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She/Her. Professional Miracle Worker. Wife to my favorite idiot. Mom to two cats, the sweetest puppy, & most people I meet.

218 Following   208 Followers   9,189 Tweets

Joined Twitter 1/17/12


*sigh* this is just so refreshing https://t.co/zQcsrvrRAJ
1/25
2021
@MutualAid4a NoThe way the cat looked DIRECTLY at the parent like "ARE YOU SEEING THIS? YOU NOT GONNA STOP HIM? Fine.... I'll do… https://t.co/oSTKrCJMzA
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hothinking of how the rock keeps singing “you’re welcome” to his daughter n she still refuses to believe he’s the one… https://t.co/jG12QuNgop
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoA pardon can be reversed if the president who issued the pardon was impeached, according to the 1868 revised editio… https://t.co/SBFhIfUT2w
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI am for sure not ready for kids because I still need things like 800 thread count Egyptian cotton sheetsI desperately want my hair to be this colorrrrrrrrrr https://t.co/nXwLY03zRoMy dad is an ICU nurse and had 7 patients die on him this week. 4 of them died yesterday. They had 2 nurses on staf… https://t.co/xqTkP4YcbXDude right now kids can be sentenced to LIFE withOUT parole. Children. Literal children. https://t.co/UTr1N0LXgythis is absolutely cursed https://t.co/T094urhDKw
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoYesterday I overheard my two year old son saying “Are you sure this is a good idea” and my five year old son replyi… https://t.co/64XYKJnQ1G
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI bought the wrong kind of ginger ale. Why is life filled with so much endless pain.A 6-year old ballet student asked me today if I'm excited about getting my "Fauci Ouchie" soon, and I will now be r… https://t.co/xMSBLZx8PG
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho
1/24
2021
If you worked with this population, you'd know that this is *outrageously* common https://t.co/W2KD0Uevkf @allie_wonderly Teachers are supposed to protect children, not shove them off a giant cliff @allie_wonderly I can see the slytherin for sure. One of the shittiest parts of growing up was learning Dumbledore is a complete asswad @allie_wonderly https://t.co/tNcRivzuujim fucking crying rn https://t.co/Y6CmJcnpji
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoThe thing about this is that he KNEW she would volunteer put her hands up. That was the risk he took because he KNE… https://t.co/6Z8sUPjm4x
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hohttps://t.co/VrVxP8aL51
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @MidwestBasic Same ^^^ @IPSY @aboutfacebeauty All four are an absolute necessity 🥰🔥😍What an asshole???? https://t.co/7G8ubPFefy @gabzdabz @BoneDoctorJD @BandiMandi @FATWEAKTRASH I'd be willing to!“fix your attitude” Me: I don’t have a attitu… https://t.co/cXHd8EGV3W
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @gabzdabz He does not take hints 😂Wow look at these totally random and reasonably priced diamond earrings! https://t.co/qLL59dJCPO
1/23
2021
NYTimes buried this today but this is huge https://t.co/JSef9kH2c0
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hothis is the best video i have ever seen https://t.co/BYa8IWGipG
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoOkay, just one more for the Bernie pile. Bernie in Lord of the Rings. https://t.co/tUldFiZkTn
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI've got news for you https://t.co/yUCd6LAcymLMAO WHO DID THIS https://t.co/1T8123cd0Q
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI apologize for nothing https://t.co/Cg6yTCsrs3
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho
1/22
2021
Yeah, this pretty adequately sums up my feelings rn https://t.co/EgwbojNpJqJoe Biden's proposed immigration bill, if passed, would remove the word "alien" from US immigration laws, replacing… https://t.co/dBzKmCve5z
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoIncredible picture from AP/Evan Vucci. President Biden holds his grandson Beau Biden tonight at the White House. https://t.co/4dh8nAVpQl
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoi am once again asking if he had it comin’ https://t.co/DSKEuWJmGQ
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoJanuary 6, 2021 / January 20, 2021 https://t.co/whAXzVenbo
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @allie_wonderly SO FUCKING SICK DUDE!!!!!!
1/21
2021
The US has rejoined the Paris Climate Accord. The Muslim ban is repealed. There is a mask mandate on federal pro… https://t.co/eoSNAzOUxG
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoImagine being married to the news lady. https://t.co/K9G2ImVZZW
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoMr Biden sir congratulations on becoming the guy who owes me $2000
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoForecast for tomorrow is - 45 bitches!!!!My kid thought that “swearing in” meant Joe Biden was going to stand at a podium on Wednesday and reel off all the… https://t.co/1RtG6QxPyz
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoWhy is no one talking about how the senate didn't finish the impeachment process
1/20
2021
https://t.co/KM00NDWuZH
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI am healthy I am wealthy I am rich I am that bitch https://t.co/gmxnadFEDp
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoA teacher I worked with has just died of Covid. I am NOT OKAY! My face shield arrived today, which I purchased. I… https://t.co/3kBhsmdx25
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoGoing for a stupid walk in the stupid outside to get some stupid fresh air because everything’s stupid https://t.co/D8leyorfnJ
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoThief returns after stealing woman’s car, yells at her for leaving 4-year-old son alone in vehicle… https://t.co/vZYrsvO4qC
Retweeted by jojo the christmas howhen you’re the Zoom host https://t.co/CwYXKl6dEq
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoMe when my homies are sad https://t.co/PtfV0DWwF4
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @leahlizmarty8 Do you have trouble with like, doing stuff on the weekends? I feel like I get there and am so emotio… https://t.co/JyqmOrhcR1 @RosyShaman Dude that's awesome! I'll check it out for sure 🥰 @RosyShaman Was it triggering for you? I really want to watch it but am a little nervous
1/19
2021
@leahlizmarty8 Dude all the time!how the vaccine rollout in the United States is currently going https://t.co/lpY2n5k1zG
Retweeted by jojo the christmas howhen life gives you lemons, just give up. just fucking give up.
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoSometimes, I'll have a session and be like "this is the absolute saddest story that could possibly ever exist" and… https://t.co/Jn363WI4FUAnimals interrupting wildlife photographers. A thread: 1. 📸 Dan Dinu https://t.co/FYfohHAucq
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @MutualAid4a BUT IT'S *INTERESTING*Me: It is LITERALLY imperative for me to read fluffy books to cope with the vicarious trauma that comes with my job… https://t.co/MGGJ9x4K2M
1/18
2021
This is messed up bro I’m checking all my masks ASAP https://t.co/bfReM6Ttp3
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoNobody: The Oregon Trail in 1850: https://t.co/MbhO5LIi4y
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI’ve seen more pictures of Dr. King in color on Twitter than I ever have in history books https://t.co/fx3DR8RSY1
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @MutualAid4a Thank you, I appreciate your supportI am cute, therefore, I should buy sweaters on sale to make me more cute??I put my microphone in front of a 7 week old baby red squirrel. https://t.co/JrRRvE9ngN
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @Fugate_theGreat Miss you 😘Spongebob exposing America .. https://t.co/lsDZyIhW7C
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @marykwates Oh yeah 😭 @marykwates AJ at Evolved is so good 🔥
1/17
2021
When you consider a gallon of milk is like $3.50 how can you justify ppl still being paid $7.25
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoOh my god could you imagine https://t.co/ygobxWa1hTOhio Statehouse, Columbus, Ohio 2021 https://t.co/3uwbv2064e
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hohttps://t.co/SP5paudpa5
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho$1,400 is perfect! My rent is $16 a month and I don’t eat food
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoThats support, bro https://t.co/Yerv2vuAmEhttps://t.co/gqbcXQb4Vk
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoColumbus please be careful this weekend. https://t.co/jeyvIhgXik
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho
1/16
2021
@CashApp $jordinmariaThe coronavirus pandemic’s global death toll has reached 2 million. That’s as if 10 of the world's largest commerci… https://t.co/MGbfyN6S5j
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hosorry for the delay in getting back to you, i was experiencing a profound personal crisis amidst the rapid decline of civil society
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @allie_wonderly It's just fuckin weird @allie_wonderly I don't like it. It makes me uncomfortable too @allie_wonderly The possibility of drowning? Flooding? 😬 @marykwates Fluffy shows, like sitcoms! I love King of Queens & Everybody Loves Raymond. They help me shake off heavy daysWhen is the senate going to do the thing
1/15
2021
In the last year, I've eaten in a restaurant fewer times than the president has been impeached.
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoI’m so sick of seeing Christians in America claim persecution. You aren’t being persecuted for loving Jesus you a… https://t.co/ZywotQcLvY
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hooh my god. it took him nearly 6 months to recover, but folks, captain teeny has struck again https://t.co/GcYCWXiBDz
Retweeted by jojo the christmas hoWhy should you go to jail for a crime somebody else noticed?
Retweeted by jojo the christmas ho @marykwates Okay https://t.co/RfyM4vzv5AFucking devestated about my cookies. https://t.co/HGRdjMGJNL
1/14
2021
Drs. Nick VanHorn, Bryant, & Burgdoff!!!! https://t.co/BrUnG1PUvMOkay this was a good one https://t.co/XMaJEw6r1oCOOKIE-LESS https://t.co/uITXhW3hLbWell, it's 3pm. I don't feel well, no one has been impeached, and I am cookie-less.678 999 8212!!!!!!!!!!!! https://t.co/ZxmkvQq4rL
1/13
2021

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