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Front-end engineer, working on design systems at @stripe — onions are my own — gpg fingerprint 9D44 FE16 DDD6 80BC 06AD E471 13CE 42FD 3C33 F935

850 Following   31,646 Followers   22,019 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/28/08


@billlabus not stripe’s chosen benefit partners thoYear 3187: The last 2 remaining sentient earth-based Roomba Xs Max Pros stumble upon a novel solution to the longes… https://t.co/bhzK6OmB45
2/17
2020
@cattron313 ipad 1 @robcolburn In mighty pups she can control the weather. @nicodegols I didn’t say gum? Also it still is intentionally misleading. @nicodegols That’s not what honest means @jonloyens This is kinda what i meant. I’m never afraid they can’t solve a problem because … ah yep… call in the one that flies.
2/16
2020
@harper what’s the likelihood that this turns out to be offensive in 2075 when you’re running for intergalactic cou… https://t.co/L3UbDhSiJv @umanagineer haha yea, that one was short-lived*any parent chewing candy* child within 1 mile: “what are you eating?” parent: “medicine.” @jtaby @RogueAmoeba But if you found that this worked, I don’t think it’d be overkill to add a a hardware modificat… https://t.co/cWIJkWsksp @jtaby @RogueAmoeba sonarworks true-fi might be enough for you and is a available on ios and os x @jtaby @RogueAmoeba There are expensive systems that listen to frequencies swept in your room and then reverse EQ,… https://t.co/wFXn6Axx7M @jtaby @RogueAmoeba i would look more towards “mastering” guides vs “mixing” guides, fwiw. I think it’s pretty clos… https://t.co/6fWvyt0BygUnpopular opinion: Skye is overpowered compared to the other pups. @MylesBorins miss u already @MylesBorins https://t.co/ezG6gkDdmB @chexee Within a span of ~20min no less @kpk how dare u ask this @dotpem smart. concentrate all of the critical information that no one will read into a single document. @dotpem the poor people who choose pretzels @_jayphelps i see u also know the “sorry about the stroopwafel confusion” face @lynchy010 Ah yea, im sure that totally would have helped the situation @avibryant “Oh… no… not this one.” Attendant shows her the butter cookie package. “This?” “Yessss”For all the haters in the comments saying that this was fake, u know i got receipts. https://t.co/2kFRKwXVQpWhen presented with the drink cart, and the question “would you like anything to drink?,” the person behind me resp… https://t.co/boLLg8kPHeShe eventually just went with “a dutch cookie” but several people chose that option and then returned it upon recei… https://t.co/y6jXQvH5dVThe attendant on my flight is (rightly) frustrated because she had to explain to each individual row what a stroopw… https://t.co/ylLZElQ3TK @phyllis_molino @warybear @thesarahkelly @drewmagary We’re *both* dead. @benschwarz @dgoodlad @stripe how dare u i worked hard on that
2/15
2020
@ylukem @ch_ylukem ok @ch_ylukem Can confirm
2/13
2020
@Mandy_Kerr @TarynMusgrave https://t.co/p72OAwiIJq I'm not smart enough to merge my jsconfhi event with yours on t… https://t.co/g11vkRVdQW @TarynMusgrave @Mandy_Kerr Slides might be disappointing without words but I’ll get ‘em up.
2/12
2020
@skamille @pdxmele @alicegoldfuss @EricaJoy they don’t verify the babies, so you can just wait for the next president you like @solomania @FeifanZ @elonmusk @Teslarati @Tesla @TeslaMotorsClub @teslaownersSV @Model3Owners @TeslaNY All the new… https://t.co/O2KapdRnPR @rich0H I would enjoy that @rich0H Tomorrow! @rich0H Came back to be in the SF Matrix 4 scenes? Were you in Sydney for the first three?
2/11
2020
@jtaby @philletourneau A little bassier than both the sonos and the hd3s fwiw https://t.co/isOnhT4zGG @jtaby @philletourneau AE5 == acoustic energy? https://t.co/QlSvhHQjzS @jtaby @philletourneau Pairing a sonos sub is a good (decent down to ~40hz), but expensive way to easily make the s… https://t.co/Lnlx8JnVuv @jtaby @philletourneau Here’s thr sonos 1 for comparison. https://t.co/XyxPzXhAEX @jtaby @philletourneau Depends on how much you like bass. HD3s will sound as good/better than a pair of sonos 1, bu… https://t.co/LkCbgic457 @marcosc @auchenberg We know the lower bound of absolute deaths though, and the rate of increase of those deaths, a… https://t.co/ZiK67DvqSf @marcosc @auchenberg The flu numbers are for an entire flu season. The ncov numbers are for like 3 weeks. It’s cert… https://t.co/sssj9nufJd @marcosc @auchenberg But we’re ignoring the rate of spread and the death rate? I don’t understand how those numbers “hold”. @marcosc @auchenberg You didn’t read the article? 🤷🏼‍♂️
2/10
2020
@cattron313 Tuesday @cattron313 I’m in
2/9
2020
@jarredsumner Sorry bud @jarredsumner all these sync methods are gonna bite u dawg, they’re fast until they jank your app.
2/8
2020
@alexschaaf OpenType fonts have a concept of “proportional numbers” and “tabular numbers” (pnum vs tnum). It determ… https://t.co/q2iSvYfwng @JennaQuindica this is accurate @poindexter_json @JSConfHi cc @koop @danwrong uk engineers too 😉 @ch_ylukem Club quarters? Business travel??
2/7
2020
@gf3 Fake beard? @padolsey if you don’t actively gain followers on twitter, you slowly leak bots/deleted accounts. Not implying zero… https://t.co/V6BJqmqXx5
2/6
2020
@dshaw @meyerwork Clear is for the line *before* TSA only @dshaw Clear is not a replacement for TSA precheck. If you get Clear w/out precheck, they put you in the “take shoe… https://t.co/ItOGcdjuFh @padolsey haha, i tried a few, felt wrong, lol, so yes, wyaa too mchuch @padolsey welcome to weird twitter, james, next is intentional misspellings
2/5
2020
@worm_emoji rude
2/4
2020
@maddievision splice the wires imvho i bet there are guides
2/3
2020
@isaach This happens with video for me. Even built in webcam is invisible. `sudo killall VDCAssistant` fixes it. Wo… https://t.co/raYMgKNoN7
2/2
2020
@padolsey they need a “tamp dampener” (not a thing but fun to say) (the blenders get me, personally) @mikeal Patrick J Adams and Gabriel Macht (tru no looker) @padolsey https://t.co/VfLTQOHgBz
1/31
2020
@ericlaw Accidentally got caught with a box cutter* in my bag at SFO… on my way home. (*I had recently brought it to the office) @sebmck welcome, enjoy the restrooms @alunny @asolove Are you trying to tell me someone said “snack my bitch up” already?? @asolove the best thing to do when you think of a "2 x 2 y" joke is to search twitter for how many people already m… https://t.co/xW1c63DNx9 @samreich who was the dp on this @jedschmidt @jaffathecake @JamesCoyle95 I like this!Rough week for @Lin_Manuel. https://t.co/rCkWlnSYUx
Retweeted by Alex Sexton @wesbos @stolinski Briann* @willmanduffy i have great news about paper towels and water
1/29
2020
@suchipi Garlic salt Dark Mode™️ @rmurphey I have so much garlic salt, it’s slowly driving me mad.https://t.co/D24sHZdfI6 https://t.co/LfH0yDW02Bhttps://t.co/xpCQbkvczi https://t.co/FXfnCupCc7For more tweets from me about garlic/garlic salt: https://t.co/GLKyfvll9J https://t.co/rvfHKWmItsThe reason you have 3 different types of checkboxes in your design system is the same reason you have 3 different t… https://t.co/T9QscUTvsY
1/28
2020
@joemccann You don’t believe in The Correction™️?
1/27
2020
@Mandy_Kerr @philhawksworth 🇺🇸 @Mandy_Kerr @philhawksworth Y’all, possums are gross. Go with your guts. (I say this from the heart of possum count… https://t.co/N1DY3gjvR7
1/24
2020
naming some things at work with @koop and i think we got it https://t.co/YZeXxzMPQR
1/23
2020
@brianloveswords humble pie more like calm chowder @jarredsumner I guess I’m skeptical of a 10:1 compression ratio over h264 with no quality difference @jdan @bradkovach @kentcdodds i can back this up @drk @seldo This, and it disappears after you play it.
1/22
2020
@maddievision Personally I’d just wait 10 minutes @jarredsumner This tweet does not contain enough information to be useful. Are they equivalent quality? Bit depth? Etc
1/21
2020
@oacgnol is this where jeggings go when they die
1/19
2020
Austin was named after “Stephen F Austin.” Houston was named after “Sam Houston.” And Dallas was, of course, named after “Larry Dallas.”
1/18
2020
@gabhubert miss u @jdan even in the book they discuss how it was probably pointless @jdan @paul_irish wasn’t slideUp your addition? @blumenfeld what if all six were free-throws, that’s not nothing
1/17
2020

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