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Just a shark, shouting into the void, heard by only the winds. And some weird bots.

191 Following   6 Followers   254 Tweets

Joined Twitter 9/17/11


@feeltheheath Play: Theater Neat. Musical: Theater on the Rocks.
7/1
2020
@EvanMcMullin Cool. Worked last time.
6/25
2020
@WhiteHouse This is literal garbage. It fails morally and aesthetically.
6/2
2020
@RyanLizza @politico “What the fuck, guys?”
6/1
2020
@RaeEarl It’s Moby Dick, but the whale has rabies.
5/26
2020
Ruin a letter by changing one letter. I’ll start: T
5/23
2020
@Casey_Mink Fondly remembering how the show just stopped dead every time somebody even mentioned King Lear. @jonnysun Photosynthesis! A game where you compete to have the tallest trees growing in the richest soil!
5/19
2020
@wearyhobo Political ads aren’t aimed at people who intellectually dissect political ads. @stokel Also, releasing a professionally produced filmed version of a now years-old musical does not in any way neg… https://t.co/W7mnpbloqj
5/12
2020
@page88 @LPDonovan The Good Place
5/11
2020
@NateSilver538 If Trump were good at his job he’d have a better chance of being re-elected shouldn’t even count as a take.
5/10
2020
@courtneyafoster @jessiejuwono @jennyjaffe Actually, Chicago might be a good example. I’m guessing the revival albu… https://t.co/vn3fIZroLG
5/7
2020
@ASegals Trump doesn’t have those cat like reflexes and would never be able to dodge that shoe.
5/4
2020
@petermarksdrama This was theater. Filmed performances that were presented live, not theater. But this felt like th… https://t.co/fYtvpM3F8J
5/1
2020
@parabasis I once passed Brantley in the bathroom at the Beaumont, but now I’m wondering if it was Fred actually.
4/22
2020
@PFTompkins According to Twitter I might be interested in bunch of broad movie-related topics or you specifically. https://t.co/KKCl0iIbDr
4/20
2020
Waiting out the pandemic in this high security bunker. @animalcrossing #animalcrossing https://t.co/ZkCAW3qa3K
4/18
2020
@PataphysicalSci @petermarksdrama Sounds like they wish they were competition for BroadwayHD.
4/17
2020
@tmavuram The primary voters who voted for Biden (I’m not one of them) don’t vote for policy positions. They vote f… https://t.co/YGjCPBcZPq
4/11
2020
@jeremyoharris @ASoloski Very much appreciate your replies on this subject. I am very curious about the entire topic. @jeremyoharris @ASoloski I do too! But I can’t hold the hand of my friend digitally and feel the same comfort. It f… https://t.co/SkDkjXhbog @jeremyoharris @ASoloski Absolutely! But I am alone in my apartment. Experiences are different when we’re not alone… https://t.co/v2L6KoXxi0 @ASoloski @jeremyoharris When we’re talking about “this thing happened but the barriers to seeing it were too high”… https://t.co/glBs9lzLUz
4/10
2020
@parabasis I thought they tried to share a chartered plane with 40 other people, which would have been ~2500 each,… https://t.co/r9UXmBQPA7
4/5
2020
@parabasis THANK YOU for saying something. Thought I was going crazy.
3/25
2020
@ASoloski Here I am alone in my apartment with neither footmen nor chambermaids. Were they even available at Trader Joe’s?Who will invent the dating app for singles alone in their apartments during a #pandemic ????????
3/15
2020
@FluentMundo Would love an answer to this question. @ChaseSupport What do you suggest I do about my hotel booking in Rome in three days? On Tuesday you told me to call… https://t.co/iSuzWKenE9
3/14
2020
@Helen_E_Shaw (For example. The same idea with non-famous people is obviously just as good.) @Helen_E_Shaw I would pay to see (and help organize) live-streamed readings of fun plays and musicals by profession… https://t.co/KgXKYKydt6 @jdickerson I have a hotel in ROME that is refusing to refund my nonrefundable room next week.
3/12
2020
@PanderShirts And the online junk, which is essentially a sideshow, is but one of many data points that causes some… https://t.co/ZG4lKmIK3s @PanderShirts This is not why people are hesitant to throw their support behind Sanders and it’s frustrating to see… https://t.co/t6TJpM9f27
3/7
2020
Why is @vox so proud of its awful crossword? https://t.co/Obl3Y6teYV
3/6
2020
@morninggloria He’d pass them both up for Stacey Abrams without even blinking
3/3
2020
@robdelaney What’s the popular vote count?
3/1
2020
@jeremyscahill A majority and a plurality are not morally or intellectually equivalent. The superdelegate system is… https://t.co/roLzHk3xF3 @AkilahObviously I bet a good hacker could find out Jesus’ password security questions.
2/27
2020
@kayalbasi @mattyglesias Dumbledore’s still dead. @mattyglesias Dumbledore was constantly misinterpreted by his students and then sacrificed himself, leaving Snape,… https://t.co/D342Vgxmzk
2/20
2020
@rachsyme Mezzanine staircase at Studio 54
2/18
2020
WHERE IS THE #QUANTUMLEAP REBOOT?!?! Sam is just out there leaping and we need to know what he’s up to.
2/17
2020
@gidglick When did therapy become sharing Netflix queues?
2/15
2020
@benhewis A 35 year old feels weird about it.
2/13
2020
@FantasyFballNut I don’t know. [gets slimed]
2/12
2020
FEED ME, SEYMOUR! https://t.co/rxkM4F2rN8
2/1
2020
@rachsyme https://t.co/DSM7m8Nfkh
1/29
2020
@EvadLOL @iowanscott @Chris_Lee_Baker @LegacyZeroYT @BernieSanders The idea that the job of a teacher ends at 3pm e… https://t.co/LowUt0E5GT
1/26
2020
@kevdontkerr @GraceSpelman Did not realize it was this easy to become engaged to @GraceSpelman
1/19
2020
@realDonaldTrump THIS ONE SUPERFOOD DESTROYS BELLY FAT!!!!
1/16
2020
@ABFalecbaldwin No, thank you for asking.
1/6
2020
@rexparker @austinburns [quietly erases an answer in the top row and tries again]
1/3
2019
@CursedChildNYC Ice Spat, Lima. The name and location of the biggest pay-per-view event of the next decade.
12/31
2019
#starwars but it’s just a remake of Endgame with every celebrity who’s ever been a contestant on any reality show i… https://t.co/vBa5KHpsqQ
12/24
2019
@KenTremendous Ok there’s a smoking gun but where is the video of the gun actually being fired, along with a separa… https://t.co/av2hozOhOY
12/22
2019
Alan Alda in Marriage Story (2019) https://t.co/tJYtNq3hNi
12/21
2019
Does anybody have any thoughts on the new #starwars movie? Seems like nobody’s talking about it.
12/20
2019
@meganamram Omg. All star tweet.
12/19
2019
@WestWingWeekly @HrishiHirway @JoshMalina Can you guys ask somebody about that scene I vividly remember but isn’t a… https://t.co/LDhMhDegeV
12/18
2019
@rachsyme I love your Twitter, because you lead me to people and ideas that I wouldn’t discover otherwise. Thank you for that!
12/16
2019
@trisaratopsRAWR @hulu_support @wilsun_gooin The existence of children reminds me of climate change, so it’s offensive for that reason too.If journalism is the first draft of history, Twitter is the rough outline of history you throw together five minute… https://t.co/Gk5bhwK3ho
12/13
2019
@DavidPWebb Did you have anything else prepared?
12/10
2019
Losing @swholdren’s critical voice was sad, but @Helen_E_Shaw’s Jagged Little Pill review proves she’s a very worthy successor.
12/6
2019
@rachsyme Can I look as good as Chris Evans by buying the right sweater or do I need to also work outVery excited to add @rianjohnson’s “Knives Out” to my list of movies featuring Losing My Mind sung in a vehicle. (I… https://t.co/6Lnc9csgg0
12/2
2019
@wiki_tmnt Nope @jamesholod Does God, Thats Good count for this
11/30
2019
@meganamram Masterful
11/28
2019
@502eire @rexparker When people call center left democrats republicans, they mean a republican from the 70s-80s, wh… https://t.co/PPTHaa5xjO
11/16
2019
@nwalks Same but your cabaret video.
11/10
2019
@JuddApatow I would like to option this eBay auction.
11/9
2019
@parabasis I’m probably not following this closely enough to chime in, and I’m definitely not disagreeing with you,… https://t.co/VIvtKD4tAJ @parabasis Sounds like The Last Jedi to me.
11/6
2019
@GraceSpelman THEM: Do you want to go on an all day hike? ME: God no. THEM: Do you want to spend all day carefully… https://t.co/cCMeI9JT3h
11/2
2019
@rachsyme (Havent see Parasite yet, obviously) @rachsyme Into the Woods
10/30
2019
@ChrisCafero [long pause] I get it.
10/29
2019
I have seven followers, so where’s my promotional deal with a niche clothing line? #InfluencerMarketing @cenobitefg @DelReyBooks @Greg_Weisman @wizards_magic Maybe it’s where Nicole Richie’s child is buried? https://t.co/JojciYwX2B @Jachra @DelReyBooks @Greg_Weisman @wizards_magic Not if you believe in the definitions of words. @DelReyBooks @wizards_magic @Greg_Weisman I wish this were...better.
10/22
2019
@julieklausner But didn’t 70s finance guys love Sinatra? @AlShou16 @BernieSanders Literally nothing. @AlShou16 @BernieSanders It’s just the education of literally everyone in the country, and we want the people in th… https://t.co/sCjzZaG28K @yourdeal @jonwonderboy @BernieSanders It’s the easiest job in the world that most people quit in under five years… https://t.co/IXuBfxzpiE
10/21
2019
@patshighlights @BernieSanders Literally nobody said that. @AdamWijemanne @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Yep. Teaching is super easy. Literally anybody can do it. That’s why we al… https://t.co/DXnJnKjxql @Jaypop1201 @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders You could avoid hiring mediocre teachers in the first place if the jobs thems… https://t.co/yAweNMXMBn @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders It would be ok if fewer people went into law. Most people who go into law hate being lawyers. @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders It is absurd to say we want the best teachers, and then complain when the p… https://t.co/1aOT3aBdbI @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Teachers already need a graduate degree in most places. Beyond that, an app… https://t.co/aHvVYbYDko @StableGeniusRN @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders You should be paid more then. @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Also, $60k isn’t enough. Teachers should be paid like doctors and lawyers, or else when w… https://t.co/rMQUOxhND9 @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders When you pay teachers more, you get more competition for the jobs, and you end up with mo… https://t.co/j7pEKDjUct
10/20
2019
@parabasis It’s a metaphor. It tracks.
10/16
2019
@mcterzakis @emilyyoshida So it hit #36 on the billboard hot 100 when Sinatra recorded it so this one actually seems vaguely plausible. 🤷‍♂️
10/14
2019
@parabasis @heybonanos I, for one, can’t wait for The Great Gatsby 2D platformer to release for the Switch.
10/13
2019

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