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My name really isn't Sara; I just don't want my students googling me & finding out I say fuck. (she/they) https://t.co/902BF7q2gL

819 Following   38,221 Followers   36,176 Tweets

Joined Twitter 7/8/13


you’re telling me one of these things took out dan crenshaw’s eye https://t.co/pXFfaXaY3D
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Date: are you on birth control Me: I have an ied implant Date: oh hahah you mean IUD Me: *pelvis starts ticking* no.maybe the real $2000 check was the friends and family members we lost along the way
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)I forgot to memorize a monologue for an audition sophomore year of high school and I was so embarassed I became a t… https://t.co/oOF67bdTDq
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)me: you stole my joke dude: CALM DOWN it’s only Twitter me: retweet mine then dude: NEVER! MY TIMELINE IS A NUANCED BRAND
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @TanksFTM @CaitCamelia :/ @Quantum_King_ @CaitCamelia Obviously it was the same date, TJI’m bringing a tape measure on the first date, we gonna see if you really “6’0” 🤨
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)if screens bad why watching big screen while holding little screen feel so good
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @ElyKreimendahl @ngocbbuii @mistakoy @Jest_Iris @tinylilbaby1 @ElaniKitten @MILFWEEED @showmetheyamzhttps://t.co/42lxceDGbf @rjpdx @trap_jazz You may wanna sit down for this one @tropicanapussy @TheKitchen4U 14 followers away from ass for all of us, do the right thing, y’all @chaoticye It’s like you’re doing Niles cosplay the way you didn’t even read what I saidgo to sleep you very stupid bitch
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)this is why you love sea shanties, explained simply https://t.co/DvJAzPWXQk
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)ate some pasta and i'm still sad? life is a scam
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)URGENT. PLEASE SHARE. SHE WAS GRABBED ON THE CORNER BY 3 OFFICERS. https://t.co/XSQLS02AlO
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @GutsDanson @ElyKreimendahl How fucking embarrassing, seriously, stop doing thisif you like sea shanties... can I tell you about union work songs? https://t.co/gFEDbJPnB6
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)wipe your tears queen you're crying over someone who won't even let you peg him
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)"I hope this email finds you well!" Me: https://t.co/0eYL0TisqI
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @lol_Ham3z I cannot stop laughing at thisWhen ya homeboy pop in his Mixtape and that hoe ass but you still need that ride.... https://t.co/wYLmYKrlqP
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @chaoticye This is exactly what I follow your alt for @GutsDanson @ElyKreimendahl Literally nothing about this is right.unbothered, moisturized, in my lane, focused, flourishing https://t.co/uCpvEZ9j0v
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @sgtballsvevo Hell yeah! Good job, Thom!!!
1/16
2021
“you take really long showers” correct it is my only escape from my family
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @milkglutton_ FUCK YEAH!!!! @dave_cactus Oh my god I love them @kyry5 I DIDNT KNOW UK SEASON 2 STARTED I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED @SaeedDiCaprio Pallavi, don’t read this! Saeed… hello27✨ happy birthday to me https://t.co/zPhjDH547c
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @ambdotcom Happy birthday!!! @SaeedDiCaprio Oh hell yeah! @WillieJonesssss @AudreyPorne Next time, just don’t click the reply buttonmen: i want a girl w big perky tits, perfect features, clear skin, no makeup, size 6 but eats like a wrestler, fat… https://t.co/gyYssm36W5
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)if you start a sentence with “if I may” you may shut the fuck up
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @PallaviGunalan Oh my fucking godstomi lahren having a nose ring is queer baiting
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)
1/15
2021
you've heard of a sea shanty, now get read for,, https://t.co/zKHX0HmEz3
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @memetazaa Those are my favorite parts!accidentally just held my dab pen up in zoom class so I pretended to start writing with it
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @showmetheyamz @itskristofer @spicycasserole @codinghater @abbygov @Brittymigs @rishipuff @Quantum_King_ @NILES100https://t.co/sxJyENoWpuonce i let a man come inside me and immediately afterwards he casually said “btw i’m pro-life”
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Do you want to know how I avoided getting covid from my positive symptomatic roommate with whom I share a bathroom?… https://t.co/LrOgU7Vqh5
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)this is never going to get old https://t.co/Ioa4SvKTH2
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)if i was on naked and afraid not only would i be the most naked but i would also be the most afraid
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Hi guys, I need urgent financial help for the month, as well as the next month, and I would really appreciate anyth… https://t.co/VlthNqM17A
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @justky1018 You are too perfecthttps://t.co/M0ZGfiCVt0 https://t.co/tMxbZMgY6B
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)
1/14
2021
This guy faked having covid just so I’d leave him alone. LOL me and my antibodies gonna marry this nigga
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)i literally assume everyone is gay. today my boss was like “my wife packed me lunch today” i was like oh my god, th… https://t.co/wuXfIggV2G
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)https://t.co/fsHakGSDGP
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)my dad is Q https://t.co/NJLlP8pGk8
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)this week on the @clowncast_ we have our first ever special guest THE @roywoodjr! and he wants a word with the nigg… https://t.co/GPjRDiNjrQ
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @sgtballsvevo 4A# I will not be accepting any other answers @MuthoniK20 Oh my GOD😍😍😍😍https://t.co/9HE5chmz7C
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)having to do bad things on earth to get a shot at beating ronald reagan's ass in hell https://t.co/sAUKYnxr2V
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @ashhhhhhole @femaleredhead @drivingmemadi @PallaviGunalan @alimadetweet @okiecorri @goooeydisk @parrspectivehttps://t.co/rWQpfr0Vgui just think that weeping willows https://t.co/M5C8aksej5
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)2021 is the year of the sea shanty https://t.co/ohOAGvkbtC
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)They shouldve killed scott pilgrim at the end
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @milkinhisbag kranchsexting be like https://t.co/GiE4V9ird8
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @hm3clayton @frankieplsrelax Fucking delete this replyHe was 47 https://t.co/SUYqxkMJvA
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)
1/13
2021
@frankieplsrelax It was seriously the best thing that’s happened to me so far this yearshe in her gc fighting for her life cuz she sent a pic of you
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)everyday i am grateful that i'm not dating a person who plays an instrument
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)this mf trying to die hard https://t.co/qiqfeyanox
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)this guy cornered me at a party and forced me to read his feminist screenplay. when i went to leave he asked "where… https://t.co/c1cBQtxKib
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)is he ...u know .... https://t.co/eewTaZBVYx
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)shut up pay me https://t.co/Bd3rTQ3K1s
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)my cousin does not know how much i defend her baddie lifestyle from the rest of our family when she’s not around .… https://t.co/IOOS8ArI35
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Buddy in the orange on that SHIT😭🤣 https://t.co/9rn40pWa6R
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @YuckyTom @FredTaming Okay but the 3 boobs…if u can’t take the heat i ✨implore✨ u to stay outta the mf ✨kitchen✨ https://t.co/KmdA7bgLLW
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)The "I Love Lucy" opening credits are the first queer thing in television history. Write "Vivian Vance" in beautifu… https://t.co/QTdxuBro83
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @sherrysworld gn Sherry! @ObscureGent I love y’all so much
1/12
2021
periods are like snowflakes: each one is unique and if you hold your mouth open long enough mine can melt on your tongue
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)In this final comic of the Obscure Gentlemen I ask my brother a question and thank you all for all of the great mem… https://t.co/XOAcGFSHCK
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara) @ElyKreimendahl @HeavenlyGrandpa @itskristofer @Jest_Iris @jestom @AmySilverberg @showmetheyamz @GraceGThomashttps://t.co/Ty1aXa8Jwu @Elizasoul80 @yedoye_ Yeah yeah yeah! @TheMcKenziest @yedoye_ Hell yeah!!! @abbycohenwl @yedoye_ Abby, you are too fucking wonderful literally always, I love you!could a mosquito drink blood out of a cup or something or are they legally required to capri sun my legs all summer
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Oh hey! I don’t know how many people are awake right now, but if at least 10 of y’all could stop what you’re doing… https://t.co/oGMMxQ43ch @_justwinnie @jennapurrlee @NILES100 @MILFWEEED @doinkpatrol @abernothing @lol_Ham3z @CaitCamelia @tropicanapussyhttps://t.co/hXIGWhrBNwstraight ladies me https://t.co/GADMFJlYr3
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)
1/11
2021
if the love ain’t like a sims glitch i dont want it <3 https://t.co/4804QxKfrN
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)“I’m actually really nice” -mean people
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)gf sent me a recommendation https://t.co/KYOL0qiRrs
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)Please do not message me this shit. https://t.co/JwcraozmdQ
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)i can’t believe they haven’t kicked me out yet https://t.co/tmXhCTgEUh
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)when i was seven, i had to give a urine sample at the doctor's office. amazed, i came home and told my baby sister… https://t.co/sptrhTW4Wd
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)not spider-man punching me in the chest and collapsing a lung cuz i snatched a purse
Retweeted by Hillary (not sara)
1/10
2021

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