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cocreator of the HBO show Animals. demon baby sent from hell.

1,453 Following   6,356 Followers   9,471 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/24/11

@Dave_Horwitz Actually a dual doc about Kony and the dude who did the campaign’s meltdown would be......... fyre
sees anyone; @scharpling Oh my god this is so great @twinsistermusic @coolingpie out on my birthday wat a giftOne time someone I know was with Jennifer Anniston and she didn’t know what Razor Scooters were @fattonyrap @VICELAND @zackfox @sandyhonig @MsReeezy Amazing love this WILL WATCH
@immicrowavable I’ll mail you some new but you gotta pay 5.99 plus shipping & handling LIKE EVERYONE ELSE*hagrid kicks down the front door* yer a libtard harry*ben affleck wakes up super hungover* wait was i batman for a secondRip cant wait to wake up tomorrow and write more cartoons because when im fifty and managing a small new jersey antiq… shoulda shot all the live action with that filter! @TeamYouTube tu brute mama tambien @TeamYouTube It doesn't exist anymore because it mysteriously got deleted?!! That's what this is all about! Can you… at what point is it stolen valor @ericdadourian @danlicatasucks A very muscular 90s body builder that was kinda famous i guess @danlicatasucks True story my mom cut his hair & had to use two hair cutting capes around his neck
@TeamYouTube Hey! Still didn't get an email?? Can we take this to DM?*born* Am I good enough? How about now How about now How about now How about now How about now How about now How…
Retweeted by phil matarese @chrissyteigen What if I told u we’ve been to 69 already rain in the desert,,, at the worst times in my life,,, i find myself joining a hardcore band,,,
Props to this guy picking up our convo almost 3 years later. @paulrust That doc broke my heart!was thinking about ‘Dumb and Dumber’ today and realized it’s never going to go away and I found that comforting @AlisonAgosti clearly CGI i did the research i put in the time he's never kissed @TeamYouTube @TeamYouTube "no content available"
@adamadamwade @bbarbot 😃I've just started S02 of Animals the HBO animated series and it's WAY more epic that the first. That mini crossover…
Retweeted by phil matareseI finished watching the criminally underrated #AnimalsHBO today. 'The Trial' should have been on every best of list…
Retweeted by phil matarese @TeamYouTube Wups good point. Yes I can sign into youtube with that email. But everything is totally wiped. @Dave_Horwitz keep in mind i did NOT have the money to buy this terrible watch a credits test i made for #AnimalsHBO season three. Dunno why we didn't go with this it's super cute. @TeamYouTube @YTCreators everything got deleted from my account i have my login and everything. please DM @jonahray @FUCKEDUP like i want the full albums of all the "bands" that are on it. @jonahray @FUCKEDUP it's like the world's greatest Fucked Up mixtape? i love it so much
let go
Retweeted by phil matareseone time my friend's pug farted so bad it gave my other friend a nosebleed. it was the greatest moment of my life. @Brennan_Full it's really really special.
@ShutUpAndrosky HERE I AM DOING EAAAVERYTHING I CANart. my god how annoying I cut it too soon. Here’s full @danguterman me2“One time when I was in a coma I was a bee and I had sex with my mom.” For some reason that line, from the 2gether… @rejectedjokes @KayKayCannon @captdope @ikebarinholtz @lizzo When Ike opens up and starts crying in the street... I teared up @XXL congratulations juelz santana
Fulfilled a lifelong dream of pestering Brian Tyree Henry to smoke weed with me #room104 @GayRodney HahahaI was just informed that Boy from Bird Box was the kid that voiced Frisbee! The Rock ever kissed in a movie? i can't picture it.
Thank you HBO. See everyone it’s possible to be cordial with your Exes. @HBO Phil @laurenlapkus @mikelucianosup @Gabrus @earwolf @zombieparmesan shootExtremely rare (not by choice) podcast appearance by Phil and mike. Not many are funnier than Lauren and Jon I love… @earwolf @laurenlapkus @RBTVpod @philmatarese @mikelucianosup try again!
If I was a dog I would not lick my own ass. I would carry around a small package of wet wipes, remove a wet wipe, t…
Sometimes when I’m trying on an outfit I’ll pretend I’m on my phone because I know that’s how most people will see… people have 12 close friends like they’re a friggin movie character? That’s too many friends. Fluctuate betwee…✨ANNOUNCEMENT✨ Here is a piece I made about the days of Abraham and Isaac (and Sarah), starring @HMonHBO ‘s Ben Sin…
Retweeted by phil matarese @DFLEISCHERCAMP @HMonHBO @verovidetta Dean you always do the damn thang you’re the bestnone of us have added new friends on Facebook for like 10 years how is it still going @nickweidenfeld @Bossip @tomnewman3 @mikelucianosup @HBO Idk the store seems to be down & we were also supposed to get wallet pins who know… @nabeelshaikh sounds like heaven to me!put on Fang Island's 2010 s/t for the first time in years and it completely changed my worldview i actually believe in god again @douchebaggette @YTCreators @TeamYouTube I have they’re not!was able to log back in but now it's all gone! @YTCreators ?? @TeamYouTube ?
A$AP Phil (Just trying this on)
“Don’t Wake Daddy” (2019) for your consideration got in one little fight and my mom got scared She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air' And… @caitiedelaney I just butchered hard boiled eggs
donate now
Retweeted by phil matarese @jonahray @JonahRaydio
🇬🇧 🚨🇬🇧🚨🇬🇧 UK WELCUM BACK TOMORROW NOIGHT, MIDDIE & A QUATAH (12:15am) 5th grade sex-ed I got so overwhelmed I lost my vision and had to be wheelchaired out @iMayola Hahaha that was the impetus yesMy favorite way to reveal two characters are siblings? EASY. Drop a big ole muthafuckin “Mom called...”
I liked these books from 2018 - Beastie Boys Book - Billion Dollar Whale - Shitshow! - Bad Blood - Twilight of t… favorite online interaction of last year send nudes N - new U - U2 D - downloaded automatically E - eeeeetsss, S - ssssaBEAUTIFULDAY
@janeshrahlan Wait which one!Headspace, NOT NOW
@KunkelTron are you relation to Will?!this year I grew a lot.... Of Hair!!!! Hahaha! Fuck man I’m depressed @kanyewest U guys take the pool line I would think you’d use XL or at least UberXMay the New Year bring you love, joy, riches and luck. May you be amazed, astonished and truly awestruck. But if… @DanSpenser I was just thinking about how amazing it is some people can do flips @comic_mischief I have watched Sex And The City for an entire dayMe to negative shit trying to hitch a ride into 2019’t believe it’s almost 2013
My dad is wondering if he should take 18 to 520. Thoughts
@TomLavery89 Japanese Breakfast!! @Jbrekkie @patrick_brice @JensenClan88 @Buncahn For the last time I’m not going with youBrought my bros to the Japanese Breakfast show last night and they were str8 up MOVED
@iMayola Ahahhaah @tiarawhyy @gmail @YouTube Thanks!2019 we retire people sharing personal news with “so... I did a thing” or “umm okay I wrote something” and especially “mama I made caca”