Sign in with Twitter

Username:

#bzyszn

842 Following   23,500 Followers   1,764 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/13/18


@AJWILLIKERS https://t.co/KEiV2xP7LDmy resume: - bachelors and masters degree in accounting - dean’s list every semester - licensed certified public a… https://t.co/eueT3crdWVinterns when you show them a vlookup for the first time https://t.co/C1JFLK5d9jWhen you get a text from an unknown number after-hours: https://t.co/vLhLOoX6FW
Retweeted by TheBig4AccountantMy two brain cells arguing whether to capitalize or expense during FAR this morning: https://t.co/8GPVOgRnzX
Retweeted by TheBig4AccountantWhen my manager arrives at the client's office and asks "How are we doing?" @TheBig4Tweets https://t.co/lEHUrVy10M
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountantwhat’s something you can say during sex but also when you manage a brand twitter account?
Retweeted by TheBig4AccountantFinance: “can you please remove this from the expense account to the balance sheet as pending capitalization?” Me… https://t.co/MAh97Z0Esh
Retweeted by TheBig4AccountanttHe sEcrET tO dOmiNatINg tAx sEasoN No oNe wIlL TeLl yOu abOuT https://t.co/oYSFJ2t3l1
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountant
12/6
2019
@sydball 115k might be the record hereWhen it comes to do-it-yourself accounting, tax, and estate planning, the words “can” and “should” mean two very di… https://t.co/74pdOIBCAu
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountant @taxchic_k @Average_Beau_ I wish I could double tweet this @NYMike1991 I tried Apple Music but can’t stand the user interface @fabiolaaa1_ 😂 @n_noctis i am as basic as they come my friend @TheRealCogan 90k is the most I’ve seen now, Jesus lolmurderer: [cocking gun] any last words me: if the earth is dying, why don’t we depreciate land? murderer: [putting down gun] holy shithere’s mine https://t.co/NMinjAjtLhpost your spotify wrapped ⤵️ curious to see what all the accountants listen tome: *sends work to manager for review thinking I did a great job* review notes: are u in the right headspace to r… https://t.co/fAGPF4SeWifilling it out and doing it correctly are two different things https://t.co/KEra3051hIwhy do people act like a high school class on personal income taxes would have taught them how to fill out their 10… https://t.co/xGbwQDJKVkhe's making a spreadsheet. he's sorting it twice. *Data* *filter*. behavior = 'nice' Excel Clause is comin' to town
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountant
12/5
2019
@ForemanTaxLaw hahaha just saw it, missed it. actually a tax accountant though 🧙🏻‍♂️“except as otherwise..”“unless...”when you’re doing accounting or tax research and think you found the answer https://t.co/7U24TPiSJg @aperry23x nopewhen you’re in the christmas spirit but busy season starts in less than a month https://t.co/S2b6KA6wN0when people ask me how my accounting job is going https://t.co/X5Kk2IGsJ2Operating Capital Expense Expense https://t.co/ghbPPkdxz4if you were one GL account, which one would you be? @siinchi 💀really goes in at the 28 sec mark- balance sheet check = 0.00 ✅ - opening retained earnings agrees to prior year ✅ - trial balance agrees to the fin… https://t.co/mFxpNCC5zT @B_Bain jus laughed out loud lolname something you can say in the office and also during sex https://t.co/JS88hyu2Gd @mghowssi https://t.co/zYPkQmmlfd @ashley_kinga @imzackcain @keplerniko https://t.co/FvgVv5amDD
12/4
2019
what interns want: fraud what auditors want: a quick, fast and easy auditmanager: any update on the workpapers? I’d like to start reviewing later this afternoon. me: *hasnt even started t… https://t.co/InYMTQ0wqTone benefit of public accounting is if you work a 15 hour day, they buy you a $17 salad.NASBA: are you in the right headspace to receive information that can possibly hurt you right now? me: no, but go… https://t.co/AzIv2LNSL2what wine pairs best with depreciationmy client after dodging my meeting requests and sneaking out early https://t.co/23rAyWRjcxa scavenger hunt but for unrecorded liabilitiesaccounting professor ready to explain debits and credits to my dumbass for the 3rd time https://t.co/JIk8IGz3xzi’m gonna tell my kids this was artificial intelligence https://t.co/5pvXNGqo5u
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountanteveryone: married, 2-3 kids me: single, 50-100 review notes*client sends updated trial balance* https://t.co/qBq5dqvPcP
12/3
2019
any task can take 8 hours if you try hard enough - interns23 days until 24 days until Christmas Busy Season https://t.co/9WyV9BsOKXcoworkers make the best (free) therapistsi need that edit tweet button @TwitterIf you didn’t document it, it didn’t happen.” me: https://t.co/ylRL2uXOJFYOU SAID THIS ENGAGEMENT it is different WOULD BE it’s worse DIFFERENT https://t.co/KQUvB9iok0me and the intern trying to explain to the manager what the client just told us https://t.co/4OR8CbyaSa
12/2
2019
crush: you were in my dream last night me: oh yeah? crush: haha yeah, you were doing my taxes, it was weird me:Girl: [flirting] do you have any wild fantasies? Me: client to send me the support i requested Girl: no I mean li… https://t.co/UV1wEkSBXNaccounting is like an onion. the more layers you peel back, the more you cry.The objectives of the auditor are to: my brain: don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it don’t say… https://t.co/DQKsdDuWeGDoctor: Googling stuff online doesn’t make you a doctor Accountants: https://t.co/s1BtBejYjd“On the eighth day, God separated the debits from the credits.” Genesis 1:36 @cpaesquilin 😂😩https://t.co/tVzCXaCv4SGirl: [flirting] so do you have any wild fantasies? me: a spreadsheet that imports my bank feed daily, categorizes… https://t.co/cUkkUu4gby
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountant
12/1
2019
Birth Control Effectiveness: Condoms - 99% Birth Control - 99% “I’m an Accountant” - 100%friend: any New Years Eve plans? me: probably an inventory count, you?marrying someone is like finally issuing an unqualified opinion, except over 50% of audits don’t lead to misstatements.*Ok I’m ready for the cpa exam* 1st question: The objectives of the auditor are to: me: https://t.co/USgMEyQaVy[partner meeting] "we should release a survey to our employees to see what we can do to make this a better place t… https://t.co/VasfNvZAUqcaption this https://t.co/h0aomsQ9oRMe: just sum those numbers really quick Coworker: =B5+B6+B7 Me: https://t.co/GhXBcn08lg
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountantwork life balance sheetshappiness is debits = creditswhen the senior stops by to answer all my questions https://t.co/rAJnFudZre
11/30
2019
“If you stare at a liability long enough, it becomes an asset.”
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountantme as a staff approaching the controller of a Fortune 500 company to get an update on the open items, hoping they d… https://t.co/ELud7tV9rP"I found out my colleague made a spreadsheet by calculating sums using a physical calculator and manually entering results in each cell."
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountanttherapy: expensive venting to your favorite coworkers via skype as soon as someone pisses you off: freeaudit and tax people arguing over which one is better https://t.co/f3CGZlH1iMBlack Friday Special: work & study all day and save 100% @samanthangv https://t.co/FzQj3lDvyK
11/29
2019
“Accounting doesn’t save lives, it takes lives.”
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountantwelcome to accounting I recommend the extra soft Kleenexme waiting for my family to stop talking so I can tell them I don’t know anything about tax, nor audit for that mat… https://t.co/qqdORiB25xThings that I’m thankful for: 1. Double-entry accounting 2. Prior year workpapers 3. Managers and seniors that cle… https://t.co/wS45zCEwnvThanksgiving drinking game for accountants take a shot every time a family member asks: - if they can deduct *ins… https://t.co/kShAQCinKfThankful. https://t.co/S4cmGJj07iHusband [doctor]: I discharged a woman who had stage 5 cancer Wife [accountant]: oh, well my error wasn’t materialsuper quick question what the fuck is a derivative
11/28
2019
me: you can’t depreciate land client: why me: idk the technical stuff dude ya just can’twhen you’re typing out a long excel formula in front of the staff and it works first try https://t.co/2nH2blYrKqkinda rude how I wasn’t born smart enough to be a doctorFlight attendant: Is there a doctor on this flight? Dad: *nudging me* that should've been you Me: Not now Dad Da… https://t.co/IVe9HOnm6c
Retweeted by TheBig4AccountantFlight attendant: Is there a doctor on this flight? Dad: *nudging me* that should've been you Me: Not now Dad Da… https://t.co/rBJHZMIZY1
Retweeted by TheBig4Accountant
11/27
2019
[4 pm] manager: [5 pm] manager: [6 pm] me: *shuts down laptop, unzips bag* manager: do you mind just clearin… https://t.co/NtvMs5RFVCwaiting for the realizing you client to send never sent the the support… https://t.co/sFOYXCDgVkGILTI calc https://t.co/0peOnlVlv6Which Hogwarts house is BDO?
11/26
2019

0