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ADHD, cats, plants, shitposting. Sometimes I paint things! Paintings, mostly. She/her. yes I look like Jessica Hynes I KNOW

886 Following   8,830 Followers   47,613 Tweets

Joined Twitter 10/3/09

@DaynaEMCraig @halkyardo They’ll never take ANYONE, alive or dead That’s why they’re the horny police @DaynaEMCraig I have no idea how I make the 2 metre journey from my toilet to sink; I think some sort of base survival instinct kicks in @llamalluv Stop making it so easy for me @halkyardo It’s 100% true, release the horny police @ZiziFothSi This is the future Katie wants
Retweeted by Katie @ttvmurphyowo It’s PRACTICALLY FREE @wulfansur @Wangleberry This is one of the sole benefits of having to have an audio stream going 24/7 - I pick up a… @HorzaEdeo Oh that is so completely charming!I, of course, am a Lady and thus never use the toilet, but I’ve heard that this can happenThe real pain of ADHD is when you start reading something super interesting while on the toilet and by the time you… clinical depression is highly genetic which means there is a direct line between me and my one incredibly sa…
Retweeted by KatieIN MY DEFENSE everything was either £1 or £2.50 @SteCollins One of them is a kalanchoe humilis that was down to £1 - it’s lost all its markings due to being out of… @andyprice I understand you entirely and I want some black velvet nasturtium seeds to add to my four or five other… I went to b&q and accidentally bought four succulents and a saxifrage, I am beyond help @thixotropic My WORD @Wangleberry (Thankfully though a synthetic version is available - but it’s taking ages for the industry to change over to it 🙄) @Wangleberry So yes, bloodletting an ancient arthropod is vital to the worldwide biomedical industry @Wangleberry So every year around 500,000 horseshoe crabs are harvested by the biomedical industry, drained of 30%… @Wangleberry In essence, horseshoe crab blood is a phenomenal detector of contamination - anything it’s exposed to… @Wangleberry This means that when their body encounters an infection or bacteria or whatever toxin, they don’t have… @Wangleberry OH MY GOD Basically, because they’re so ancient, horseshoe crabs don’t have b… @Wangleberry Oh dude do you know about the horseshoe crab blood harvest??This is one of my favourite all-time animals. It is a Boxer Crab, or Pom Pom Crab (Lybia edmondsoni). They carry se…
Retweeted by Katie @bendaenerys I dabbled in all of these areas but first and foremost it was Greek mythology hell yes @halkyardo Freaks on the peaks is just a synonym for horny on main
I just rediscovered this video of Mrs Fuzzypants doing a happy little purr-sigh and I am charmed @itsdaneesaur @SteCollins SHE’S SO PRETTY @jackdumbi @gtf0kelly @kittypeets I mean you’re wrong but ok whatever @holly Anyone who isn’t seeing that the failure to hold on to the bar is at the heart of the matter should not be allowed on the tube @halkyardo @Beardynoise @Brainmage THAT’S A GOURMET @holly Why wasn’t he holding on?? WHY WOULD YOU NOT HOLD ON??? @stuartmwrites @RichFiend Yes @Beardynoise @Brainmage WHEEEEEEN THEEEEE PASTE HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG MISO PIE @RichFiend All of them @Brainmage You should really consider the optics of this situationHonestly you’re asking the wrong person BRAND mental health is pretty ok right now don’t worry, I’m just very tired and everything is irritating meMaintaining adequate mental health - thankless - tiring - have to eat healthy Going quite flagrantly, splendidly… @nextcontext @EwaSR Save yourself while you still canFeeling in the mood to buy and move into a deserted lighthouse and start a vlog documenting my inevitable descent into madness hbu @allwrongthink Sounds fake @rootfsext2gz @itsdaneesaur He’s GROOMING our CHILDREN And also HIMSELF @MadelaineLucieH “No! Not like Louise!” @rootfsext2gz @itsdaneesaur BENEFITS SCROUNGER demands SCRITCHES from GOVERNMENT, doesn’t even SPEAK ENGLISH @EwaSR Jesus, even my upper-middle class wealthy boomer businessman dad doesn’t get in. That’s the rest of us buggered. @itsdaneesaur He is guilty of having the pinkest nose That’s twenty years in jail @stillicides If people don’t know the precise shape of my unborn baby’s genitals I am going to LOSE my SHIT - this woman, apparently @Wangleberry Let me know if you ever want in on a novel-writing group chat 👀 @itsdaneesaur CLEAVAGE @katie_eckler Most definitely
@Winskillfull @Beardynoise I mean you wouldn’t necessarily have to look at yourself @Beardynoise It just seems like a really obvious decision @Beardynoise Surely even straight people are curious?? Like, nobody knows your body better than your cloneTHIS CAT IS NAMED PIGEON TURN YOUR SOUND ON
Retweeted by Katie @allwrongthink @halkyardo @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @chton What time? I work Saturdays but could possibly make it in the evening! @halkyardo @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @chton @allwrongthink Is there any difference between me binging mediocre tv… @halkyardo @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @chton @allwrongthink Based on how productive sea shanties make me I’m foste… was just reminded of the existence of this tumblr post and now I’m gifting the knowledge of it to you lot, you’re… @Brainmage @kxthleen This looks like it’s from a jade plant? If so, they’re remarkably hard to kill, so you don’t need to worry about it much! @kxthleen Pop it on top of some cactus soil and leave it to do its thing! Once it gets decent roots going you can g… @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @chton @allwrongthink (Amazing, incredible, thank you) @Atunci_CoV Brilliant, thank you! @itsdaneesaur BIRFDAY!!! I will put a birthday hat on one of the boys later in your honour @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @chton @allwrongthink (This reminds me - Anna do you have a recommended sea shanty Spotify list or whatever) @daniel_barker @chton @BootsMcGoot @allwrongthink That’s just what an ancient sailor would say to throw one off track @OhLookBirdies Start a Patreon @Atunci_CoV Do you have a link to hand? I don’t know that one but I love Eddie Izzard! @OhLookBirdies This is a quality tweet, bloody well done @ZiziFothSi Inflectious diseases
Retweeted by Katie @ZiziFothSi "I'm sorry, I just got a call from my doctor. Yeah. I'm Glaswegian. You should get tested."
Retweeted by Katie @stillinhoney Trying desperately to cover it up while the spouse is like “SAY ‘SQUIRREL’”I’m afraid to say you’ve caught scouse @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @allwrongthink Yelp review “it’s there”, three starsSpeculative fiction prompt: sexually transmitted accents @BootsMcGoot @daniel_barker @allwrongthink I mean, was it that they were really tasty, or was it that they were so… love and support my cryptid son
Retweeted by Katie @daniel_barker @allwrongthink I WANT THE THYLACINE BACK @Beardynoise Oh shit I thought you were talking about the one who preserved a toe in a jar at first Tumblr, man @holly I am so so sorry to just be hearing about this - anyone who says she was “just a cat” is leading life withou…
@Bolt_451 Oh yeah, my local pub is dog-friendly and near the vet’s where I work, so I frequently get to go in there… of my first thoughts upon waking this morning was “i feel like shit and i want to die” except it was in the cad…
Retweeted by Katie @Bolt_451 Off the top of my head I can think of three pubs and one garden centre near me that have resident cats, and that is NOT ENOUGH @Bolt_451 Every shop should have a cat. I know I’m 90% more likely to frequent a venue of any sort if there’s a chance of meeting oneThe replies when you criticize billionaires
Retweeted by Katie @halkyardo I want to eat them @PigletParker NTA, seek couples counsellingperfect image
Retweeted by Katie @Wangleberry @Glitter_brawl @BootsMcGoot Oh my god I just crossed my legs so hard reading this But also yeah, cer… took a two-day adhd med holiday and I don’t think anyone has ever been this tired @stillicides This, and with cats also. I wonder what other animals do it? @soapachu I mean, I’M jealous of it
@therobotduchess @JeffEMcFresh It’s one of the reasons! The other is that they frequently gulp air as they breathe,… way this man says gemini is what’s finally going to drive me to the brink of madness
Retweeted by Katieaddams family is funny because it was meant as a subversion of regular western family values, and so the wife and h…
Retweeted by Katie @ZiziFothSi The noble eggplant, noted for its classic teardrop shape.
Retweeted by Katie @halkyardo Yes @halkyardo The whole account is a gift/a curse