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Ashley Reese @offbeatorbit Brooklyn via Los Angeles

Staff writer at @jezebel. Hates mint chocolate. Wrote a column about her vag once.

1,672 Following   8,775 Followers   128,517 Tweets

Joined Twitter 2/7/09

nearing supercritical levels of youth pastor energy
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseOh but a crab pinched my toe when I was in the ocean. Rude :/Like why is this man being recognized on his birthday?Love 2 learn and all but interesting choice of Wikipedia to make a former Rhodesian politician and avowed white sup…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseI went to the beach today. It was great. I’m sleepy. That’s all.Drawing a pizza with the word pizza
Retweeted by Ashley Reeseeveryday it's some "sex is an energy transaction and your energy CREDIT is bad because you have TOO! much! INTERCOU…
Retweeted by Ashley Reesei'm begging you to please stop putting these budget third eye chakra people on my timeline, PLEASE
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @crushsong Happy bday!she’s 16 I didn’t know that. this is very normal 16 year old behavior please let these gay ass children be weird an…
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @half__shadow Comrades on the *NSYNC forumI would love to know what prompted this loool’m losing it @rosavertov I did!Pls respond to this very important poll.
Interconnectivity of girls and nature, she is a leader, she is green conscious, she is pushing our culture forward,…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseThe side that knows that white rear lights activate when you drive in reverse!!! @big_nkrumah The right side!Trying to settle an argument: Did you know that white rear lights are activated when a car is driving in reverse? @libbycwatson She’s cutenot a white lady pretending she invented sleep bonnets and selling them for $100
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseLove all the angry Gen X-ers in the replies trying to pretend that internet access was a formative part of the aver… we be called this instead of millennials now
Retweeted by Ashley ReesePls the streets need to know @capturedtracksIs new diiv comin? 👀TREVANTE HASN'T BEEN CASTED IN A MOVIE IN TWO YEARS NOW PLEASE HOW MANY TIMES WILL I HAVE TO WATCH HIM CLAP SANDRA…
Retweeted by Ashley Reesegiving these to the lucky lady that streams old town road the most this week
Retweeted by Ashley ReesePOV: you’re walking home from your friend’s house and you get mugged by a tiktok cosplayer
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseDjdjdkoalsjsudksksjdjdj @joaniesucks I dream of a high neck wedding dress.Everything is terrible, but here is Benne trying to go on the lam with an entire bag of grapes.
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseMe: wow heard the AC was bad for the environment :( better cut down!!! Also me: *CRANKS UP MY CENTRAL AC TO THE ULTIMATE LIMIT*omg
This heat wave has the catcallers sluggish and confused. The construction workers on my block were yelling things l…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseOnce you got in, you were basically here for good, unless you got into radical left wing politics. Nothing like the…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseWhite people insisting their European ancestors came “legally” during a period where the US had open borders and di…
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @_matthewlawson Happy bday!the movie ‘yesterday’ but danny dyer is the only person who remembers vine
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @daniecal The clothes are just *chefs kiss*This kind of access journalism is so corrosive. it’s Tucker Carlson who’s interviewing her. @AsiaChloeBrown I love her“It came out of left field.” Narrator: It did not.
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseGive @ChristyRomano all the credit for all of us knowing that we went to the moon... in 1969. Not 1970 but a year…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseHoly shit know we went to the moon in 1969 because of Ren Stevens
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseI’m really screaming how do people end up being this stupid? 1995 Chicago heat wave killed over 700 people. Check in on the elderly.
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @elluithauren Miranda or Jack?
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseI want my friend out.. I appreciate you trying to help him. But while your at it @realDonaldTrump can you also let those kids out of cages?
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseDinkleberg: Timmy Turner’s Dad:
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseNow that it's officially the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, here's a lovely video of Buzz Aldrin punching a…
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @marsisbored I’ve thought about doing something like this too. NYC apartment also just accumulate grime so quickly… @maxeduction With his lil shortsomg he was stanning beyonce, with his lil shorts awww
Retweeted by Ashley Reesenyc goths, stay strong. this heat will pass, your will to wear all black and be goth to your core will not.
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @BlckPowerBottom @PageSix OMGLMFAO Trump call made it worse
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @meaganrosae Ahhh that sounds fun @meaganrosae Who are you seeingI just straight up don’t remember 2017.Just wanted to share the craziest shit I seen/heard today
Retweeted by Ashley Reeserich people contacting other rich + racist people in order to free another rich person who doesn’t care about poor…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseDo sitcoms with laugh tracks still do that thing where instead of a real episode it’s just 95% clips from old episodes stringed together? @_grendan I asked him and he said Steam! @kmcdonovgh ChillApparently the iron production is steady.Rob is currently obsessed with a game called Workers and Resources Soviet Republic which is basically like a city b… @trillharris I don’t hate it! But honestly it stressed me out to watch him play it. So much fighting with monsters. @disparate It has its moments.Meanwhile the heat index in Chicago sits at 105 and Pitchfork Music Festival is still going, because the city knows…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseIf I have to walk into the living room one day and hear Henry Cavill ask someone if they want to play gwent or some… if watching my boyfriend play this game nonstop for months wasn’t enough!!!!!!!!!!!! @AkilahObviously @thebasementtan I’m drooling @ these clothesHi, Twitter! I completed this project on July 19, 2019. Here you can enjoy all 647 unique outfits worn by Marlo Tho…
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseLike, I’m so mad that Rachel and Courtney Cox even let chandler and Joey do that to them!!!!!!!Ash-Ash La Bahn Mi apartment swap subplot on Friends is so unrealistic. Two of your friends forcing you out of your apartment ove…’m so confused by all the different 90 Day Fiancé titles. What is the chronological order?????almost accidentally got handed the artist wristband of Parquet Courts’s Austin Brown #P4kFest
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @ecareyo
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseWow
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @marsisbored It is def a pick me thing. They love weird hygiene shit as if they’ve never skipped a shower in their lives @etherealbunny like I hate the fetishization of labor and everything but I would never admit to having this much time in the day lol @fffffrida Taqueria Milear, taquiera Saint marks, tacos Morelos (specifically the chorizo burrito)lol @marsisbored She has to be lying...some of you have enough time in the day to take 3+ showers on average within a 24 hour period? @domcamatic Hit me up! @_Demisa How her shower feels seeing her coming in for the 4th shower
Retweeted by Ashley ReeseMayor Pete looks like the type of dude to rub his hands together and say somethin like “Ohhh boy, come to papa” whe…
Retweeted by Ashley Reese @husselrose This might be the one year anniversary of That Night. Or maybe it was in June. Or August. WHATEVER, WHAT A NIGHT. @husselrose U betta @tigerhologram The indie/garage/disco-punk one! @tigerhologram I do have an extra free ticket... @rosavertov (This being a thing, not your mom specifically lool) @rosavertov I didn’t know about thisI think I’m just gonna go next month, ya girl is kinda exhausted