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SueCorvette🇨🇦 @suecorvette Planet ClaireBroBear

I might like you better if we slept together 😴 some of my best tweets 👉👉👉

3,591 Following   9,673 Followers   82,027 Tweets

Joined Twitter 3/26/14

"When I'm not fighting aliens, I love the smooth, satisying richness of Cuban tobacco." - Cigarney Weaver
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @English_Channel not at all these red flags make me look fat?
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦him (crying): why are you doing this me: you’re known by the company you keep (locks door)
@damnfinetweet @HoldinCoffeeld you’re welcome Holdin. it’s a beautiful piece of prose @Royal_Stein this is my emotional support squid! (will be my next tattoo once i can get an appointment), it's the holidays. Time to wander the neighborhood stealing pies cooling on window sills
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @bobblegagger @adamgreattweet @PoodleSnarf @CallMe_Dimps @troubleinheels1 @MissV12345 @BatHawkDown @ByrdMan0914 @denver_rose my hairdresser made me promise to not self colour again and then charged me $250 @CrockettForReal interrupting cow w ... moo! still makes me laugh to this day! 😂😂😂 @difficultpatty @CrockettForReal @Shade510 ha! i remember that one but the punch line was safety pinned to the punk rocker 😂😂😂How did you come up with the name of your company? Adidas: My nickname in college was Adi Audi: It was my nicknam…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦If anyone is looking to nap vicariously, I'm now accepting requests.
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @PopeAwesomeXIII @adamgreattweet @urmumsausername don’t worry Pres. i won’t tell anyone how sweet you behind that mask ❤️ @urmumsausername @adamgreattweet @PopeAwesomeXIII ClaireTheBroBearWhoNeverShutsUp lots of love ❤️ and lots of laug… @damnfinetweet @LJokerella awww thank you lovely lady! you’re truly a delight ❤️❤️❤️ @CafeinatedBacon @GretchenVB @EthanOpia_ @Chelle_Coops @AtCouchyB @CandyEmpires @Tobi_Is_Fab @CrockettForReal used to mix metaphors but then i got a blender[Spelling bee] Judge: Your word is redacted Me: R*******
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @LJokerella oh he wants more than that. i think he wants my soul @JennaEllisEsq @RudyGiuliani i can’t believe you don’t shut up @LJokerella oh fuck!!! it’s anatomically correct!!! make it stop!!! @spacewizard_t ok that’s just freaky @IndecisiveJones or pockets? (not that i would ever eat one of those)People assume fat men chuckle warmly in a good natured way. If I’m chuckling it’s probably because some kid hit him…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @adamgreattweet i am thankful for you (of course) and my bff ClaireTheBroBearWhoNeverShutsUp aka @urmumsausername a…'s officially the holidays; I just saw a LeBron James’ cranberry Sprite commercial
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @dotsboy not anymore @KariMcNinch @WSJ really? you’re the only other person i know who says thatWe're laughing in a group, trading secrets and hugging, only it's me and my Raggedy Ann doll, and she's turning her…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @ShellHasDragons @damnfinetweet i find sex dolls creepy myself Earhart and her navigator Fred Noonan loved to smash, except for that last time
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @urmumsausername @luvleelyd how lovely! @WSJ i guess i’ve always had covid because coffee smells like cat pee to me @Jupiter_917 @dotsboy lol maybe next time i won’t shower first @Hudibrastic @adamgreattweet bahahahahaha!!! @dotsboy why? because he asked for a surprise of course @RIchgard @funflaps not in my joke, no 😂 @Jupiter_917 @dotsboy oh dear lord! i didn’t turn it on!!! 😂 @JennaEllisEsq in the words of the great Apu to Ned Flanders: why don’t you shut up? i can’t believe you don’t shut up @Jupiter_917 @dotsboy 😂😂😂 @RachelMoreaux yup and yup @EdgarPoop1 😂i accidentally put night cream on this morning and i immediately slipped into an alternate realitySo over on Facebook, Joann now has 14 accounts because she can't remember her password.
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦if you ain't eating it from the back, someone else is ~me as a backyard therapist
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Micky4203 yup! mahahahahahaha!!! @adamgreattweet @wearfigs well if @wearfigs needs an influencer to promote their stuff, it def should be this starv… @Micky4203 👍 be a good guess. remember i’m the one who hid in the dishwasher for a laugh 😂 @ShellHasDragons @damnfinetweet my daughter once had a collection of porcelain dolls. and then she went missing and… could feel her eyes on you even as you moved about the room. Her porcelain skin was flawless, except for the cr… @adamgreattweet those are the sexiest pants ever to those of us who plan on marrying a doctor one day .... @Micky4203 lol yes but she totally represents the little smirky smile i do 😊oh yeah? could a depressed person do this ?? *lies on the floor for 6 hours*
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦Zeus: I have a girlfriend but she lives in Quebec. Poseidon: Oh yeah what's her name? Zeus *looks at ruler*: ...Deux Meter
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @adamgreattweet pics or it didn’t happenConfession: I have a pair of pants I refer to as my “sexy pants”
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Jupiter_917 @dotsboy oh yes. those jets hit all the orificesWho decided to call it boob play instead of... ᵃᶜᵗⁱᵛⁱᵗⁱᵗˢ?
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @PrincessHelenL i’m sure it will but please reach out if it gets too much ❤️ @BetsyAnderkin i’m so glad to hear that. you’ve been lucky enough to find @PopeAwesomeXIII who wanted to be sure yo… @Micky4203 @dotsboy had to take out the racks. there’s not much i won’t do for a laugh @urmumsausername your friend’s baby has such a old soul🏆 Tweet Contest 🏆 Horror prompt: Creepy Dolls. Max 2 tweets. Original content only. Runs Wednesday 11am GMT+2, end…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Micky4203 lol hiding in the dishwasher was anything but beautiful!me: what do you want for dinner him: surprise me [later] him (walking into the kitchen): hon? what’d you decid… @jaybug555 @OctopusCaveman 😂 @tg14926 😂 @OctopusCaveman damn you @toomanycommas3 yes!!! you get it! @KaviSi10 @reallifemommy3 lol i literally make those faces whenever i use it @Aikiwomannc 😂 😘 @toomanycommas3 we are not the same📂 Pissing the night away └📁drinks a whiskey drink └📁drinks a vodka drink └📁drinks a lager drink…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @OctopusCaveman do we have to? @NevrEverTooLate such a good song! @bshorhozer 1987. officially an antiquewhat about Mike and the Mechanics? you're telling me they're qualified to fix my car? and what about One Direction…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @reallifemommy3 this is mine which shows show confuses i am jelly beans are the reasons i have trust issues
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Kwattbud1 maybe not lolinterviewer: what’s your greatest weakness me: honesty interviewer: I don't consider that a weakness me: yeah w…
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦if you haven’t referred to it as “my floor” after washing it, you’re just not a mom
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦Neil Diamond: 🎵 I am, I said 🎵 Descartes: that’s what you think
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦Sam: hi welcome to Cheers *music begins to play* Rumplestiltskin: *slowly backs out*
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Tobi_Is_Fab @BetsyAnderkin @urmumsausername my emotional support squid community! @Tobi_Is_Fab @BetsyAnderkin i can confirm Ash and Warren are two of the sweetest people on here. i met my BFF Cla… @MikePosey5 lol true! and my cat. (he thinks he’s a dog) @BetsyAnderkin hi there. i don’t want to be disagreeable but honestly being on twitter HAS renewed my faith in huma… @Cycloptomese i knew you were leading up to this @BeeeejEsq i think this fits the theme @BeeeejEsq thanks Tee .... i mean uh thanks Beej! @The_Albinoshrek @maxoupial i didn’t get the job for the record @The_Albinoshrek @maxoupial happy tuesday! @Cycloptomese lol yes Clopsy. i’ve actually been in the real world where such things are readily available @Invisichad awwww so sweet ❤️❤️❤️me: how’d you sleep last night? him: not great. i barely slept me: you lyin’ dog 🔈 SOUND ON! to brag but I’ve never done anything in an official capacity.
Retweeted by SueCorvette🇨🇦 @Cycloptomese it’s lovely and i’m not the least* bit jealous *completely