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Matt Denner @likeyoubutme Trapped in a Katamari

Technology. Justice. Chocolate ice cream. A lot like you, but even more like me. he/him/his

1,373 Following   597 Followers   2,803 Tweets

Joined Twitter 3/14/11


@areya_there_god You email good, Areya.The Democratic Primary: I had to come back to the same question over-and-over again. Here’s who I think is the best… https://t.co/1gg8IWKgaK
Retweeted by Matt Denner
2/22
2020
I understand the progressive case for including Bloomberg in the debates so much better now. 🤔🍽️
2/20
2020
@KickEnterprises @RitaHartIA ?
2/18
2020
@IvyKnoxville Thanks, Heather! I needed that chocolate last week. ;)
2/17
2020
@josephklem At least it mostly stayed in the toilet and in the floor drain? @Julia_E_Leonard I have to drive 49 miles south of Des Moines to take the train, and park my car in the middle of n… https://t.co/3xvTCRWPf3
2/14
2020
My toilet and drain backed up today. How's your day going? @Julia_E_Leonard Flying is such a nightmare these days. Soon we'll be paying a separate fee for arms and legs. @JesseThorn @Bullseye https://t.co/INZGt6VIL2
2/13
2020
@KnivesOut China's Out: Did You Forget Your Boss Is Coming To Dinner? (He's Going to Get Murdered, Though) @KnivesOut Jive's Out: The Death of Disco @KnivesOut Chives Out: This One's About Baked PotatoesI don't know how AirPods sound to the people wearing them, but they sure sound like garbage when you're on the othe… https://t.co/BC04vMPaBM
2/11
2020
Hey @iowasos, just curious: What would be the cost of a state-run primary in Iowa? What would you estimate the cost… https://t.co/jWCgSbOEBX
2/10
2020
(Jason doesn't think this would be a good tweet for the EFF account. Let's get 100 retweets and prove him wrong.)… https://t.co/9WnZcIF3Yb
Retweeted by Matt Denner @paulebarker I just answer all the spam calls, hit the button to talk to someone, and wait until that person hangs… https://t.co/4DrTfYjALE @paulebarker https://t.co/3uNLCveDHP
2/7
2020
DEMOCRACY
2/6
2020
@CANCEL_SAM Just imagine if they'd said it a third time...
2/5
2020
@The__Casey I mean, I'd be happy to. Politics involve people. People are often selfish, dumb, and arrogant. I still… https://t.co/Enq3tBEhBJ @The__Casey ALL POLITICS IS MORE LIKE VEEP THAN THE WEST WING, CASEY. The West Wing is just porn for democracy.If you think the #IACaucus delays are bad, wait until you hear about what happens in black or brown precincts acros… https://t.co/T9UrBw964Q
Retweeted by Matt DennerThis is a very good time to have already planned a vacation. @Liz_Cheney @DNC Umm.... did you forget the GOP caucus in 2012??? Your team actually gave the WRONG numbers, then h… https://t.co/MulaschpsA @3vanSutton This is not the first time a major election has had delayed results, and by all indications, they're wo… https://t.co/3J6TEsUvoB @3vanSutton An Illinois-first primary would really be a Chicago primary. At least in Iowa, you have to travel and talk to people. @elliotharmon I don't know who was responsible for each of the changes, but the changes were what has delayed the r… https://t.co/d6uJwkpQ6IWhat is frustrating for many local Democratic caucus volunteers is that, by most accounts (not all, but way better… https://t.co/w49SvieCeR
Retweeted by Matt Denner @travismcelroy I'm not saying you're dunking on us, but please don't dunk on us. This is a really shitty morning fo… https://t.co/aIrAwvA6AqSo, @OnPointRadio, imagine you've been making the same cake recipe for decades. Your house guests demand a batch of… https://t.co/t2wWINUfzb
2/4
2020
If you're caucusing tonight, please remember that the people running your caucus are your neighbors and volunteers… https://t.co/rfei2RHBD1Iowans eat a bunch of deep-fried food at the Iowa State Fair for 10 days in August. That's pretty much it. The foo… https://t.co/Cs6W5SZ6fpIt’s caucus day! You know what that means! If John Kerry sees his shadow we have 6 more weeks of primary. #IowaCaucus
Retweeted by Matt Denner
2/3
2020
Okay, I'm actually trying to gather my thoughts here because my first reaction to this is deep, deep anger and frus… https://t.co/Bc8nO0xP7N
Retweeted by Matt DennerIf someone sends an email so terrible it makes me barf on my keyboard, can I invoice their consultants?Happy EOM to those political digital marketers who celebrate. At the pace the ecosystem is deteriorating, we'll be… https://t.co/51xwLQJQzb
Retweeted by Matt DennerFor all you lovers of schadenfreude, tow trucks are grabbing a lot of Escalades and pickups by the Trump rally in D… https://t.co/dNcRy4Pwmk
1/31
2020
@livlylife @randallito I just checked my email and wondered for a moment who DigiMom was. She sounded like a fun lady.8 years ago, I finished a campaign and signed up for COBRA. I was covered, so I continued going to physical therapy… https://t.co/7pEEbT3J3y @3vanSutton @iamharold @priceline @Hotwire I ended up using it less and less because I was traveling with people wh… https://t.co/HO1pt9HwLL @3vanSutton @priceline @Hotwire We are the typewriter repairmen of our day. @3vanSutton @priceline @Hotwire Ugh... does this mean I have to become an Airbnb person now? @3vanSutton @priceline @Hotwire And the countless Google Docs I filled with research? But honestly, I'm probably g… https://t.co/1i2DnNlAOI @3vanSutton @priceline @Hotwire It partially just bums me out because I was really good at finding deals with Price… https://t.co/LcZF7SUO6hI just discovered that @priceline has basically killed off the Name Your Own Price tool, and it's breaking my heart… https://t.co/UkfvGyOzej
1/30
2020
Dark mode is a scam.Cherry Coca-Cola Energy drink doesn't quite taste like cherry Coke, but it tastes exactly like a piece of cherry-cola Bottle Cap candy.
1/28
2020
my first report out of Sundance: the woman next to me just said loudly “Siri, what is middle seat etiquette?” then… https://t.co/o3xgn3G9NQ
Retweeted by Matt DennerI don't know how I made it through so much of my life without hearing "Cherry-Colored Funk" by the Cocteau Twins.
1/27
2020
Why is Aristotle? #notrobinhoodI just heard "Caribbean Queen" for the first time in years and I'm wondering how we all let Billy Ocean get away wi… https://t.co/TDDm6Ruoyo
1/24
2020
@PostCultRev It's a fair point, but the relationship between cost of living is far from 1:1. I know a lot more peop… https://t.co/ZKmd4JjZb2Just heard "Pogo" by Digitalism for the first time in years. Sounds so emblematic of early 2000's indie music that… https://t.co/WIO8oM9cZu @Julia_E_Leonard @juliarosen Yes. Source: I own a house. @juliarosen @Julia_E_Leonard No, but it COULD be. Where is your sense of wonder? https://t.co/DFUGsFQ2qR @juliarosen @Julia_E_Leonard JULIAS, have neither of you been to an IKEA?! https://t.co/Pmah6jQ5bn @Julia_E_Leonard @juliarosen I feel like I should really not weigh in on kashrut-related debates, but... I personal… https://t.co/rRYdwhLTsP @Julia_E_Leonard @juliarosen I will keep this in mind when I order my next bagel at the combination seafood and bag… https://t.co/My65RIQfcy @juliarosen Like, I could say "lox" and be understood, but I'd feel like the sort of person who goes to a bakery an… https://t.co/At527PXWoR
1/23
2020
@juliarosen I know that it is called lox, but virtually no one around here calls it that, so... /shrug @juliarosen Would I be over the line if I also had it dry or with hummus instead of cream cheese? Salmon is also acceptable to me. @TealBomb DO IT DO IT DO IT @juliarosen JALAPENO 4 LIFEI don't usually do this, but HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA @barstoolsports go fuck yourselves. https://t.co/aKuqTTvPeE @3vanSutton You're telling me rockets WON'T fix inequality??? @3vanSutton Shh... let him send the richest first -- and prooooomise no one will touch their bank accounts while they're gone...
1/22
2020
I'm not sure who I was supposed to help, but I am absolutely taking the opportunity to mark a task completed. https://t.co/wuM3XVo7W1
1/21
2020
@PatBoBomb That's why I always tell people "Let me infect you with my idea disease!"
1/15
2020
Suddenly my Discover Weekly is all contemporary jazz, dance music, and instrumental hip-hop... and I'm not totally upset about it.*clutches pearls* Are you saying sometimes low-level organizers talk shit about their opponents?! I CAN'T IMAGINE I… https://t.co/Z0eS2xC8m4 @Julia_E_Leonard @CREDOMobile Serving size: 1 tablespoon.
1/14
2020
I feel fortunate that my fave candidate will be viable, but I'm still disappointed that Cory Booker won't have any… https://t.co/Qb6jbIPJyC @Julia_E_Leonard At the end of that campaign, I took home the multicooker/pressure cooker from our office. It still… https://t.co/tglQNHFGgo
1/13
2020
If your civilization can be destroyed by gay and trans people existing, maybe it’s not much of a civilization to begin with.
Retweeted by Matt Denner @freestylexgp @LilithLovett All those characters, when you could've said just as much by farting on your keyboard...
1/12
2020
@juliarosen @WillOppermann @RAYGUNshirts You're welcome. @RAYGUNshirts @WillOppermann At least two of us will buy one. So I'm pretty sure that makes this shirt viable. @RAYGUNshirts @WillOppermann I need this in my life.
1/10
2020
I don't know what a 409k is, but if it's 8 better than a 401k, I want in. @nicoleindc And ever since, your life has spiraled into sects, mugs, and ramen bowls...
1/9
2020
@steveolson @jordankrueger Between the three of us, we do seemingly have a quorum to start Gray Beards for Action... if it comes to that.Well shit, @jordankrueger, I hope you find another job worthy of your talents.Well, I for one am gobsmacked by the news that CREDO Action is shutting down: https://t.co/h1g5PwjeK5 @garonsen @MMFlint "John Delaney has Nothing Better To Do"Please RT if you are done forever with Sen. Susan Collins (R-ME)
Retweeted by Matt Denner
1/7
2020
@juliarosen Wow, giving Goop a platform on Netflix seems shockingly irresponsible.
1/6
2020
Also, skipping a line isn't a benefit of self-serve kiosks when the line ONLY exists because a business replaced st… https://t.co/fjUZH9Kaz4Self-serve options can be great when you can skip a line or order in advance. But the actual process of using kiosk… https://t.co/q3XRYINkSVThese things are straight garbage. Who do you think is going to handle an order faster? A person who has to navig… https://t.co/jktoTmKP8j
1/4
2020
Not sure who needs to hear this today, but to my fellow emailers/social folks: Look over your copy and make sure yo… https://t.co/D4sWeQ1GEK
Retweeted by Matt DennerTrying to recommend a podcast to a friend is the new explaining an SNL sketch.
1/3
2019
Apparently, we have reached Peak Cruise. https://t.co/f9k8w2M5Puow
Retweeted by Matt Denner @JessLivMo If you were talking about a beloved politician from my own state that I've voted for, sure. If they we… https://t.co/ICU78DMK0P
12/20
2019
I just had the word "snuck" aggressively autocorrected to "sneaked" and I am VERY upset about it.
12/19
2019
This just won the internet https://t.co/vW7MNcvY1Y
Retweeted by Matt Denner
12/16
2019
There’s a lot to this point. Why didn’t you duct-tape a banana to the wall, and why didn’t you have a life’s body o… https://t.co/eM3DOYC2xq
Retweeted by Matt Dennerhaving a rough time with piano boss on luigi’s mansion. I don’t need tips on how to beat him. I know what to do. He’s just a bitch.
Retweeted by Matt Denner
12/14
2019
@juliarosen Yeah, for sake of clarity, I guess "tests" is not best. But then "proofs" also can get confused with wh… https://t.co/YGMPgxCR2y
12/10
2019

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