Sign in with Twitter

Username:

Trevor Noah and The World's Fakest News Team. Weeknights 11/10c on @ComedyCentral. Donate to @vibrantforall: https://t.co/OYYyznlakD

621 Following   8,631,433 Followers   22,634 Tweets

Joined Twitter 6/22/10


A teacher kissed a pig and ate bugs just to get his students to do their homework. https://t.co/hbpoVexla9Wow, listen to Fox News DESTROY this presidential candidate. https://t.co/Yodlb3l15m @realDonaldTrump Congratulations, Mr. President! https://t.co/B4MKpk1g8QCoronavirus: devastating for humans, not a bad time for animals. https://t.co/aSyMu254DW100,000. Congratulations to President Trump on a true success story. https://t.co/SbuQTllJQH
Retweeted by The Daily Show.@CP3 is telling the story of the day the NBA shut down. https://t.co/Zpd525fGpIPretty people can’t relate to comedians. @mariabamfoo @roywoodjr Watch the full episode of Stand-Up Playback here:… https://t.co/ADhnvZo9Xh
Retweeted by The Daily Show
5/28
2020
100,000. Congratulations to President Trump on a true success story. https://t.co/SbuQTllJQH“We rely on immigrant workers as ‘essential workers,’ yet we don't really want to treat them as essential people.”… https://t.co/TqIDM9F31EJennifer Garner is quarantining with 3 kids, so she co-founded the #SaveWithStories initiative with Amy Adams to re… https://t.co/1iYgJ6JsaeTrevor discusses airport security, New York City snow, french fries and more with members of the studio audience fr… https://t.co/LKqW7eEIjIThe 100-year-old WWII veteran who raised $40 million is becoming a knight. https://t.co/T5UB63TSaSThe year is 2038. White people are no longer calling the cops on innocent black people. Why? @roywoodjr’s shadow fo… https://t.co/BJIyxp1oSD
5/27
2020
Ted Cruz called this woman a “patriot.” https://t.co/KFaWxUnW7C.@kerrymoles on how NYC reduced the number of children in the foster care system from 50,000 to 8,000. For more:… https://t.co/9tKOjhAzapA deep dive into some of the craziest coronavirus conspiracy theories: https://t.co/DhdjywF22oLive music is making a comeback in Germany in the form of one-on-one concerts. https://t.co/Qb3VAq9swn
5/26
2020
Trevor and @BillGates discuss coronavirus testing, accelerating vaccine development, and how the world will rebound. https://t.co/FCuGfaFrCJIf you’re ultra-rich, coronavirus is like everything else in your life: dope as f**k. @Jaboukie reports: https://t.co/OVhpv6CGX4From turning school into an episode of Fear Factor to delivering candy to students, here’s how teachers are making… https://t.co/zWCOeWvtKwFrom at-home dates to people caught cheating on video chat, how has romance changed in the time of corona? https://t.co/ZjAAdtr7xVMike Pompeo was using the State Department like his own personal Make-A-Wish Foundation. https://t.co/TSpcuiIptL
5/25
2020
.@mcuban and Trevor talk about reopening America’s economy in a way that works for everyone. Full interview:… https://t.co/xXgvcgJStmIf kids just wanna watch YouTube, maybe teachers should make their lessons more like make-up tutorials 🤔 https://t.co/YaKFOUzmBFTrump’s fourth-favorite son has some theories on the coronavirus: https://t.co/1KxO7zVLTXTired: 100,000 deaths in 2020 Wired: 1 death in 2001 https://t.co/UiMyBUc6gcThis week’s good news: priests are using squirt guns, Chuck E. Cheese is at the center of a pizza conspiracy, and N… https://t.co/U1tx758H2RVegas is back, baby. Maybe. https://t.co/yqETj4WNdd
5/24
2020
.@YaraShahidi is motivating the graduating class of 2020 with a virtual celebration. https://t.co/aHjfR15wNVWho’s to blame for the Trump administration’s colossal coronavirus failure? Trump can’t make up his mind. https://t.co/ItPlawUx8c“People that are supposed to be the protectors of the rule of law are the ones that are being asked to leave.” - Fo… https://t.co/RCTeiqZEhpAre you a state governor interested in manipulating your coronavirus data? Try Microsoft Excel: Coronavirus Edition! https://t.co/VSh6hHT4byThis week’s top stories: Obama’s commencement address, Trump ‘s hydroxychloroquine regimen, mask wars, and teaching… https://t.co/JLMUKIYYmg
5/23
2020
Why are we still debating whether you have to wear a mask or not? https://t.co/sUaz4WrGsgThis has to be the most heartwarming story about a grown man giving candy to teenagers: https://t.co/9dSfg17Un1Pence wants his wings “not spicy” because of course he does. https://t.co/qe6CVEOLFABots on Twitter are spreading disinformation about coronavirus. Hmm wonder who’s “Putin” those out there. https://t.co/7qdPPdDuxYImagine all the worst guys on dating apps in the same room trying to out-douche each other. Starring @ayoedebirihttps://t.co/feyeF8npQb
Retweeted by The Daily ShowAre you burnt out from teaching virtually? Our substitute teachers can help! https://t.co/2lnW16yJi7Why does Trump stand with his ass popped, his body bent forward, and his t-rex arms dangling? It’s not by accident. https://t.co/LuEhHZMOwmWho is this lawyer walking around Florida beaches dressed like the Grim Reaper? @MichaelKosta finds out: https://t.co/bHnE8Yuae5Teachers adapt to daunting COVID-19 challenges, @michaelkosta talks to Florida's Grim Reaper protester, and… https://t.co/Qt1WY3HmYFFull interview with @tarajiphenson: https://t.co/VC5dTLNfjbMichigan faces unprecedented floods, Lori Loughlin is going to prison, and bots spread coronavirus misinformation o… https://t.co/4B9CL7tPAAThe last thing you see before you’re force-fed chloroquine https://t.co/fpdQxjGTe0TONIGHT: @tarajiphenson is here to talk about her foundation’s COVID-19 Free Virtual Therapy Campaign! https://t.co/1EO3Plx95h
5/22
2020
All 50 states are now at least partially open for business, and Georgia is straight up fudging the numbers. https://t.co/YWNqt7VcwIThis Costco employee was NOT messing around with an anti-mask customer: https://t.co/NF99bbJQ5kTrump targets Democratic states for sending out mail-in ballot applications, a thing Republican states are also doi… https://t.co/B9N4eBvxMgNASA may have discovered a parallel universe where time runs backwards? Sounds good for the first 10 years or so. https://t.co/UPTkVoF3ILFights between maskers and anti-maskers have been going viral, and this Costco confrontation might be the most tell… https://t.co/7hLIoMGAj116 years ago today, Donald Trump gave one of the most inspiring commencement speeches ever. https://t.co/wj97qQ4T4NTrevor covers face mask news, @joseiswriting talks about COVID-19's effects on undocumented immigrants, and NBA sta… https://t.co/nJflfVPMd2Full interview with @joseiswriting: https://t.co/sDhA9BMkQVFull interview with @CP3: https://t.co/AXinhYu7mGThere's two sure-fire ways to piss off Donald Trump: show him that shirtless photo of Obama, and give people access… https://t.co/u3QCnvqY1pTONIGHT: @DefineAmerican founder @joseiswriting is here to talk about the pandemic's impact on immigrants and… https://t.co/3K7Fjy1YRcTONIGHT: @NBA All-Star @CP3 is here! https://t.co/Lg6y0CZYgKHealthcare workers are fighting a war on two fronts: coronavirus and bullsh*t. @jordanklepper investigates: https://t.co/NboxhVg2SR
5/21
2020
Are you a state governor tired of manipulating your coronavirus data? Flatten the curve with Microsoft Excel: Coron… https://t.co/0KV4bKg8WrAny update on this @seanhannity https://t.co/ybUhcH7w0x.@kerrymoles and Brieanna Hayes talk about their experiences working for and being served by the American foster ca… https://t.co/HhATMmOcE9Despite the hurdles of producing late-night television from home, #TheDailyShow has actually increased its nightly… https://t.co/0cBj2od5pu
Retweeted by The Daily ShowTrump is either taking a dangerous, ineffective drug, or he’s lying about it just for the lulz. https://t.co/8epV0Sd506Today we salute our leaders in the White House and at Fox News sending ordinary Americans into battle with a virus.… https://t.co/tWuYTPiukGA new study found three new coronavirus symptoms: confusion, agitation and delirium. https://t.co/6DRqGAdITkHow I’m celebrating today! Thank you to @thedailyshow & @hearluminary teams for all the hard work! 7 Webbys? Wow!… https://t.co/wvyeojpat2
Retweeted by The Daily ShowWe’re at the “Fox News telling its viewers not to listen to the president” stage of the pandemic. https://t.co/E1wv2GgiU2Nurses are fighting two wars: COVID-19 and anti-lockdown bulls**t. @JordanKlepper reports: https://t.co/7sOm0RTNx9President Trump claims to be on hydroxychloroquine, @jordanklepper highlights counter-protesting nurses in North Ca… https://t.co/Wc51RaE2PYFully interview with @CASA_NYC's @kerrymoles and Brieanna Hayes: https://t.co/nyYQebVVk4Trump claims he’s taking hydroxychloroquine, but let’s remember: it’s not what goes into his mouth that makes him a… https://t.co/c9CySpy1ZMTONIGHT: @kerrymoles and Brieanna Hayes are here to talk about @CASA_NYC and New York’s foster care system. https://t.co/Wzyqd9LmwM @DonaldJTrumpJr @JoeBiden Ooh we like joke memes! Did we do it right? https://t.co/dMPuaIA39l
Retweeted by The Daily Show @DonaldJTrumpJr @JoeBiden Ooh we like joke memes! Did we do it right? https://t.co/dMPuaIA39l
5/20
2020
We won 3 #Webbys! ✨ Social Humor - Twitter ✨ Shortform - Trump’s Best Words ✨ Host/Personality s/o @DesiLydic! https://t.co/pJXmBWoeULOne-on-one concerts sound nice, but they definitely won’t work for rap. https://t.co/azaq3lM7e1Fox News doesn't think this man is fit to be president https://t.co/VyBOXxSrnzFull interview with @Madeleine Albright: https://t.co/pmJkt8txrxIt’s pretty hilarious that Obama can say “people have no idea what they’re doing,” and everyone knows he means Trum… https://t.co/32rcnWjSPyDon Trump the Science-ish Guy claims he’s taking hydroxychloroquine, a drug he can’t even pronounce: https://t.co/wcGAJiKdHCHold up https://t.co/D2VU2KrHsqKarl Rove calls Obama’s commencement speech a “political drive-by shooting.” https://t.co/mDwQfyh1mZObama's commencement address might've been world's loudest subtweet https://t.co/1Vd0MG9elMBarack Obama takes a swipe at President Trump, @jaboukie examines rich people in the COVID-19 era, and @madeleine A… https://t.co/v7mZb8jBy9Obama throws subtle shade at Trump in his commencement address and sets off a 5-alarm outrage fire at Fox News. https://t.co/MHMHKxd6QdTONIGHT: Former Secretary of State @madeleine Albright is here to talk about her new memoir… https://t.co/uSZh9MvYZL
5/19
2020
.@JasonIsbell’s new album “Reunions” is out now. Here’s how he came to terms with who he used to be: https://t.co/IWWva0PQqlMitch McConnell tells Obama to keep “his mouth shut.” https://t.co/wil4mCQ1w2Very important to check in on your older relatives… especially if it’s your crazy aunt Jeanine Pirro. https://t.co/azuObbvf0QWho will be the first ever Kid of the Year? @TrevorNoah, @Nickelodeon and @timeforkids are teaming up to help find… https://t.co/LR700T9j4dEvery day Trevor offers a little advice to help get you through quarantine. Here are his top 20: https://t.co/3IxsEzBk1XGonna tell my kids this was #GraduateTogether https://t.co/bVkDO5UrUWCome on down to America for our GRAND re-opening! *America is not responsible if you die during grand re-opening https://t.co/z7pOYfiPsDFrom “it’s a hoax” to “nobody knew,” here’s a timeline of Trump’s coronavirus response: https://t.co/NsufmsVLkmDesperate times call for dumber measures. https://t.co/52HwLGFi5LTo get their minds off coronavirus, millions of Facebook users are pretending to be ants. https://t.co/aPGEn2y9NHThe NYPL released a 🔥🔥🔥 album https://t.co/7ImD1xFeOl
5/18
2020
Mail-in voting, voter registration, and voter ID laws all make Trevor miss South Africa’s more direct brand of raci… https://t.co/odl3sHDm1ghttps://t.co/k3YsHHfZx5
5/17
2020

0