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Paul Krueger @NotLikeFreddy Laws & Jealous, Cauliflowernia

I write puns not tragedies. Books: STEEL CROW SAGA and LAST CALL AT THE NIGHTSHADE LOUNGE. Comics: EIGHTY-SIXED. Podcast: @MythosManual. Rep: @dongwon. he/him

422 Following   10,386 Followers   86,967 Tweets

Joined Twitter 6/12/11


@ventureforth FUCK I knew I forgot a big oneHELLO: @SkysongMA we take turns @vandroidhelsing or was it Rumpleteazer?I forgot to mention that the person in this bit is dressed like the Joker, no further questions at this time *steps… https://t.co/9IbLPHAGBU @JessCluess I call dibs on Skimbleshanks[Halloween 2020] ME & MY FRIENDS: *dressed as the cast of CATS* PERSON: so who are you all supposed to be ME & MY F… https://t.co/QICRZKL1eS90 years ago, hundreds of White men armed with pistols & clubs terrorized Filipino American men in Watsonville, CA… https://t.co/nwDr0vWo48
Retweeted by Paul Kruegerhttps://t.co/ojY43YY5Bv
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @blackladyblue yes goodAnother adobo experiment! https://t.co/XfyqcJpdLvIt’s very humbling, friends. STEEL CROW SAGA has inspired one fanfic and a bit of fanart, and those are so cool. Bu… https://t.co/ZoDC2HDFtE @justineraisin Adobo is a food that means the world to me. I’m so happy my work’s encouraged more people to give it a tryJudi Dench making the Jellicle Choice in the first version of Cats (2019): https://t.co/y0bcWmOQ51
Retweeted by Paul KruegerThe best side effect of STEEL CROW SAGA is everyone tweeting their flirtations with adobo at me, and I’m so proud o… https://t.co/ypujDph9r3 @Incoherentpanda This looks great! Nice job! @ItsDaniCarr @jeans4925 It’s remarkable, how much harder it hit than any other death in the series (at least for me)I am genuinely pissing myself, just heard a pal in the Kink Kommunity had a set up of Class Play with a posh lass w… https://t.co/693lD1hHTR
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @mommajessiec I want to block you for this insult, but I appear to have just crumbled away into dustMe, in my teens: This radio station is playing my jams. Me, in my 20s: This bar is playing my jams. Me, in my 3… https://t.co/EgNKGMD02b
Retweeted by Paul KruegerSirius Black. I got there, read it, and then flipped back a few pages to try again, as if I’d merely taken a wrong… https://t.co/AV7riz1g6Ythis thread is a RIDE https://t.co/n0onLtQgSf @Quincetessence Arroz caldoAnother sketchbook flip-through! This was from the same sketchbook from yesterday! 🌸✨ https://t.co/dzOlzG7FQY
Retweeted by Paul Kruegerjust some kids being kids 😼😊🎣 https://t.co/y6JeLYgDwD
Retweeted by Paul Kruegertala: jimuro, can you do me a favour? jimuro: i would literally die for you but go on.
Retweeted by Paul KruegerMassive Placebo fan though https://t.co/xjdnEuC23C
Retweeted by Paul Kruegertonight, I watched FAST COLOR I did not like FAST COLOR @GregCypress Thanks for reading!my friends & I routinely have “bracket nights” where we pick 16 of something (tonight it’s “types of chairs”) & arg… https://t.co/e7UCIW4rR8
Retweeted by Paul KruegerAs a man with a thus far useless writing degree, I hope to one day finish something half as clean and compelling as… https://t.co/4ogOGT1vyt
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @sqiouyilu Scotland, PA, the Macbeth adaptation that takes place at a little Pennsylvania diner @ScottMendelson i'm getting a lot of "triggered lol" in my mentions right now, but i also like to give the benefit… https://t.co/7JJ9TY0quX @ScottMendelson cool thanks @ScottMendelson is the gif supposed to convey that you crying because you too were disappointed by TROS, or are you… https://t.co/Z0R8joXV6Q @MunnDNitro i like that he died. it was the right call. maybe the only good narrative decision that the film made anyway enjoy your blockI will never forget when my mom tried to use her cancer to get my sisters boyfriend of 7 years to propose by saying… https://t.co/5WcpTFdLYr
Retweeted by Paul Kruegervideo games love to force you to kill people and then be like "bro did you know that was people you killed"
Retweeted by Paul Krueger"Hustlers" and the first "Magic Mike" do a better job of explaining the 2008 financial crisis than any film actuall… https://t.co/QO4m15V4EV
Retweeted by Paul KruegerI have no idea who this is, and I don't have yellow eyes... https://t.co/kMkL65NC5e
Retweeted by Paul KruegerShow me your fantasy illustration portfolio with a diverse range of ethnicities. (If you’re looking for work I migh… https://t.co/tfk5TcS68L
Retweeted by Paul Kruegermore like crapitalism
Retweeted by Paul KruegerStacker Pentecost https://t.co/EUcvVgxZlQ @CuppaFalcon I agree. That’s why Rise was so badsample such dark delights, and emerge from the night forever changed shop ikea https://t.co/P5UOhP0LiqWow, this blew up. If you enjoyed this post, please consider donating to victims of the Taal volcano eruption And… https://t.co/GZO5FeocN6 @OneLuckyGay would’ve wrote it if I’d meant it, kiddowhat kitchen island would be complete without a bathroom sink https://t.co/17XaLk0YgU
1/19
2020
@TrendsLikeThese @HogSandwich @courtenlow oh haibro I fuckin love you bro let’s fuckin start a life together bro https://t.co/VllRSJrP6sIt’s a bittersweet https://t.co/7PwVajN3EQ畫一下制服京 https://t.co/xA52qAOy3P
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @CathyWatness Thank you so much for reading! I’m really proud of both worldsJust finished @NotLikeFreddy's Last Call At The Nightshade Lounge, and I absolutely loved it! Both this and his Ste… https://t.co/LECEIi7Aym
Retweeted by Paul KruegerIs this... Pokemon? https://t.co/snLXwhAqpT
Retweeted by Paul KruegerJupiter Ascending deserved a trilogy. A glorious increasingly batshit trilogy. https://t.co/RA2WQDGQrq
Retweeted by Paul KruegerOther examples include THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE WEIRD, the ATLA episode “The Chase,” and uh steel crow sagaDarth Vader serves no narrative function in Rogue One https://t.co/FlF1KoqR71
Retweeted by Paul KruegerI keep seeing people comparing Meghan Markle to Yoko Ono and reflecting that 1) that’s pretty apt but 2) not for the reason they think
Retweeted by Paul KruegerOh man, especially if one or more of the factions have had run-ins with the main characters but have never encounte… https://t.co/3Fa37BFlthI’m rewatching OUTLAW STAR, and perfect it ain’t, but it has one of my favorite tropes: a whole bunch of different… https://t.co/GiP7S0yEYK @AlexandraErin I’m CACKLING @AlexandraErin Yeah this tweet was very loud @PhrasesPages @tashadrinkstea You should start with EMPIRE OF SAND! It’s really goodFilipino breakfast would like a word. https://t.co/3I5cM1VKDK https://t.co/idDLTdHcJ1
Retweeted by Paul Kruegerany combat gameplay that has things like “dodge” and “parry” has no use to me. as far as im concerned the only stra… https://t.co/nU3a8tPafx
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @SamSykesSwears @Trungles stop treating me like a kikkoboy when i’m a full-grown https://t.co/q1jCaBKn5r @Trungles i’m a salty little bottle of red boat fish sauceThe Last Jedi https://t.co/fAiBGAWrVTuuuwu (say do you remember) uuuwu (dancing in september)
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @SaraAMueller @ChrisXMorse Somedayit's Railway Law that if anyone dies on the train, they must close up the coach and call for Skimbleshanks. and nob… https://t.co/05EhCy0nXt
Retweeted by Paul Kruegertrying to work https://t.co/FSxZ6NBnYc
Retweeted by Paul Kruegerah dang, my cake is slightly too big for the thing i was gonna store it in if only there were some way i could mak… https://t.co/ARUI4Cd8QDEvery mega-viral tweet has an exhausted follow-up right beneath it saying "yes, I'm aware an earth year is technica… https://t.co/MUJWcTTIqW
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @glitzandshadows it never even would've been a meme if it was the other way ffsITS LITTLE A L I T T L E A
Retweeted by Paul Kruegerdiversity is good https://t.co/VO3SPF8mIr
Retweeted by Paul Kruegeri don’t know what to do with myself but if this tweet gets 100 RTs rapidly i’ll go stay in a hotel that is actually a haunted boat
Retweeted by Paul KruegerPeople are too proud of the movies they dislike. https://t.co/5KqPKx8bup
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @TiniHoward you know, after a while you just kind of learn to tune out the death parrots @jamiroqueer as an ardent home cook, i can attest from personal experience that sometimes the very best creations come about by accidentYup. I've read a lot of the books that would be considered The Classics, and not a single one of them altered the e… https://t.co/UhOFPmHdZSI dunno. Maybe it's naïve of me. Maybe all the critics who follow me are now busily slamming the unfollow button. B… https://t.co/dUQvt2hWI2 @juliaereck god, and there's SO MUCH to dig into about why certain subject matters/genres are even considered more… https://t.co/VWF3pJ444Pdoes that mean CATS is a better film? no. but it also doesn't mean it's worse. it means that it was aimed at an aud… https://t.co/60YyFlAdQJUS was technically accomplished ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD was technically accomplished CAPTAIN MARVEL was techn… https://t.co/oJtbP2AMwYi really used to believe that when it came to art there was an Objective Good and Objective Bad, and someone could… https://t.co/4M3L0gENxwthe older i get, the more the idea of dividing cinema up into "good" and "bad" movies feels increasingly pointless https://t.co/qz60gb5STv
1/18
2020
this is definitely an “are you fucking kidding me?” kinda day.
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @visyap oooh arroz a la cubano, i actually just got a thing of raisins, good call @mfpseth yes @tashadrinkstea @orbitbooks @triadaus this sounds so cool! congratulations!My hands are shaking. Oh my god. I can officially tell you THE JASMINE THRONE - my vengeful desi, f/f epic fantas… https://t.co/Uv7IR36SYF
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @ChrisXMorse it'd have to be better than mine, and that's not possibleYou have two pounds of ground beef (or turkey or whatever). Do you make:"Hustle culture" is legitimately such an impressive scam. Straight-up selling the 19th-century American Protestant… https://t.co/W9OySjqmBf
Retweeted by Paul KruegerCATS (2019) https://t.co/u5OQiAvk8I
Retweeted by Paul Krueger @zhandlen I think even a few years ago, if Watchmen had happened and then ended after one season, I think there wou… https://t.co/oN8c0VasKb
1/17
2020

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