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Ben Boyer @sleezsisters San Diego, CA

𝓢𝓪𝓷 𝓓𝓲𝓮𝓰𝓸 / Universal Healthcare / Nachos / Candy / The dustier corners of the video store / Breakfast burritos / Souvenirs, Novelties, Party Tricks

1,228 Following   5,101 Followers   38,584 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/21/09

@hbecerraLATimes I’ve always thought he looks like Wee Man from “Jackass”!? @timheidecker That ball met its Bell-end
Sending good vibes to all my Los Angeles baseball loving friends today⚾️ multi-billionaire at 28 and already a complete failure as a human being. Just the shittiest, most awful pig people more than ever✌️ to remember my parents’ HBO login like
Retweeted by Ben Boyer @thechrisbarron Still slaps @SWAtlasHoover All evidnc suggsts u r a stup’d dldo; plz considr eatng my bllz @JeffNale It is 100% melodrama that occasionally feels like it’s from a different planet, but the writing is great…
@WesternGhost I saw Jake Fogelnest tweet that it’s been pushed to 2021, and he would probably have insider info I g…⚡️❤️Happy 40th, Times Square❤️⚡️ it stoing How it’s garted , ,. @jessicacblank @JoshCrewsReally (Also that’s way better than mine! That was at AU, right? I saw Helmet there and a… @jessicacblank @JoshCrewsReally Yeah that’s a time-machine-worthy show I think. Amazing @beautypill Goddamn it all I remember that infuriating me then. “Vaguely hints at a discourse on race relations”! V… out another nice chair this morning ☹️ wanted to circle back around and kindly ask my currently boning neighbors to once again please stop doing thatI’d never seen this, because in my dumb mind it was always the ultimate grown-ups movie, but I realized I couldn’t… thought I had accidentally rented the adult version of Terms of Endearment but it turns out that’s just how they… @JeffNale @CruzKayne It’s so nuts, Radiohead spent such a long time as an opening band even way after “Creep” broke… @jsnod Incredible @CruzKayne Caught that same Screaming Trees/Soul Asylum tour at Merriweather Post Pavilion on (according to… @JoshCrewsReally @danselzer @MrLukeJenner I feel like when I was in NYC there was *so little* Mexican food having come from several… @JoshCrewsReally I mean I went to almost all the Lollapaloozas but my real answer here is that I had a friend who w… @danselzer Believe it or not, there is a good chunk devoted to the role of yellow cheese in Mexican food in the exc… when nobody was looking Kurt Loder turned into John Cage.
Retweeted by Ben BoyerGreat news! I act in @LuckyMcKee’s horror-western short “They Once Had Horses” that is one of the doors to hell in…
Retweeted by Ben BoyerBlessed be the tacos
@LuckyMcKee 😘 🥦💂‍♂️ 🧽 @lightintheattic Just throwing it out there that Comfort Colors makes very nice 3x/4x sizes if you ever want to pri…
Retweeted by Ben Boyer @sexyfacts4u Sadly the movies switched today and we lost Wolf of Snow Hollow, which I’m bummed about - it looked aw… @DanMac4 Got shot down. “It’s not you, it’s me,” apparently. Every time.We have been getting crazy misty morning fog rolling through the last week it, I should know this. Abe Vigoda? Wait, no... ALF?! @AvonFoerster D as in Bobby D? D as in Bobby D’s D?! There’s got to be a good story here....I might be at the drive-in all alone tonight, to see Brandon Cronenberg’s POSSESSOR, but - please: If this car’s a… @1000TimesJeff Can’t wrap my head around it at all @1000TimesJeff It never would have even dawned on me that people would want a mix of stuff they already know! @LydiaBurrell Cuteservitude
@HLeithauser I exclusively just listen to “Get in the Ring” over and over againI want to thank the guys from the ‘Interviews with Dipshit Losers’ podcast for having me on as a guest - I admit th…🎵 Even saw the lights of the Goodyear Blimp / And it read “Shoutout to Ice Cube for his willingness to step up and… @will_berson I mean @onapedalstool I’m counting on the 20-somethings, really.Lots of people are like “once the old guard goes we can make some actual progress” but the old guard are simply ric…“In September 2020, after the death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, there was widespread concern among Democratic senators… @phil0bed0 @Super70sSports Hahahahaha incredibleBonus Voting Gift Baggie Contents: 1) Q-tip (“discarded”) 2) “I Voted” sticker. 3) Pair of Anti-Septic Towelett…
Retweeted by Ben Boyer @neurasthenya @USPS @BOENYC Jesus Christ @ryguyguyry @Pornhub This absolutely was one of the funniest bits ever; thanks for a ton of laughsSome “Facebook memories” that pop up are emotional minefields that will color the way my whole day plays out; other… @alex_sammon Now I keep getting this one served to me - they are hitting every possible emotional beat with these t… @ebrodeur @beautypill Eric can you do me a favor and find my Mom, I'll just be sitting here again waiting for her @krankpress @beautypill Wow! Davis was the one by Walter Johnson, right? I went there a few times, as well as the o… @beautypill When I was a kid they used to show Saturday movies at Little Falls Library in Bethesda; real 16mm print… @volarrecords @1000TimesJeff @ghostly @marylattimore I was at that one too, it felt refreshing to have such a wild… @1000TimesJeff @ghostly @marylattimore It’s wild, it really looks like little molten blobs of silver in thereVulture hitches ride on selfie stick
Retweeted by Ben Boyer
@rusticus_est @will_berson His claim today is “we can’t afford not to negotiate with whoever is in power or our con… @will_berson No joke, Tommy Pham from the Padres got stabbed day before yesterday at a strip club a mile from my ho… @neurasthenya I mean, if it can’t be my Padres it’s got to be Los Doyers! @will_berson Today’s revelation that Ice Cube is “working with” the Trump administration on some vague policy points🍁I think I’m supposed to feel angry SoCal rivalry towards the Dodgers but I want them to win the whole thing🍁 @rob__mccallum I assume you’ve gotten this a bunch already but the Cheers pilot is the best sitcom pilot everWatching people we have always taken to be teachers and leaders get brutally duped (especially when failing to foll… had never seen this before. Some wild alternate-universe versions of this movie out there. None of which feature… around taking glamor shots of my new @marylattimore record. If you are interested in beauty, transcendence,… @GillCraigie Yep! They look like this @mrjohnnyandrews Hahaha niiiiiiiice🐕🍝🐩 the afternoon listening to her mom’s very well preserved collection of O.G. read along storybooks pro move by Starz swooping in on this one
I cried laughing at this 🎞 @The_Shiznit @LukeWhiston That’s actually a small culture of Covid-14, one of the mellower Covids that didn’t really make the news @NGiles19 They’re around here somewhere! @The_Shiznit I really want to believe it didn’t come from my body. The most likely guess is some kind of Slurpee or… find wedged very deep under the passenger seat of my car. Also if this was like 1996 this would be a pretty g… @MattHelgeson They turned down flu shots?! Jesus Christ. I took my daughter to a CVS minute clinic that they told m… @heyhietpas I mean, PG Boobs was the holy grail at the time; kids would whisper about these unicorn titles (Sixteen… @ADawsonBros Have you ever seen this, from the transcripts of the recordings of the Raiders script meetings?! I mea… Poltergeist for the first time in many years. Still scary. *Ludicrous* this is PG Something I never clock… @rachelpeters No one is more judgmental than a cat!! @MattHelgeson Oh man..... @rachelpeters I save one last broccoli to cover my sins @krrmcc @blainecapatch The best!It’s all about daddy’s healthy stir fry tonight! (Cut to 4 hours from now after the kid’s asleep and I’m chugging m… @blainecapatch Goddamnit all
You guys would not believe the roller coaster of emotions I’ve been through
Retweeted by Ben Boyer @theryanbradford Agreed 100%. Though this one is the track that’s making me look dramatically out windows @lightintheattic This... is actually kind of dope @balangelo @gabeliedman Over a montage of Catherine Oxenberg making ceviche @NightPromoting STEREO VHS & BETA @neurasthenya I can’t stop singing “Clown Car Vagina” to the tune of “We are the Robots” @thecaribbean I saw that opening night at the UptownKeith Raniere has gone full Frank T.J. Mackey on tonight’s episode of The Vow, here’s the Monster Mash sang to the tune of the theme to M*A*S*H
Retweeted by Ben Boyer @VicBergerIV God almighty, imagine having to work in an office next to this boba-brained headcase, stinking up all the cubicles with his hat