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Just a shark, shouting into the void, heard by only the winds. And some weird bots.

181 Following   6 Followers   192 Tweets

Joined Twitter 9/17/11


@rachsyme Can I look as good as Chris Evans by buying the right sweater or do I need to also work outVery excited to add @rianjohnson’s “Knives Out” to my list of movies featuring Losing My Mind sung in a vehicle. (I… https://t.co/6Lnc9csgg0
12/2
2019
@wiki_tmnt Nope @jamesholod Does God, Thats Good count for this
11/30
2019
@meganamram Masterful
11/28
2019
@502eire @rexparker When people call center left democrats republicans, they mean a republican from the 70s-80s, wh… https://t.co/PPTHaa5xjO
11/16
2019
@nwalks Same but your cabaret video.
11/10
2019
@JuddApatow I would like to option this eBay auction.
11/9
2019
@parabasis I’m probably not following this closely enough to chime in, and I’m definitely not disagreeing with you,… https://t.co/VIvtKD4tAJ @parabasis Sounds like The Last Jedi to me.
11/6
2019
@GraceSpelman THEM: Do you want to go on an all day hike? ME: God no. THEM: Do you want to spend all day carefully… https://t.co/cCMeI9JT3h
11/2
2019
@rachsyme (Havent see Parasite yet, obviously) @rachsyme Into the Woods
10/30
2019
@ChrisCafero [long pause] I get it.
10/29
2019
I have seven followers, so where’s my promotional deal with a niche clothing line? #InfluencerMarketing @cenobitefg @DelReyBooks @Greg_Weisman @wizards_magic Maybe it’s where Nicole Richie’s child is buried? https://t.co/JojciYwX2B @Jachra @DelReyBooks @Greg_Weisman @wizards_magic Not if you believe in the definitions of words. @DelReyBooks @wizards_magic @Greg_Weisman I wish this were...better.
10/22
2019
@julieklausner But didn’t 70s finance guys love Sinatra? @AlShou16 @BernieSanders Literally nothing. @AlShou16 @BernieSanders It’s just the education of literally everyone in the country, and we want the people in th… https://t.co/sCjzZaG28K @yourdeal @jonwonderboy @BernieSanders It’s the easiest job in the world that most people quit in under five years… https://t.co/IXuBfxzpiE
10/21
2019
@patshighlights @BernieSanders Literally nobody said that. @AdamWijemanne @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Yep. Teaching is super easy. Literally anybody can do it. That’s why we al… https://t.co/DXnJnKjxql @Jaypop1201 @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders You could avoid hiring mediocre teachers in the first place if the jobs thems… https://t.co/yAweNMXMBn @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders It would be ok if fewer people went into law. Most people who go into law hate being lawyers. @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders It is absurd to say we want the best teachers, and then complain when the p… https://t.co/1aOT3aBdbI @jonwonderboy @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Teachers already need a graduate degree in most places. Beyond that, an app… https://t.co/aHvVYbYDko @StableGeniusRN @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders You should be paid more then. @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders Also, $60k isn’t enough. Teachers should be paid like doctors and lawyers, or else when w… https://t.co/rMQUOxhND9 @Fynn_Fish @BernieSanders When you pay teachers more, you get more competition for the jobs, and you end up with mo… https://t.co/j7pEKDjUct
10/20
2019
@parabasis It’s a metaphor. It tracks.
10/16
2019
@mcterzakis @emilyyoshida So it hit #36 on the billboard hot 100 when Sinatra recorded it so this one actually seems vaguely plausible. 🤷‍♂️
10/14
2019
@parabasis @heybonanos I, for one, can’t wait for The Great Gatsby 2D platformer to release for the Switch. @parabasis Will high frame rate filmmaking, if it catches on, necessitate an evolution in acting style to accommoda… https://t.co/SsolNuwPxF
10/13
2019
@thetoddberger It’s crazy that we’re all just noticing this now (thanks for pointing this out!!), especially consid… https://t.co/3LI2Vb7FyJ
10/11
2019
@mtishows @MrJasonRBrown @rhorn1 Meryl Streep, James Spader, Katrina Lenk, Raul Esparza @nprscottsimon What would he say to a fan who 100% believes that we will never see the publication of another book… https://t.co/NRT5nCfK3i
10/9
2019
@pblindauer Not “Merry Pippins”?Everybody’s gushing over @Lin_Manuel at @freestylelove, but nobody’s mentioning that at the Saturday late show the… https://t.co/iFa35Ic87I
10/2
2019
@ohJuliatweets Ugh, The North Branch Inn. Twitter needs an edit button blah blah blah. But yeah. North Branch. @ohJuliatweets You want the Long Branch Inn @TheLivingMJ Justice for “The Blue Flower”
10/1
2019
@parabasis Went to a movie tonight with plans to watch the ep tomorrow and genuinely spent time on theater news sit… https://t.co/M98tASVST1
9/30
2019
@MattZeitlin Scrubs is sad more often than Friends or the Office.
9/27
2019
@parabasis Omg would invest. I would cast Kermit, Piggy and @zoeinthecities and Paul Dano though.
9/19
2019
@swholdren @NYMag @vulture Your criticism is so good that it helps me process my own reactions to a show. The clari… https://t.co/CALSX5gkBg @rshields37 @nytimes Except I live in NYC and they were somehow unable to deliver most of it this weekend. I even g… https://t.co/WPnXHXiQwU
9/16
2019
@Lin_Manuel Stale rice cake.
9/7
2019
@zoeinthecities One of my favorite plays of that whole season!!
9/6
2019
@alicewetterlund Literally LOLd at your special tonight. Thank you!The #Christmas episode of @GlowNetflix is a strong argument against the @netflix all-at-once season release strateg… https://t.co/OTKv4kXVFv
9/4
2019
@MichaelGalanin @pblindauer But where’s the part where you deep fry it and turn it into a pepperoni pizza?
8/26
2019
@_RobynEdgar @Zipcar Are you still waiting? @_RobynEdgar @Zipcar I’m an hour and a half from home, I stopped to get gas, and now the car won’t turn back on and… https://t.co/JNYFdFcXKA @_RobynEdgar @Zipcar Not encouraging to see that so many people are having trouble reaching you today @Zipcar!! How… https://t.co/HTILorVH1E @Zipcar I pulled off the highway to get gas and now the car won’t turn back on. Nobody is picking up the phone on y… https://t.co/LGb3Q3u8ER
8/24
2019
@parabasis Your book cannot come soon enough. Your Twitter is like a constant sneak preview and I can’t get enough.
8/18
2019
@jonnysun PLUS in 17 years we can get a nostalgic reboot!!
6/8
2019
I mean, we all know he means “landing on the moon is a necessary step in a journey to mars due to the various engin… https://t.co/HlQW4xQmH4
6/7
2019
@rogerjva @AlanaMassey It does sound like the right prequel to this movie though: https://t.co/KMoyY3DabV @rogerjva @AlanaMassey There would be so much crying in dark, rainy scenes in this movie. @AlanaMassey A tragedy in which Michael Fassbender obsessively copes with the loss of his wife by implanting milita… https://t.co/SecG98ltBb
6/4
2019
@TheAuntifa Uhh, Wife Wife.
5/27
2019
@parabasis Fair. That’s not my beef. I thought all the plot beats worked. If you outline the plot you can say, yeah… https://t.co/AuZeqg50qo @parabasis It’s the How I Met Your Mother Problem. You have an ending in mind and you ignore the show you actually… https://t.co/iNNRO8nSjm @parabasis Martin, if he does finish, will have taken two additional thousand page books to get to there. It’s not… https://t.co/u73Dlfw1BW
5/20
2019
@daveweigel Be impenetrable with an understanding that it’s somehow sexy but you’re not smart enough to figure out how?
5/18
2019
@rachsyme May I steer you toward the @arsnova SuperNova program...
5/3
2019
@ayoedebiri Where/when is the meetup for this group.
4/30
2019
@nathanielrohan @davidehrlich @daveweigel Then the discussion is considerably more nuanced than “Disney is bad for owning everything.” @nathanielrohan @davidehrlich @daveweigel Ok, fair enough. Still, if you think Endgame is better than Avatar, and y… https://t.co/oUa5om0ogC @nathanielrohan @davidehrlich @daveweigel I’m not sure noting the news of the movie’s profitability, or even being… https://t.co/5Fdr9h8jVX @davidehrlich The sentiment in this tweet is not at all the same thing as what you originally said. @davidehrlich @daveweigel It’s ok to just...really enjoy a movie?
4/28
2019
@swholdren is right on Beetlejuice, right on Tootsie, right for America. Throwing my considerable no-follower spamb… https://t.co/U3JC8fEieZ
4/26
2019
@mattyglesias The problem isn’t Bernie, who is evidently fine, it’s his army of fans that has managed to convince t… https://t.co/J3etyIpGp6
4/24
2019
@rexparker Bank of America’s is ERICA so I think there’s a pretty amazing theme a-brewing! @HackettKate @Joshstrangehill @DanaSchwartzzz ...Old Devil Moon thoigh? @Miss_Jess03 @MollyPBearman @2019Jefery @JamesGelberg @DanaSchwartzzz Written by the original authors at least! @MollyPBearman @2019Jefery @Miss_Jess03 @JamesGelberg @DanaSchwartzzz Kind of cheating since it wasn’t part of the… https://t.co/Ps2m2EoXda
4/23
2019
@petermarksdrama So he’s getting credit for...his lawyers drafting a good contract for him 30 years ago?
4/21
2019
@swholdren @parabasis Now that I’ve seen the show I feel like I need to report that this was an impressively perfect recap.
4/19
2019
@swholdren @parabasis I have never felt more prepared to see anything. @parabasis On my way to see it right now. I don’t really remember what happens in the Shakespeare play though. Is t… https://t.co/9kX0MCykjz
4/18
2019
@rachsyme I’m just a shark with no followers but this song is all I’ve wanted to talk about for weeks and I’m glad… https://t.co/5fOe6RXb2L
4/14
2019
@rachsyme The last two songs of Act I together are some of the best theater I have ever, ever seen.What matters about #starwars #riseofskywalker isn’t whether they retcon Rey’s parentage, or who makes a surprise re… https://t.co/7LNjOyijIL
4/13
2019
@parabasis How is this not a reality show?
4/7
2019
@feeltheheath People who are on heroin
3/13
2019
@jayasax I once saw Richard Kind getting off the subway at 79th St carrying a giant stuffed panda. This is 100% true.
3/1
2019
@swholdren I am unashamed that I loved this show, and I believe critics should be fully honest when they don’t like… https://t.co/QgriN25V9c @nwalks Saw Nassim tonight bc you tweeted about it and it is a crime that there were any empty seats in that theate… https://t.co/kGjp0fTGTu
2/27
2019
@nwalks One of the things I admire about you is that you always seem to be existing in a state of high drama that I… https://t.co/q1x1Muo8Y8
2/9
2019
The @Skittles musical was good. My favorite part was Winston Churchill.
2/3
2019
@fheaney @fleetwoodwack @AVCXWord RealIzing that the first two across answers in each of this week’s… https://t.co/pl1hZ22fQM
1/30
2019
@rexparker The Guardian has a weekly news magazine edition that has a cryptic in it.
1/29
2019
@petermarksdrama Also “six months ago” destroys the assonance of “reason/three/year” and sounds notably clunkier as a result.Why is the opening scene prerecorded? #rent
1/28
2019
Alexi Darling got laid off from BuzzFeed yesterday. :( #rentlive
1/27
2019

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