Sign in with Twitter

Username:

( )

9,943 Following   124,288 Followers   41,206 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/5/10


This is great https://t.co/vZOO6oy1vG @Lukeribs @theJeremyVine I’m on itI have decided as of Monday to change my Twitter handle to @hilariousmillionairecomedygenius In case you need to tweet me. @DawnHFoster Back to Saturday Superstore isn’t it? “What’s your favourite colour?” “Which pop star do you have a cr… https://t.co/tbjvd7ulxPthe room next door - Prince Andrew SHORT VERSION https://t.co/yruQYMuWQJ
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny
11/20
2019
This weekend has been amazing. Almost 30,000 of you registered over the weekend, including 20,000 in one day - a… https://t.co/UothZb5EH2
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @MikeBond64 you'll miss me when i'm gone @SpillerOfTea It looks like a lovely fascinator. Is he off to a wedding?Enjoying @ChrisHawkinsUK on @BBCRadio4 on Very Loud Science
11/19
2019
@PaulKeaveny HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOR TOMORROW OUR KID (Is that what it's come to....a happy birthday on a social media forum?) @PaulKeaveny That is, and isn't, a load of bollocks isn't it? Or is it? #MMMMJAFFACAKESSomebody call Alanis..Marie should just do an online store that specialises in skips: https://t.co/W4oRmcAL6CI like it. I don’t get it, but I like it: https://t.co/Q8FCGqjhYuMan drops dead in Job Centre queue after being declared fit to work https://t.co/YaVObwxUlQ
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @almurray “Got it today, what a day, thanks a million!” Where do I collect?I think people who drink desert wine are MAD cos alcohol is so dehydrating. @matteveritt @GlastoFest Been out the game too long @matteveritt @GlastoFest Doesn’t matter how long we spend apart, we end up making the same shit gags.AMAZING!! You’re playing the philemmachuck festival????????? https://t.co/1AqWp94OZyNational treasure. Up there with the Matt Baker “how do you sleep at night?” question to Cameron: https://t.co/oB7RKaKt9n @devlin_jp I’ll be honest I thought trousers were leg t shirts till I saw those kittens - I’ll sell you two from th… https://t.co/nMoDwQagGy
11/18
2019
Amazing to see @billybragg at @Leadmill last night. Would be good to pick up the conversation about how musicians c… https://t.co/Z9sc5qdxwr
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny1st December #ChristmasWithoutTears @HyattChurchill with @theharryshearer @judithowen @HarryEnfield6 @GrumpyOldRickhttps://t.co/2tkCGfuiIS
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @devlin_jp Dough balls #nosweating
11/17
2019
😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 https://t.co/j1ryyRKW9v“How would you break in to the most heavily guarded country on earth?” The extraordinary true story of a man who d… https://t.co/3M8MVYNqQ4
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @mrjamesob I’ve been stuck with 15 grand’s worth of Sarah Ferguson’s since 2001
11/16
2019
@richardosman ? https://t.co/fqxqbRMi5E @dawnshaped CATCH YERSELF AWN LIZ!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂one of the great joys of this paternity leave was watching 1994 eps of Corrie on Quest TV a… https://t.co/3cDBe7j6GKSign up to https://t.co/iXtay9zLNy while you’re in the process of fucking off for all time. Thank you. https://t.co/es2s47gfuM
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @TobyonTV I must admit I love the way he attacks the word “CAFE-TEE-ERE!!” @TobyonTV This alone should make him unelectable. Hot caffeinated drinks are not permissible at a barbecue where on… https://t.co/ysjaXNd9BP @browniemaker69 What WhatsApp? I am paranoid.👀 https://t.co/mGQZOfjrObHurry up and get old enough to be in my band ffs! Or can I please join yours? Legend https://t.co/3eMcTgtRCj
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @lucymadge @r_byrne @MasterChefUK Oh god I’m so gullible! Apparently they’ve taken the word out of the dictionary etc @r_byrne @MasterChefUK This is almost as exciting as the baby! @gregjmchugh Tell me more about the jacket Greg I like the cut of your jibIn sports news, a golfer has had his balls interfered with on a green for the first time since Tiger Woods back in… https://t.co/9wxJg8n52hMy nephew Finley has blood cancer: and you can help him and other people like him. @DKMS_uk https://t.co/V4UCu95ySq
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @r_byrne @MasterChefUK Wait...you’re on MASTERCHEF?????
11/15
2019
Just sad that my trainers are now not as clean as this https://t.co/s75U7jjbcx @SELFESTEEM___ I’m still desperately trying to bang out a saccharine piece of sub-Sheeran bullshit on the piano tha… https://t.co/SgLUtkuVHO @SELFESTEEM___ Climb out of the barhroom window and run for your life @BBCRadio4 He thinks I’m a prickHey everyone. Get to it, no reason why not: @DKMS_uk need you to register as a donor to help fight blood cancer. Pl… https://t.co/hocCPpYuvF
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny😂😂😂😂😂 https://t.co/0cRc8pomCtI’m beginning to think the only way we could get rid of Trump would be a secret tape in which he says he “don’t lik… https://t.co/YQAQCtOGUANBC: Impeachment ABC: Impeachment CNN: Impeachment FOX: https://t.co/rgyAlToXY8
Retweeted by Shaun KeavenyTrump hasn’t time to: watch the impeachment trial. Has time to: golf weekly at Mar-a-Lago / tease his hair into a c… https://t.co/KXgAM0KcU3 @jetfury Because you’re a beautiful young woman looking for financial security?😂😂😂😂 https://t.co/2xgfdtYFWh @higginsmark I prefer the Fromonday session when Ada does the balls
11/14
2019
@IsabelHardman @EmmaKennedy Yes, and in a bit a huge elephant trailed by John Noakes is going to piss all over the studio floorMy New Jam is (Im)Peaches by Presidents of the United States Of America. I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE POLICE GUY PUT HIS… https://t.co/Bi3lamGkbZGet your ears around the @GeorgeThePoet podcast on @BBCSounds its brilliant stuffThe contempt these idiots hold us in is almost hilarious. “I’ve got my..(SUSTAINABLE) coffee cup with me..do I get… https://t.co/balA691DWI @cat_willis I’ve got Male 2 written all over meA man who can’t get a Thai curry past the bobby at 10 Downing Street is asking us to trust him to solve the Irish b… https://t.co/2ln0Ln9uaX
11/13
2019
@Baddiel Someone’s going to slip their tackle in the box in a minute @ith72 @richardosman @rachelparris @thatjanravens @Jay_n_Co The camera adds ten pounds but, in the words of Chandler, how many cameras??! @shaunwkeaveny It's also nearly Christmas. Time to get the drinks in. https://t.co/9WV2UhAnMU
Retweeted by Shaun KeavenyTOTALLY BRILLIANT: https://t.co/SvcFai4uyZ
11/12
2019
@Stuart_of_skelf @mark_jetson2005 @theJeremyVine Pontius Pilates @folkyvale Thank you for noticing that. Pure @RealBobMortimer thatOne of my favourite Beatles songs that is incidentally about when John Lennon got a bike puncture repaired, PSI Love youOh yes. I’m on the telly all this week on @richardosman House of Games on BBC 2 at 6, with @rachelparris @thatjanravens and @Jay_n_Co 👀World gone mad 447: Roman Catholics on @theJeremyVine saying it’s about time Christians fought back against the tyr… https://t.co/QNc0iXnBzsWorld’s most disingenuous phrases number 33: “your call is important to us”. #mostdisingenuousphrasesWorld gone mad. Hearing Nick Robinson badgering Emily Thornberry, “WOULD Jeremy Corbyn use nuclear weapons?!” Come… https://t.co/c6Uejs7Eyc @JREdlinBenwell @HEYDUGGEE I’m not coming back
11/11
2019
1st December @HyattChurchill #ChristmasWithoutTears with @theharryshearer @judithowen @GrumpyOldRick @shaunwkeavenyhttps://t.co/WvJ7s8dTHV
Retweeted by Shaun KeavenyCouple of new insults for you, “pisswand” and “dog’s lipstick”. I’ll try and squeeze a couple more out later.Why has no-one knocked the single use coffee cup out of his hand? THINK OF THE OPTICS!! https://t.co/T3IJhWZM1IHe’s as reassuring as a lean-to in typhoon, this lad: https://t.co/SgVrc7KvuNCock Piss Hancock. https://t.co/SgVrc7KvuNNice tweet https://t.co/NCRBD0449D @maryannehobbs @jehnbeth @SwingTing @BBC6Music Gorgeous!Good tour van convo: -“your closest Derek?” (Talk about the person named Derek you are closest to in life -“dad c… https://t.co/Tvk5JTTyjM
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny11000 scientists signed a declaration of climate emergency. Its great that it gets media attention. But it's not li… https://t.co/2cDrse0DR3
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny😂😂😂😂 it’s like an ad for Preparation H: https://t.co/7qfeVWCXTh
11/8
2019
Sounds so good! https://t.co/2OfiS2D1ul @gregjmchugh 😂😂😂😂 @MrDanielPrior And to you! Tired dad hangout necessary soonparty-political on yo-ass but I do want to reiterate how massively precious the NHS is to us all (i know you know t… https://t.co/BT9Hqu0tGUat Queen Charlotte Hospital Hammersmith. It genuinely makes us emotional to think back to the kindness, expertise,… https://t.co/bFAYX9fGMsHELLO. Day 8 of Pat Leave and day 6 with our gorgeous new bundle. Thanks for your messages of loveliness. I wouldn'… https://t.co/77hCwnio0jI mean it was actually in Solihull but hey these are mere details. https://t.co/B80Vm8Uwm1
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny
11/7
2019
This looks hugely awesome: https://t.co/KIz5tNv5fb @higginsmark It’s being prorogued in the next parliamentLoved that hour. Especially Steve “Gadd” Lamacq at the end!! https://t.co/iEPCRyYkMvWow!! https://t.co/jKK1xLHDzcJames Cleverley...I’m sorry it still gets me...If you are a @foofighters fan and want to listen to @steve_lamacq talking drums with #TaylorHawkins then tune into… https://t.co/ZAzuq8FaET
Retweeted by Shaun Keaveny @MrMichaelSpicer @JamesCleverly I can’t wait for this one @alburnard My mate fell into a huge vat of fusilli at an Italian food factory. He died of INPASTA SYNDROME. I have had 2 hours sleep.Is that the “disillusion” of parliament?
11/6
2019
The #tunnel29 podcast on @BBCSounds is superb. End lesson: wherever there’s a wall, people will try to get over it,… https://t.co/NzahVDLrrL
11/5
2019
@oscjerome @BBC6Music @tom_ravenscroft Please expect a long and heartfelt tribute to the NHS in the near future but… https://t.co/TX4gpVJfa1
11/4
2019

0