Sign in with Twitter

Username:

Ben Schwartz @rejectedjokes Los Angeles, CA

Middleditch & Schwartz, The Afterparty, Space Force, Sonic, Standing Up Falling Down, Parks & Rec, House of Lies, MODOK, Ducktales, TMNT, Earliest Show.

954 Following   1,263,490 Followers   11,521 Tweets

Joined Twitter 3/27/09


What a fucking mess. #MiddleditchAndSchwartz https://t.co/08oPvAzRM0 @PedroPascal1 Miss you, sweet human. @JeffreyShreck @LeeMajdoub @NaotoOhshima @JimCarrey @iamtikasumpter @adampally @natasharothwell happy birthday!!!… https://t.co/VYkfaXydadI have been dehydrated since Thanksgiving.
12/1
2020
@DCpierson @DannyTRS hoy shit. dan. listen to dc. he's on to something stage left even. @ABrightMonster @Etsy ... you ok man? Seems like the quarantine is getting to you. @ABrightMonster @Etsy should have kept that last tweet to yourself. @ABrightMonster @Etsy anything you can say to etsy, you can say to me. @MaryLynnRajskub THANK YOU MARY YOU ARE VERY KIND AND TALENTED. Just watched an episode of Sanders you were in a fe… https://t.co/xdJAqqnL4aThis wonderful movie is now available anywhere you can rent/buy films on your TV or electronic devices.… https://t.co/AcnJiBiyFSUS coronavirus cases by month in 2020: March: 186,200 April: 883,199 May: 723,166 June: 845,736 July: 1,926,970 Au… https://t.co/bsb3ucIJzT
Retweeted by Ben SchwartzHappy Birthday to the icon who gave us all so much. Missing you lots today Garry. https://t.co/3gZB9rNP0O
11/30
2020
@DonCheadle https://t.co/BjoyOH1uduHappy birthday to the legend @DonCheadle. This is the wallpaper on my phone. He forced me to put it on there 5 year… https://t.co/bHU35aCxPu @aubreymdavis @XGames @rachelsmitts Thank you for your art. @Lin_Manuel @netflix @MComitini AYYYYYEEEEEEEEE. CONGRATS!!! @zachbraff Hi Zach.How to with John Wilson is extraordinary. Just a wonderful and hilarious show. @howtojohnwilson.
11/29
2020
@whattheelle98 ... OH NO... @_daphnemadelyn ... @chrizmillr DON'T GIVE IT A SONG!!! It's terrifying enough without its own theme music, chris! @robreiner Love this.When the light hits my lamp just right, it’s fucking terrifying. https://t.co/LcoyFKX86D @RedHourBen @SteveMartinToGo Ditto. Truly an incredible movie.🚨BREAKING: 900,000 Georgians have requested their ballots for the January 5 runoff elections. Request yours today a… https://t.co/NFGblAZFIv
Retweeted by Ben SchwartzThanksgiving leftovers- "Let's run it back!"
11/28
2020
@michaelianblack @themandalorian @PedroPascal1 ... @michaelianblack @themandalorian @PedroPascal1 Sorry. What did you do on this one?Ooooooo baby have I been loving @themandalorian. I mean it’s 8AM and I’m happily up watching @PedroPascal1 tell me which way is the way.Is there Thanksgiving music? If things were normal, what would you listen to with your family during Thanksgiving?
11/27
2020
Even during a pandemic, the turkeys are not safe.If you could spare a moment. If you could spare a few steps. If you could spare a few dollars. Learn a little more… https://t.co/uYXmsNHlgy
Retweeted by Ben SchwartzT.U.R.T.L.E. POWER! Look at our beautiful boys! Thank you to whoever is in that Leo costume, making my dude look go… https://t.co/JxP2xbcjam @wolfboy74 was this from this year's parade??? @JenniKonner with only you in chicago. yes of course. @JenniKonner I’d like to write this movie with you.
11/26
2020
@KidCudi YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS??? @philiplord “The prestige” https://t.co/d15RPcdgHL @ABrightMonster #KevinKontent
11/25
2020
@philiplord I guess we can do just a trilogy if you only want to gently graze the legacy of the 0-5 years of mr mint. @DisneyTVA IN MY BOOK IT IS STILL YOUR BIRTHDAY WONDERFUL @FrankAngones @georgiaEtennant YOU WOULDNT?!?! @MarkDuplass I’d like to buy the rights to this/droopy’s story. @rolopez42 https://t.co/krOt6hKer4
11/23
2020
@georgiaEtennant Would have been a great question!!! @georgiaEtennant Georgia. What would your question have been?what a fun 30 minutes of chatting. Have a great sunday! Thanksgiving is right there waiting for us at the end of th… https://t.co/sd2oQFWV5m @VNiederman both great for different reasons. First felt like the first of its speedy kind. Second felt like even more fun and excitement! @KeriReddy85 I am afraid of most scary rollercoasters but this sounds like a super fun idea!!! @aweilhammer on my laptop. But sometimes i'll print it out when i'm doing my final edits on a movie script and do t… https://t.co/AvIwbPw1Xi @brooke_vo I look the most like beaker. But it's hard not to say Kermit or fozzie. @BahiRatchet625 video game was ori and the will of the wisps. I loved that game. Both Oris thought they were beautiful. @jaramardo_ Should be how it ended. Anyone there live that can confirm? @blumenfeld don't. @DefNotaPerve my relationship with @tyson_hesse is as follows- 1st off- a wonderful, creative, talented, kind human… https://t.co/A0r9VkkVTk @_drobson vaccines? @MsMichaelaGrant I have never seen the tv show. But i am CERTAIN @gladdyfisher can answer any question you have about the show. @katydondz right now it's @reeses peanut butter cups. the OG. in the freezer. @carellsmulaney not special- but sketch show- i think you should leave is amazing. @ufgatorphil i started by freelance writing monologue jokes for letterman. Maybe one day down the line? @BennettResnik there was a town hall scene where Jean-Ralphio said something at a town hall, and then when i was ex… https://t.co/V4DMM7fuWu @schwartzjokes I want to visit new zealand!!! Hoping to get there sometime in the next cluster of years. @knopesmeyer i don't remember... Maybe! @philiplord the more i look at this mr mint picture, the more i think it's a horror movie. @RerezTV @netflix thanks Shane! Hoping we can get out there safely in 2021. @ixodw been listening to the new @BustaRhymes a whole bunch the past few weeks. @schwartzjokes incredible!!! @srydatwasmaren stuffing. Also the sweet potatoes with marshmallows on top... @jay_mckevitt_ HUG MY FAMILY IN NY @jvas831 there are countless in both. I wish I could have played with John Candy, Harold Ramis, Walter Matthau. Wou… https://t.co/ctchp0xcE7 @okaycayla Even though I shower every day, I don't put shampoo and conditioner in my hair every day. Someone told m… https://t.co/vDPnEGQVqH @schwa24 we talking breakfast- everything bagel, toasted, veggie cream cheese, lox. we talking lunch- everything b… https://t.co/wrogaH8ebL @miagandrea They Reminisce Over You (T.R.O.Y.)- Pete Rock & C.L. Smooth @bigheadhannah probably Home Alone. But I will think about it some more. @nkwalker We haven't done any warm up games in a long time but I used to love making up our own. We had some fun so… https://t.co/e7PNtRtigtShall we 30 minute twitter Q and A? Toss over some Qs and I'll try my best to hit over some As. https://t.co/BxFInY2cqDIf you haven't watched this yet, seriously pencil in some time next week. Hands down my favorite thing I saw on… https://t.co/PIvaYJsrPJ
Retweeted by Ben SchwartzMy all time top Netflix recommendation!! Helps you forget everything for an hour and gives you a much needed tears… https://t.co/IZVllCsNIm
Retweeted by Ben Schwartz @toddbarry You get the role Todd? @RyanPezold @netflix Can you link it here?
11/22
2020
@Kenny_Mayne You think?I don't know why but the past week there has been a beautiful resurgence of people finding and watching our… https://t.co/T8fS3l8VKP @GlennHowerton I am very pro this photograph and would like to see more. @JonKasdan Thank you Jon. This will do nicely. @JonKasdan Take me through what’s happening here.
11/21
2020
@philiplord Dibs on mr mint. https://t.co/xdNnIKsCuJ @hwinkler4real You most certainly cannot. Everything is exactly as it should be. @DEADLINE Yay @DannyTRS!!!!!!! @ABrightMonster Don’t read about it. Just watch. You will not believe what happens to the house. Also. I hope you like doooogs!!! @ABrightMonster You seen Up? That doc is incredible. @RawsonThurber Congrats Rawson! @Richard_Schiff Oh I’ve been here my friend. I’ve always been here. https://t.co/AAufFLsVRlOne of the most exciting moments in my childhood was figuring out that cans can do this if there’s enough liquid in… https://t.co/tp1ra3cStd
11/20
2020
@Richard_Schiff @thesheilakelley happy and relieved you're feeling better schiff!!! @fowltown THIS IS AMAZING NEWS. CONGRATS MAN!!!All of those months living amongst hedgehogs has finally paid off. Thanks to the @CriticsChoice super awards for sh… https://t.co/OhnwTmwhFgJust a heads up, this came out in March of 2019. Before the madness had peaked its head fully out.Get ready for goofs! https://t.co/axkNdN8UVi @PeterHoare GO GET EM PETER!!!
11/19
2020
Gala for @Film2future tomorrow. Check out all the info below on what this wonderful group of humans are doing to ma… https://t.co/Hn2Vb9TMqP
11/18
2020

0