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Engineer, game dev, level designer, musician, wiseass. Formerly on The Walking Dead @ Disruptor Beam, Firefall @ Red 5 Studios. Chaotic good. He/him.

352 Following   1,262 Followers   34,955 Tweets

Joined Twitter 12/2/08


every broadway show should be filmed. they should also use different camera set ups all around the stage, and film… https://t.co/rXDHpGAcOq
Retweeted by Dan Jordan @Burrito_Tim That's so noble @Burrito_Tim That's the thing about testosterone: if you get ANY of it in your body you become jacked to hell. As a dude, I know this well.Nice https://t.co/SHnhzvweIi
7/4
2020
@brockwilbur What I'm saying is that he'd either be playing Nirvana's Heart-Shaped Box, Pearl Jam's Rooster, or Stone Temple Pilot's Plush @brockwilbur Johnny B. Goode was released in 1958, three years after the climactic dance and 27 years before Marty… https://t.co/QDSs6zzXL2 @brockwilbur [podcast commercial] Let me tell you, quarantine life has been so much more enjoyable since getting my… https://t.co/CHF47prDPY @Iiboharz Yeah, I imagine it becomes a vicious cycle you don't even realize you're in @cathroon I hope whoever writes my obituary calls me out for it too @Iiboharz I think the Internet affords too many people the ability to surround themselves purely with similarly ter… https://t.co/B1eDd1wbk1Everyone who thinks "leading lines" are meaningful for directing the player's movement or vision should be expelled https://t.co/sahv4yEWhc @cathroon Just tag me next time @vincexsteel In the future every person will be acquired and shut down by EAOh you're a fan of video games? Name 3 studios that shut downguy who invented checks: write the number in English words first, followed by a fraction, then make sure to draw a… https://t.co/wgWkN5JngJ
Retweeted by Dan JordanTechnical artists be like "I know a place" and take you to a patch of terrain with a rock half-buried in it, their… https://t.co/ajHd8hJFgD @Iiboharz Proooobably via @joewintergreenOne of the very first games I tried to make on my own was a cartoonish 3D platformer focused on puzzles and upward… https://t.co/KPyUjk9QWTPositive: new audio systems for music and ambience that make it 1000x easier to add new tracks to environments, plu… https://t.co/8LQ8gLJI8Z @Nican Why isn't the mascot for Linux a fucking lynx? @TafferKing451 [an old warbling cover of Superman starts playing from a phonograph] @WritNelson Look. There's two things gamers love: birds and grappling hooks. My plan-- [giant bags with dollar signs fall into my desk]
7/3
2020
A survival game where you have to learn all your crafting recipes from in-game youtube videos on your in-game phone @johnnemann If I ever emailed friends a URL they would instantly know I'd been kidnapped @craigperko I've spent the morning refactoring a system I refactored before after refactoring it earlier @ItsNotewell Yeah, I just feel like it's a limitation because subtlety is one of his strong suits. @docsquiddy I always want people to yell at me that I'm doing something poorly. I already know but it helps to have confirmation.Look, I know this really isn't the most important thing, but the Lone Ranger wore a mask over his eyes. https://t.co/4J9VfDyQ8YThis is quite interesting. Dude's a hell of an actor but I somehow don't imagine his performance style would transl… https://t.co/L488MhXongI'm averse to starting serious conversations with panic-inducing phrases like "Can we talk about something?", but i… https://t.co/kxFscZz3gh @longwall26 It's his manuscript nowImagine being as rich as Jeff Bezos and not becoming the Sausage King of ChicagoEveryone's making beautiful texture art and I'm like "how do I make a [waves my hands and makes a wub-wub sorta sound]" @bombsfall No. I refuse to hear alternate theories now @brockwilbur MPAA Exec #1: Well we now have this new "PG-13" rating for MPAA Exec #2: Rate it Gwhat was it like growing up in America? well we played in a lot of Officer Big Mac jails https://t.co/yahfOHox0m
Retweeted by Dan Jordan @joewintergreen I think the cool kids use deadjournal @WritNelson @feralvector This is radiating some "founding a new religion" energy @hahahakumakichi I'm going to level with you: none of this should be legalWife: do you want to watch the anime where the guy's head is a gun? Me: [several minutes of sighing] @jellencamara You fool @Enichan I need to lie downEveryone's like "2020 is half done" as if they think 2021 is going to be better
7/2
2020
I couldn't make a living doing all the other things I enjoy https://t.co/dgDyTegdIU @TurfsterNTE RIP teens trying to switch away from pornwhat do you MEAN most coworkers dont know me very well or interact with me at all @Burrito_Tim It's a solid play on words that I had completely missed until you pointed it outCoworker: Why weren't you on zoom for the company celebration? Me, head down working: the what @Burrito_Tim Preemptively seeking forgiveness for when I inevitably vent againI've typed up and deleted like 15 different tweets today that were probably too self-deprecating or straight-up whi… https://t.co/AW4VzKzc38 @JustBrogrammer Thank you, Kirk. I knew I could rely on you in these trying timesA little devil appears on my shoulder. "Make another TF2 map." @craigperko I respect the hustleI suspect I'll be messing around in Townscaper for quite a while https://t.co/PVADCsZv0X @adurdin I have such a love/hate relationship with this game. It's got interesting puzzle mechanics and imperfect p… https://t.co/6B54AIliTu @CNNPolitics Wow, sounds like it's time to protest harder thenResigning my job in disgrace after telling my cat to "move your fat ass off my mouse" over a hot micWhenever I'm working on some long-term task, I inevitably end up getting frustrated with something else and deployi… https://t.co/lgPV0kAeJP @bombsfall Night in the Woods: more big cats than a safari!!!!Happy January 1st, everyone @the_Norberg @notimetoulose @leveldesignfm This pains me @geoffkeene When 3G fights 5G they cancel each other out and you're left with a harmless 2G @GameDesignDan That, as the kids say, 's my fetish @docsquiddy @WritNelson Modern marketing has taken a turnWhile I am a completionist, I'm not normally an achievement hunter. This achievement, however, I am very proud of. https://t.co/R9qW7s70jLThis whole situation has taught me one indisputable truth: we need superpolice to police the normal police @loadingreadyrun @Graham_LRR @Matt_LRR I have been rewatching Dr No for *decades* without ever realizing the tarant… https://t.co/xKci1JHRBl
7/1
2020
@mitchellvii lol sucks to be you @longwall26 The Lone Ranger The Lone Warrior The Lone MageWhen someone doesn't like an indie game they're like "it sucks, whatever." When someone doesn't like a major AAA r… https://t.co/tS7Ysu0sjRHas anyone else had a constant headache for the past 10 years?I just flew into a jealous rage and boy are my arms tired! @lizaledwards You don't cry in all caps nearly often enough @marc_laidlaw How else will we make a mewthree?When does The Last Of Us Part 3 come out?
6/30
2020
@johnnemann Oh that's not my experience. I definitely see it on tables in non-fish restaurants and diners intended for fries. @johnnemann Rhode Island occasionally has malt vinegarI think every state that's reopening now should shut down, sit tight for two months, and then just open up again ju… https://t.co/dARj5IAqCq @craigperko Hold on while I do the math on the average lifespan of a non-electric car on the road and oh look at th… https://t.co/2sgscrsZwj @adurdin Such a good movie @craigperko 50% of cars *sold* by... 15 years from now seems... inadequate?[presses play on music that has been paused for 5 hours] @MitjaRoskaric Level designers be like "I know a spot" and then show it to you from three different vantage points on the way there @TurfsterNTE We should know by now that there are many bad people in the world https://t.co/KULoRynLlGHad a nightmare that I needed to have a game build ready for people to play TODAY!1IT ME https://t.co/3vU4UIy2uGI have put 58,000 hours into Mario Kart 64Dishonored took most people 12 hours but I sunk a cool 24. Just, like, do that for imsims, I guess.Portal is three hours long. Boom, there's your perfect puzzle game length.The correct length of a video game is dictated by its genre. Half-Life 2: Episode 2 and Titanfall 2 are both 6 hour… https://t.co/37P0XgBnJT @dphrygian You're allowed at my birthday party @docsquiddy You pour the milk into a glass first THEN into the cereal (so the cereal doesn't get marginally soggier… https://t.co/dFhgpfPqiD @BuffTuffKRuff I'm actually dumber after having read this
6/29
2020
This efficiently nails several feelings I've had over the past few months. In lieu of artistically fulfilling work,… https://t.co/2FiyT5AzlFIn the future everyone will have their 15 minutes of cancelled
Retweeted by Dan Jordan @longwall26 He's running @lizaledwards I'm almost scared to ask how many hours retopo-ing something like this takesThe world is ready for a sequel to shrimp https://t.co/3qx2wIyRbKHave you considered that the surly cashier at your grocery store might be Sacha Baron Cohen doing a bit? @dphrygian Wait, if you do that does it give you the end credits? Or do you just die and reload?
6/28
2020

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