, buddy, or colleague who supported Hitler. @dmalmon I loved S2.If you think it should be harder to vote, get in the bin. If you think you should have a say in someone's identity…'s a simple choice to reject family, friends, and associates over politics once you realize that to conservatives…
Thanks, Beau. @googlyeyes1993 We'll really mess with his head if we flip the senate blue. The next two years would be a nightmare for him.Trump with his "especially a female" comment and now this...These dudes shoot themselves in the foot. Then reload a… @misanthropemike For better or worse, I think the cake is baked, as the kids say. I honestly don't think he can say…"Cast some light and you'll be all right...for now."Great, eerie song: @ReviewsRain Good luck, man."I shall have my vengeance against Pennsylvania" is a brilliant closing message for a Presidential campaign.
Retweeted by Laird Barron @NBCNews @NBCNewsTHINK No. @GourmetHorror Is that the one where Mal gets shot at the beginning? Damned fine TV. @GovMikeHuckabee Reported. @gweeps The Last Feast of Harlequin. @Andiiterrapin @Gormogons @BillKristol Loosen your foil hatband and the picture will get clearer. @HamiltoBergeran @AzBobbyl @MrBigPecks @davidfrum He couldn't get that running as an insurgent. No way he comes close running on a record. @BP_Gregory @AlanBaxter on why the WH doesn't mandate masks at rallies: iT's a frEE sOcIetY, JAKe. Probably news to everybody who'… @AlanBaxter Nothing like what you get, but we relocated an enormous wolf spider recently. He struck at the glass an… @AlanBaxter We don't have loads of ornery spiders here. So, unless it's an aggressive breed, we live and let live i…'s played for laughs by some, but Obama saying: If you can't stand up to a reporter for a 60 Minutes interview, h… @Gormogons @BillKristol Keep laughing when four far left judges join her later in 2021. @GrimRee06623503 @ThearJim @ScottPresler @realDonaldTrump @SeanParnellUSA @TheJusticeDept Also, having perused your… @GrimRee06623503 @ThearJim @ScottPresler @realDonaldTrump @SeanParnellUSA @TheJusticeDept Like I said.
@EllenDatlow @Stonekettle *like* @labby_dog_farm @LilyBelle05 @JonLemire You appear to have already been suffering brain death, so Covid risk probably didn't apply. @RubinReport There are plenty dumb takes on SW. But this is special. You're showing so much ass it's almost a burlesque parody. @iGregGreene @DavidVeevers1 Yes, we had a mock election in my first grade class. @DavidVeevers1 The Iran hostage crisis. @ThearJim @ScottPresler @realDonaldTrump @SeanParnellUSA @TheJusticeDept Touché. It's less racist.Even worse, the GOP has intentionally created these conditions. mitigation factors will feature voting in a team of adults to handle this mess. @lindseylouwho Poor lighting and no Kurosawa. @JohnCornyn I wonder if Meadows' announcing this morning that your party has quit on America in regard to C19 will have an "impact."
@jamenta @lakanen What, Obama was chopped liver? Sure, Trump has widened the door to autocracy. Sea levels are ri… @jamenta @lakanen And they're getting it. @DominicWan Scumbags work for him. But it's been widely reported that they cringe when he goes off script. Even mis… @honorgoesfar @SteamVerity @TexasTribune @ProjectedPaul Psychopaths tend to clump. @DavidKlion @ChrisKattan4eva Most people are doing something other than writing a book at any particular time. Thank god.Don't miss our final Spooky Online Story Time with @LairdBarron this Wed (Oct 28th) at 7 PM EST!!! I, for one, am e…
Retweeted by Laird BarronTim gives some of the best, practical writing advice you'll find. @HeroOftheFever Yes--it's even better than the studio edition, I think.A god-tier cover: PR department had a collective stroke. @JDBuffington She did her best to deal with this passive-aggressive flailing windsock grifter sack of shit.
2020 @djai76 @anthonynsmith Also gets slammed around multiple times, jumps chasms, etc. At that point I just wrote it of… @anthonynsmith @djai76 The xeno c-section is an undeniable classic. @anthonynsmith @djai76 Fassbender is great in both. I thought Rapace brought it too. @djai76 @anthonynsmith Just like everybody right now in pick a red state. @PauljGarth @djai76 My take on Covenant can be summed up with: If I were on an alien planet with an unknown ecosyst… @E_Ferg26 @djai76 Heh, that's how I summarize the inanity of the script. "Zig, Charlize! Zig!" And of course, every… @anthonynsmith @djai76 Bad plotting. Smart people doing stupid things to further the narrative. @anthonynsmith @djai76 I wanted to, but it betrayed me. @djai76 But Covenant is even worse. @djai76 No matter how angry he is, it's not enough. @CloudbusterRob @matthewjdowd You're not wrong. @radiumskull @d_a_salas Yes, staying alive.So I've evolved Shotgun Logic in to a new thing, an ongoing poetry journal of sorts that I wanted to share with all…
Retweeted by Laird Barron @RepClayHiggins It's called projection, sir. @TheLincoln I could easily survive, "You're even worse than Shakespeare!" @lakanen @RonsonPage Former Presidents Act. @d_a_salas Also appears that Obama reinstated the lifetime SS protection benefit. @d_a_salas Ten years, which is lifetime for Trump. Void if removed from office, but would that apply to arrest and… @JDBuffington I hope the island is a rusting tanker. @MikeH5856 Uncle Donald Explains Weather. @RonsonPage I hope so. But who's doing the removing? Please say a mob of angry French peasants.This I want to know. @CloudbusterRob @matthewjdowd Some of the white old men get it. Thus the fanatical obsession to fill the courts wit… to Cult45: Biden isn't the only one checking his watch. I suspect he represents a majority of Americans who ar… @RichTate Yep. I'm not on the FREE MELANIA! bandwagon. She's wretched. I hope whatever happens to him happens to her. @highway_62 @JohnCornyn Lol. Great minds."What about all these buuuuuuuuggies?" @drskyskull The jackass conveniently ignores the fact that civilization is at all times on a relatively breakneck p… rescue dog was terrified to go on walks or car rides for the first few weeks. She thought we'd leave her somewh… @JamesMcAlear If it goes the way all signs are pointing, I'll be interested what reality he inhabits on 11/4 @paulGtremblay flung his hand aside because, much as the wiser rats of late, she knows it's time to abandon ship.Trump's expression after the debate was that of man who sat up in bed abruptly and scraped his head on a dangling sword. @mdbell79 @kurtbaumeister +1 @TyDu32899564 Cool story. Bro. @DoolerTooler I don't talk to sock puppets. Come back with a spine. @BrackenMacLeod I think cutting Ill Douche's mic actually helps save him from himself. @nadiabulkin What, leaning left to curve the field goal didn't help?I like presidents who aren't under perpetual audit.Man alive, these big, strong right wingers sure are sensitive.
Damned right she was forceful. When one takes a shot at the k̶i̶n̶g̶ Pussy Grabber, one best not miss. @DeanJonesLib Thank you. @Channel_King Never met a guy who doesn't reflexively turn away to tuck in his shirt."I was tucking in my shirt." You have to hand it to Rudy; he @keysplease1964 @SenJohnThune @BarackObama @realDonaldTrump @SpeakerPelosi Time for you to toddle off to your basket. @matty_som Nope. Some bullies are more than capable of taking a punch.I love it when reviewers talk about my work and read excerpts online. @beaujohnson44 Perfect. @DeanJonesLib That's how it goes every single time. I worked at a high school a few years ago. Parents always went…