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Cat @WinningByARose your dads bed

Didnโ€™t choose the messy life it chose me ๐Ÿ’– I am aries af. she/her

1,383 Following   21,348 Followers   17,567 Tweets

Joined Twitter 4/19/09

Iโ€™m outdoorsy in that I like having sex outsidecoffee beans: [evolve to be bitter so as to avoid being eaten] humans: lol slurp slurp
Retweeted by Cat @its_me_your_mom ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @dugglebutt ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @dugglebutt Love a good chomp @dugglebutt There isnโ€™t one where one is eating the otherwhy would I want to smile when thereโ€™s a million other things Iโ€™d rather be doing with my mouth @jojipaints ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–
Retweeted by CatJoin three Tom Pettyโ€™s and also The Heartbreakers as @FLITTER helps us break down the beloved 2016 cult classic POPโ€ฆ
Retweeted by Cat @jojipaints Youโ€™re back!!! ๐Ÿ’– @RenMan00 Nah canโ€™t be arsed. I donโ€™t care ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚my kid wrote a letter to nintendo and they wrote back ๐Ÿ˜ญ
Retweeted by Cat @RenMan00 Itโ€™s whatever ๐Ÿ™„hi ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿป to all my exโ€™s and their mates that watch my fleets. I see you @jojipaints Oh HEY YOUwhy does the sun and a glass of wine make you horny? @human_not_bees YESSSSSSSSme: itโ€™s Aries season him: again? no itโ€™s not me: ok well explain to me why I fucked your dadMe: A gentleman never kisses and tells Wife: Who. Was. She
Retweeted by Cat @itmegreggy @justky1018 @roastmalone_ @climaxximus @lincnotfound @RobDenBleyker greggy I never get tagged in these am made up ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–
Retweeted by CatCommenting โ€œadopt donโ€™t shopโ€ on my friendsโ€™ pregnancy announcements
Retweeted by Cat @roastmalone_ @maxoupial @ashhhhhhole @memetazaa @MILFWEEED @bb_apes @DrakeGatsby @IndecisiveJones @CrockettForRealโ€ฆ @coolmathgame_ ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ @jamie_leeming ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ @Aikiwomannc Ty lovely! ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–I think the Cinderella thing was a coincidence. I think that Prince wouldโ€™ve taken any reason to check out a bunch of strange womenโ€™s feet.
Retweeted by Cat @roastmalone_ COME ON YOU COWARDS RT ITBatman wonโ€™t eat pussy but I bet Ironman would eat you out on your period
Retweeted by Catunder every selfie my niece puts on Instagram of her and her boyfriend Iโ€™m writing โ€˜heโ€™s not good enough for youโ€™, just so she remembers
Retweeted by Cat @colourmesad @abbythetweet lmaoooo so many people have said that about this post and me being soft GOOD LORD AM I THAT BAD?!!! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @colourmesad @abbythetweet Itโ€™s from Love Actually ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’– @memetazaa Oh fgs @memetazaa why are you like this lmao @Terryeverson123 Thanks! @PressWm Ty!June 2020 June 2021โ€œi'm chuffed to bitsโ€
Retweeted by Catwife: letโ€™s do a rough roleplay me: ok iโ€™ll be american healthcare wife: not that rough
Retweeted by Cat @video_jame This is your FAVOURITE thing? Ok.
fixed it i canโ€™t sleep parents: lay there with ur eyes closed me: thatโ€™s literally the first thing i tried
Retweeted by Catdonโ€™t waste your brain cells on someone who only messages you at 2am on a saturday night because theyโ€™re lonely @desukidesu ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ to 80s night at my local. Not a single 80 year old. Very disappointed. 4/10, would not recommend
Retweeted by Cat
@JoshuaLeePwllJr Love youRaise your hands if youโ€™re exhausted of menHey I love being smart and sexy and cool and sociable (!!) and artistic and funny and sympathetic and omg so so funโ€ฆ @thehdrk ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ @Newfiebybirth TyIโ€™ve been invited to a bbq today so I have to speak and be sociable with actual people night I kept saying โ€œTHIS WINE TASTES LIKE OLIVE OILโ€ and this morning it would appear that the bottle I was dโ€ฆ
Retweeted by Cat @RobDenBleyker rob im laughing cos it looks like your avi is even looking at this and sighing w the greggy face ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚Deleting dating apps so I can find true love the old-fashioned way (meeting a girl and doing battle with her 7 evil exes to earn her love)
Retweeted by CatThis is about as good as Twitter responses get.
Retweeted by Cat @Jamberee13 Aww thank you so much! I need a muse to inspire me to do more ๐Ÿ’– @NotKallyn thank you! ๐Ÿ’–
the day Beyoncรฉ forgave Jay-Z was the beginning of the end tbh @Browtweaten @50FirstTates @PatsATweetin @andlikelaura @DrakeGatsby @lynndewitttoya Tysm ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–friend: I was named after my father me: *aware of how time flows* correct
Retweeted by CatWomen in South Korea are protesting labor disparities by using an image similar to this ๐Ÿค emoji to mock the size ofโ€ฆ
Retweeted by Cat @LibertyofFG Oh no currently no, but thank you for taking an interest! @LibertyofFG Buy what please? @desukidesu omg Iโ€™ve always ALWAYS wanted to be drew barrymore ๐Ÿ˜ฉ @TheWinegasm AHHHHHHHHH ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine
Retweeted by Cat @PatsATweetin ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @hatehug Urghhhhhh the worst. I think I managed to scare a few of the creeps off with my very public kick off at a married man last week ๐Ÿ˜† @PatsATweetin Oh god itโ€™s me @hatehug Dick ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @chudneyspears @janet_orenstein ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @hatehug ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ itโ€™s a good job I know you!deleting dating apps so I can find love the old fashioned way (he tells me heโ€™s Tyler Durden and we hold hands and watch buildings collapse) @Browtweaten Yeah my cat is completely happy being vegan Cat:
Retweeted by Cat @Shenanigans_luv ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ @PopeAwesomeXIII itโ€™s perfect @PressWm absolutely ๐Ÿ˜deleting dating apps so I can find love the old fashioned way (we dance, I overdose on heroin and he drives a hypodโ€ฆ @PressWm my kitchen ๐Ÿ’– @Invisichad Argh thatโ€™s such a complement from you ๐Ÿฅฐ @pantless_papple Iโ€™m really fond of it ๐ŸŒˆ @Lottie_Poppie Ty lovely ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’–I donโ€™t think Iโ€™ve shared my art much on here but here you goโ€ฆ.. ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿปโ€๐ŸŽจ entire premise of How I Met Your Mother is deeply weird. Imagine sitting down your teenage kids and just regaliโ€ฆ
Retweeted by Cat @mom_tho And I love you! ๐Ÿ’– @steeve_again ๐Ÿฆ๐Ÿ’– @colourmesad tysm ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’– @thehdrk Ty darling ๐Ÿ’– @mommeh_dearest ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿฅฐpeep the au naturel hair u ice cream man i know you saw me
Retweeted by Cat @dedHESHr whyโ€™s that then?gm, I just blocked 2 incels letโ€™s fucking goooooooo @JamesDodgier Lmao please do not confused women with OF to women that want to have sex with you. Itโ€™s business and thatโ€™s it @NebbyMcNebulous Urggghhhh so much. Itโ€™s actually assault
@VDillerud what @roastmalone_ *deep breath*