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Staff writer, @theathletic. Covering the game of soccer in North America, particularly its oddities. Photographer: @abandonedstates. Washed-up mechanic. 🇪🇸

875 Following   25,220 Followers   73,347 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/12/11

@grahamparkerfc call whenever you like, Graham. I've always enjoyed our chats.90% of the stress in my life comes from either this screen or the self-checkout screaming “PLEASE REMOVE ITEM FROM…
@brucemurrayHOF i mean, you have some experience in that department: notebook: ✔️Exclusive with new Orlando owner Mark Wilf ✔️How Atlanta's DP chase illustrates the need for more…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias Maurer @jeffrueter ugh, fine, espn+ it is @jeffrueter what the actual fuckLosada’s style has been a bit kick and run at times this year but it has *never* been boring. Fun one.#Crew96 has earned one point in club history after falling behind 3-0. (June 2, 2018 vs. Toronto, 3-3.) They are…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias Maurerwell this escalated quicklyfound a graphic i made that night. yes. anyways, inexplicably 3-0 now. @The_habs_fan94 found a graphic i made back then. incredible., remember that game when dc got outshot i want to say 24-1 and won 1-0? Montreal I think? Incredible stuff.Fantastic stuff from #DCU thus far - absorbing pressure, picking their spots, swinging dangerous balls in. Shrewd &… if he goes down there against birnbaum, he gets a PK! smart guyEtienne w/a potential dive of the year candidate there. Incredible.
@timorland @cedhoang i… wrote the story! @CCupo @everydaydude yeah but one of these messages is admirablesomehow worse than a MAGA sticker Philadelphia Union player development pipeline is one of the best in #MLS , and another academy talent is headi…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias MaurerI mean, I think I’ve already handled the Landon Donovan monument properly. Galaxy are giving Landon Donovan a statue. I think we all know what needs to happen. @itsmeglinehan meg i'm scared even just thinking about itHad a convo w/Jim Curtin today for an upcoming piece where we ended up reflecting on how fucked up that medical roo…
Jesus this is an elite fit from Andy Najar (sorry to cut you out @ClaudiaMPagan) @_Zeets @nathenmcvittie just popping in uninvited to say that i hate the way these look
@cboehm (check mark) only coach in MLS history to say that Cuauthemoc Blanco has "the quality of a princesses buttocks"✅ MLS experience ✅ Cosmopolitan overseas resume ✅ Speaks Spanish, understands Latin American locker-room culture ✅…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias Maureri would pay actual money, like maybe $1000 of my actual-ass salary, to see Chelís get hired by ATLLet’s be real. There’s only one option for #ATLUTD. of #ATLUTD fans out there pining for Tata right now. It's like they're watching their ex get dumped by their n…'ve got nothing linking him to #ATLUTD, but I still think Man City assistant Rodolfo Borrell would be an interesti… have known there's a definitive long read by the always brilliant @MLSist
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias MaurerAnd just like that: Paulo Fonseca has rebuffed #ATLUTD’s multi-year head coaching offer. Many had viewed him as a s… an exceptional performance by the #USMNT. Shrewd, gutsy, composed - use all of the hackneyed adjectives on th… with the Aldo “Buff” Donelli shoutout. Did not think we’d be hearing about the play-in game to the 1934 World Cup tonight.
I’ve been burned out on sports since the pandemic begin. Just incredibly cynical - it’s hard to even take an intere… you are Efra Álvarez the NWSL’s mental health coverage is robust because this defender is gonna require years of therapy to compart…
Breaking: #ATLUTD are zeroing in on a new head coach. Former AS Roma boss Paulo Fonseca has met with the club and…
A pair of notable front office departures for #DCU today: Dave Sanford, the club’s academy director, is departing,… week on BAM!, I gloat about the fact that I went 3/3 with my picks last week and celebrate by making three hor… weird, me too comfort for the Canadians but they have much to be proud of - and they’ve rapidly become one of the most enter… should be like hockey where when there’s some dust-up like this the goalies find each other and just brawlInter Miami watching that Pizarro goal it do any good to put someone like that on blast publicly? probably not. does it make me feel better about myself? to have “go change a tire” hurled at me as an insult by a racist follower. eat shit. to see mexico getting a hydration break because of the discriminatory chant
ok whatever maybe mlssoccer dot com was right about matt turner @_Zeets funny to see this; just finished “Final del Juego” last week. So good.*clicks on voice recorder* “it’s time to start the world’s most unsafe summer camp for children”Spent tonight teaching @cboehm’s seven-year-old how to change the oil in her dad’s car. For me, it was an opportuni…
Suppose... your house, at this time, happens to not be on fire. But you're paying taxes to fund the fire department…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias MaurerSo for 15 years Columbus hosts USMNT-Mexico with such distinction that everyone all the way up to the federation pr…
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias MaurerMust read from @ThompsonScribe.
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias Maurerwhen the joke writes itself @tiltapint @BrianStraus what is it with rapids and plagues @BrianStraus huge fan of events that require the large-scale construction of massive courses that will be abandoned someday
@Tater_Murray @americanrails hotttSomething I think a lot about is this free kick from Matt Reis.
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias Maurer @WeberKing @TheAthleticSCCR @itsmeglinehan @samstejskal @PaulTenorio @MidnightRiders DMs are opendc united, 2013 praying for a #USMNT goal because without that goal we won’t be able to watch the United States somehow lose to… a moment here to commend Lauren Milliet on even trying this s**t and also taking a moment to post just an al… Julian Gressel’s best game in a #DCU kit. There have been many, many contributing factors to DC being a mu… this era of extreme European emulation there is something oddly soothing about listening to Dave Johnson talk ab…
if Puerto Rico and Guam get their own Olympic teams, why can't DC?
Retweeted by Pablo Iglesias MaurerDrove from DC to Boston and back today. In one shot. 0/10 would not recommend.
looks like ATLUTD have their new head coach
Look, I didn’t *need* a new tool cart, per se, but… thanks, @matcotools @ariellec este maldito recibo, ¿por qué es tan largo? @AlexiLalas i think i just heard bruce arena scream @rcatanese look at the red and blue line and imagine jeff and i holding hands across that divide as we both plunge…’s not going well, guys, I see we’re pearl-clutching again at a player taking a dive. Hate to tell you this but shithousery isn’t goin… and I have failed so miserably at making nuanced, intelligent MLS bets that we’re now attempting to make incre…
Never hesitate to mute people. It’s helped me a lot to remember that social media is maybe the only thing in my lif… Acosta is slowly starting to thrive at Cincy. You love to see it, you really do.
imo the govt should be paying me to *not* reproduce @The_Kingpin28 @stujames75 thanks for reading!"If you're truly an agent of chaos, someone who celebrates it, you are rooting for Qatar to win the Gold Cup." -@cboehmMore exclusive insight & information into Heinze's dismissal and his tenure at #ATLUTD at large. Excellent work her…
Peter Nowak when he hears about Gabriel Heinze depriving #ATLUTD players of water something Nagel-inspired by my guy John Rippey at Key City Tattoo in Frederick. Always kills it. Look him up.
one of the nice things about MLS finally having one or two truly ambitious, big clubs is that they’re capable of ta… should hire Klinsmann’m about three years late to this but I finally listened to “Dr. Death” and my god, man, just….🤯attn @PulitzerPrizes @clintonyates my buddy @E_Nuggets_ has always said his walk up music would be Pump it Up, the Joe Budden classic of… looking for the skinny today on Heinze’s dismissal at #ATLUTD and realized I could just pick the phone up and c…
When the CGI tarps disappear and it’s just vancouver at a completely empty rio tinto stadium, they really called it “mls is back” @DanDuckw you don’t have to do it. it’s just that responses like that, for example, are why i just… don’t tweet… this year @DanDuckw sorry man, just feels like you’re trying to imply some sort of insensitivity on my part. i have watched m… @DanDuckw really man? why even point it out if it’s not intentional? what’s the implication here?
tHe CaLm BeFoRe tHE sTOrM story: I worked on Biz’ Range Rover regularly for a few years back in the early 2010s. Had a satellite dish on…
Was a real treat to have @itsmeglinehan fill in for me last week in @jeffrueter & I's BAM! MLS (&NWSL?) betting col… is finally gonna happen this August. Excited to have a few days in the city & meet a few of you, too. @ryanhunn saving my life on this friday AM