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Will Nett @will_nett 54.5753° N, 1.2342° W

Author. Traveller. Semi-retired dreamboat. Dickhead intolerant. Speaks great bad French.

370 Following   221 Followers   1,301 Tweets

Joined Twitter 10/26/13


"I know words. I know the best words." @Sixth_Element #bunkerbooks https://t.co/AZxfdNnICd https://t.co/r9vGWjXFrC @Bob_Fischer @BBCTees Silly Games trivia; apparently co-written by master art forger John Myatt.Grew a full beard during @Peston question at today's covid briefing. #coronavirusqaMy attempt to 'sort out the tinfoil' has turned into a scene from Terminator 2. https://t.co/rqKDFrX0zj @BBCTees @PeteBarronMedia 'Fur richer; fur purr-er'
6/3
2020
@nalaknip I bet he's still talking, now...
6/2
2020
@msloobylou Thank goodness her bio makes clear that she despises animal cruelty, in case we thought she was in favour of animal cruelty. @Bob_Fischer @BBCTees Spin the whole of 'Wizzard Brew'We're almost halfway through; haven't heard from anyone, yet. How's it working out so far? https://t.co/RYPPqsMzpN
6/1
2020
@90sfootball Andy Cole in a Nottingham fishmarket. I've got them somewhere in old mags. @nalaknip Now you mention it, my 'Slam wins really tailed off when I started wearing them. @nalaknip This has just reminded that I used to wear something called 'Mizuno' I thought they were bees knees. @nalaknip Teamed with a Superdry t-shirt; a great look.
5/31
2020
@NclUtd_Memories Peter Beardsley while I was dredging a beck. @msloobylou Just recommend a book to them. They'll soon disappear. Works every time.
5/30
2020
@real_meaning Not a clue; I've written 3 since, and the first one was by far the most fun I've had writing. @slowbones @utb_smith Another mug, dazzled by the illusion of Tory prosperity, to be added to a very long list.'Roses are red; Heinz make spaghettis.... https://t.co/7UNIx5YFI9 @outonbluesix Gotye 'Somebody That I Used To Know'
5/29
2020
@PobertReston @BorisJohnson Don't forget to bring it up next to you get to question him. Which you won't.Hi #writers, are you based in Teesside? We're putting together an online directory of #authors who are based in the… https://t.co/m31jVJowNj
Retweeted by Will Nett @Flying_Inside Good listen; I could just about hear it over the thunderous god-awful hip hop coming from next door's garden @TeessideLive Are the bus stop and knickers thing related?
5/28
2020
@stephbreakfast Not so much cutlery, but there's been some heated exchanges regarding the communal office toothbrush.
5/27
2020
@thomas_dickson9 I might use that in the reviews, if you don't mind; "aye; it's alright, mate" 😂Teessider - English - British https://t.co/0t650bVi7U
Retweeted by Will Nett @thomas_dickson9 I hear it's a good read... @jamiesmart A Town Called Panic
5/26
2020
"Well, officer; I thought I'd just go for a whizz down the road. My eyes were a bit sore. How are they now?" https://t.co/wsjpyxe1oqAn he's just the warm-up act; good look with the main event PM!Funerals - no Automobile based eye tests - absolutely
Retweeted by Will Nett
5/25
2020
@PaulMaynardUK @SteveBakerHW @SirRogerGale You lot; fall in line and get back to enforcing policy dictated by Domin… https://t.co/wqeKJM6cZv @piersmorgan You've already voted for him, Piers; you've served your purpose. Off you go. @chrisdeerin Stumpy from Spinal Tap @michaelglasper Rather more alarmingly; @DominicCumins appears on p26 frame 4 of 'Lotus Bleu' presumably en route t… https://t.co/RMHuhtVyOF
5/24
2020
After a socially distanced garden drink with a neighbour, his 'right; fuck off I'm going to bed' music choice was… https://t.co/Rb4DuPwq91 @hendopolis As a known 'lover visitor' Johnson knows what he's talking about here. @DehennaDavison Somebody frame this tweet and hang it on the wall.On tour https://t.co/vPHDaVBJ3c
Retweeted by Will Nett @grantshapps Can you give some of those cycling vouchers to Dominic Cummings. He'll be on his bike soon enough. @Fenmonkey @michaelglasper Definitely the best artwork, in my opinion. @Mick4Boro @utb_smith It will appeal to the vanity of the people who voted for him. @Mick4Boro @utb_smith They are.Dictated to by Dominic Cummings; an 'unelected bureaucrat' making his own rules. It's like being in the EU again, i… https://t.co/W7txROv7TESongs To Drive To Durham To Vol.1 'Hit The North' The Fall '500 Miles' The Proclaimers '(Take Me Home) Country Road… https://t.co/bIN70z99J1 @unrealpeloton @Sixth_Element Y'know, this is the sort of thing @channel5_tv would commission.Lines now closed.I can reveal the actual reading was 027503.The international panel judged @will_nett 's entry (6)… https://t.co/IYNmbvqyYz
Retweeted by Will Nett @annaturley Biden's apology for a remark he made yesterday will be seen as a sign of weakness. @michaelglasper "I'll tell you who else made a last-ditch 260 mile advance against the advice of his colleagues." https://t.co/2GthH0A6Sf @annaturley There will be NO apology; a la Trump etc. An apology would signal an admission of wrongdoing. @piersmorgan Sounds like an ideal candidate for Editor of a national newspaper. @michaelgove Michael's gonna need Cummings on board if he's ever going to be PM.Looking fwd to some intense journalistic scrutiny at tonight's press conference. #dominicgoings @michaelglasper I like it when people say 'I was gonna say that' about some 'hilarious' pun or comment. @michaelglasper Are there any other 'celebrities' who's disability he's looking to denounce; has he seen Douglas Bader trampolining?
5/23
2020
@unrealpeloton 6? Based on the reckoning that you're tapped into the Yarm WI village hall supply.People of Guisborough: it's 2 *METRES* not 2 inches; nice to get acquainted, though.Hi Gary, brilliant talking this morning about our WE ARE BORO Short Story Competition! Many thanks for the chat!… https://t.co/SM9abiBxaR
Retweeted by Will Nett
5/22
2020
@outonbluesix That I was dead. I very nearly was; but hear I am. See also 'Oscar Wilde' 'greatly exaggerated' etc etc
5/21
2020
@GaryAPhilipson @BBCTees Are you a flat-earther, Gaz; because that would influence my answer!?
5/20
2020
@DailyMailUK I could buy the Daily Mail, or I could hammer 50p right into my forehead which would have the same eff… https://t.co/BwEhMWp6tN
Retweeted by Will Nett @adebagley @ElPataLoco I often wonder if 'I'm writing a book' is any sort of plausible legal standing!? @DarrackMark How big do you think my feet are?The 'hive mind' of writers' is disturbingly entertaining, and very useful!My latest seemingly-absurd book research questions; responses welcome, however nonsensical... 1. Does anyone have a… https://t.co/Rpg0Khw8ra @Jharrison22 @Tees_Issues No vans, currently; as I understand it. @unrealpeloton Is a 'barrel of laughs' technically a sea-going vessel? @Jharrison22 @Tees_Issues Access to the recycling site is free, certainly for Boro & Stockton; book via your local authority website. @Dippley I would guess, Fowler. @JohnStapletonTV Have you slipped out of the Top 100, John; why would you expect sensitivity from a British newspaper? @piersmorgan @BorisJohnson He's not coming on. He doesn't need to. He didn't need to during the election, and doesn… https://t.co/1VUEl8yHkb
5/19
2020
My Plans 2020 https://t.co/0w1fRCLq1m @michaelglasper I had reason to write 'Perugia, Rio and Scunthorpe' today, in relation to Boro. You can join the dots yourself. @PaddySisyphus @T_om_s That's the biggest 'banter' I've ever seen. @outonbluesix @InvaderAce1 Icicle Works, which was essentially Boulder Dash in the snow.
5/18
2020
A last shout for this flashback to 20 years ago when Boro took part in a surreal and scary PR exercise for a blood-… https://t.co/nLG0bmX8xO
Retweeted by Will NettAlmost time to commence my latest TV crush on @nicolejcd #TheRanganation @Flying_Inside I think that's how Seaman himself got the job. @SundayBrunchC4 Who's parting Keith Urban's hair these days; Moses? https://t.co/TJBI3r8zkhDoes it seem like an obvious answer? I'm not sure. . . @RoylePin @thetimes I've slipped out of the Top 75,000,000 over the last year.My quiz question stumped everyone last night; which is Yorkshire's only maritime city? Even someone from that city didn't get it!? @mocent0 They originate from Somalia, or thereabouts, so that may explain it. @untypicalboro Cracking read, Vic. 'You was always out on the cocktails, man'😂 @utb_smith Utterly vile with not a single redeeming feature. @EuripidesCrutc1 @fourfoot @dmartw Yes, of course; as a sensitive way of approaching issues realted to mental healt… https://t.co/4rPCl1dweY @yorkshirepost Like Brexit, then? @outonbluesix 'How I Wrote Elastic Man' by The Fall. @GavinCurnow Cow Pasture. Is that one? @fourfoot @dmartw Anyone using the phrase 'Reached out to' instead of 'contacted' or 'got in touch with' etc needs… https://t.co/JoIvDaLUFe @FindingDore @fourfoot @dmartw 'Almost unique' @fourfoot @dmartw 'That's genius' A thing can't be 'genius' it can be 'genial' but not 'genius.' @mickmuldoon @fourfoot @dmartw @JohnTorode1 I realise I've made a spelling mistake above. That's known as 'Muphry's… https://t.co/hzEJIMExBh @mickmuldoon @fourfoot @dmartw @JohnTorode1 Either I fine, but most people wouldn't know that. It's what's known as 'the toff's mistake'
5/17
2020
@nalaknip Covered in fried egg and tea stains. @nalaknip Favouring the classic string vest beneath his shirt.Some classic old school 'gaffering' from Cloughy...from MOTD magazine, early 2004. @MOTDmag @90sfootballhttps://t.co/yVJX3CFYP5 @outonbluesix I saw Rick Witter going to the pictures to watch Mike Bassett: Football Manager.
5/16
2020
@michaelglasper Anthea Turner's glamrock Dictator's jacket stole the show. @andrewhiggins1 @PeteBarronMedia 'Coffee fans' 😆
5/15
2020

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